The Diary of a Kunoichi

The attack caught them completely off guard. They were well within their own boundaries – though still days away from the village – and were returning from a peaceful mission, so they had relaxed. The four members of Team 7 had just sat down for their evening meal when they sensed the approach of unfamiliar chakra.

Naruto swore loudly and angrily; he had been looking forward to eating for the past eight hours, but just when he was about to take his first bite he was disturbed. Sighing heavily, the others stood up around a now raging Naruto and stood in their defense positions. Simultaneously, from all angles, shurikan and kunai sped out of the shadows. The four ninja waited until the very last possible moment before dodging the weapons, each disappearing in different directions.

It had been agreed, long ago, that if they should ever be split up on a mission, they would each make their way back to Konoha separately and rendezvous in the village square in five days. If, after five days, someone had yet to arrive, then the others would assume the worst and form a scouting party.

Speeding through the shadows, Sakura knew she was being tailed, but she didn’t know by how many. Deciding she was through with running, she quickly chose a spot where she could engage them and use the landscape to her advantage. Seconds after she stopped, six unidentified nin surrounded her.

“Lookee here, fellas. We got ourselves a pretty little kunoichi here. Maybe we should go easy on her?” One of his comrades chortled.

“Nah, man, I like it rough, and it’s even better if they scream. Let’s make her scream.”

Sakura steeled herself to keep her smirk from showing. These guys were complete idiots. Just the fact that she was a kunoichi of Leaf, one of the two strongest ninja villages in existence, should have clued them in that they didn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of winning against her. But at least she’d have fun taking them all down.

Crouching low, she grinned and beckoned them to her. The fight was on.

Elsewhere in the dense forest, Sasuke and Naruto were also fighting with their own groups of enemy ninja, and having a marvelous time. Their enemy was sadly lacking in skill and so, to alleviate the boredom caused by their previous mission, they toyed with them. When their humor died down, however, they quickly took care of their attackers and set off for the rendezvous point.

Going his own merry little way, Kakashi toyed with his attackers as well, almost ignoring them completely in favor of his little orange book. As he read page after page, he could sense the rising ire of his enemies and he fought to hold his chuckle. Ah, the young ones were so predictable: deny them your attention and they try harder to get it. That was a truth that couldn’t be denied.

As he blocked the attacks flying at him, Kakashi reached a really good part in the book and as he read it, his attention slipped a little bit, allowing the enemy nin an opening they were quick to take. In seconds, Kakashi’s little orange book lay shredded at his feet, and his attackers stood around him, gloating.

“You should pay closer attention, old man.” They all snickered.

Kakashi stood in front of the group, staring dumbly down at the tattered paper that used to be his beloved book. Slowly, he raised his head, his uncovered eye glaring. The time for fun was over. He was pleased to see they looked a little uneasy now that he was giving them his undivided attention.

“You will pay for that book,” he said, his voice low and hoarse. “With your lives!”

As he pulled a kunai from his holster, he simultaneously raised his headband, revealing his headband. One of his attackers gave a small squeal of fright and quickly placed himself behind the others. As Kakashi advanced on them, one step at a time, they retreated… one step at a time.

Normally, Kakashi would have enjoyed lengthening the fight, but his anger was too strong right now. They had destroyed his beloved Icha Icha and his mind had just registered that they’d called him old. With a few quick moves, those who had dared cross the great Copy Nin lay decimated at his feet.

Taking a deep, calming breath, Kakashi glanced around and realized he was quite alone. His team had split up and he knew they’d be taking separate routes to the rendezvous point. If he wanted to make it back in the allotted time, he knew he’d have to head out soon. First, though, he wanted to go back to the camp and see if there was anything left of value that hadn’t been destroyed that he could take with him.

Kakashi sighed sadly as he surveyed the damage. The bedrolls were all torn up from the vast number of weapons that had been thrown earlier, and it seemed as if everything was destroyed, nothing left whole. Realizing he’d have to rely on his own imagination to carry him through the next few days, Kakashi shoved his hands into the pockets of his pants and turned to walk towards Konoha. And that was when he saw it.

A book.

It was mostly hidden under a rather rotund shrub, as if it had been thrown there, or stashed there by someone, but the bright red color of it caught his eye. He bent down to pick it up, and when he had it in his hand he recognized it. It was Sakura’s diary.

Knowing his life would end if he so much as opened the cover, Kakashi simply tucked the book into his vest and set off on his trail once again. He knew Sakura would very much want it back; he’d seen her writing in it every time she had a free moment. It was important to her, and so he would return it.

