|Anatomy of aliens
Author: Fayth3 PM
In which Rose shows she is Jackie's daughter and gets a lesson in alien anatomyAN I actually read something like this years ago but have no idea in what ship, or what book, or which show. So i've snaffled it. If you have any idea where it's from tell me aRated: Fiction T - English - Humor - Words: 1,576 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 78 - Follows: 5 - Published: 11-13-06 - Status: Complete - id: 3243480
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Prompt #12- Bruise.
The Doctor knew that Rose Tyler was Jackie's daughter, had known it for some time. But it was one thing to know it and quite another to see it in action.
They had been captured and held prisoner for no other reason than they accidentally trespassed on sacred ground. Neither of them had any idea and had offered to make reparation to the Frennuldians, after all they hadn't damaged anything and they really were sorry.
But the Frennuldians had thrown them in a cell about seven hours ago, not realising that Rose was in the tail end of her hormonal cycle. She was dirty, she was tired and she had a huge bruise covering half her face from being thrown into the cell. She was also Jackie Tyler's daughter and had lost her temper.
It was the first time that the Doctor had seen her really lose it and he was staying well back in the shadows of the cell as she paced in front of the bars like an angry jungle cat.
An hour ago she had demanded to see the President of the planet and it was testament to her impressive genes that her demand had been acquiesced to.
They were fetching the President but were taking far too damn long about it and Rose was about to blow.
Her dire mutterings were getting louder and louder and the Doctor grimaced at some of the more imaginative threats and curses.
Jackie Tyler had, obviously, dated a sailor at some point.
There was a clank and Rose's head shot up as a large purple Frennuldian waddled in dressed in elaborate golden robes.
Frennuldians reminded Rose somewhat of the Flanimals created by Ricky Gervais. They looked like large blobs of pulsating jelly with two buggy eyes staring out blankly at her.
The Frennuldian leader was larger and more gelatinous that any of the others and it's similarity to a blancmange wasn't helping Rose's mood any.
He wobbled imperiously over to the cell and it opened, his large quivering mass taking up the bulk of the door in case they tried to escape.
Rose, however, had been simmering for over seven hours and was in mood to try to escape.
She turned to the President and glowered. "And where the hell have you been?"
The Doctor winced, images of her mother filling his vision.
The Frennuldian chittered something that the Doctor couldn't hear but could guess at as Rose planted her hands on her hips.
Rose, herself, had finally had it. She was in pain and filthy, she had been poked, prodded, groped and otherwise manhandled by a plate of jelly. She wanted a cup of tea, her bed and maybe a hug from the Doctor.
She also realised that she was hungry and needed the loo which was why she was understandably upset when the Frennuldian President replied that he had been at a feast.
"What?" she screeched. "You were feasting?
"Day of peace here," the Frennuldian explained and the Doctor closed his eyes as Rose erupted.
"Day of peace? Peace for who? Do you have any idea how long we've been stuck here with nothing to eat or drink? That's against Geneva Convention rules let alone common decency. You try telling me that your planet is all peaceable and yet you couldn't even provide a glass of whatever passes for water around here?"
Rose moved in and the Frennuldian actually wobbled back a few steps. "See this bruise?" she yelled, pointing to her face. "Is that your idea of peace? Cuz where I come from that's police brutality."
"The matter will be addressed."
"Damn right!" Rose leaned forward and poked hard at the Frennuldian's chest. "And I'll tell you something else for nothing …"
The Doctor suddenly spoke. "Ah, Rose?"
She ignored him and continued her tirade. "Nowhere on your sacred ground did it say it was scared ground. Would it hurt to put a sign up?" She poked him again and again, her temper starting to really hit its peak.
"One little plaque to let us know that we weren't supposed to be there? Or give us a warning first, yeah? But no, you have to arrest us;" poke "beat us up," poke "and throw us in jail!"
"Rose, you should know—"
"Is that peaceable I ask you?" Poke. "Is it?" Poke. "Not from where I'm standing!"
