Okay... This was/is a script for a doujin that may or may not be drawn, but I had to share nonetheless. It was an idea that I've kicked about for a month or so, but after reading a few KOF Zillions, everything clicked into place and this lovely piece of dreck is the result. Be forwarned, in the sick little minds of myself and my circle, Mature and Vice are a couple. And NO this is not hentai. Not this time any way... ^^;
A Private Affair
a twisteed little conceit by Ruko Hanaji, with the occcaisional input from Lady Mags and Jei
(We first see a shot of Iori's Girlfriend's chin and neck, which is having an elegant necklace placed around it.)
Girlfriend: Oh, Iori..!
(We see the back of her head as she turns to Iori and hugs him; we never actually see her face in the comic.)
Iori: (coughs sheepishly) I know you don't like showy things, but I had to get it for you.
Girlfriend: Iori, it's beautiful! (they kiss, then pull apart) These last few months have been wonderful... I wish we could be this way forever. But...
Iori: (blinks) But what, love? (nervous) Is... Is the necklace too small? My god... It's a fake, isn't it! (starts fuming) I'll kill that damned jeweller! Lying bastard!
(Iori looks ready to Riot, but the Girlfriend quiets him with a hand on his sholder.)
Girlfriend: No, Iori, it isn't the necklace! It's only... (laughs) Maybe it's just me being silly, but sometimes I get the feeling that you're trying to keep our relationship... well, a secret.
Iori: Of course I am.
Girlfriend: ... What..?
Iori: Do you think I'd really be stupid enough to let anyone know about us?
Girlfriend: Oh, Iori...
(She bursts into tears, and Iori starts flailing.)
Iori: Ahh! What! What is it! What's wrong!
Girlfriend: (sobbing) Are you that ashamed of me?
Iori: What?! NO! (he grabs her and pulls her into an embrace) How could you ever think that? Look... (he tilts her chin up) There are a lot of people who'd love nothing better than to hurt you just to get back at me. I'd NEVER let that happen. That's why I've been so secretive.
(He kisses her, at which point the doorbell rings.)
Girlfriend: Who could that be..?
(The Girlfriend goes to the door, opening it with Iori behind her. Standing in the doorway with winning smiles are the Secretaries, Mature and Vice.)
Vice: Hi! ^^
Mature: Hello, Iori...
Iori: BEH! (he turns to his Girlfriend, his shoulders slumping) Okay, this is ANOTHER reason I haven't said anything.
Girlfriend: Are these... friends of yours, Iori?
Vice: (perkily) We're Yagami's roommates!
Iori: Lord help us all...
Girlfriend: Oh... You must be Mature and Vice! Iori's told me about you. Please come in.
(The Secretaries smile and step in. Iori glares at them as they walk past.)
Iori: Why couldn't you have stayed dead after I killed you the first time?
Vice: (smug) This is SNK. No one ever REALLY dies.
Mature: How many times has Geese Howard fallen out of a window?
(Next scene, all four sit having coffee. Iori sits in a chair looking annoyed, while the Secretaries are on the couch with the Girlfriend between them. Mature is very obviously flirting.)
Mature: So you are the lovely young lady that has stolen Iori's heart.
Girlfriend: Er... Yes.
Mature: (pouts prettily) Well, you have us at a disadvantage, dear... Iori's told you about Vice and I, but he hasn't told us ANYTHING about you.
Vice: (to Iori) Trying to keep her to yourself, eh Yagami? Greedy bastard.
(Iori glares at Vice and starts playing with the Orochi flame in his hand as if it were a lighter, lighting then extinguishing it.)
Mature: Really, Vice, can you blame him? She's stunning. (to the Girlfriend) But it seems a little unfair that you know about us and we don't even know your name...
Girlfriend: Oh! I'm sorry... I'm...
Iori: (cuts her off) Horribly busy with me right now. Don't you "ladies" have somewhere to be?
Vice: God, you're rude, Yagami! We're just trying to talk to... what was your name again..?
Iori: (interrupts again) You know, this was supposed to be an intimate evening until you two showed up!
Mature: (grins) It could still be an intimate evening, Iori...
(Mature leans in close, putting her arm up on the back of the couch and trailing a finger along the Girlfriend's shoulder. Iori jumps up, knocking over his chair.)
Iori: That's it! Party's over! Out!
Vice: (whines) But we just got here!
(Iori grabs the Secretaries and starts pushing them towards the door.)
Mature: Really, Iori! This is a bit extreme! We're just interested in what's going on in your life; we miss you!
Iori: Fine! (reaches into his pocket, then thrusts a wad of bills into Vice's hand) Here, go get a drink at the Illusion! I'll hook up with you later!
Vice: (counting out the money) One thousand yen? Boy, Yagami, you're a cheap bastard!
Mature: Unfortunately, Iori, there's a bit of a problem there... We've been banned from the Illusion for a month because of a certain incident.
(Mature looks pointedly at Vice, who blushes and shrugs.)
Vice: (grumbles) I was drunk... She's French... (falters, then blurts) Oh, come on! Are you REALLY gonna tell me King isn't just playing hard to get?
(Iori smacks his forehead and turns to Mature.)
Iori: (wheedling) Mature, do whatever you need to do to get King to let you stay until I get there, PLEASE! JUST GO!
Mature: (sniffs) If you're going to be that way about it, Iori... Come along, Vice. We're obviously not wanted here.
(Iori pushes them out the door, slamming it.)
Mature: ... I think that went rather well.
Vice: Yeah. (she grins and looks over one shoulder) So, is everything set, Kisaragi?
(Eiji Kisaragi appears out of nowhere with a camcorder in hand.)
Eiji: The cameras are all set up and ready to shoot. (indicates camcorder) Plus I'll be taping for your personal collection.
Mature: Wonderful. Thank you very much, Eiji. (to Vice) So, love, shall we be on our way?
(The next scene is King's bar, the Dancing Illusion. Plastered all over are posters: Tonight Only! Live Footage of Iori's Mysterious Lover! Five Thousand Yen Covercharge!)
King: Business is jumping tonight because oif this! If there's any way I can repay you, please let me know!
(Vice giggles, Mature elbows her.)
Mature: (hisses at Vice) Shut up, love. Do you want to get us barred for another month? (to King) It was no trouble at all.
Asobi wa owari da!
That's it... I know it's kinda pointless, but hey. Please let me know what you think. Even flames are welcome! If what I wrote affects you enough to waste your time to gripe at me, COOL! ^^