After about a half an hour of walking, Kakashi found himself a place to bed down for the night and promptly went to sleep. The next morning, as sun peaked over the treetops, Kakashi woke and continued on his way, keeping his eye open for any source of food and water.

He walked for most of the day in complete silence, but as the sun began to set, he began speaking to himself. He discussed with himself the progress his ex-students, now team members, had made in the years he’d known them. He lamented the loss of his cherished book. He argued with himself over a certain kunoichi.

As the sun set and darkness again fell upon him, Kakashi began getting irritated with himself. He couldn’t stand the nonsensical jibes his inner self kept making, and he knew he had to find something else to occupy his thoughts. He was still at least a day and a half away from Konoha and he didn’t think he’d be able to stay sane if he only had himself to talk to in that period of time.

As he settled down to sleep, he thought of ways to occupy his mind the next day, ignoring the object hidden in his vest, which seemed to become heavier with each step. The next morning he woke, slightly grumpy because he hadn’t been comfortable, and continued his journey.

Around noon, after he finished munching on some of the local vegetation, Kakashi leaned down to get a drink from a nearby stream. As he was dipping his gloved hand in the cool water, the book he carried fell out of his vest. He caught is just before it hit the clear liquid and silently thanked his reflexes; Sakura would not appreciate getting a water logged book full of smudgy thoughts.

He started to place the book back in his vest, but his subconscious stopped his hand. Here, in his hand, was something that would alleviate the extreme boredom he found himself trapped in. This book, which had been lying so innocently under a shrub, was the perfect thing to divert his attention as he traveled back to Konoha.

But he couldn’t. It wasn’t right. Sakura would kill him.

But how would she know?

Satisfied with his argument, slight though it was, Kakashi opened the book and continued on his way, admiring Sakura’s elegant handwriting as he read.

Today we were placed on our Genin teams and we met our team leaders. First let me talk about my team. I am teamed up with Sasuke! If I could squeal on paper, I would. I’m so excited. This is the perfect chance for me to grab his attention and show him how I feel about him. Plus, I can rub it in Ino’s face that I get to spend day after day with the gorgeous Sasuke Uchiha. She’s already really angry with me. Take that, Ino. Only bad thing is, though, that I’m also teamed up with Naruto… What are the chances of just ignoring him?

Kakashi chuckled a little bit at her attitude. He remembered well the twelve year old kunoichi he’d met all those years ago. She had been completely obsessed with the uninterested Uchiha and had turned an amazing shade of red whenever he’d look at her. Kakashi thought it was quite comical for the first little while and then it grew to be a little predictable. He was glad when she grew out of that, or at least learned to hide it better.

I think we were all a little awed as the Jonin elites came in to collect their squads. They are impressive ninja and we get to spend our time with them. Just between you and me, I think Ino’s squad leader is kind of cute.

Kakashi thought hard for a moment before he realized she was talking about Asuma. Oh, what a delightful bit of news. It would come in handy for blackmailing Sakura should he ever need to do so. A slow grin spread across his face under his mask as he kept reading.

I kept myself attentive as I waited for our team leader. I wanted to make a good impression, you know. So I waited and waited; I smiled at every Jonin that looked at our odd little group. Some of them appeared to get a look of sympathy whenever they’d look at me. It had to be because of Naruto. That’s what I thought anyway.

I was wrong. They felt sorry for me because my squad leader was none other than the Elite Copy Nin. It sounds amazing, doesn’t it? Might have actually turned out that way, too, if he hadn’t been an hour late in meeting us and if he hadn’t told us right off that he really didn’t like us.

The man made us wait for an hour for him to show up then he wants us to go do an endurance test or whatever, a pass or fail exam. I suppose it makes sense because this way he’ll be able to gauge our skills. He was gruff and he acted like he had better things to do than teach us.

He told us we had to get a bell from him if we wanted to pass and continue on through the academy. Then, as we all got ready to launch our own attack on him, he whips out his stupid porno book and starts reading it, completely ignoring us.

He wasn’t as impressive as I’d hoped he be.

Kakashi huffed under his mask, slightly annoyed. Not impressive? Well, he’d show her impressive the next time he saw her because she clearly didn’t know what impressive was.

His jovial mood depleted somewhat, he continued reading for a bit until he realized the next few pages consisted of gushing about Sasuke and how he almost looked at her that one time, and how he talked to her (just to tell her to get out of his way, but still…) Kakashi flipped through the next several pages until he found a topic he thought he’d find interesting.

The first two tests of the Chunin exams have been completed. I thought I was strong enough to do this, but now I really don’t think so. The boys are always protecting me from something, and I’m always getting in the way. Because of me, Sasuke has been cursed by that horrible Sannin, Orochimaru. If I had declined taking the Chunin exams then perhaps Sasuke would be ok. If I had protected them, then perhaps Naruto wouldn’t have gotten hurt and Sasuke wouldn’t have been cursed.

