Sorry it's been a while. Next update will be either Hero or Rurouni Naruto. Not sure which one yet... Oh yeah, this chapter's genre is humor. Next one will be serious. Anyways! Here ya go!

Thoughts: Blah blah

Demonic Voice: Blah blah

Chapter Six: The Fearsome Berserker Icha Icha Mode

Naruto leaned against a broken tree as he reached for a kunai. The enemy was tough, probably stronger than all three of them together. In fact, if it came down to it, he would even have to use Amaterasu. Cursing, the blond called to his teammates while remaining hidden. How had it come to this?

Oh yeah, I remember now. It was that stupid sensei of ours.

(FLASHBACK)

Anko scratched her purple hair with the back of her kunai before pointing it at the kids. “Okay! I want all of you to tell me your names, ages, strengths/weaknesses, likes/dislikes, hobbies, and goals! I really hate doing this, but since it's supposed to be required of me or something...whatever. Yeah, I'll go first.”

The newly made team seven currently sat on top of the academy building with their new sensei. It had taken a while though since Naruto, Rei, and Sasuke had been assigned the task of cleaning up after their sensei's... window breaking experience.

“So my name is Mitarashi Anko! About my age... Well, I kind of forgot.” Grinning, she scratched her head as Sasuke and Rei sweatdropped. “Anyways, I'm strong enough for you brats and I have no virtually no weaknesses. I like dango and juice!” Her face immediately turned dark as several ominous veins appeared on her forehead. “But I hate stupid snake people who have pale skin and laugh like pedophiles. I also hate people that are too energetic and happy. It makes me want to kill them.”

The genin stopped themselves from retorting that she was probably the most “energetic” person that they had ever met.

“Anyways! My hobbies are training, hunting, and eating new flavors of dango! My goal is to wipe a certain man off the face of this earth. Okay, your turn!”

Seeing that no one else was volunteering, Rei yawned a little before starting. “My name's Reina, Rei for short. I don't have a last name. I'm twelve years old, though I'll be thirteen soon. Since I don't have a family, I only know basic academy techniques. So I guess that's my weakness. I don't particularly have any strengths, but I'm sure that I'll find one eventually. As for my likes and dislikes... I love chocolate ice cream and I hate strawberry ice cream. I also hate blond haired temes. My hobbies are getting Naruto to buy me ice cream, and my goal is to have my very own ice cream shop!”

Naruto snorted, which then resulted to her slamming his head into the concrete floor. “Yep, that's all.” Patting her hands she sat back and smiled innocently.

Sasuke and Anko looked at each other for a minute before nodding. They reached a mutual agreement right then and there that they would never try to piss off the girl. The blond's head buried in the concrete was a testament to that.

Clearing her throat, Anko pointed to Sasuke. “Um, I guess we'll continue with the one that's still alive.”

Sasuke stared at Naruto's unmoving body for a second before shaking his head. What kind of team had he been assigned to? Deciding that it really didn't matter, he scoffed and folded his hands. Speaking deeply with his eyes focused on no particular object, he unleashed his trademark smirk. “My name...is Uchiha Sasuke.”

At once, the wind picked up and dramatically blew across his hair. A shadow flew over them as a spotlight shined down on Sasuke.

Continuing, he smirked as he turned his head like a model and held his hair. “I am...an avenger.”

Sasuke suddenly felt his head smash into the concrete. At once, the dramatic wind died with Sasuke cursing while holding his forehead. Looking up he saw Anko cracking her knuckles while chuckling menacingly. “Sorry kiddo. Each squad is allowed to have only one avenger. And that's me. So back off!”

Sasuke stared at her dumbly before shaking his head. Yep. This team was definitely crazy. “I'm twelve years old. My strongest point is my ninjutsu. I also excel at taijutsu. I believe that my genjutsu is my weakest point only because I haven't had a teacher. I have few likes and many dislikes. My hobbies are learning new jutsu and training. And my goal is to kill...” Looking at Anko's expression warily, he sighed. “My goal is to find someone.”

Anko nodded brightly as she patted Sasuke's head. “Good job! As expected of the number one rookie! Now, let's see... Ah, blondie! You're alive! Good, that means less paperwork for me!”

