Credit for the inspiration of this story goes to HP Girl 28. Thanks for the idea!

This is a continuation of my ‘CATastrophe’ story.

I think I had too much fun with this.

Enjoy!

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Lance woke early the next morning. This wasn’t something he did often. It’s not like he normally woke around 5 in the morning. He groaned as he swatted at his face, trying to discover what was scraping against his eyelid. He opened an eye and saw a yellow one looking back at him. He sighed and tried to go back to sleep. He had to stop eating pizza before bed! He always had weird dreams.

As he tried to delve deeper into sleep, his ‘dream’ scraped against his face again and his reflexes took over. His hand shot out and grabbed the whatever-it-was and he held it in front of him.

It was a cat, or at least it looked like one. It stared back at him, the ears pointed backwards in a clear display of unhappiness and agitation at being treated so roughly. He stared. Why was it blue? Did it fall into a paint can or something?

He glanced at the clock, which told him it was currently 5:03 AM. He glared at the cat, shaking it and growling, “You stupid furball! I have no idea how you got in here, but you’re leaving right now!” He then got up, went to his door, opened it and dropped the cat on the floor in the hallway. It wasn’t the first time strays had wandered into their house, so he thought nothing more of it as he shut the door, locked it and went back to sleep, grumbling.

Ten minutes later, Lance heard a soft ‘bang’ and then an inquisitive ‘meow’. He opened one eye sleepily to see the cat looking at him again. He groaned, saying, “Ugh! Go AWAY, ya dumb cat!” The cat licked its paw and then looked at him pointedly, meowing loudly.

He then looked up. The door was closed and locked. How had the cat gotten in here again? For that matter, how had it gotten in here the first time?! He had the door locked every night and his window was shut too! He then sat up, looking at the cat more intently. It reminded him of something, but his brain was too fogged by sleep to figure it out.

He then rubbed his eyes and then felt a weight on his lap. He looked down and saw the cat standing on his thighs, looking indignant. He then asked, “What?” feeling stupid talking to a cat. The cat’s tail flicked and he saw a barb on the tip. He then felt a mental boot-to-the-head and muttered, “You’re just like Fuzzy!” The cat looked at him and meowed loudly again before jumping off his legs and going to the door, scratching at it. Lance stared and asked, “What? You wanna go out?” The cat sat on its haunches and began to wash its paw, all interest in the door gone.

Lance then crossed his arms, saying smugly, “I’m not getting out of bed again. You get out the way you came in!” The cat looked at him and seemed to glare before it stood up, tail high in the air in apparent disdain as it suddenly vanished with a soft bamf.

The rock mutant felt his lower jaw hit the floor.

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Lance then got up and went into Pietro’s room, shaking the speed demon awake. Pietro glared up at him, snarling, “Alvers! What are you doing?”

Lance then pointed out the door, saying, “We’ve got a cat in the house!”

The speed demon shrugged and rolled over, re-wrapping himself in his blankets, muttering, “So what? They’ve come in before.”

The older boy growled in frustration and tore the blankets off him, saying, “Not like this! Now get up and help me catch it!”

Pietro glared daggers at him for tearing away his warm covers (he was only in his PJ pants) and crossed his arms over his chest, asking, “And why should I?”

Lance then said, “It’s a mutant cat and you know how much scientists will pay to study something weird.”

Blue eyes looked at brown, one white eyebrow lifted. Pietro then snuggled down into the covers, saying, “Show me this cat, and I’ll consider it.”

The rock mutant growled and explained with greatly forced patience, “How can I show it to you when I can’t catch it?”

Pietro then smirked, asking, “And why can’t you catch a simple cat?”

Lance then explained, “It’s a Mini-Fuzzy! It can teleport!”

The silver-haired mutant’s mouth quirked in amusement as he said, “You’re kidding.”