They’re always protecting me; why didn’t I protect them?

Kakashi sucked in a breath. She blamed herself for what happened in the forest of death? Surely the stupid girl didn’t actually believe that any of that was her fault. She couldn’t be carrying around that guilt. Maybe that’s why she pushed herself so hard in her training after the Chunin exams, and after Sasuke had left. She felt guilty and so she worked to burn away her guilt as one (such as Naruto) would burn away energy. Once he got back to Konoha, Kakashi decided he’d have a little heart to heart chat with is favorite kunoichi.

After skipping a few more pages of Sakura gushing about Sasuke, Kakashi noticed Sakura’s style of writing changing slightly. As he read the entry, he found out why.

Sasuke left. He left just like Orochimaru said he would, to seek him out for more power. The guilt I felt during and after the Chunin exams came back full force. Why couldn’t I have protected him from Orochimaru? Why couldn’t I stop him from leaving Konoha? I’m a Leaf Kunoichi, damn it, trained by Kakashi. Why can’t I do anything?! Why am I so helpless?

Kakashi noticed that between this entry and the next one there was a huge gap in time, and he realized it was because she had been so depressed after Sasuke left and keeping up in her journal would have been one of the farthest things from her mind.

Years have passed since my last journal entry. That’s because I put it away and forgot about it after Sasuke left. I guess that maybe I wanted to forget about that time, and this journal would hold me back and make me stay as the same person I was back then. But now I realize, the little girl I was back then defines the woman I am now.

Sasuke’s back now, but I don’t think things between us will ever be the same. There is a light lack of trust I’m not sure how to get over. My heart still hurts, too, from when he broke it. We are once again a team, but things are strained at the moment.

Kakashi leaned down close to the fire to be able to read the words clearly. The sun had set nearly two hours ago, but he had been so engrossed in Sakura’s diary that he didn’t want to stop reading. But, as his eyelids dropped, he realized he’d have to get some sleep so he’d be rested for the rest of his journey. Maybe, though, he’d walk slower, or take the long way home, just so he’d have enough time to finish the compelling piece of literature that was now in his grasp.

Like the past couple of days, Kakashi rose with the sun, quickly finding nourishment and destroying any evidence that would allow him to be tracked. For the first little while, he walked along, content with his own thoughts. After a bit, though, his hands started itching to get a hold of the book, Sakura’s book, and he found he couldn’t fight the urge for very long.

Kakashi was extremely bored.

He’d thought about it while he ate his delicious breakfast of leaves and he decided that it was so horribly wrong of him to read his teammate’s journal. Those words written there on those pages were her personal thoughts and feelings. Her soul was in the book. He had no right to read it.

But he couldn’t help himself. If he didn’t read something, he thought he’d go insane. It was a fairly interesting little book, too. It taught him a little bit about the way her mind worked. As he read throughout the day, he started noticing that his name was being mentioned more and more. At first, he thought the tone she used was derisive, but after awhile, she dropped the ‘-sensei’ from the end of his name and her tone changed.

One particular passage stopped him dead in his tracks and he stared dumbly at the pages.

Team 7, consisting – this time – of only Naruto, myself and Kakashi, (Sasuke is away with another squad right now) returned today from a grueling mission. We were sent on an information trade deep into the heart of the water country, and it was rough. My hair was flat the entire time because it was always raining. It was more difficult to fight there, too, with all the rain, and we were attacked quite often. The mission was A-ranked, so I know the information we swapped is extremely important.

As usual, after a tough mission, Naruto nags me to meet him and Kakashi at the local pub. Before that, though, Ino drags me to the bathhouse to relax. You can actually learn a lot in a bathhouse, if you just listen. Most times Anko and Kurenai are there, along with some of the other Jonin women, and they like to gossip. I know quite a few things about some of the men in the village that I’m sure they’d not like anyone else to know.

Kakashi was extremely interested to know what information she had on who. Anything he could use as blackmail, on anyone, would be extremely useful. He chuckled a bit as the thought of all the targets of Anko and Kurenai and he was sure he knew many of them.

Their topic today, however, was Kakashi. As soon as I heard his name, I felt my body stiffen. I sunk down low in the water, but I could still feel the blush that crept up my skin. Why does his name do that to me? In the past few months, since I turned 21, I’ve noticed that the relationship between Kakashi and me has been changing.