Naruto glared at Rei for a second before fixing his cold blue eyes towards Anko. “My name is Uzumaki Natsumune Naruto. Don't ask where the Natsumune comes from because I have no intention to tell you.” A questioning glance between the rest of team showed that no one knew about the origin of his strange middle name. Naruto then closed his eyes as he crossed his arms. “I have lived for twelve years. My greatest strength is my chakra control. I have a... satisfactory amount of chakra. I know very little ninja techniques. I have no intention to tell you anything more about my weaknesses. I like my sword, Kakashi, strawberry ice cream, and my deceased family. I dislike baka-Rei and her loud antics.”

“HEY!” (Guess who that is )

“As for my hobbies, well, I guess you could say training. I especially like to spar against Kakashi. And finally, my goal is to find my brother and talk to him.”

Anko looked at Naruto carefully before laughing. That's great! I like you kid! You're exactly like me!”

Yeah, right. Thought Sasuke and Rei.

“Anyways, I forgot to tell you guys something. You guys aren't genin yet.”

All three kids looked up at Anko questioningly.

“Well, what I mean to say is that you guys have to pass a secondary test. The first test was to simply root out the losers. So I'll meet all of you at seven o'clock tomorrow morning at training field seven. Oh, and make sure you a lot of food before you come. I like it when people throw up food along with their blood.” Laughing maliciously, she then disappeared in a shroud of smoke.

Naruto looked at Sasuke and Rei for a second before standing up. “You guys want to get some ice cream? I'll pay.”

Rei immediately jumped up and took the lead while Sasuke looked thoughtful. Finally the raven haired boy nodded and the three went off towards the nearest ice cream parlor.

OooOo

“So, how is he?”

Anko placed her feet on top of the Hokage's desk and yawned. “Which one? The cursed ice cream loving girl, the broody avenger, or the enigmatic blond wonder?”

The Hokage smiled at their nicknames before picking up a dango stick and popping a dango into his mouth. “The enigmatic blond wonder.”

Anko smiled mischievously as she forked several pieces of dango into her mouth at once. “He's interesting. Almost the exact opposite of that snake pedophile. I'll have fun with him tomorrow.”

“Careful, he's pretty strong.”

Anko suddenly turned around as she saw Kakashi come into the office. “What do you mean Hatake?”

Kakashi smiled as he pulled into a spare seat. “I told the others yesterday. The kid is stronger than me. In fact, he could probably fight on even grounds with our beloved Hokage.”

Anko paused for a second before stroking her chin. “Oh, yeah. That reminds me. The boy said something interesting today.”

This immediately caught the interest of the Hokage and Kakashi.

“Yeah, when we introducing ourselves, he said that one of his likes was you. You guys don't have like a...forbidden love thing going on, right?”

Kakashi immediately put his hands up and crossed them. “No, no. Don't worry, he just means that we're like family.”

Anko thought for a second before standing up. “Alrighty! Come on Hatake! You're going to buy me some dango! The one's that the Hokage brought taste like crap!”

The Hokage watched sympathetically as he waved goodbye to the two. Writing a note to himself, the Hokage finished the rest of the dango before sighing. He would have to give the copy nin a pay raise for the dango.”

OooOo

Naruto walked into the field with Rei when they saw Sasuke walking towards them. The day before had been fruitful since they had all succeeded in getting closer. Naruto and Rei found out about Sasuke's darker past involving his brother while Naruto shared some information about his deceased family. Of course, he didn't mention Shin's betrayal. However, Rei had remained unusually quiet during their conversation.

Sitting down in a circle, the three waited for their sensei to come. Finally, after about an hour, a loud voice called to them from the trees.

“HEY BRATS! YOU'RE EARLY!”

Naruto, Sasuke, and Rei glared at their approaching sensei. Deciding to be the mouth of the group, Rei stepped forward and angrily shouted. “What the hell are you talking about Sensei!? It's eight! You said seven!”

Anko paused for a second before chuckling nervously. “Oh, well... When I meant seven, I actually meant eight. Didn't you know that all great shinobi count an hour later! It's crucial if you want to be a strong ninja!”