There was a sudden bamf and sprawled on top of Pietro’s chest was the blue cat. It was curled up loosely, tail swishing back and forth gently, tickling Pietro slightly. The cat looked up at Lance, then down at the boy under it, making a soft “Meow?” before it licked Pietro’s bare skin. It cleaned a paw and then with another quiet ‘mew’, disappeared with a soft bamf.

Pietro stood up instantly, saying softly, “60-40, my favor.”

Lance grimaced, but they shook on it, saying, “Deal.”

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Todd and Freddy were out of the house (Todd was out pick pocketing and Freddy was out to eat) so Lance and Pietro had the cat all to themselves.

They walked carefully through the house and heard a soft purring noise. They followed it and found the cat lounging on Todd’s windowsill, licking a blue paw. Pietro then muttered, “Piece of cake.” and became a blur as he sped towards the feline.

The next few events were sudden and unexpected. For Lance all he saw was a flash of silver, a hiss, a yelp of pain and then a sprawled-on-the-floor-bleeding Pietro as a puff of smoke indicated the cat’s disappearance.

Slowed down, the action was this: Pietro had grabbed the cat by the scruff, hoping to subdue it. The cat, almost as if it had anticipated him, had turned instantly; hissing loudly as it sunk all four fangs deeply into the speed demon’s hand. Pietro let out a shrill yelp of pain and suddenly felt more pain on his face as the cat squirmed out of his grasp to attack his face before vanishing with a bamf.

Pietro felt his face, fingering the four cuts on his cheek from the cat’s last swipe and glared at Lance’s surprised, then sniggering face. Pietro stood up, muttering, “This may be harder than I thought.”

The two mutants then decided to split up to find the cat. Pietro said he’d stay in the top part of the house while Lance opted for the ground floor. Lance got lucky and found the cat in the kitchen, lapping at the faucet, which was leaking. He grinned as he walked slowly into the kitchen, saying, “Here, kitty, kitty… Come to papa…”

The cat looked up at him with a bored expression, as if it were saying, ‘You’ve got to be kidding.’ before going back to drinking. Lance, armed with a sheet from his bed, walked slowly forwards, and then at the last minute, jumped.

He covered the cat with the blanket, and quickly wrapped it up tightly; hearing it hiss and yowl and feeling it squirm like crazy. He grinned roughly, saying, “Ha! Stupid cat…” Suddenly his bundle went still. Lance, worried he had hurt the cat, and thus had decreased its market value, quickly opened the blanket to find it was empty. He was confused, but then heard a low growling from the counter right behind him. He turned around slowly to see the blue cat barely a foot away from him, hissing and puffed up in a way only a seriously PO’d cat can. Lance gulped and backed away from the obviously enraged feline, saying, “Um… n-nice kitty?” The cat yowled as it leapt.

Pietro, upstairs in the bathroom, heard Lance scream and zipped downstairs to find Lance writhing on the floor, the cat attacking him. It was hissing and screeching as it bit and scratched. Lance, meanwhile, was covering his face, crying out, “AHHH! Get it offa me! Help!” Pietro couldn’t help but laugh at the bizarre sight and then decided to save Lance. He came forwards, picked up the abandoned blanket and used his speed to wrap the cat up.

He held the bundle proudly at an arm’s length as Lance gasped for breath, saying, “See, Lance? That’s how you catch a cat.” But then the bundle got light and Pietro heard a growling behind him…

Ten minutes later, both boys scrambled from the kitchen, trying to escape the murderous feline, which leapt at their backs, hissing and yowling. They ran to the closet and closed themselves in, panting in the darkness. Pietro whimpered as he felt the numerous scratches on his face, muttering, “I hope these don’t scar…”

Lance was about to retort when they both heard scratching on the other side of the door, down at the base of it, about cat-height. They both went silent and soon the scratching stopped. Lance breathed a sigh of relief, saying, “I think it’s gone.” Suddenly there was a soft bamf, Pietro yelped and Lance turned to see two yellow, feline eyes in the darkness with them.

The closet door seemed to explode off it’s hinges as Lance burst out, bolting for the bathroom, while Pietro struggled with the angry cat, loosing a fight against a creature an eighth of his size.