When we aren’t on missions, we don’t usually spend a whole lot of time together. Naruto is usually busy training with Jirayia (if that man comes on to me one more time, I’m going to have to kill him), and I am busy at the hospital and with Tsunade. I didn’t want to get behind on my training, though, and since I knew Kakashi didn’t do much of anything besides read his nasty little books (yes, I know what’s in them because Jirayia took great pleasure in showing me), I asked him if he could find time to train with me.

As always, he said yes.

Kakashi snorted. “As if I could deny her anything,” he said aloud. The sound of his own voice startled him for a moment and he tensed up. Realizing he was still alone, he rolled his eyes and continued on his journey. He could see the walls of Konoha in the distance, and knew the other three were probably there waiting for him, but he found he didn’t want to get back yet. He wanted to read the rest of Sakura’s diary. When he came to a fork in the path, he ‘accidentally’ took a wrong turn on a path that lead him a little bit further away from Konoha. By taking this path, it would take him at least another day to return to the village, and that suited him just fine.

“Where in the hell is Kakashi?”

Sasuke and Naruto glanced at the fidgeting kunoichi, but said nothing. “I mean, really. Those ninja that attacked us were a joke! I know he would have easily defeated them, so why isn’t he back yet?”

“Why are you so worried?” Sasuke asked.

“Yeah, he can take care of himself,” Naruto interjected.

Sasuke turned to look away from the others. “He has three more days until he is supposed to be here, so don’t worry about it. He probably wants some personal time away from you two.”

“Wha – HEY!” Naruto yelled. Sakura rolled her eyes at the two. She knew Sasuke had only said that to get a rise out of Naruto. Shifting her gaze from her two comrades, she glanced at the gate.

‘Where are you, Kakashi?’ she wondered, slightly worried that he hadn’t arrived yet.

Kakashi never blushed. Ever. He never had anything to be embarrassed about. He read erotic literature in public, and if that didn’t cause some sort of embarrassment, then nothing would. But he was blushing now. In all his years of reading the Icha Icha books, he’d never reacted to them quite the way he was reacting to Sakura’s words.

I trained again with Kakashi today. I’m starting to look forward to these sparring sessions for a different reason than the one I started out with. At first I wanted to keep training and become stronger, I guess to prove myself. I still want that, but now… I don’t know. I guess I just want to be around Kakashi. He’s been the only constant in my life since I was 12 years old. Naruto went with Jiraiya and then, for a time, Sasuke went with Orochimaru. I was left behind again, but Kakashi was here.

I think, since we started training with just the two of us, we’ve become closer. I tell him things I’m sure I wouldn’t tell Naruto and certainly not Sasuke (I realize now that Sasuke doesn’t even care what I do or what I have to say). Sometimes, after training, we’ll sit and talk. I think he’s told me things about himself that no one else knows, or is likely to ever know. In a way, I guess I’ve gone beyond the boys, haven’t I?

Lately, though, I’ve noticed this feeling in my chest whenever I see Kakashi. It’s like someone is sitting on my chest and it’s hard for my heart to beat and for my lungs to breathe. My palms get kind of sweaty and my hands tremble. When we train, I get very distracted by the fluid beauty of his body. He’s so toned and fit it almost makes me drool. If I’m hiding in the trees, watching him search for me, I’ll get the sudden urge to just run my hands all over his body.

Kakashi’s slight blush blossomed into a bright red. He had no idea Sakura harbored such thoughts about him. Not that it was necessarily a bad thing; she was a very good looking young woman now, after all, and a guy can’t complain when a beautiful woman wants to run her hands all over his body.

Damn it! Thoughts like that were bad! There was a line there that could not ever be crossed. She was his student, and he’d known her since she was just a child. Shouldn’t he think of her as a daughter or a sister or something?

I asked Ino about it, making it seem like a hypothetical situation between a certain girl and guy – I didn’t let her know I was asking about me and Kakashi. She’d tell everyone she knew and then I’d be humiliated. Me and a Jonin elite? It’s laughable.

Ino told me that the pressure the girl felt in her chest was because she had feelings for the guy, feelings that went beyond friendship. My world crashed. The last time I had feelings for a guy, my heart was destroyed. My heart always chooses the ones that are so completely out of my reach.

I may not be able to continue training with Kakashi, or even be on the same team as him. I’m so distracted when I’m around him, I’m sure I’d mess something up. I’ll have to think on it for a few days and then see what I’m going to do. We’re leaving for a mission the day after tomorrow – all of the original Team 7 – so I’ll figure my situation out then.

It’s funny, though. I can’t recall Sasuke distracting me as much in a week as Kakashi manages to do in an hour. What could that mean?