That's such a lie. Thought all three genin simultaneously.

Clearing her throat, Anko pulled out a brown package and put it on the floor. “Well, let's begin your genin test then, shall we? Your first task is to destroy this package. It has a pretty strong seal on it, so anything short of a strong C class jutsu won't be able to destroy it. Now-”

“KATON: GOUKAKYUU NO JUTSU!”

Naruto and Rei stepped aside as Sasuke blew a fireball towards the package. After holding the flame for a few seconds, Sasuke then cut the fire and smirked at his achievement.

“Alright lady. What's part two?”

Anko blinked twice before grinning. “Good job! I really didn't expect you to know such an advanced jutsu. Alright, I guess we'll move to part two of your test. But I'll warn you now, you might die. This is your last chance to back out. If you pass you'll become genin and train under me. If you fail, you get sent back to the academy. But there's always the risk that you'll lose your life during the test. In the end it's your choice.”

Sasuke crossed his arms and looked towards Naruto and Rei. “You two better not back out. I hate to say it, but I actually believe her this time. We're going to need all the manpower we can get. I'm not going to fail just because you two might chicken out.”

Rei smirked and slapped Sasuke's back. “You're kidding right? After all, I had to endure a three hour conversation with you guys. No way am I doing that again with another group. I'm in.”

Naruto shrugged before stepping forward. “Though I'm not looking forward to having her as a sensei, going back to the academy would be...unappealing.”

Anko laughed heartily while taking out a scroll. “Alright guys. Here's your final test. Now get ready, because it's going to get wild!” The three genin hopefuls braced themselves as Anko opened up the scroll. A cloud of smoke suddenly erupted, obscuring the area in a dense fog.

A summoning?! Naruto looked around quickly to find his teammates. Finally, the smoke cleared to reveal a truly horrifying sight.

“Eh? What the hell? ANKO!”

Naruto, Sasuke, and Rei gaped as they saw a wet Kakashi with nothing but a towel and a mask. (He wears that thing everywhere) Anko meanwhile smiled like no other before handing him some clothes. “Here Kakashi, you'll need these.”

Kakashi quickly took the clothes and hurriedly put them on. “Geez, what's your problem! And how the hell do you have my summoning scroll?!” The copy nin had finally finished dressing, although his hair was still slightly wet.

“Oh, that's not important Kakashi. What is important... is that!” Turning around, she dramatically pointed at the charred area that the brown package had once stood on. My students burned that area.”

Kakashi looked at her strangely before blinking. “Soooo...your point is?”

Anko devilishly smiled. “Tell me Kakashi, do you know where your newest edition of Icha Icha Paradise is? It was a signed copy too, right? The area that is burned is all that remains of your book after these kids destroyed it.”

Realization dawned on Kakashi face as he looked at the charred area, then to the genin, then to the charred area again. A few gears clicked in his head before everything suddenly stopped.

Anko quickly turned to the students after slapping a bell onto Kakashi's vest. “You guys have to get this bell in order to pass! Good luck!” With that, she quickly ran away to who knows where. Meanwhile, Kakashi was still frozen with little machine sounds whirring from his head.

“Umm... Kakashi-san? Are you okay-” Rei gasped and took a step back as she saw Kakashi mechanically turn towards them. His eyes were blood red with steam coming out of his ears. At that moment, there was only one word repeating continuously in his mind.

KILL!

“Guys... Run away.”

Sasuke and Rei looked at Naruto strangely. “What are you talking about?”

Naruto actually had a look of fear on his face as he gripped their arms. “I MEAN RUN AWAY NOW!”

Kakashi suddenly created six Kage Bunshins, with each doppledanger holding two chidoris. “RAAAH! I'LL KILL YOU ALL FOR DESTROYING MY BOOK!”

The clones sprinted forward at an incredible speed, causing Naruto to swear. Gathering chakra, he quickly made two wind clones to carry Sasuke and Rei away while he place a chakra field in front of him to hold off the enraged copy nin.

(END FLASHBACK)

And so it was because of their stupid sensei that Naruto, Sasuke, and Rei were currently hiding behind a tree while holding their breaths. In the distance they could hear trees being smashed to pieces along with a loud fiend like voice yelling out for them.

