|Say It Ain't So!
Author: Ahja Reyn PM
Harry's on a mission to stop Draco from leaving him, taking some of the most drastic measures imaginable to get his point across...contains satire attacking popular HP fandom clichésRated: Fiction M - English - Humor - Harry P. & Draco M. - Chapters: 8 - Words: 4,493 - Reviews: 201 - Favs: 59 - Follows: 87 - Updated: 06-02-07 - Published: 08-05-06 - id: 3087049
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Title: Say It Ain't So!
Rating: M cuz I said so.
Disclaimer: Jest cause I play with them doesn't mean I own them.
Warnings: attack on the time traveling children fandom and the extreme OOCness of the world
Author's Note: I have no idea how large this cliché in the fandom is…and I don't own the store Fuzziwigg's, which you can visit in a loverly little town called Strawberry Springs, Colorado.
Draco blinked. Twice, to make sure he wasn't seeing things. And then he pinched himself on the arm. Hard.
Damn. The scene was still before him and the pain he now felt assured him he wasn't dreaming.
"You'd…like to introduce me to whom?" he asked, deciding that surely he hadn't heard right.
"Our son! From the future!" Harry stated proudly, throwing an arm around the boy beside him who looked slightly uncomfortable at this whole setup.
"I was down at Fuzziwigg's buying candy before getting ready to sneak off to meet you like always, and he just appeared in front of me! It's a sign, I tell you!"
"Potter, you can't go grabbing every strange child you bump into who has blond hair and green eyes and declare them your child," Draco scolded, sorely wishing he hadn't bumped into his lover in the middle of the crowded Hogsmeade street.
"Our child. Ours," Harry clarified. "And he isn't just some completely random stranger! Look! He has your chin!"
With a defeated sigh, Draco began rummaging through his robes.
"I know it may come as quite a shock," the Gryffindor stated confidentially. "Even I didn't believe him at first when he told me. But then he revealed that the future you had sent him back in time to stop yourself from going on some asinine trip over the summer…"
"Here," the Slytherin said, handing the small boy a large pouch of money. "I'm giving you 20 galleons to forget everything this dunderhead has said to you up until now. That includes you going away and not mentioning this to anyone. Ever."
Large green eyes positively glowed as the child happily accepted the pay off and ran back to the candy store, ignoring the darker male's protests.
"Hey! You can't just-!"
"Are we going for a snog or what?" Draco asked, abruptly turning away and heading towards the outskirts of the village.
…Okay, so the Malfoy won this round of F.U.C.K.M.E.F.A.I.T.H. But next time, Harry would be sure to wait until after his libido had been satisfied before trying out a new plan.