TITLE: Five Things You Should Never Say To Haley James Scott About Brooke Davis (As Told By Nathan Scott)
AUTHOR: RedMagic
EMAIL: I’m going to go with a big yes!
ARCHIVE/DISTRIBUTION: My site, here, lj user crimsonredmagic anyone else ask and you shall receive.
PAIRING: Try and guess
RATING: PG-13
DISCLAIMER: All belongs to the creators of OTH. If I was to own it the show would be a hell of a lot different. (example: Brooke/Haley would be a couple and they’d invite Jake along for some fun!)

“Girls like Brooke”

This will cause Haley to bestow the quiet treatment on you all day until later that night when she will then proceed to blow up at you later that night and ask you exactly what you meant by saying what you said.

“Why is she always here?”

This will cause not only Haley but also Brooke to look up at you and glare before going back to doing whatever they were doing before you interrupted them with your very innocent question.

It will also result in you sleeping alone that night while your wife falls asleep in the lounge room watching chick flicks with the bane of your existence.

“I don’t like the way she looks at you”

Will cause Haley to roll her eyes at you and ask exactly how Brooke looks at her.

It will also cause her to lapse into a dreamlike state when she thinks you’re not looking.

“MAYBE SHE”S A LESBIAN”

This will result in a serious fight breaking out over your lack of sensitivity and juvenile behavior. Also be prepared for a serious tongue lashing about how even if Brooke was a lesbian it doesn’t make her any less our friend.

“IT’S HER OR ME”

Be prepared for the surprise of your life.

Saying this will result in Haley rather quickly making the decision that if it is indeed Brooke or you then she picks Brooke.

Now you’re left in a half empty apartment while your soon to be ex wife is playing house with her new girlfriend.