The Sunshine in You

Okay well we all knew that it took Jennifer Taylor a while to get to know the real Brain Kinney and understand really how he worked so I wrote this little fan fiction to tell maybe how it all could’ve happened. It’s more of a cancer story but with my own twist so I guess you would have to say it’s AU cause this is not how it happened on the show. I hope you like it. I write a little differently I took this stupid English course at a college so it maybe hard for folks to follow. So if you read and it’s hard to follow just drop a line and let me know and well I’ll just remove it or maybe someone could help me edit it to a more appropriate formatting. Thanks in advance…..Deadzonebiotch

The Sunshine in You

Jennifer Taylor sat quietly in her living room, it had been a slow day and she didn’t have to go and show any houses at this given time and Molly was away at a friends so she was just enjoying her quiet time. Justin was away at some art exhibit with Lindsay Peterson. She had really opened him up to a lot of possibilities including a young man by the name of Ethan Gold, but that didn’t last very long. She thought he was perfect for her son but he went back to Brian Kinney. What could she say about Brian, she would be lying if she would say that he didn’t love her son because that is one thing that she knew for sure he loved her son but it was just that he was an older man. She didn’t blame her son though, cause when you really stood back and took a look at one Mr. Kinney he was hot indeed. She couldn’t believe that she of all people had just said that, but she was soon broken from her thoughts by her cell phone. She looked at the Caller ID and saw that it was Justin so she answered.

Hey Kiddo, how’s the show? It’s great, I am really learning a lot. People here are really loving my stuff. Did you have a doubt, you are truly talented Justin. I know but Brian says you can’t fall for the bullshit you have to be careful and find someone who is really appreciates the work and aren’t just pulling your leg. Well when do you think you’ll be heading back? Well you know Linds can’t stay away from Mel that long with the baby coming so maybe tomorrow afternoon. Well it sounds like you’re having a blast so you must be calling for a reason is everything is all right? Yea I was just wondering could you do me a favor? Sure hun, anything. I’ve called the loft like three times and Brian’s cell and I haven’t gotten an answer, do you think maybe you could go by and check on him? I don’t know Justin I mean this is Brian, maybe he is out on one of those escapades of his, I would hate to go over there and interrupt. No, he has the flu and I’m sure that he’s just sleeping but I am worried could you just go over there for me and give me a call back? Sure, I will go right now but I’m sure nothing is wrong. Good there’s a spare key in my bag that I left there when I was over for dinner. Fine, I’ll give you a call back.

Justin couldn’t believe that he had just lied to his mother. The flu, he wished it was so simple with Brian but it wasn’t. He wished that he could tell his mother and have her comfort him and tell him that everything was going to be all right, but Brian threw him out when he found out, and he know that he’d surely have his balls if he told his mother. He was just worried, he wanted to go home to him but he couldn’t tell Linds cause he didn’t want anyone to know, he would just have to wait until his mother called him back and hopefully when she did it would be good news. He was sure he was over reacting.

Jennifer Taylor stood outside the loft of one Mr. Brian Kinney afraid to go in. She was sure that nothing was wrong, she could just pick up her phone and call her son back and tell him that when she got there no one was home, yea he would believe that, wouldn’t he? She feared to go inside afraid of what she might find. Brian would be there with some stranger fucking his brains out. It’s just a fuck, that all it was to him, it was different with her son though. They set all these rules. Brian could fuck whomever he wanted as long as he didn’t exchange names, or numbers, and no kissing on the mouth. He saved all his kisses from his mouth for Justin, but what about the other places of men his mouth had been, she shuddered at the thought and knocked but got no answer. She took out her key and braced herself for what might be going on inside. She turned the key and prayed a silent prayer to god that she didn’t see something she shouldn’t, she didn’t really want to have curse out young Mr. Kinney right now, all she was doing was a favor for her son. She whispered one more please god and entered the apartment.

She stuck her head inside and was quickly alarmed by how cold it was inside. The temperature their in The Pitts was quite pleasant why on earth was it so cold inside. She called out to Brian but there was no answer. She was happy that she got no answer she was about to leave but she thought she heard something. Something faint, something like a little moan and it was coming from the bedroom. She looked up and the sliding doors to the bedroom were drew back. She knew that she shouldn’t go up there to find her son’s much older love straddling some guy but something didn’t seem right. She called out his name once more, but she had to pull her coat to her because she was really starting to shiver because of the coldness. Then she heard it again that faint moan, she could’ve sworn it said sunshine. Sunshine was what Mr. Kinney called her son. Something about his eyes light up the world. She thought it was sort of sweet that he called him that, whenever he would seems as if his face would soften and for once he didn’t seem like the pompous ass that he like to show the world. People say that he’s different, and it’s because of the abuse he suffered as a child, but she has yet to see the softer side of Kinney, but something inside of her told her that something was wrong and she slid open his bedroom door. She could not believe what she saw, all she could do was gasp.