Kakashi snorted. “That means I’m a man, not a boy.” Wait, what? The words Sakura had written had finally penetrated his brain. She was thinking about leaving their team? Well… no. He wouldn’t let that happen. The four of them worked so well together, and, well, damn it, he liked things the way they were. He didn’t want her to leave. Ever.

The sun was starting to set, and again, Kakashi made camp. There wasn’t much left to read – just Sakura’s entries from the last couple of days that they’d been on their mission – and he knew he’d be returning to Konoha sometime tomorrow. Settling down by his small fire, he continued his reading.

We’ve started a new mission today. It’s kind of nice to be on the original Team 7 again. We’re going on an escort mission, and it shouldn’t last for more than a week. I will have to decide whether or not to stay on the team by the time we get back to Konoha.

I’ve kept my distance from Kakashi since we started this journey, and pretty much ignored him. I don’t think he’s noticed, though. Naruto did, and asked me if anything was wrong, and why I was being so quiet. Sasuke didn’t say a word, but I could tell he wanted to hear my answer, too. They’re such good guys, always looking after me. I really do love them.

But I couldn’t tell them about my situation with Kakashi. Naruto, being the idiot he truly is, would probably blab it to Kakashi and demand he fix my problem. Plus, I just don’t want them to know. It’s a phase, that’s all. I’ll get over it.

Maybe I just need to get laid. Oh, my God, I sound like Ino.

We’ve made camp and it’s my turn for watch. I’m sure Kakashi would be thrilled to know I’m writing in this diary rather than paying attention to our surroundings. But, I don’t really think anything will happen. We haven’t seen so much as a chipmunk since we started this damn journey this morning.

He looks so peaceful when he’s sleeping. This seems to be the only time he’s relaxed and he lets the world fade away. Now would probably be the best time to try to see what’s under his mask, but he’s an extremely light sleeper. Maybe I could come up with a good excuse?

‘Sorry, Kakashi. I just wanted to kiss you so bad!’ And it wouldn’t be a lie.

I should have Naruto try that one! I know he would!

Kakashi snorted. He knew very well that Naruto would try to use that excuse if Sakura told him it would work. Of course, Naruto would end up unconscious. Sakura, on the other hand… he would gladly show her his face.

Realizing his light was dying, and feeling too lazy to reach out and find some more firewood (resting in a haphazard pile two feet to his left), Kakashi put Sakura’s diary away, safe within the confines of his vest, and drifted off to sleep. The next morning, he woke up early and quickly cleaned his campsite, leaving no trace that he was even there.

After about ten minutes of walking, Kakashi reached into his vest and grabbed the spine of his current obsession. Pulling it out, he effortlessly flipped it open and continued his reading.

We’ve reached our destination and have been briefed on the situation. I can’t believe Tsunade actually recommended us for this mission. It’s absurd! Four elite Jonin sent on a three-day journey, to escort a perverted, egotistical guy to his own wedding.

Let me tell you this: he may not make it. If he touches me one more time, I’m going to have to kill him. Kakashi and the boys left to go scout the area, and I was left alone guarding our ‘target’. The second everyone was out of earshot he grabbed me and pressed me up against the nearest tree. He held my hands apart so I couldn’t form any hand seals. He held me in such a way that I couldn’t get any leverage to push him away.

I felt so weak; I couldn’t get him off of me. He kept pressing his slimy lips to my skin and it was making me sick. What kind of kunoichi am I?

Somehow, he became distracted, and I was able to free my hand and punch him away from me. Just as Kakashi and the others returned, I disappeared into the forest.

Kakashi had wondered why she had fled when they returned from scouting the area. He’d noticed their employer holding his nose, but didn’t make the connection in his mind. Now that he understood what had happened, he wanted to go back and find that little weasel and cause him some serious hurt. Scowling fiercely, he read on.

I think our client is a little bit thickheaded. The man will not leave me alone. He’s going to his wedding, but he’s constantly trying to touch me! The bride may be without a bridegroom on the day of her wedding.

I guess Sasuke finally noticed the unwanted advances the guy was making towards me and decided to walk next to me. I’ve never seen him give such a frigid stare to anyone before. It was highly amusing. Our client has finally left me alone, though.

But Sasuke stays by my side, keeping him away. I know it’s absurd, but I can’t help but think that maybe he’s jealous? Oh, if only I were twelve again and cared for him that way. If only he hadn’t waited too long. My heart would be thrilled. But now my heart beats for no one.

Except Kakashi. Damn that man. Why the hell does he have to be the subject of every woman’s fantasy, and why do they have to talk about it in the bathhouse? And why do I want him so much?

