Disclaimer: I don’t own X-men or Marvel. I just wish I did.

Summary: An inner look to how Wanda affects John. This is an oneshot, based on my scorned fics, but it can be viewed otherwise. Jonda

He Doesn’t Understand

He doesn’t get it; he cannot comprehend how she can do this to him. She’s just a girl, the daughter of his former boss. She had anger problems, and maybe even a little bit of depression. She calls him names all the time. She has little control over her emotions, and her powers could wreck something pretty badly. She’s sarcastic and she’s moody. She’s just a girl, yet Wanda Maximoff is the world to St. John Allerdyce.

He really doesn’t know when or how it happened, just that it did. He often tries to put it into words, into novels so he can try and understand how it led to his powerful feelings for her. Though, each time he does, she gets mad and he’s never any closer to how she did this to him.

He’s insane, his obsession with fire is unhealthy and he knows it. He hasn’t tried to change for her or for anyone really. He likes fire as much as he likes writing. They engulf him both with such a serious passion that barely anything will grab him away from. Though, when it comes to Wanda, it’s a different story.

She changes his moods so suddenly. A single expression on her face can change his entire way of acting for a moment. A frown, a smile, tears, they all can move him to sanity, calmness and he doesn’t get why.

She’s just a girl; she shouldn’t mean so much to him. But she’s something he can touch, and when it comes to obsessions for St. John Allerdyce, he cannot really touch any of them. There is fire; he could touch it without causing harm to himself, if he was the one manipulating it. But, it’s still untouchable. Fire is wild and not so tangible. He can twist it around, making various figures that agree to his every whim, but he cannot really touch it. Then there is his writing. He cannot touch that either. Sure, he can hold a pen or type on a keyboard, but he cannot touch the story. It’s something that flows from his insides ever so strangely. He cannot touch it.

He can touch her though. She didn’t always allow him to, but after much time passed, she began to accept him.

He doesn’t really recall why he had decided to pursue her. It might have been because like his other obsessions, she seemed untouchable too. She was too angry, too spiteful and too hurt for anyone to actually get close to her. And she was wild and barely tangible to anyone’s grasp. Yet, he reached out and actually grabbed a hold of the Scarlet Witch. Till this day, he still does not know how he accomplished that.

She makes him moody, she makes him thrilled, and she makes him empathetic. He doesn’t know what she does to make him like that, maybe it’s some twisted spell, or just something she is naturally good at. He doesn’t know. He cannot make out what she does in fire manipulations, or even novels. She just does it, and no words can explain it.

Though it confuses him, he adores how he feels. He loves how she can do all these things to him, and he cannot get past how she can make him so stable, when he is really far from it. A lot of people don’t get St. John Allerdyce, and he doesn’t blame them. He’s crazy, loud and can be very annoying if he wishes it. He’s received numerous death threats, and been chased around in games of misfortune. Many people cannot stand being around him because of it. But she can. She could spend entire days with him and still want to hug him at the end of it all. She understands him better than he understands himself sometimes. He doesn’t get that either.

He thinks he confuses her though, sometimes. It’s not hard to see when she’s crying and he’s all around her trying to make her feel better. She gets this look in her eye, surprised that he can care so much about little bits of water that flow from her eyes. He really likes that look she gets. It makes her look more tangible. And he likes it when she’s tangible.

As time goes on, he becomes more obsessed with her, more in love with her. He still doesn’t understand why, but it happens. He doesn’t want it to stop either. He knows she has issues, and he has some himself. He doesn’t want anything to change. It’s perfect the way it is.

She’s his only tangible obsession, and a forever growing flame.

End

A/N: Just something I kind of threw together, it’s incredibly short, but oh well. I hope everyone likes it and please review.