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It was utterly ridiculous. For Q, this was even pushing the limits beyond normal oddities, straight to really odd oddities. Climbing a wall, and sweating much more than he thought humans were rightly capable of, and having to deal with an unnatural primal fear of falling was more than he could take. And to top it off, the hyper oxygenated air of this planet was beginning to make him dizzy. The rocks were very sharp too, and he didn't particularly enjoy the pain of supporting himself on them.

Q supposed he could just numb himself from the pain. He was Q after all. But, Jean Luc had insisted it wasn't a good sport if you cheated, and he would certainly know fake pain from real pain when he looked at Q. While Q could be somewhat of a trickster, his acting abilities were admittedly lacking.

This entire ridiculous situation had began a year ago, when former Captain Jean Luc Picard had developed a rather aggressive disease, and was looking at the very end of his overly complicated, overly eventful life. The outlook was grim, and while there was an effective cure, it had some nasty side effects and Picard had no desire to spend the rest of his life in pain. He'd opted to just die.

And Q, being Q, could not just let him die without some sort of an eventful send-off. He had mentioned that it would be like a grand, everlasting party – of course, Q hadn't had climbing in mind, but that was something he was going to have to tolerate for this man. He had imagined a few nice vacations, each to extend Jean Luc's life by a small bit, to fulfill those last little dreams he'd set aside for so long in the name of Starfleet.

Unsurprisingly, Q had been unable to convince Jean Luc to become a Q. The man had been much like the rocks Q was clinging to now, sharp, unyielding, and frankly quite annoying. If only he could understand, if only he would consider…

It was a useless train of thought now, and Q knew he shouldn't be distracting himself when he was a good fifty feet from stable ground.

Luckily, the precipice was in sight now, and Q exhaled in relief. Of course, Jean Luc was already there, and Q was definitely trailing a good deal behind, but he was just happy he hasn't fallen. Forget that he could just will the universe and stop the fall – the human part of him was ludicrously skeptical of the idea.

He rolled his eyes up to the cavern ceiling. It was vicious looking, and he wondered vaguely if those jagged stones would fall on him in the event of an earthquake. He tried to ignore the fact that this little planet seemed to dislike him, and he wondered what the hell Jean Luc could possibly see in it. In fact, Jean Luc had even mentioned something to the likeness of 'beautiful' while describing it, and Q entirely failed to see beautiful. He saw a lot of funny colored rocks and perilous cliffs.

But Q wasn't going to complain, at least not until Jean Luc was satisfied with his little trip. It was the fourth trip so far. The first two had been archeological digs, and Q hadn't been able to stop himself from just shouting 'There are no vases here! They were all wiped out in a flood three years ago, you imbecile,' but apparently that wasn't the point. After eight hours of digging through dusty, hot sand, they had found nothing at all, and yet Jean Luc had left the scene with a pleasant little smile on his face and Q had left with a backache.

Oh, he loathed humanity.

A final harsh push, and Q dragged himself up onto the rock face, panting and red-faced, and feeling like he'd… well, just climbed a precipice.

To make matters all the worse, Jean Luc was no where to be found, and for a moment Q dearly hoped that the man had fallen to his death and freed Q from this damnable little present. But the thought made him feel funny, but it was probably just the thick supply of oxygen, and he staggered his way to the small tunnel that Jean Luc had undoubtedly gone through. The funny colored rocks were shimmering, and it was not helping with his lightheadedness, so he made sure to keep a hand on the wall to keep himself from toppling over.

A cold rush of air hit him. Q shivered, and he realized his hatred for this little world was quickly reaching an entirely new level. Sharp, rocky, and cold. The only thing that could possibly make it worse was rain, but he knew rain wouldn't happen here, and he was grateful for that much.

There was an entrance to the outside, and Q reluctantly pulled himself from the semi-warm, claustrophobic tunnel to the freezing cold, windy outside. Jean Luc was there, luckily, standing on a tall rock face. Beyond him, there was a sea of rocks, curved and sharp and deadly, but in the deep night they shimmer the light of the many moons, gleaming silver and blue, mingled with a dank fog. It looked like a vast ocean before them, stretching far into the horizon where the first moon had already begun to set.

For a brief moment, Q was caught up in that ridiculous human fascination with such things, and he felt a powerful emotion that Qs weren't generally accustomed to. A kind of love, love for the sight, but he knew that sight was useless and shallow, something that could not possibly capture the full magnitude of what was before him. The splendor of this scene was nothing more than coincidental elements mingling together, invoking some human emotion, human longing for the home planet.

Surely, to any other species, this would be nothing more than a field of rocks and mist.

It was ironic, then, that Jean Luc isn't looking out at the rocks, but up at the stars. Quiet, still, and lost in some memory of a home he once loved, he stared up at the endless darkness. Q didn't speak, and indulged the former Captain in a moment of silence. In the field, the rocks turned from blue to green as a new moon rose.

"Q," said Jean Luc, gaze never wavering from the sky. His home. Not earth, not this wretched planet of dangerous beauty, but the stars themselves. That endless dark that meant freedom and eternity and childish joy that never ceased. They were the same stars Jean Luc had mapped out in his earliest memories, waiting, just waiting to dance in freedom and see everything he once imagined, to live a life he could never regret.

Jean Luc picked up his knapsack. Q waited to hear the words, and found himself hoping they'd be spoken, succumbing to those foolish human emotions like desire and optimism.

Without looking away from the sky, Jean Luc murmured the words.

"Let's go home."