“Naruto...who the HELL IS THAT MAN!?” Sasuke pointed towards the area that was being demolished.

“Ah. That would be Kakashi.”

Sasuke looked around before whispering in a hushed voice. “Yesterday you said that he was the most laid back jounin in our village! This is NOT a laid back jounin. This is a homicidal insane killer!”

Naruto chuckled half-heartedly. “Well, right now, Kakashi is in his Berserker Icha Icha Mode.”

Rei turned to Naruto and temporarily forgot about the impending doom. “Berserker Icha Icha Mode?”

Naruto nodded solemnly before explaining. “It's a truly fearsome weapon. I first found out about it when I accidentally threw away one of his older books. He immediately became a weapon of mass destruction, forgetting me or anyone else until his revenge was exacted. In that mode, he loses all common sense, but in return, multiplies his strength three fold. It took myself, six jounin, and the Hokage to finally calm him down.”

Sasuke suddenly dropped to the ground in disbelief while Rei muttered words resembling “We're gonna die...We're gonna die...” Naruto stood up before facing them.

“Don't worry, I have a plan. This is what we're going to do.”

OooOo

Anko watched in boredom as she held up her sixteenth dango stick. “If I knew that it would've been this one sided, I would have at least bought some more dango. Ah well, it's kinda fun to see Kakashi so angry. Might as well get some sleep, especially since this'll take a while.”

OooOo

Naruto swore as they all jumped away from their hiding place. Kakashi had found them. Deciding that enough was enough, Naruto jumped into the air and quickly gathered his chakra. Hopefully the plan would work. If it didn't... Well, he really didn't want to think about that.

“TAJUU UZUMAKI NO BUNSHIN!”

Five bunshins of different elements suddenly appeared around Kakashi. The copy nin seemed unphased though, for he quickly pulled out several kunai. The wind clone attacked first, using its speed attributes to catch the copy nin by surprise. After unleashing a few deft moves, the wind clone then switched places with a fire clone. Seeing its opening, the fire clone quickly transferred all of its chakra into its fist to unleash a devastating punch that knocked the air out of Kakashi. The transfer of all its chakra then resulted in its destruction, causing a plume of smoke to appear in front of the confused copy nin. The earth and water clones jumped forward and each grabbed a leg, while the final shadow clone ran up along side the real Naruto with a Hakka: Gofubaku. However, right before the two reached the copy nin, they merged the two attacks together to form a new attack. A swirling tornado of chakra surrounded the real Naruto's arm, with a void of empty space following him.

“It's over Kakashi. “UZUMAKI RENDAN: GOTATSUMAKI NO KANADZUCHI!” (Uzumaki Combo: Five Tornado Hammers)

Shoving the attack into the ground, Naruto braced himself as the attack made debris fly up into the air. Eventually the attack itself exploded, causing both ninja to fly away in opposite directions. The two laid like that for a few seconds before Kakashi slowly started to get up. Still laying down, Naruto quickly turned his head and shouted into the trees. “NOW!”

Immediately Sasuke and Rei jumped out of the bushes and ran towards Kakashi. Sasuke and Rei looked harshly at Naruto before swearing. Both sighed before forming a handseal.

I can't believe I'm about to do this.

Kakashi was getting up now. Judging from the color of his eyes, they could tell that he was still in his “Berserker Icha Icha Mode.” Well, it was time to fight fire with fire.

Bracing themselves, Sasuke and Rei both yelled out in a loud voice. “HENGE: ICHA ICHA PARADISE NO VERSION!” (I think the translation is self explanatory)

The smoke disappeared, revealing a shirtless grown up Sasuke chasing after a grown up bikini clad Rei. The two were in freeze frame.

Both peered at each other from the corner of their eyes before sweating.

This is SO not going to work.

Kakashi paused for a second before the gears in his head turned one more time. Sasuke and Rei held their breaths as they tried to maintain their pose. Finally, Kakashi stood up and started to clap. The man had tears in his eyes, causing all three of the genin to sweat furiously.

“That was beautiful you guys. Alright, I forgive you for destroying my book. Oh, and here's your bell.”

