Warning: Extreme time on me and my friend's hands has lead to this insane story. It just kind of happened.

Disclaimer: I don't own Devil May Cry even though I would like to.

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Considering since Sparda has lived so long, you can probably guess the amount of riches he has. You can also probably guess that he got married, had kids, and lived a happy life. Well…about that happy part…it was a lie. The happy wouldn't have ended if Eva hadn't gotten pregnant, with two twin boys to be exact. Who…later on in their lives will be the bane of existence for their father later on. But, I'm getting ahead of myself. The story starts in a Dracula sized mansion in England, when Eva shouts, "OH MY GOD, I'M PREGNANT!"

Sparda, who during that time, was in the mansions library, reading a book, hears his wife's words. The book suddenly fell limp from his hands as his eyes rolled back and promptly fainted on the floor.

Eva runs to her husband after hearing the loud 'thump' of a body hitting the floor, and finds him there, dead to the world. She grabs him by the shirt and slaps him, repeatedly, across the face.

"Wake up! I'm pregnant! I'm pregnant!"

He jerks from her grasp and rubs his face. "For a human, that kind of stung."

And from that point on his life was a total mess…well not exactly that point.

One day Eve goes out telling Sparda that their two beautiful twin boys were sleeping (that's what she thought) in their room. Later on that day Sparda was told by a fellow hunter that Eva was killed by a phantom. Sparda starred blankly into space for a while, not knowing how to morn the ache in his heart when he heard a crash in the other room. He opens the door to where the boys were sleeping to find Dante trying to bite Vergil while he had a stick trying to keep Dante at bay. Sparda raised an eyebrow and saw that the room looked like it been through hell and back. He shook his head and grabbed both boys by the collar of there shirt, Dante hanging form his right hand, Vergil on his left. He bought them eye level and said, "Aren't you two supposed to be sleeping?"

They both looked at each other then back to Sparda and said, "Uh…no."

Sparda sighed, "Well at least I have something to do the next 2 to 20 years."

So, that was when the trouble started, and the happy turned into many migraines, but I don't wanna give it away.

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