CHAPTER THREE

TALK, TALK, TALK

The scene below would have bothered a lot of people. What with the sunlight glaring off of windows which just zoomed on by. One after another after another after another. Well you get the point. But to the white lighter that was standing on top of the Golden Gate Bridge it was peaceful. Much better than being in the manor which was so closed up. She hated being closed in to the walls and the ceilings. At times she wished she never had to be inside ever again, but the white lighter knew that her place wasn't outside but inside. Always on the inside.

Even now with her being outside she was still inside. The white lighter hated the inside. She loved the outside. But she didn't know how to remain outside even when she is inside. If that makes any sense at all. Even to the white lighter that reasoning didn't make sense. But it was what the psychiatrist she had seen after her adopted parent's death had said. But of course she just nodded politely and shook his hands and left and never went back. This white lighter had never had any use for talking out her problems to a psychiatrist or to anyone else for that matter. That was why she always felt like she was in a closed up room even when she was outside.

But the white lighter felt peaceful on top of Golden Gate Bridge, this was the one place that she didn't feel like the walls were baring down around her or above her. No one knew but only one person knew that this was the place that would be safe to ask her questions about herself and the white lighter would answer them truthfully. Only the male white lighter who was more like a brother than anything else knew the the truth. Only the male white lighter knew the whole truth of the female white lighter. Only he understood and shared his compassion to the female white lighter. But the male white lighter keeps telling the female white lighter that she must con find in her family to be there for her.

The white lighter on top of the Golden Gate Bridge is a very private person and hates to talk about herself. She liked to talk, not to listen to her own voice, like some people think. But she liked to talk to stop the walls and the roof from craving around her. She figured if she continued to talk and talk and talk than she would be safe until she could orb herself to her one safe place on earth. But she knew that she would soon run out of words and she would be repeating herself. Than the people would leave her to be alone.

The white lighter couldn't stand to be alone. Ever, even through she kept telling her family that she just wanted to be alone once more with her thoughts and her life; she never wanted to be alone. Aloneness was what caused her claustraphobia. Everyone thought that she was afraid to be in rooms with no windows, in a way that was the truth. But what really caused the claustraphobia was aloness. Even when she is among the people who love her and are closets to her she feels alone. It had always been that way even when she was a mere babe. It was caused when she could no longer sense being in her mother's arms.

Orb lights lit up before the white lighter could contiune along the lines of her thoughts.

"It's time you went back to the manor, Paige, your sisters need you." Sam softly said.

"I just want to stay here a little longer." Paige said not letting go of the sight of the traffic far below her. "I'm not ready to leave yet."

"Wyatt is calm now he won't be screaming any longer." Sam said wrapping his arms across his chest as he turned his face to face the side of his daughter's eyes.

"I'm not here because of him." Paige lied without turning to her father. She felt like the walls were coming in and around her once again. This white lighter who was in fact her biological father made her tense inside. He even ruined her peacefulness up here on the bridge. She hated him for that. Yet she couldn't hate him, because he was her father, so she in fact truly did love him. Although she would never admit that to him, it was much much too soon for a warm father / daugher moment.

Sam touched Paige's shoulder and both of the orbed off of the bridge.

HALLIWELL MANOR OUTSIDE

"I could have orbed home on my own, Sam, I didn't need your assistance." Paige turned around and faced her father with a dark look on her face. She wrapped her arms across her chest as she glared into her father's open and calm face.

"You wouldn't have. Not until you sensed a demon attack." Sam said with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Leave." Paige growled.

Sam opened his mouth to speak, but than closed it once more. He saw the look in Paige's eyes and knew that he would get no way with this daughter of his. "If you need me than call me."

"I'll never need you." Paige spat out.

"Yes you will." Sam replied.

"In your dreams." Paige quickly said. "I'll never call you."

"You soul will call for me and I'll be by your side." Sam said and orbed out.

Paige just remained where she stood with her arms still across her chest and her chin out, and the same dark look on her face. She didn't know how long she stood their silently berating her father for leaving her when she was only two days old, but the next thing she knew was she was being touched. She quickly turned around and was about to call something to vanquish the demon who had the nerve to touch when she saw the very started look on Phoebe's face. "How many times do I have to tell you not to touch me like that." She demanded hotly.

"I'm sorry Paige, I forgot." Phoebe said meekly as she dropped her hands back to her sides. She tilted her head. "Why are you in such a rotten mood?"

"I'm not in a rotten mood." Paige spat out.

"Oh." Phoebe's eyes rounded. She shook her head. "I know why I'm in a rotten mood, but I would like to know why you are."

"Has Jason gone after you again." Paige asked slowly allowing her personal anger to leave her as she could see that her older sister truly was in a pissed off mood, but Paige sensed that something is was bothering Phoebe.

"Are you surprised." Phoebe spat out as she stormed towards the front door of the manor. She opened it and slammed it shut.

Paige looked on shocked at the tone of her half sister's voice. It's like Phoebe is more angry at me than at Jason. What did I do. She was about to follow her sister into the house to find out how she wrong her when she turned around to the driveway. She saw that her Green VW bug was sitting in it's usual spot in the street. She walked to it and got into the drivers side and decided that she was going to drive around a bit than go in and face her sister.

Paige turned the CD to her faviote song and rolled down her windows as she tried to enjoy the nice warm San Fransico day but with no such luck. She stopped at a stop light and knew that she wouldn't get any pleasure of a drive, she turned back around and head back to the manor. She got out of her car and started up towards the front door.

Paige opened the front door and still felt the tension in the manor, taking a deep breath she decided to do what she did best, that was to talk and talk a lot. It was the only way she could think of for hiding her overwhelming panic attack. Luckly Wyatt was screaming at the moment so she didn't feel like she needed to orb out. She knew that her sisters and Leo knew the truth on why she orbed out whenever Wyatt screamed, but she also knew that they would never bring it up, they were just waiting for her to bring it up herself. Well they had a long wait ahead of them. Because Paige would never bring her

claustraphobia up ever.

END CHAPTER THREE