A/N: I'm not dead! I swear! I've just been very busy with junior year, and school has been crazy. I wrapped this story up, but I made sure to leave it open for a sequel. I already know in my mind the whole story about Jack's wife and daughter (no, its non canon for all those of you flipping out thinking I have insider info) but I felt introducing a whole new plot line at this points would be too confusing. Also, this story is now obviously made A/U by the reunion of the Doctor and Jack in Utopia, but I might find a way to work in a backstory for Jack while keeping it canon. Anyways, writing this story was really fun, I'm sorry it took so long to finish.

Also, it had been brought to me attention that this chapter esp. seems like Jack/Doctor slash. If you want to look at it that way, thats fine. I see it as a very close, platonic relationship, and the kissing if just Jack being Jack. But everyone has their own opinion, and you can look at it any way you like.

Thank you to everyone who reviewed!!!

“You want the truth Jack? Than why does your team look so shocked? You forgot to tell them about your daughter and wife, about being a conman? About the lives you ruined? You say you don’t want to be a hero but still you come back and save the day again and again. And I’m sorry I left you, if I had any doubt about your death I would not have gone. I heard you die Jack! Do you have any idea what that was like? Don’t belittle what Rose and I went through grieving. We loved you and losing you damn near killed Rose. She almost left because of it…almost. I’m sorry Jack. I don’t what else to tell except that I am so bloody sorry!” The Doctor yelled the last part at Jack, who’s face was twisted with rage.

Jack stepped right up to the Doctor, their faces inches from each other’s. For a second Gwen thought that Jack was going to punch him again, obviously Owen had the same though he was about to grab Jack from behind. Instead, Jack reached up with both hands and pulled the Doctor into him, crushing his lips against the Doctor’s in a strong, vicious kiss. He kept pulling the Doctor towards him, closer and closer as if he could absorb the Doctor into him, to make up for the years and years of waiting.

The Doctor was caught completely off guard. He too, had been prepared for the sting of Jack’s fast against his face. So when he felt Jack’s lips on his he hadn’t resisted. It was so much different than last time, the last time he saw Jack alive. That kiss had been filled with resignation, and his lips had lingered as if savoring the taste of both Rose and the Doctor on his lips. This kiss was filled with raw desperation and renewed passion.

Jack and the Doctor stood intertwined, Jack pressing himself against the Doctor, desperate to find some remainder of what had been between them before. And the Doctor, for all his years and his knowledge, felt confusion cloud his mind. This was not his Jack, he realized this now, but what was he supposed to do now? And in the background, feeling an insignificance they rarely felt as members of an elite alien fighting team, were the remaining members of Torchwood. They looked at the display of raw emotion from their normally reserved boss, and they experienced a myriad of emotions.

Owen hated this feeling. He had no idea what he should be doing with himself, and worse than that he felt useless. On one hand, we wanted to walk out of the room. He felt that by seeing this reunion, by witnessing the passionate kiss, he was violating something sacred. Yet…he was rooted to the spot. All the answers he had craved since he had first met this mysterious Captain Jack Harkness, all the what’s and why’s and who’s he had desired were being spilt right in front of him. He couldn’t leave.

Tosh had known from the moment she had met Jack that she would never understand what he was. She herself was not all that complicated. Her wealthy family had seen intellect and promise, has sent her to the college she wanted to go, and supported her financially from Japan. They only knew she was doing very important top-secret work, and they were proud. Her desires centered on the discovery and advancement of technology. Until Mary, Tosh had never even thought about planning a future with someone else. She had always assumed she would work, and the rest would fall into place. After Mary, Tosh had felt that she could relate more with Jack. Jack had opened up slightly, dropping small hints about his past, hints that Tosh ate up with vigor. Yet this man shows up, this alien, says barely a word, and suddenly Jack was pouring out his heart. She too, wanted to walk away. She couldn’t see Jack weak, didn’t want to see their unfailingly strong leader finally succumb to whatever sway this Doctor held over him. But…she would not leave. She could not leave. If Jack couldn’t be strong, then maybe she could be.

