Pains Of Unanswered Prayers

Author's Note: If I have any readers out there I am very sorry for the long wait. I truly am.

Chapter Title: Lachrymose

Disclaimer: Last disclaimer for this story. I own nothing that was in the original Harry Potter stories.

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Ron sighed as he walked down the steps to breakfast with Harry and Neville. It'd been two weeks since Ron had kissed Harry in Hogsmeade, and although Harry had tried to be understanding and was still being as friendly as ever to Ron, there was a tension between them that Ron was sure only they could sense. He knew he made Harry incredibly uncomfortable and he hadn't wanted to; he wanted him and Harry to remain friends no matter what. He hadn't wanted Harry to ever know he was in love with him, but when he was arguing with Harry in the shop it seemed as if his brain had gone on hiatus, and he just wanted Harry to understand why things were different.

“Ron, are you alive in there,” Neville's voice suddenly broke through his thoughts and he mentally shook himself.

“Yeah,” he said with a half smile. “I'm just thinking, sorry.”

Neville nodded and they finished their trek down the stairs. It was amazing to him that Neville had suddenly become his closest friend. In all his years at Hogwarts, the last person he'd ever imagined he'd share his secrets with was Neville. He guessed that in his first few years he sort of ignored Neville, being so wrapped up in everything he'd been doing with Harry and their gang of friends. Neville's acceptance of him last year had opened his eyes to how everyone treated Neville as if he were invisible, and when Neville admitted he was gay, Ron couldn't help but feel strangely happy about the situation. He knew he was no longer alone; he had a friend who would actually understand how he felt.

He sat down at the table in the Great Hall and laid his head down at the table as Hermione and Trey walked in together. They sickened him sometimes. In their forth year, they'd been unofficially recognized as the cutest couple. Ron had a feeling it was mostly because of Trey that this happened. Trey was loved by everyone at the school. Especially after third year when his dad taught Defense Against The Dark Arts. Anyways, Trey and Hermione had started dating during their third year and had been dating ever since. It made no sense to him that Trey and Hermione was the school's cutest couple since Emily and Harry had been dating since second year. He had a huge feeling that no one wanted to vote a Snape for anything good.

“Hello,” Hermione said sitting down beside him happily.

“Feeling better?” he asked her and she nodded.

Hermione had spent the last two weeks in the infirmary sick and they'd all be worried about her. Trey especially, even though he showed it in a very odd way. He'd gotten weird without Hermione being around. It was as if his brain had gone and disappeared on him. Trey still remembered the comment about his pants making him look small. He couldn't help but laugh at that. It was definitely not something Trey would say, perhaps Ethan. Ethan was Emily's older brother. He'd graduated from Hogwarts in their forth year.

“Yeah, it was really weird,” Hermione elaborated. “Madame Pomfrey thinks I was on the receiving end of a jinx from one of the other students.”

“Oh lovely,” Neville said in surprised. “I'm glad your okay.”

“Thanks Neville,” Hermione said with a sweet smile as Trey wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

Hermione laid her head on his shoulder and Ron felt like choking on the sweetness. He had no idea why, but the sight of someone being in a happy relationship bugged him. He had a feeling it was because he knew now that he wouldn't ever be in a relationship with the person he'd been in love with since first year. He assumed it was first year. He never gave much thought to the time when he actually developed his feelings for Harry. He just assumed they'd always been there.

He looked up in time to see Harry turn to him with a smile on his face and he had to force himself to calm down. Even though Harry knew Ron had feelings for him, it didn't mean he would be okay with Ron acting weird around him just because he was hot when he smiled.

“So, what'd you do at Hogsmeade?” Hermione asked Harry and Ron tried not to choke as he took a drink of his orange juice.

Dammit, dammit, dammit, please Harry, don't tell her, Ron begged silently sending a panicked look to Neville who nodded and turned to Harry.

“Umm, well,” Harry said rubbing the back of his neck. “It wasn't to great, only, Em is pregnant.”

Hermione's eyes widened and Ron sent up a silent prayer of thanks to whatever deity was out there. Eve though he screwed up and told Harry how he felt, he did not want anyone besides the people who were there to know what happened. He wasn't ready for everyone to find out yet. He knew how people reacted to gays, and he was not ready for the hatred he knew he would experience.

“Are you serious?” she asked in surprise.

Harry nodded and Hermione stared at him in shocked. Ron could almost see the gears in her head stop turning. He knew she was having a hard time processing the idea of Harry being a father. Ron saw her give a jerky nod and then she turned to him.

“What about you?”

“Um, well I hung out with Harry for a while and then I went to the Three Broomsticks with Neville while Harry and Em talked,” he said quickly and she nodded.

He was glad she was too shocked to question his nervousness. Any other day she would have prodded him to find out why he was freaking out.

After breakfast they slowly trudged their way towards classes. Ron was definitely not in the mood to be in school. Then again, he'd been like that since the weekend at Hogsmeade.