“How in the hell is that my fault?” he asked indignantly to no one in particular.

I can’t look at him without picturing him in the various poses Anko and Kurenai described from their fantasies. And when I do that, I lose all coherent thought, because… come on, the man is an Adonis! And that makes me a liability on these missions.

I haven’t decided yet on my course of action concerning these feelings I have for Kakashi. Part of me is hoping it is just a phase and that it will blow over, maybe if I have a one-night stand or something. But another part of me wants this to be the real deal. Part of me wants to be in love with Kakashi, so I can know what real love is before I lose all my chances of having it.

But that’s just silly nonsense. He would have to love me back for that to work, and I’m pretty certain he doesn’t. I think the farthest his feelings go towards me are that of leader and subordinate. He acknowledges me as a teammate and a fellow Jonin, but as nothing else.

“Oh, Sakura, how wrong you are.” Kakashi felt much more than he thought he should towards his only female student. He had noticed her grow from the lanky little girl to the beautiful woman she was today. He was extremely proud of her when she passed her Jonin exams, and he had deep feelings for her, which he kept hidden.

Once Sasuke left to go after Itachi, and Naruto stayed with Jiraiya, the only one he’d ever see on a regular basis was Sakura. They’d talk sometimes when they’d meet on the street, or if they happened to be in the same restaurant. And then she’d ask him if he’d train with her and spar with her. He didn’t deny her request because he couldn’t; he’d do anything in his power for her.

As their sparring sessions progressed, Sakura wasn’t the only one to notice the changes in the way they behaved toward each other. She was now his confidante, his friend. He could see – clearly – the changes in her whenever she was around him; he just didn’t want to read into them and give himself hope that maybe, just maybe, he’d found that one thing he’d been missing his entire life. It got to the point where he ached to see her; it was borderline obsession to be in her presence.

What Kakashi didn’t know was the extent of her feelings and her thoughts. If he’d known, for even a second, that she’d been thinking about leaving the team, he would have talked to her about it and figured something out. If necessary, he thought he’d even reject her, just to be able to stay near her.

His illogical thinking was giving him a headache. Throughout the day he kept walking, occasionally reading a few lines from her diary, completely floored at the fact that his feelings were actually reciprocated, though unknown. Should he tell her? How would that change things between them? And what about the Uchiha? She said she was over him, but was she really? Would she be willing to release her heart? So many questions ran through his mind, but no answers. He knew that once he made it back to Konoha, he and Sakura were going to have a very lengthy talk.

Finally, oh praise the gods, we have dropped our client off at his destination. I am so relieved. He tried his shenanigans one more time when the guys went to scout again, but I was a little more prepared this time, plus Sasuke came back early. But don’t tell Kakashi! I don’t think he’d be too pleased about Sasuke not finishing his rounds.

Kakashi snorted his agreement with her statement, but kept reading.

I had just pushed the guy away from me when Sasuke came barreling through the underbrush, Sharingan blazing and the Chidori lighting up his hand. He was absolutely livid; it was such an awesome sight. The client nearly pissed his pants, but settled for passing out when Sasuke was a few feet away from him.

When the client was down and out cold, Sasuke smirked at him then turned to me. He asked me if I was ok. Damn it, doesn’t he think I can take care of myself, especially against one socially retarded moron? I glared at him and said that I was fine. And then he did the strangest thing.

He grabbed my arms and he kissed me! Not just a peck on the lips either. This was a full out, mouth-open, tongue-clashing kiss.

Kakashi tensed. Sasuke had kissed her? What the hell? The boy had ignored her for the better part of their lives and suddenly he decides he wants her? Was that it? Jealousy began to creep up his spine, but was quickly replaced by smugness at her next words.

And it did absolutely nothing for me. I didn’t feel anything when he pulled away. My heart wasn’t racing and I wasn’t lightheaded. He looked me in the eye and I gave him a small smile. He nodded sadly and pulled me to him for a tight hug before walking away. I think he understands that we can’t be any more than what we already are. And what we are is just close friends, like siblings.

I feel sorry for him. I was the one girl he knew the best; the one he thought was for him. Too bad he didn’t feel that way when we were younger. I would have welcomed him with opened arms. But now my heart lies elsewhere.

If Kakashi had kissed me like that, I doubt very much I’d even be able to stand on my own. Oh, what have I done? Why have I allowed my heart to choose him? It’s too late to do anything about it now. I’ll just have to ignore it and hope nobody catches me staring at him.

On a side note, I’ve decided to leave the team. I can’t concentrate around Kakashi, anymore. More than once on this past mission, I caused some sort of disturbance simply because I wasn’t paying attention to anything but him. I am a Leaf kunoichi, and as such, I must stay clear-headed at all times so my team can count on me.