Ianto, on the other hand, wanted to stay. He needed to, felt it his responsibility to give Jack the support to face this man from his past. Of all of the team, Ianto was the only one who had known about the Doctor. He was the maid, the errand boy, the secretary, and therefore he was invisible. He would hear Jack mutter to himself during his long, sleepless nights. He would catch a glimpse of something on a computer screen before Jack hurriedly exited out. He has found ways to pry information from Jack, asking seemingly innocent questions while Jack was off guard. He had known that Jack and the Doctor had been close, and although he didn’t know much at all about the Doctor, he still knew the Doctor’s reputation. He knew that there had been a girl, Rose. Although he never got the feeling that there was any jealousy between the two men. Ianto had also known that Jack couldn’t die, even before Gwen joined the team. He knew that every few months, Jack committed suicide. He was always the one to clean up, and he always accepted Jack’s excuses. It started when he walked into to find his boss asleep in bed. He had needed to ask Jack something about the Hub, but when he hadn’t been able to wake Jack he had realized that Jack wasn’t breathing and had no pulse. That was when he noticed the empty bottle of pills that was grasped loosely in Jack’s outstretched hand. Before he could piece anything together, Jack had sat up and ordered him out saying he needed some sleep. Then there was the time when Jack “fell” off the top of the Torchwood building, with no broken bones. Or “accidentally” got run over by a car. And a “mistake” caused his gun to discharge into his temple, or for him to get his neck caught in a noose.

And Gwen, Gwen finally saw why Jack had asked her to join his team. She wasn’t a replacement for Suzie; she was a replacement for Rose. She fulfilled the same role, with her guilty conscience, her naiveté, and her openness. She was the one he didn’t push away when Estelle died. It was her look of disgust that had hurt him when he had let the child go. It was her approval, her…acceptance that he sought in place of Rose’s. Yet, she wasn’t sure if she had given it to him.

When Jack finally pulled away he still felt the Doctor on his lips, mixed with his own salty tears. Even with the new Doctor, the new experiences, the new lips, it was still the exact same feeling he remembered. And for that instance, he felt more alive than he had since he had died at the hands of the Daleks.

When the Doctor felt Jack pull back, he was relived. The kiss had not been bad, or even entirely unwelcome. After all, it was not everyday he was reunited with dead companions. But it had felt wrong, so completely wrong. It felt like kissing a stranger, and the Doctor had to remind himself that this was Jack. But he remembered what the girl, Gwen, had said when Jack had died. That “the Jack I know is not the same man you knew.” And he realized that she was right. He could see it in Jack’s eyes, a feral gleam that had replaced his glint of humor. His eyes appraised the room, searching for lurking danger, not studying the anatomy of the bodies in the room. His mouth had lost its ever-present smile, the slight upwards quick of the lips. Instead it was replaced with a ghost of a snarl, and the effect was unsettling.

He searched Jack’s face, desperate to find something familiar amongst the cold, calculating eyes, the harsh sneer, and the barely controlled rage that simmered below the surface. Jack stared back at him, searching his face in return. It was ironic, Jack thought, that even with all the different features, the hair, the ears, he would have recognized the aged wisdom in the Doctor’s eyes anywhere. So there stood two men, one with a changed appearance but the same soul, the other with the same appearance but a changed soul.

“I can’t live forever.” It was a statement, not a question.

“No one can.” The Doctor replied, and he meant it. He had lived for over 900 years, and sometime the only thought that kept him going was that one-day, someday, he would finally be able to rest. If he hadn’t had that comfort... well his life would have turned out very differently.

“What would you like me to do, Jack? Do you want me to stay? I could you know…I could keep you company, help you save the world. Maybe it is time for me to settle down somewhere. Maybe I have been avoiding the past.” The Doctor mused.

“The Doctor…settling down? It seems wrong that you would wait until now. And you know she wouldn’t have wanted you to. No Doctor, you have to keep moving, just as I have to keep living. Travel amongst the stars, dart through danger, but please Doctor, remember me. And you come up for a way to kill me…to end my undesired immortality, I will be here waiting.” And there came softness now to Jack’s face, as he uttered those words. The feral ferocity fled his features, and was replaced by a shimmering peace that was emanated from his countenance. The Doctor and Jack quietly walked down the hall, towards the T.A.R.D.I.S. They entered, and kissed and for a moment the Doctor thought he could detect a lingering trace of the old Jack in the kiss. But Jack pulled away, and so did the Doctor, and on a bittersweet note Jack departed the T.A.R.D.I.S. But Jack knew that the Doctor would be back, sooner or later, with or without his murder weapon.

He walked away, listening to the sounds of the T.A.R.D.I.S. disappear into the air. He entered the room where his team was waiting for him, with questioning glances, and lowered eyes. Jack sat himself down heavily upon a chair, and everyone else took a seat. With a long sigh, Jack started to speak.

“That was the greatest man you will ever meet. He saved my life. But he also killed me inside. You see, we both loved a girl named Rose. And she would have been the greatest woman you would ever meet. I met them both during the Blitz, she was hanging from a barrage balloon and he switched my blaster with a banana. And then…”