Sasuke and Rei dismissed their forms as Rei caught the bell. “Thanks Kakashi. Sorry about your book. If we ever get a chance to replace it, well, we'll try.”

Kakashi smiled at them before sitting back on the ground. “You guys should check up on your other teammate. That last attack he pulled was a little too much for both of us.”

Sasuke and Rei nodded as they walked over to a smug looking Naruto. The blond was still laying on the floor with his body half buried in rubble.

“So, I see it worked.”

Rei growled as she sat on Naruto and pulled him up by his shirt collar. “Now explain yourself.”

Naruto smiled as he tried to move his hand to brush away hers. Finding that he had no energy, Naruto gave up and simply settled for laying there. “Well, the attacks I did earlier were to exhaust his energy. Also, the last attack I used made him pretty much immobile, thus allowing you guys to do your thing. I guess I forgot to tell you this before, but the only way to break the “Berserker Icha Icha Mode” is to use an Icha Icha trigger. That's where you guys came in. It was pretty interesting because last time, the Hokage was the one that henge'd. Yeah... That was a keeper.”

Rei looked at him for a second before nodding. “Huh. I still hate you though. Do you know how embarrasing that was?!”

Sasuke nodded dangerously as he cracked his knuckles. “I agree with Rei in this matter. You deserve some manner of punishment.” Taking out a kunai, he narrowed his eyes while looking at the defenseless blond.

“What? I thought you looked pretty good Rei. If that's really how you're going to look in a few years, I wouldn't mind getting together with you.”

Rei's face turned red as she stuttered. Looking at the blond, then at Sasuke, she laughed nervously as she slapped his face. “HAHAHAHA! You're such a kidder Naruto!” Laughing, she continued to hit the poor blond.

Sasuke sweatdropped as he reached for her shoulder. “Um, Rei?”

Stopping, she turned to Sasuke. “What?”

Coughing, Sasuke pointed at Naruto before looking away. “If you slap him any more, I think he'll die.”

“What are you talking about?” Looking down, she saw an unconscious Naruto with drool hanging out of his mouth. “Oh.” Laughing sheepishly she got off of him. “My bad.”

The two stared at each other for a second before turning to Naruto. “Well, he still deserved it. Hold up a sec Sasuke.” Reaching down, she shuffled through Naruto's pockets and found his wallet. “Alright! Let's go get some ice cream!”

Sasuke smirked before looking at the unconscious Naruto. “This is a rare opportunity though. An unconscious Naruto... We should do something at least. We could always try to take off his mask.”

Rei thought for a second before shaking her head. “That won't work. He uses some kind of jutsu that makes it impossible for anyone other than himself to take it off. I once tried while he was sleeping. No... I got a better idea.”

OooOo

Naruto blinked a little before groaning. The last thing he remembered was Rei sitting on top of him and slapping him silly. His eyes were still adjusting to the light though. From what he could tell, it was dark. Also, he still couldn't move. Sighing, he opted for laying there until he heard sounds. Straining his ears, he tried to figure out what they were. Concentrating he managed to make them out as...giggles? His eyes snapped open as he suddenly saw a multitude of girls standing around him. With horror he realized that they were fan girls.

HOLY SH-

OooOo

Sasuke and Rei smiled knowingly as they sat comfortably inside the ice cream parlor. Sasuke had quickly taken a liking to coffee ice cream, while Rei remained faithful to her chocolate flavor. However, the reason why the two were so happy were because of the screams of pure agony and torture coming from around field seven.

Revenge is a dish best served in ice cream. Rei thought as she looked at Naruto's empty wallet.

OooOo

Anko suddenly sat up as she yawned. It had been a nice nap. Looking around, she tried to spot her kids and Kakashi, but found only a mass of girls assaulting that Naruto kid. Muttering a few words of nonsense, she saw a stick of dango laying nearby. Grabbing it, she silently chewed on them before walking away.

Hm... I wonder if they passed. Oh well, guess I'll find out tomorrow.