Once I get back to Konoha, I will be asking for a transfer.

Kakashi stopped in his tracks. She’d decided to leave. Well, he just wouldn’t allow it. But, she was most likely already back in Konoha, and perhaps the paperwork was already going through! Snapping the book shut, Kakashi gathered chakra in his feet and took off at full speed for the gates of Konoha.

“Come on, Sakura, you can’t be surprised. This is Kakashi we’re talking about.” Sasuke kept his eyes closed as she paced back and forth. “The man never hurries for anything.”

Sakura ignored him and kept pacing.

“Why are you so worried, Sakura?” Naruto asked. “He’s an elite; he can take care of himself.” Naruto glanced at Sasuke and then back at Sakura. “Come on, Sakura. Why are you so worried?”

Sakura paused her pacing for a split second before continuing. ‘Nah, they don’t know anything,’ she thought. ‘They can’t know. And I’m not worried, really. I just want him to be here, where I know he’s ok.’

Sasuke cracked open an eye. “I noticed you staring at him quite often on our return journey. Is that why you rejected me? Because you’re in love with him?”

Sakura froze. Sasuke, both eyes now open, sat up and looked at her. Naruto swiveled his head from Sakura to Sasuke and back.

“Staring? Rejected? Love?” He furrowed his brows trying to make the connections.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sakura said after a few minutes, still facing away from them. With a shake of her head, she started pacing again. Sasuke was on his feet in an instant, moving to block her path and glare down into her face.

“That’s bullshit, Sakura. Why else would you have pushed me away?” He angrily grabbed her arms. “Was your love not good enough to last, Sakura? Should I warn Kakashi that you will find someone new after a few years?”

Naruto still sat on the ground, staring wide-eyed at his two best friends. He shrugged helplessly at all the passersby who gave him questioning looks.

Sakura tried to break Sasuke’s grasp, but he wouldn’t let go, so she settled on yelling at him instead. “How dare you! You left, you betrayed us. And you gave no indication I was anything other than a pest to you. So I was just supposed to wait? Wait for someone I wasn’t even sure I was going to see again? Wait for someone I know doesn’t care about anyone?” Her arms moved just enough so she could poke him in the chest. “Kakashi was here; Kakashi stayed here. Kakashi cares.”

“You like KAKASHI-SENSEI?!?!” Naruto finally seemed to understand.

Struggling again, Sakura finally gained her release from Sasuke. She was so upset, she didn’t even notice that he wasn’t paying any attention to her anymore, but looking over her left shoulder. With her head down, Sakura turned away and tried to run away. Her way was blocked.

Sakura gasped when she ran into Kakashi. He grasped her arms to keep her from falling and when she realized just who was holding her, and how long he had probably been standing there, she fought to get away. She could feel herself blushing, and her knees trembling. Just being near the man made her into a pile of mush. She peeked up at him and found him staring at Sasuke, an almost challenging glint lighting his eye. She figured his attention was focused elsewhere and fought again to gain her release. Kakashi instantly looked down at her and she froze.

“Stop.” He shifted his gaze back to Sasuke. Sasuke glared for a moment before disappearing. Naruto still sat on the ground, as confused as ever.

Kakashi looked down at Sakura again, but she wasn’t looking at him. “We will talk now.” She didn’t acknowledge him, but he knew she heard him. With a friendly nod to Naruto, he dragged Sakura down the street.

Sakura couldn’t tell what sort of mood Kakashi was in, but she was sure she didn’t want to be around him right now. “I’m glad to see you made it back by the deadline. You still had a day and a half. I, uh, guess I’ll be going now! See ya!” Kakashi ignored her and continued to drag her towards a secluded copse of trees. He dragged her into the trees and released her. She immediately turned to face him.

“Listen, Kakashi, about what Sasuke said. He didn’t mean it; it was just a joke. You know, a not very funny joke.”

He still didn’t say a word.

“Look,” she said, becoming agitated. “Just forget it, ok? It didn’t mean anything.”

Kakashi slowly reached into his vest and pulled out a book. Sakura gasped when she realized that it was her diary. “Oh, thank you! I thought it was gone for…” she trailed off, staring at the book and then at Kakashi.

“You… read… my… diary!” Kakashi flinched with each word she bellowed, but didn’t deny her accusation. In an instant, Sakura recalled everything she had written in that diary. She looked up at Kakashi, uncertain.

“Ah, hah hah hah. Well, you know how girls are, Kakashi,” she said laughing nervously. “We just make up stuff that nobody would believe just in case someone does actually read our diaries.”

