Chapter 27

Epilogue 3 – Addison stays with Alex

A/N: I’m the type of writer that usually comes into a show, picks a ‘ship’ and sticks with the ship until the bitter end of the show. However, with Grey’s I was first drawn into Addek, then disgusted by Derek and drawn into Addex. I think it all fell on Kate Walsh’s shoulders who mastered the art of flawed yet unloved Addison Montgomery. So this epilogue wasn’t so hard to write because they grew on me due to the fact they actually had a real chance.

Epilogue 3 – Addison and Alex

When he opened the door he instinctively knew what the next words out of her mouth would be, “It was over,” a part of him hoped that he was hallucinating and that this wasn’t happening but as she asked to come in he knew that wasn’t the case. Alex looked at the woman in front of him with a mixture of emotions, love flowing over him more than anything but fear was coming up a quick second as he decided to allow his future be decided on this conversation.

“Addison, I know why you’re here and I’ll make it easy on you. I get it, he’s your past and there are parts of your past that you can’t let go of and I was crazy to expect you to I just thought….” As Alex stumbled for words Addison walked up to him and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips and asked for forgiveness, “You know that this was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever had to make? I’m just sorry it took so long, I’m not usually this indecisive when it comes to matters of the heart.”

Closing the door behind her Alex turned to the gorgeous woman in front of him who was showing him all of her vulnerabilities in hopes that it would help him understand the decision she had made that was going to tear apart his life, He tried to start again “Addison, I know what you’re going to say…” As his voice trailed off he noticed Addison ringing her hands together as she did when she was nervous and didn’t know where to begin.

She finally exhaled and set on the edge of his couch, “I decided for you.”

Alex stopped, shocked in the middle of the room, the words trapped in his throat as he looked at the woman in front of him and couldn’t assimilate what was being said, his voice was shaky as he spoke, “Can you repeat that please?” The grief at the idea of losing her was causing him to hallucinate he actually imagined that she wanted him, that she chose Alex Karev, screw-up over Derek Shepard, golden neurosurgeon and latest hero of Seattle Grace.

Addison looked down at her ringless fingers, “Since the moment I met you, I’ve started to live again. After loving and losing Derek Shepard I wondered if I would ever recover but then I met you and nothing else seem to matter. Everything became central to what I felt, what I wanted, what I needed because you made me your priority. I’ve never had that completely devotion and I must admit it scares me sometimes….it scares me because I don’t ever want to lose that and I don’t want to lose you so I guess what I’m bumbling badly to say is that Derek Shepard is a part of my past… A part that I can’t forget but when your love came at the moment that I least expected it, I didn’t handle it correctly and I want to apologize for that. I should’ve given you your place, instead of putting you on a yo-yo.”

Alex was usually a man that kept a firm grip on his emotions, he wasn’t the type of man that gave into the sentimentality that he noticed George have, he had always patterned himself after the Mark Sloan types of the world but meeting this woman, this wonderful woman had turned all of that inside out. He wanted to be sentimental for her; he wanted to be vulnerable with her. Crossing the room he lifted her in his arms and kissed her breathless, “I don’t want your apologies; I only want your love.”

Addison leaned back as she felt the tears well in her eyes, “I’m not perfect. Hell I’m Satan to some still but as imperfect as I am, I love you that is my truth. I can promise you that it won’t be easy we both have strong personalities but you get me in a way that I haven’t been privileged to experience in awhile.”

Nodding Alex pulled her in his arms and exhaled quickly not believing that this miracle was actually happening that the woman he loved was actually in his arms and vowing love and devotion to him for the rest of her life.

“And Derek?”

The breath that exhaled from Addison worried him for a moment but she spoke quickly, “I treated you horribly in respect to Derek but I needed to understand why we didn’t work out. I moved cross-country for this man that shut me out of his life and suddenly I was back in and I didn’t know how to handle it. I should’ve sent him to hell based upon his past actions alone and I don’t know if you’ll ever understand or hell even if I will but when someone’s that a big part of your past and you get past the forgiving, then comes the reconciliation. Not the reconciliation that you are thinking about but the reconciling in your mind and heart who they were to you, what they signified and where it left all of those emotions that were tied into all of those feelings. I will always love Derek Shepard for the years we shared together but not in that way anymore. I don’t have it in me anymore.”

Alex leaned forward and cradled her chin in his hand, “He was your husband for more than a decade Addison. Don’t get me wrong I’m almost delirious with happiness that you are here and that you want me. I still think this is a dream that I’m going to wake up from and realize that you are with Derek and I’m alone but I need you to be sure. I don’t think I could handle if two months down the line you come to me saying you made a mistake, I need this decision to be permanent and that means no going back on this….Tell me that Derek is no longer an issue for us.”

Addison felt the tears well in her eyes as she leaned forward, realizing what Alex needed and what he deserved to hear, “Derek was my husband for more than 10 years and we made some mistakes, some whoppers but when the time came to piece back our lives we were both at different places in our lives. I wanted to reconcile with my husband when I moved to Seattle, I put my life on hold for this man but he was too busy pining after Meredith Grey, don’t get me wrong this isn’t revenge I’m just at a different point in my life where I don’t want the same things as I did when I first came to Seattle.”

Alex wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into his arms sighing rested his chin on her shoulders and said, “I love you.”

Addison pulled back and with a gentle smile repeated the same words, “I love you too. I know that now there isn’t a conflict in my heart Alex. You are there, you are only there I just needed sometime to put Derek in the past where he belongs. You are my future, and from this moment on I want to create our world, where only you and I exist and anybody else doesn’t matter. From this moment, you are it for me.”

Reaching for her hand he led her upstairs to start planning their future together.