Key terms:

Amaterasu- Naruto's sword, previously Shin's. Heirloom to the Natsumune family. For some reason, it rejected Shin and turned black. (Originally pure white) Now it is Naruto's. Not much is known about it, though we do know that it is able to generate black flames. Name origin comes from a famous Japanese god. (Item rarity: S Class)

Hakka: Gofubaku- Naruto's first official technique. Shoots out chakra that dissembles organs. However, if used correctly, it is able to shoot out a fan of chakra that can be used for physical damage. The basic technique itself is basically a swirl of chakra from the user's palm. Therefore it can be used a thrust type move too. Naruto's tradmark technique. It requires near perfect chakra control. (Ninja class: High B/Low A rank) Natsume Family

Chidori- Kakashi's original attack. However, Kakashi seems to have been developing a new type of chidori after training with Naruto. One of his original techniques. (Ninja class: A rank) Kakashi

Katon: Goukakyuu no jutsu- Giant fireball technique. Very linear, but covers a lot of area. Size depends on the user's chakra. The technique seems to have some sort of significance to Sasuke. (Ninja class: High C/Low B rank) Almost all Chunins and up; Sasuke

Berserker Icha Icha Mode- An incredibly lethal technique that transforms the user. The trigger's cause is still a mystery, although researchers say that it requires the Icha Icha Paradise novel. The berserker mode takes away all common sense, but in return, gives the user three times the amount of power and chakra he/she normally has. (Ninja class: Super S rank) Kakashi

Henge: Icha Icha Paradise no Version- I don't even want to explain this.

Tajuu Uzumaki no Bunshin- Naruto makes five clones, each with different elemental attributes. Wind has extra speed, earth has more defense, water can heal itself, fire has more power, and shadow is... the same. So far they are the only Konoha ninja techniques that Naruto knows besides the Henge, Kawamiri, and Shunshin. It requires near perfect chakra control. (Ninja class: A rank) Naruto

Uzumaki Rendan: Gotatsumaki no Kanadzuchi (sp?)- Literally means Uzumaki combo: five tornado hammers. Used in conjunction with Tajuu Uzumaki no Bunshin. Experimental technique. Naruto made this technique up during his genin test. Although powerful, it is a double edged blade, with Naruto probably suffering more damage since he is closer to the blast. Made from combining two Hakka: Gofubaku's, it is currently Naruto's strongest move (without the aid of a sword). However, it has only been used on the ground. The effects of what will happen when used directly on a person is still unknown. The attack itself uses chakra from the very air, causing a void of empty space to appear behind him. Again, the effects of such a trait are unknown. The attack requires perfect chakra control. (Ninja class: S rank) Naruto

A/N: This chapter was kind of a humorish type. Don't worry. Next chapter will have plenty of angst. Sasuke will start to brood again because of a surprise visit from GUESS WHO! Oh, and you'll find out more about Rei in the next chapter. As for Rei and Naruto's relationship...Well, that's not going to come for a long time. Though there will be little things here and there. This chapter was sort of a filler. Next chapter will get serious and more in perspective with the story mood. I just wanted to make the advent of team seven a happy memory so that they might look back at it in the more grimmer and darker future. Remember, this fic was and is originally a dark fic, so yeah. ANYWAYS! Here are the review thingy whatevers. REMEMBER, NARUTO NEEDS TO BE POWERFUL, SO DON'T SAY "Oh... You made Naruto too strong" Go read my forum if you have your doubts. Okaaay!

Review topics-

1)Was Anko okay? I mean, you need to have at least one hyperactive person in a squad. Not having one is a taboo in the Narutoverse.

2)Anyone want to see a Berserker Icha Icha Mode Jiraiya? Hehehe... The possibilities!

3)Do you want Hero or Rurouni Naruto next? (Sorry, not a story review question)

4)First mission C Class turned A class mission... Should it be to the Wave country or the Tea country? You decide!

5)Power levels. Does anyone actually pay attention to them? Because I'll post them up every chapter if you really want me to, but if no one reads them there's really no point. So the question is, do you want me to post power levels every chapter? Cause honestly, it's kind of a pain in the butt. But for my readers, I will do anything!

6)Ahhh... Did ya miss me? It's been a while since my last update hasn't it?

Thanks! See you again in another story! Remember to review!