All around her the guards and other gelatinous aliens were staring at the odd spectacle of this small human poking their President who had gone quite quiet and simply trembled in one place.
"Uh… Rose?" the Doctor tried again but she was having none of it.
"You didn't even have the decency to come straight away, you were feasting!" she yelled, pleased that he had frozen in position. "Well, I'm hungry!" Poke. "I'm tired!" Poke. "I'm filthy and I'm fed up!"
The President began to make whimpering noises and vibrated even harder. Rose stepped back.
"Are you going to let us out?"
He wobbled his head, which she took as a 'no' and she slammed her finger into his chest.
"Let us out!"
The Doctor grabbed her hand and pulled her back slightly as the President shivered and shook, finally gave a shudder.
Rose frowned. "I didn't hit him that hard."
"No, but he said yes."
"Oh." She bit her lip. "That was a yes?"
"Oh yes." She could hear amusement in the Doctor's voice but didn't know why.
The President stared at her as in abject fear and she felt a little bad for hitting him but as she stepped forward to apologise for losing her temper he shuffled back quickly, leaving the door open.
"Free," he squeaked. "Go."
Rose let a satisfied grin slip over her face. "Good. See that wasn't so hard was it?" She turned to look up at the Doctor who had his mask firmly in place.
They walked freely out of the cell and the guards all watched carefully as Rose made her way to freedom.
The President trilled something incomprehensible at the Doctor who shook his head quickly. "Uh, no. Not this one. Sorry. Far too valuable."
"What?" Rose whispered but silenced when he shook his head, meaning he'd tell her later.
She tried to ignore the way they all stared at her as she left.
As they walked back to the TARDIS Rose caught the Doctor staring at her from out of the corner of his eye.
"What?" she asked, somewhat embarrassed that he'd seen her lose her temper.
"Nothing," he shot back, a grin in his voice but not on his face.
"At least I got us out," she muttered.
"That you did," he agreed jovially.
She could see he was trying hard not to laugh and she had had it. "What? What's so funny?"
"Funny?" he shrugged. "I'll tell you about funny. Funny is humans assuming that all species are built in the same way. Feet on end of legs, brain in head, lungs in chest."
"Hilarious." She rolled her eyes.
"Some species are created differently," he continued on as if he hadn't heard her sarcasm. "Slitheen, for instance keep their kidneys in their knees. Smashing that, boot 'em in the knee, they're on the floor for an hour. Dissencians from Greater Gher have their hearts in each hand and holding hands is the same as intercourse."
Rose raised an eyebrow and looked down at their entwined fingers.
"And, of course, everyone knows that Frennuldians have their genitals in their chest."
Rose froze. "What?"
The Doctor turned to her, dropping her hand, the amusement creeping through. "Oh yeah, keeps 'em cocooned, warm and safe. You can feel it just below the surface though, and they can certainly feel it. The harder the better, obviously."
She looked down at her hand. "You mean I just …. I just…"
"Got 'im off?" He grinned. "Yeah."
Her mouth dropped open as she stared at her hand in horror.
"Thing is, Frennuldians have a very low pleasure threshold, because of where the genitals are placed. You must have been good for him to … release so quickly."
"Yeah." His grin threatened to explode. "That's why he asked if you were for sale. Pleasure like that doesn't come easily … well, for him it did. That's why he wanted you. I'd say that—"
"Don't!" Rose held up her hands. "Please. In fact let's never mention this again, okay?"
"Rose Tyler, best hand job in the—"
He was cut off as Rose slapped him in the chest.
He rubbed his sternum where he knew he'd have a bruise later. He just gave her a big grin. "Doesn't do it for me, I'm afraid. A little lower next time."
Rose gave a huge groan and started to cover her face with her hands, just stopping as she remembered what that hand had just been doing.
She swallowed. "I'll hit lower, harder, once a night and twice on Sundays. Just tell me we have bleach on board?"
The Doctor laughed out loud and pulled her along back to the TARDIS.
Rose was grateful but had one last request. "Next time, we go with your way of escaping, yeah?"