A/N: What chapter am I on?? Oh well! Let’s make up a number!

Chapter 300673

“Riku, come and get your cookies, sweetie.”

“Yay! I love it when you make cookies!”

“I made them especially for you, my dear, so eat as many as you’d like! They’re filled with bunches of love!”

“Thank you so much, Ansem!”

end of flashback

Riku sat alone in the dark cellar. He had gotten ten times skinnier because he refused to eat anything the fangirls tried to feed him, thinking he would get some kind of disease and die. A monkey appeared at a window way above him.

“Abu! It’s about time! Where have you been, buddy?” Riku tried to stand, but he was too weak.

The monkey jumped down and started to yell at him in some weird foreign language. Riku merely nodded, apologized, and was set free.

“Hey! That’s my monkey!” Said a streetrat on the other side of the room.

“Who are you?” Riku still couldn’t stand. He was so hungry.

“Screw you!” The monkey jumped into the cage that was inside the cart the boy was holding. There were a bunch of other bags and suitcases with it. He directed his attention towards the wall, ran at full speed, and disappeared. Wide-eyed, Riku heard something fall. It was a wand, along with an instruction booklet.

“Hmm? A magical wand?” Riku crawled slowly over to it, picking up the instruction booklet and examining the wand. He found a spell for healing everything.

“Locomura!” He said at himself. Suddenly he felt all better, like he could do anything. Riku stood up and ran up billions of stairs to get to the top of the cellar. He unlocked the door with the wand and proceeded out.

Meanwhile, Sora and company had already landed at the castle. Ansem was already there, tapping his foot impatiently.

“When did you get here?” Sora asked. He looked down and saw that Ansem was chained by his feet to a doghouse. He looked rather embarrassed at the scene.

“This is what happens when you guys leave me all alone!” Ansem snorted.

“Ohh, Ansem, dear! I brought your shrimp platter!”

Ansem’s eyes widened. “Hide, you idiots, or they’ll capture you too!”

The gang did so behind the bushes and watched as a few crazed girls walked up to Ansem.

“I have arrived!”

“Why thank you, my princess.” Ansem bowed.

Kairi giggled. “Roleplay?”

“It seems to be very common with fangirls these days.” Roxas whispered.

“Make me your Queen.” The fangirl boasted.

“Yes, my love. The day you become my Queen is the day I die and go to—candyland.”

Kairi couldn’t stop giggling, so Sora kissed her to shut her up. Ansem was so lame it was killing her.

Another fangirl ran out and informed the roleplaying freak. “Mrs. Uchiha! Riku has escaped!”

Glad to hear about Riku, Axel, Roxas, Sora, Kairi and Namine definitely wanted to listen now. However, the girls were now whispering about it, which made it difficult for them to figure out what was going on.

The fangirls ran for the castle. Once it appeared that they were gone, Riku appeared in his normal body and a cape. Sora and the others popped out of the bushes and ran towards him. Sora glomped him, causing Riku to scream. Scared for their lives, the gang decided to load into the pirate ship and set sail. However, they weren’t fast enough to escape the sightings of a fangirl guard.

“WAIT, WHERE’S AXEL?” Roxas yelled, looking around. They all heard a scream coming from the island.

“HELP! GOSH DON’T TOUCH THERE! THAT’S PRIVATE, HOT, AND FOR ROXAS’ HANDS ONLY!”

“So you DO love Roxas!” Another fangirl squeal.

“NO! IT’S NOT LIKE THAT! GUYS! HELP ME!”

“We have to go back!” Roxas yelled. He pushed Jack Sparrow out of the way and steered the ship back to the island.

They all jumped back on the island, including Jack Sparrow and Captain Hook. Jack took one look at Captain Hook and started to laugh.

“Ey, mate. You’re so outta date! Where’s me rum? Damn you, I say where’s me rum!” He started to shake Hook.

“Guys! Are you coming?” Kairi yelled from the door.

“Oh, right! Rum’s this way!” Jack threw the Captain on the ground, leaving him to grieve with one very strange fangirl of his.

The gang entered the fangirl castle. On the walls were pictures of every anime and video game character imaginable (mostly guys) such as Tidus, Naruto, Harry Potter, and even Tuxedo Mask. Sora walked up to a picture of him and Riku kissing, that obviously one of the girls in the castle drew. He blushed severely.

“Sora, what’s the matter?” Kairi looked up at the picture and nearly screamed. “That’s nasty! Come on!” She pulled him away from the picture and walked up the stairs. Roxas’ eyes were fixed on another picture, but of him and Axel.

“Roxas!” They all called from the top of the stairs. This place strangely looked like Hallow Bastion to Sora.

“I fought Riku here…” Sora said.

“You seem to forget that I’m right here.” Riku waved his hand up. “Yo.”

“OH RIKU!” Sora wrapped his arms around him. “I missed you, man!”

“Sora…”

“I had so many dreams about you… it made me wonder if—“

“Sora….”

“If I was… gay… or something… because…”

“SORA!”

They looked above them and saw the fangirls. There were approximately seventeen of them, all looking over the railing on the second floor. Their leader was in the middle.

“GASP!” Kairi shouted.

“Oh, I knew you’d come back to me, my little snuggle-wuggle-Riku-poo!” Mrs. Uchiha said. She pointed up to the chandelier, where Axel was swinging on it. Axel didn’t dare to jump, but this was really starting to bug Roxas.

“Axel! I’ll save you, don’t worry!”

Squeals hurt the gang’s ears. Roxas tried to find some stairs, but couldn’t. He saw a door over on the left side, and without thought, ran for it. He had entered a library.

“Now, may I say, that is a lovely dog you’ve got there!” Jack said to Mrs. Uchiha, who felt like she had just been scolded.

“It’s my Sora plushie!”

“What? That’s the ugliest thing of me I’ve ever seen!” Sora yelled.

The fangirls gasped and jumped down, circling the gang.

“How dare you insult yourself like that!” Said one of the stupider ones.

“Kairi should die!”

“Namine should burn!”

“They should be with each other and let me have Sora or Roxas!”

“No! I want Sora!”

“I want Roxas!” The fangirl’s only weaknesses were fighting with each other about which one they would be with.

Sora and the gang took this opportunity to follow Roxas and head into the library.

A/N: Well? You like it? Right? So review it!