Lance managed to get to the bathroom undetected and quickly crawled into the bathtub, arming himself with the showerhead, muttering, “Oh God, if I get out of this, I’ll be good and go to church and I’ll help out more and…”

Suddenly there was a whoosh and Pietro was suddenly in the tub with him, his shirt in tatters and he was shivering, muttering, “I hate cats…” Lance grimaced and soon enough, there were the soft footsteps of the cat as it slunk into the bathroom, puffed up and growling.

Lance held the showerhead out threateningly as he said, “Stay away, foul demon-cat from Hell!” Pietro spared the other mutant a glance before cowering at the cat’s replying hiss. Lance then reached behind him and turned on the water and the showerhead at the same time. He then aimed the resulting spray at the cat, which was instantly soaked. The cat screeched at the sudden drenching. Lance shut off the shower, glad to have won. But instead of fleeing, as Lance had hoped, it looked at the water dripping from it’s fur, looked at the showerhead, then at Lance who was holding it, and made the connection.

Lance muttered, “Oh no…” as the feline let out yet another screech and leaped.

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Todd returned home a few hours later, giddy at a score of over a hundred dollars. When he got inside the foster home, however, he stared. The furniture was all turned over, and sofa was ripped up in a few places. There were skid marks all over the kitchen floor and bits of cloth here and there. Todd heard a sudden crash from upstairs and hopped up the flight of steps to investigate. He found Lance and Pietro cowering at the end of the hall, Lance holding a trashcan lid and a broom while behind him, Pietro brandished a spatula. Both were scratched and bloody and their shirts were barely hanging on by threads. Threatening them was a strange blue cat, who was hissing loudly as it swatted at the tip of the broom Lance thrust at it, saying “Get away from us, you evil thing!”

From behind him, Pietro echoed, “EEEVIIIL!” and threw the spatula at the cat. It dodged out of the way and leapt. The boys split up, screaming and covering their heads, to hide in their rooms, the doors slamming shut with twin bangs. The cat paused outside of Pietro’s door and with a bamf, disappeared. There was silence, a loud ‘meow’ and suddenly the speed demon ran out of the room, the cat clinging viciously to his head, screaming bloody murder and, “OW!That-hurts!Get-it-off-get-it-off!”

Pietro ran into Lance’s room, and more screams and shouts commenced, this time coupled with breaking glass and furniture.

Todd crept to the doorway, staring. The cat had cornered the two boys and each were pushing at the other to be closer to the possessed feline. Suddenly though, the cat paused, ears perking up like it had heard something interesting. It leapt to the window and looked out and with a ‘meow’ and a bamf, vanished.

Wondering what had caused their sudden salvation, both boys hesitantly got up and looked out the window. Kurt, in hologram, was walking along the sidewalk, whistling and calling a name softly. The cat ran to him and purring, wound itself around his legs. Kurt smiled in surprise and reaching down, pet the cat, saying, “Gretel? Where have you been! I’ve been all over town trying to find you! What on earth are you doing out here? You had me worried sick!” The cat purred, arching up under his caresses and rolled to her back, pawing playfully upwards. Kurt grinned and picked up his cat, holding her close as he nuzzled her, crooning, “Oh, how can I stay mad at you?” He cuddled her under his chin, asking childishly, “Who’s such a good kitty?” He kissed the back of her head as she groomed the fur on his neck, making him giggle. He then held her on her back on his arms, like a baby, and kept walking, saying, “Come on, you, it’s time to go home.” He walked off, cuddling his cat, while she dozed off in his arms, tame and gentle as can be.

Lance and Pietro stared out the window, then slowly at each other. Todd hesitantly walked in, saying, “Do I even wanna ask?”

While Pietro’s eye began to twitch, Lance muttered, “No. You don’t.”

Todd shrugged and walked out, slightly unnerved by Pietro’s sudden shrill laughter.

FIN

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Hope it made you laugh!

Fear the cats!