--

Emily sighed as she walked out of the rooms Dumbledore had given her parents when her dad had started teaching at Hogwarts. When a teacher at Hogwarts started teaching, they were given a group of rooms that functioned as bedrooms, a bathroom, a common room or family room, and a kitchen. Her parents had gotten one in the dungeons close to her father's office near the potions room.

She looked at her watch and started to sprint down the hallway. She knew she was going to be late for class and the last thing she wanted was that new potions teacher getting on her class. She couldn't stand the man. Her father had been a much better potions teacher than that man would ever be. At least her father knew what he was doing.

She ran as fast as she could to the dungeons and opened the doors just as the bell rang. Slughorn promptly took five points from Slytherin and she rolled her eyes as she sat down next to Harry. She couldn't help it if morning sickness kept her from leaving her parents rooms as early as she usually did. She smiled at Harry's worried look and put her hand on his to let him know she was okay.

She laid her head down on the desk as Slughorn gave the class some ridiculously easy task. She knew she had an unfair advantage over the rest of the class, but she couldn't help it if her father had been teaching her to make these potions since she was a little kid. Nor could she help that she'd always had a natural talent for them. It ran in the blood.

Near the end of the class Emily quickly finished te work Slughorn had them do and laid her head on Harry's shoulder as he finished. She wished he would let her help him with the potions instead of reading the book Slughorn had given him. She knew it just as well as that book did, and she was certain that whoever wrote the notes in the book wasn't worrying about some of the side effects the tricks they were using could have had if any of them had gone wrong.

When the bell rang her and Harry walked out hand in hand while Ron walked out slowly behind them. She didn't know what to say to Ron. The thought of him being gay didn't really bug her, but the image of him kissing Harry etched itself in her brain. She knew he loved Harry, but she didn't know how to handle it. She knew it probably hurt Ron to see them together, but she loved Harry as much as Ron did, and Harry loved her. She couldn't hide that from anyone.

“How are you feeling,” Harry asked her.

“Tired, but other than that, I'm okay,” she said smiling. “Hey Ron, get your butt up here, I have something funny I keep forgetting to tell you.”

“Hmm?” he asked walking up.

“I heard my mom the other night. Apparently she walked in on you kissing someone, and she had nightmares about it,” she said putting her arm around his shoulder.

“What?” he asked as his face turned red.

“Yeah, I don't who it was or when, but it gave her nightmares, I thought it might make you laugh,” she said but paused at the look on Ron's face.

She had meant to make him laugh, but the look on his face was far from amused. She hadn't meant to hurt his feelings, she really hadn't.

“Ron, oh shit, I'm sorry,” she said softly stopping to look at him. “My mom's not like that really she isn't. She just has weird dreams sometimes.”

Ron nodded and Emily felt her heart break for him. She kept forgetting that with Ron being gay, the idea of someone reacting like that to him kissing someone was no longer amusing, no longer a joke. It was something completely different. Although he was in love with her boyfriend, Ron was her friend, and it hurt her to think that someone would hate him because he was in love with another boy.

“It's okay Emily,” he said softly and Emily bit her lip.

She had never seen or heard Ron sound so dejected.

“Are you sure,” she asked.

“Yeah, it's fine. I'll be okay,” he said and walked off.

Emily turned to Harry who was watching Ron walk off wide eyed.

“He was pretty messed up,” Harry said softly.

Emily nodded and looked down at the ground. She couldn't help but feel like it was her fault that Ron was feeling the way he was. If she hadn't opened her big mouth about her mom's dream, Ron would at least still be walking with them and she could have cheered her up another way. She sighed as she heard Hermione and Trey hurry up to them and turned.

“Where's Ron?” Hermione asked confused looking at them.

“He wasn't feeling good,” Harry said quickly and Emily looked at him.

Harry was apparently covering for Ron for now and she was glad. It would be hard on Ron when everyone found out it was gay, it should be at a time when he wasn't so upset about Harry.

“Oh, well, I hope he gets better,” Hermione said softly and Emily looked at her.

Hermione was acting a little strangely. Usually when Trey was around she was leaning on him and talking with him, but she hadn't been like that since she got out the infirmary. She seemed a lot more interested in everyone else for once. It was actually kind of nerve wracking.

“He will,” Harry said with a smile. “He's probably just tired.”

Hermione and Trey nodded and they waked down the hall with Emily and Harry. Emily bit her lip once again as she looked at the staircase Ron ran up as they walked past it. She couldn't help but wonder if Ron was really okay. She was rather worried about him, and how he was handling things. She hoped that he would be better soon. She didn't like the depressed Ron. It was too weird. She was much too used to the angry Ron.

End Chapter.

Lachrymose: Mournful. Fits Ron perfectly doesn't it?

An. I hope you guys liked. I think it was the best chapter I wrote for this story. Not much Dialog though.