A.N. Hey everybody! sorry it's taken me so long to update...everytime I sit down to write, it seems like something inturrupts me...grrr so aggravating. Anyway, I'll try to update once more this week, and sorry if anything in this chapter is akward... BTW...thanx to all of you who have been giving me reviews! I really appreciate it. Constructive Critisism always helps, no? Well, anyway..Enjoy! Anonomys

Warning: Okay, i have to do this...(rules suck) FEMSLASH AHEAD. there...don't like it, call 1-800-Too-Bad.

As Catherine walked into the lab the next morning, she headed straight to the break room to fix herself a cup of coffee. She had dressed for work this morning and had no need to change. She was shocked , however, to find Sara asleep on the break-room’s very uncomfortable couch. She was wearing the same clothes she had on the last time Catherine had seen her and she looked exauhsted.

Sara always consumed any time she had with working; it was her safety net, a wall between her and everything else. She didn’t have to think about what to cook for dinner, or if she had laundry to…and she didn’t have to think about the painfully empty apartment waiting for her after work. She loved being a CSI, but Catherine hated seeing her so lonely.

Catherine had never seen Sara asleep before, and allowed her eyes to roam over the motionless form. ‘She looks so peaceful.’ The blonde was almost in awe – she had never seen Sara this calm, this…unconcerned. She decided then that she would do everything she could to get to feel this way more often.

Breaking out of her reverie, Catherine glanced at the clock. It was 20 minutes until 9:00. Deciding to let Sara sleep just a few more minutes, she began to brew a pot of coffee before the boys arrived.

Sara was having a wonderful dream. She was in a park and it was a gorgeous day – blue skyes with whispy clouds and a warm breeze to keep the heat at bay. She was sitting next to Catherine on a picnic blanket, holding hands as they watched a much younger Lindsey play on the Jungle-Gym.

“This was fun. I’m glad we took some time off work.” She sighed happily, smiling with a soft, loving look on her face as she glanced at Lindsey.

“She looks like she’s having so much fun.” Catherine smiled at her, love radiating from both women.

“Yes. And her mothers are having just as much fun.”

Sara Laughed.

“Sara…Sara…Sara…Sara!”

The brunette woke with a start, feeling a gentle hand shaking her shoulder.

“Hey, it’s alright,” soothed a calming voice. “It’s just me. Thought you might like some coffee.”

Sara blearily opened her eyes, blinking a few times to adjust herself to the light, and looking into the smiling face of Catherine herself.

“Cath? What…”

Catherine grinned. Sara looked so cute when she was waking up. She surprised herself by wanting to hear that nickname again. Usually, she bit peoples heads off if they dared use some stupid nickname for her. But from Sara’s mouth, it sounded sexy and endearing…adorable.

“You were asleep.” The blonde began, rather un-necessarily. “And I thought you might want to have a cup of coffee and change before the boys got here. No use letting them tease you, right?”

Sara nodded. The blonde handed her a cup of coffee, fixed just the way she liked it, smiling.

The brunette was still waking up, her hair tousled from sleep, her eyes heavy and slightly unfocused, and looking slightly refreshed. It was extremely cute.

“What time is it?” Sara’s voice, soft and gravely from sleep, sent shivers of arousal through Catherine’s body. Briefly she wondered what Sara’s bedroom voice would sound like. ‘Stop that, Willows.’

“Nearly nine. You wanna go get changed before the guys get here?”

Sara nodded once again. She stretched as she stood up, working the kinks out of her cramped torso. As she opened the door, intent on heading to the locker room, Catherine called out.

“Sara?” The brunette turned around.

“Thanks. For everything.” Slightly confused, but too tired to inquire further, she nodded.

“Anytime.”

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The next evening, before she had to get ready for work, Lindsey came into her room.

“Hey, sweetie. What’s up?”

“Hey mom…can we talk?”

Ok, something was definitely up. No self-respecting thirteen year old willingly went into their ‘un-cool’ mother’s room and asked if they could talk. Although, Catherine was not one to complain.

“Sure sweetie.” She sat down on the bed and patted the place beside her. “C’mere.”

Lindsey climbed onto the bed, and, to Catherine’s utter shock, and pleasure, snuggled up against her.

“What’d you want to talk about, baby?”

There was a brief silence, then Lindsey began to speak. “The other night, when I was hanging out with Sara, we talked about a lot of things. She told me about your guys’ job and stuff, and she told me how hard you work. I didn’t realize how hard it was for you mom, and…I wanted to say sorry. I’m so sorry about how I’ve treated you the past couple of years…ever since dad died, I’ve been such a monster to you, and you didn’t deserve that. I wish you would have told me to shut up…”

“…Linds…it’s ok, sweetheart. I understand. All teenagers…”

“No, mom. It’s not okay. Sara said you blame yourself for all of the bad things your job brings home, and for dad not being there, and then dying…I just wanted to tell you that I don’t blame you for anything…and you shouldn’t either.”

Catherine was crying. Only thirteen and her little girl was almost all grown up. She hugged her daughter closer as she played with her hair.

“Honey…it’s just something all mom’s do. I just want to give you the best life possible, and I can’t do that. It frustrates me. My job is something that should never have an impact on your life, and it does, often too much.”

The CSI shuddered, remembering the time Lindsey was kidnapped, and all of the times she had come home from a case and cried because the victim had looked so much like Lindsey.

“As for your father…there are a lot of things I wish I could change, Linds, but that is the biggest one. Eddie…your dad…should’ve always been there for you, no matter if we were together or not. And I feel like you should have your dad, and it’s one of the many, many things I can’t give you. Your dad and I may not have loved each other, but he still loved you, very much. And I hate that you had to lose that when you were so young.”

“I know mom…but dad’s death was his own fault.”

This shocked Catherine.

“Oh, come on, mom! I may not have understood when I was seven, but I’m almost fourteen now. I remember how you guys used to fight, and I remember how you used to cry. I even remember a couple of times when he hit you. And when he would take me out, yeah, sure, he’d get me ice cream and toys and whatever else I asked for, but now that I look back on it, he would usually leave me in the car while he went into peoples’ houses. He died because of his problems, not because of you.”

Cue the tears.

“Oh, baby…I’m so, so sorry you have those memories. God, I’m such a horrible mother!” Catherine laughed harshly.

“No your not, mom! Jeez, grown-ups!” Catherine could feel Lindsey shake her head. “I’ve been trying to tell you you’re a great mom…I love you and I’m glad you are my mom. I may get pissed off at you sometimes, and say things I regret, but I love you and I don’t blame you for anything. Please stop blaming yourself. Please? I don’t want to see you hurt anymore.” She kissed her mothers cheek, hoping to convey what she felt.

Catherine smiled sadly and stroked Lindsey’s hair. “I’ll try baby. I’ll try.”

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The next week and a half was relatively calm. No horrible serial killer cases, no gruesome mysteries, not even any cases where the perp wasn’t caught within the shift. Catherine and Sara worked together on several cases – a rare occurrence – and took the opportunity to have breakfast after shift, getting to know each other better than before.

Both women were extremely happy. Catherine kept in mind the conversation she had had in the car with her thirteen-going-on-thirty year old daughter. And she was trying to work up the guts to ask Sara Sidle on a date.

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okie dokie, so that's it! hope you liked...don't have to review, but it's always helpful!