Chapter 1

The Beginning and the End

"I'm not the girl-who-lived!" Jamie screamed into the hall.

Her hands yanked her skirt down revealing the god-awful truth.

"I'm the BOY-who-lived!"

Harry woke to cold hands skimming over his torso and slipping under his shirt. He gasped and looked up into obsidian eyes.

“Sev?” Harry whispered, confused.

“Just relax, Harry. I want you to be comfortable for your big day.” Severus sat down on the bed and gave Harry a vial filled with ominous green liquid. “Drink it.”

Harry bit his lip, hesitant. One look at Severus however, had him gulping down the contents of the vial. He felt warmth take over his body and suddenly the proximity of Severus’ body did not confuse him. He shuddered and stood, looking at Severus with a small smile.

“One day we will be together, but for now, I must remain with Draco.” With that, Harry left the room, knowing that today would be interesting to say the least.

Harry entered the great hall and quickly found a seat between Blaise and Draco. Blaise was looking at Theodore unusually, almost as if he were infatuated with the boy. Harry did not pay much attention to this however, as Jamie Potter was storming over towards him. Harry stood up and held open his arms.

Jamie broke out into a grin and ran into them, pressing her lips to Harry’s. Suddenly, the hall went silent. The students and teachers looked at the two with a mixture of utter bewilderment and disgust.

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING, HARRY?” Draco shouted, losing his composure but not caring.

Draco stared wide-eyed as the twins kissed each other. He stood up, ignoring Blaise and Theodore who told him not to interfere yet. Harry broke the kiss and looked at Draco sadly.

“How could you, Harry? I thought,” Draco whispered, eyes fierce. “I thought you were mine?”

Draco sneered at Jamie and raised his hand. It sailed through the air and slapped the girl hard enough to leave a handprint. Jamie looked at Harry and Draco in shock before bursting into tears. Hermione and Ron followed her as she ran out of the hall.

Draco pulled Harry closer and crushed their lips together. Cheers and gasps met their union but neither paid any attention, too lost in their sensations. Harry gasped as Draco roughly staggered back. Severus looked furious at the two.

“What is the meaning of this foolishness?” Severus snarled.

“Sev…we talked about this,” Harry whispered, blushing hard.

Severus ignored him and glared at Draco. Before anyone could blink, Draco knelt on the ground, cradling a quickly bruising cheek. Severus dropped his hand in satisfaction. Harry looked upon the scene with shock and before he knew it, Severus was kissing him. It was glorious and sweet, and Harry knew automatically which person he wanted to be with the most.

Dumbledore stood up and waved his wand in attempts to dispel the illusion, but found his hall filled with floating pies instead. Many students stood up on their seats in attempts to catch these pies with their mouths. Dumbledore looked outraged, as did many of the other professors. They looked up at their headmaster with confusion. What in the world was happening?

Dumbledore opened his mouth to reassure them but all that came out was a snort. He attempted speaking once more, but several snorts sailed out past his lips.

“Snort…snort, snoooooorrrrrrrrrtttttttt,” snorted Dumbledore.

“Harry Potter,” sang Jamie, who had reappeared.

“Not a Potter,” Draco sang back.

“I’m a lover,” Harry inserted randomly.

“Not a fighter,” Severus hummed.

“HARRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYY , I MEAN HAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRYYYYYY IN DA HOUSE!” chorused the entirety of the students.

Harry winked devilishly and Argus Filch grabbed Mrs. Norris and smacked a wet one on her furry cheek.

“Harry!” Draco cried out, reaching out dramatically to the boy. “We have to get out of here! Severus is coming to get you!”

Harry ran forward and grabbed Draco’s hand, smiling lovingly. “I love you, Draco. I’m so sorry for kissing, Sev. He’s just…experienced.”

Draco smiled back. “It’s all right, beloved. We’ll become just as experienced, learning together.”

“Quick, divert them!” Severus roared.

Ron, who had entered with Jamie, glared at the two and threw his shoes at them. “Beware, my chess pieces are next, foolish mudbloods!”

Draco pulled out his wand. “Serpensortia!”

Romantic music began playing as a vicious looking cobra sailed out from Draco’s wand. Ron caught the snake and looked deep into its eyes. They cuddled together and Ron led the way to the nearest empty classroom.

Draco looked at Harry and released his hand. Harry looked hurt. His eyes watered and he reached out towards Draco, silently wishing that they could be together again.

“I’m sorry,” Harry whispered.

“As am I,” Draco replied.

Harry let out a soft sob and began singing.

“Kiss me too fiercely
Hold me too tight
I need help believing
You're with me tonight
My wildest dreamings
Could not foresee
Lying beside you
With you wanting me

“And just for this moment
As long as you're mine
I've lost all resistance
And crossed some borderline
And if it turns out
It's over too fast
I'll make ev'ry last moment last
As long as you're mine,” Harry trailed off, looking at Draco expectantly.

Draco scowled,
“Maybe I'm brainless
Maybe I'm wise
But you've got me seeing
Through different eyes
Somehow I've fallen
Under your spell
And somehow I'm feeling
It's "up" that I fell,” he sang, voice capturing the already spellbound hall.

Draco and Harry grinned at each other and kissed chastely before singing together.
“Every moment
As long as you're mine
I'll wake up my body
And make up for lost time!”

Draco sent a glance at Severus who glared at him. “Say there's no future, for us as a pair.”

Harry joined him and looked at Severus with a small smile before meeting eyes with Draco.

“And though I may know
I don't care!
Just for this moment
As long as you're mine
Come be how you want to
And see how bright we shine
Borrow the moonlight
Until it is through
And know I'll be here holding you
As long as you're mine!”

A/N:

xD HAHAHAHA. That was a fun April Fools Day. Traditionally, it's only until 12pm, but fanfiction is all around the world so it was for the full day. This chapter will remain up however because I love it so much xP. The next chapter will be the REAL FIRST chapter. It'll be totally different so no worries. I'm not really going to turn AAU into a giant crack series.

Next chapter will have some angst and make up fluff though. 3

This chapter has been brought to you in honour of Fred and George's birthday.

ENJOY!

- Nitti