Author: ayrenni PM
Tony's got some reasons why he keeps on working for the NCIS. Some short fics in Tony's POV. Read and review, please! Chapter 6 finally up!Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Drama/Angst - Tony D. - Chapters: 7 - Words: 4,919 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 28 - Updated: 01-19-08 - Published: 05-05-07 - id: 3523553
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Author's Note: I have to admit that I haven't posted a new chapter for an awfully long time and so I must tell everyone who has been waiting for an update that I am really sorry. But now I can at least say that this story will probably have 10 chapters. I hope you all enjoy this one!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything of NCIS and I am making no money here.
Summary: Tony just can't stand silence.
Defying the silence
Even at a young age Tony realized that he was by far more effective, whenever there was some kind of background noise.
No matter if it was a movie that played in his room while he was doing his homework or other students that were talking in the rows behind him, while he was contemplating the question the teacher had just asked.
His brain just seemed to need it to work properly.
And the one thing he hated most of all was silence.
Because silence for him always symbolized something was not right. That he had to be on his guard.
He passionately detested the regular family dinners at his home for one. No one would say a word. Everyone would sit at the table and eat quietly as not to attract his volatile father's attention.
Silence reminded him of the times when his father just fixed Tony with a look, his eyes so filled with loathing and disappointment that he seemingly wasn't even able to bring himself to talk to Tony.
So Tony started to only feel secure with some kind of noise. He transformed from the silent little boy to the overly-confident kid that just wasn't able to shut up.
Whenever the lack of noise started to bother him, he just talked and talked and talked as if there was no tomorrow.
Tony just had never been able to break this habit of his.
It was the reason why he, even after a hard day at work, would rather go to some club with loud music and a lot of talking and laughing people instead of relaxing at home and enjoying the quiet.
Because he would never be able to enjoy silence the way other people regularly did.
Even when working at the NCIS office, he couldn't work silently. When Kate had still been with them, he had been bickering with her, back and forth, on some occasions even for entire hours.
And still they had both been able to do their jobs, maybe even because of the constant noise. Tony had an inkling that Kate herself didn't like silence that much, either.
But ever since Kate was gone, the atmosphere in the office had changed. And with it, the sound level became different, too.
Ziva was, of course a very competent agent, but Tony just never felt the connection the way he had with Kate.
And at times, McGee just was too nervous and insecure to keep up a conversation with Gibbs in the room.
So bit by bit, silence in the office at the NCIS headquarters became more and more common.
Tony found himself missing the former talking that much that even the standard of his work started to show his discomfort.
But he also realized that the attitude and work climate among the whole team began to suffer from all the serious focus they put on their cases without any way of taking a break and finding a new perspective on their cases.
So more and more often, Tony found himself to be the solo entertainer of the team. At times Tony just would start talking, no matter if the theories he spat out were absolutely ridiculous or not.
He tried all alone to fill the hole that Kate had left.
And slowly he realized that the team would not work without someone, anyone who was willing to help to override the silence that threatened to overtake the office.
So Tony decided that he would not leave the team, till it was able to defy the silence on its own.