Brian Kinney really couldn’t remember how he got on the floor exactly. He knew that it was hot, the hotness was everywhere. The radiation had baked his body from the inside out and all he wanted was to get cool but he couldn’t. He remembered removing his clothes but that didn’t seem to help. And normally he loved to be naked, but these days he’s body was an ugly pale and he gotten skinny, and it didn’t help his long over six foot frame. He knew that when people saw him they thought that he was worn down, and those who knew he may think that maybe since he was gay he had gotten Aids and was dying. He hated that, that’s why he worked extra hard so that they didn’t notice. He had to keep a smile on his face, but how the hell did he end up on the floor? He looked to his left and he saw the bottle of meds they gave him for pain, he was to take two but he think he might’ve of took four, hell he couldn’t remember he just wanted the pain to stop he had things to do and people to fuck. When he thought about that he rubbed at the scar on his soft penis and felt the piece of plastic that was now where his testicle use to be. Oh right, they’d be no more fucking for awhile he couldn’t get it up. His house felt like a sauna and he knew that it must be freezing in their but he just couldn’t get cool.

Someone had entered, at least he thought someone had entered. Sunshine? Was he even there? No he wasn’t he was somewhere, what day was it he thought to himself, fuck how did I get on the floor. He looked to the left and their he saw it, his sweet Mary Jane. He loved marijuana and he smoked it all the time everyone knew that but to have it prescribed to him by a doctor, why that had to be fucking priceless for a guy like him, his bag was almost empty and a bottle of JB sat next to it. Maybe that’s why he was on the floor, pain pills, Mary J, and booze. There had to be something wrong with that. He could feel himself slipping away. Maybe he should close his eyes and just die. Who would miss him? Well there was Michael he was his best friend, and then his mother maybe she would. Gus would miss him, after all he was his father. Then he thought to himself would his father be waiting at the door to hell for him? That’s where all fags go according to his mother. Yea he’d just slip away and everyone would think he went out doing his favorite things getting drunk, getting high, and he was sure that by time the word spread across liberty avenue they would be some fucking somewhere in the story but someone was shaking him, who the hell was that?

Jennifer Taylor couldn’t believe what she was seeing, hell she didn’t quite understand. Their he lie, her son’s lover. He had been boozing, and drugging and apparently she walked in on some kind of what drug party gone wrong? Had he tried to kill himself? What the fuck was going on? He was sweating buckets and he was incoherent. Before she could stop herself she knew she had slapped him to try and get him to talk to her. He mumbled something about Sunshine and fucking. He was definitely out of it. She knew she needed to call an ambulance so she too her cell from her pocket and dialed 911. The flu my ass, she thought to herself. Brian was a loser, and now he’d done it. She prayed to god this would be the straw to break the camel’s back and her son would leave him alone. She realized their was drug paraphernalia all around and she did her best to get rid of it before she heard the ambulance approaching. She cleaned up the mess the best should could and she let them in.

They quickly covered the man, they said something about shock and other stuff that really didn’t make any sense to her at the moment. She couldn’t believe she had found him like that and why did he look the way he did. So pale, so vulnerable. She heard the paramedic ask if she was going with him and she was about say no but Brian reached out to her and whispered Sunshine? They told her that he was pretty out of it and he didn’t know what he was saying, but she knew what that meant he wanted his sunshine. He wanted her son, and she thought about the night that Chris Hobbs had bashed Justin’s head in and left him for dead and Brian rode in the ambulance with him and stayed with him, she nodded and crawled in the back with him and held his hand. She owed him this, if tonight would be the last night she dealt with one Mr. Kinney she owed him this. She heard him whisper Sunshine once more, and she squeezed his hand tightly and whispered in his ear that she was there and everything would be all right.

Justin Taylor stood outside the art museum smoking what he was sure was his eighth cigarette. Where the fuck was his mother? It had been about two hours and she hadn’t called him. He checked his phone and saw that it was out of service. He was in a bad calling area. Fuck! He hadn’t realized how loudly he had cursed until he saw look on the face of the man about ten feet away from him. Sorry was all he could say but he was really frustrated what was going on? Before he lost his signal he had called his mother and it went to voice mail. He didn’t need to hear his mother’s dorky message right now he needed to hear about Brian. He needed to know that he was all right. He should have never come to this, but he insisted and he knew that he had to obey when he insisted. Brian thought that if he didn’t go people would ask questions, after all they thought that for the last three days Brian had the flu, they had no idea about the cancer. Well Michael did, but he knew that he’d keep his mouth shut he was practically Brian Kinney’s dog. He took the worried look off his face when he saw Lindsay Peterson approaching.