“Is that so?” It was the first time he’d spoken since he had returned. The sound of his voice caused her knees to start tremble. He took a step towards her. She didn’t move.

“Y-yes.”

“Hmm.” He kept moving forward until he was less than an inch away from her. He stared down at her; she stared at his chest. “Sakura?” He whispered her name. She looked up at him, slowly.

“Yeah?”

He wrapped one of his hands around the nape of her neck, simultaneously pulling down his mask with the other. With a gentle tug, he pulled her lips to his and proceeded to kiss the living hell out of her.

His kiss was sweet and gentle, pouring out all his emotions to her. She felt his love in the kiss and responded in kind. Relief filled her as she realized he was telling her he loved her, too. She fisted her hands in his vest and pulled him as close to her as she could.

The kiss slowly drew to an end and they drew apart, but they didn’t let go of each other. Hesitantly, Sakura looked up at Kakashi. He smiled down at her, his mask bunched underneath his chin.

“I didn’t even think to hope…” she said.

“Me neither.” A sudden thought struck him. “You haven’t been to see Tsunade since you returned, have you?”

She thought the question odd. “No, not yet. I was waiting for you.”

“You aren’t transferring.”

“What?”

He shook his head. “You are not transferring to another team.” He was adamant. She suddenly glared at him.

“You read my diary; you know why I have to.”

“No.”

“I’m a liability if I can’t concentrate, Kakashi! You know that!”

He hugged her to him again. “Please don’t. I don’t want you to leave.”

“Kakashi…”

“Think about it, Sakura. How often would we actually see each other if we were on separate teams? I just found you, so to speak; I just found the one thing I’ve been missing, and I don’t want to lose it.”

He could tell by the way she bit her lip that he’d won her over. But she still argued. “What about the boys?”

Kakashi shrugged. “What about them?” Sakura really didn’t know, but she felt she had to make the argument.

She nodded against his chest. “Ok. I’ll stay.”

He tilted her face up and captured her lips in another sweet kiss. They don’t know how long they stood there, hidden in the trees, holding each other, but when they did finally come out, they found Naruto in the exact same place they’d left him.

He squinted up at Kakashi and Sakura and smiled. “Hi, guys! Who wants ramen?”

That was a year ago, and Kakashi and I have been together since. We still go on missions together and, every once in awhile, something will go wrong because one of us wasn’t paying attention to what we were supposed to be doing. It all works out, though.

It took awhile for Sasuke to accept the relationship between me and Kakashi. I think he figured that, since I told him I loved him, I belonged to him. He realized that wasn’t the case and is now pursuing a relationship with Ino. I don’t know how it’ll turn out; it started out really rocky, with Sasuke complaining about Ino flirting all the time, and Ino calling Sasuke an emotionless freak. It was a very funny argument to watch, and they did make up… eventually. But they’re happy now, I can tell, despite all their arguments.

Honestly, I think they argue just so they can make up…

Naruto obviously felt left behind since he was the last single person on our team. In his usual brash and annoying way, he marched right up to Hinata’s front door and told her she was going to dinner with him. Neji was less than pleased with his forwardness and had a ‘talk’ with Naruto. But love heals all, and Naruto’s bruises faded rather quickly. He and Hinata are expecting their first child in a few months.

I’m going to be an aunt! I’m so excited!

Sakura smiled as she reread her last entry. So much had changed in the past year, but she wasn’t sorry for any of it. Everyone she loved dearly was happy, and she couldn’t ask for anything more. With a smile on her face, she moved to put the journal back on the shelf. Just as she lifted it, a piece of paper fell out. Frowning in confusion, Sakura reached down and picked it up, unfolding it.

Will you marry me?

The handwriting was not her own, but still very familiar. She pressed her hand to her mouth as the meaning of those four words sank in. Tears of joy filled her eyes and threatened to spill over.

“Well?” She whirled around to face the voice and found Kakashi leaning against the doorway to their shared bedroom. “Will you?”

“Really?” she squeaked.

He grinned and nodded. She ran to him and wrapped her arms around him. She tugged his mask down and pressed her lips to his.

When they drew apart he chuckled. “Is that a yes?”

“Yes, that is most definitely a yes.” She pulled him to her again and gave him the sweetest kiss he’d ever had.

They were married less than a month later, and lived to have lives full of happiness and love… and kids.

i A/N: This story may suck a little bit, but it’s not really a serious type story. It’s just something I did to kill the time while I tried to find the inspiration for all of my other stories. Please don’t judge me too harshly on this one (though I love it dearly). It’s just a bit of entertainment.

Sucky as it is, I hope you enjoy it!

haru