Hey Linds, did you get Melanie? Yea she’s fine, Michael came to check on her and everything’s good, how about you did you get hold of Bri? No he’s not answering and now apparently I’m out of the area for a signal. Yea me too, the weather seems to be getting pretty bad here, so you ready to head to the hotel? Yea lets go maybe we can get better service there.

Jennifer Taylor couldn’t believe that she was actually there pacing the floor for Brian Kinney. She was sure it was a drug overdose, yet another reason her son needed to get away from him, he didn’t need to be expose to that lifestyle. Sure it was glittery from the outside but now this would surely be her wake up call. She just couldn’t believe Brian’s family though. She had called him mother, a horrid woman by the name of Joan and she was a real bitch. Call me when he dies. She couldn’t believe she said that, who would say that. She didn’t want to call Michael, because well they were use to Brian being Brian. She didn’t want to call Michael’s mother Debbie because well she had enough going through her mind with the death of her brother. She didn’t need this right now. But here she stood pacing the floor in his room. He was unconscious, he had an oxygen mask on and he slept peacefully. She knew there was something about pumping his stomach but that was all they told her. They just told her to sit with him because he didn’t like to be alone there. What was that suppose to mean? Then she saw a familiar face approaching and she knew that she would get some answers.

Hi do you remember me, you’re Hillary right? Mrs. Taylor, it’s been a long time, how are you? I’m good, how’s he doing? He’s doing better, it’s a good thing you got there when you did, he had taken too much of his medication and the booze well it all doesn’t go well with his treatment. Where’s your son, I was shocked to enter here and find you and not him? Justin is out of town, but wait a minute what do you mean treatment?

Oh it’s sad really, he is in his third week of radiation for cancer. He use to come and he’d be so said you know, and he was always alone, and I wonder what had happened to the little one cause I remember that when he was here fighting for his life he’d be here every night right outside the door never coming in of course. You know you were here. Yes, cancer are you telling me he has cancer is that what your telling me? Yea Testicular as I said he would be depressing almost and he’d come in here alone and he had just given up you know but then your son would come with him recently and they’d leave hand and hand. Sunshine, yea that’s what he calls him. You know when he would come alone I had pretty much decided that he was a real asshole cause he was always angry almost and he never looked at you, but when Justin would come with him everything was different. He came this morning though without him, he had another radiation treatment today and there was no one take him home, even called out for him a couple time while the drugs were wearing off but before the treatment he said he went on some kind of trip. He said it was time he got back to his life. But yea the poor guy doesn’t like pain, and he gets so hot easily, it’s good to see that you’re here. Everything looks good and they’ll probably release him in a few.

What release him are you guys nuts? Mrs. Taylor you know this is Brian Kinney, when the meds wear off and he can stand it is best we get the hell out of his way, we’ve learned that the hard way. Will you be staying or going? Jennifer looked back at the tall man lying on the bed, wincing at every breath like it might be his last and she took a long sigh and looked at Hillary and replied that she would be staying she wouldn’t be going anywhere but she had to step outside and make a call.

Justin was going out of his mind, he had just called his mother, and once again there was no answer. Something was the matter. He could feel it. He and Lindsay had went out and got bite to eat and immediately after digesting it, it released itself from his body he knew that meant that something was wrong. He was about to make a phone call when he nearly jumped from his skin when he heard the phone ring. He looked at his Caller ID and saw that it was his mom so he answered.

Where the fuck have you been! Justin couldn’t believe those words had come for his mouth and he quickly apologized. I’m sorry mom, did you find Brian? I sure did and he’s fine. Really? Yea I found him at loft, he was deep in work and you know how Brian is when it comes to his ad campaigns he was deep in thought and he didn’t want to be bothered with you. He quickly showed me to the door and told me to tell his sunshine to stop worrying so much, be a man and not a dyke. I swear Justin, are you sure this is the guy you want? Yes I’m sure, so you saw him and everything is all right? Yea, he looked a little feverish but he told me not to worry for I was not his mother and he slid the door in my face. So you enjoy your weekend and we’ll see you tomorrow afternoon. Are you everything is okay? Yea he was also a little pissed at me letting myself in and of course he took the key back but everything is fine dear. Thanks mom. Your welcome, and I love you Justin. Where did that come from? No where can’t a mother tell her son she loves him? I love you too mom, talk to you later. Talk to you later.