|The Joke's On You
Author: Manda-chan PM
How far will our favorite couple (S+S) go to humiliate and antagonize one another? Put on your helmets and run for the bomb shleters minna-san! The war is about to begin! ^^ R&R!Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 6,104 - Reviews: 129 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 4 - Updated: 07-20-01 - Published: 07-14-01 - id: 354781
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Heyla, Minna-san! Here's the first chapter of "The Joke's On You" (the first part was a prologue). Arigato to you all for reviewing! I feel I have a reason to write in the heat of this room (even though it's still hotter than Hades in here)!
I know the prologue was rather boring, but I promise that it gets much better! ^.^
THIS CHAPTER: S+S are going to put each other through hell! How far will our favorite couple go to humiliate and antagonize one another? Put on your helmets and run to the bomb shelters Minna-san! The war is about to begin! ^^ R&R please (if you can spare the time)!
Disclaimer: Okay, okay...CCS doesn't belong to me. Happy now?
Arigatos: A very, very big thank you to Gia, obiwankatie, ~*~Cutie Blossom~*~, C-chan, Brandy, Katie Marie, cherryblossom_s, heather, || Miss Ryouko ||, ~*Just a Memory*~, Shirazuki, "SAL", CreatiStar, katy, Samenia, ~*Princess Cherryblossom*~, Jurei-chan, jenna, demongirl, The Flower Child, raichi, Hikaru, SYKO, Joshy, CardCaptor Rasaku, Isis-chan, Aila, Skyfire K'vala, Ashley-chan, Leeman, phoenixangel, ~*Starlight Princess*~, silver_tiger1, Yuki Akuma, aurora manda, Secret, sakurablaze, Kero121, E.B., and Lep99 for reviewing the prologue!! ARIGATO SO MUCH!!! ^.^
The Joke's On You - Chapter One: This Means War!
At the crack of dawn on Friday morning, Syaoran was up and out of bed, ready to start his traditional morning rituals.
After changing into a pair of loose-fitting pants (somewhat like the leggings of his Chinese fighting robes) and an old gray t-shirt, he headed to his training room to have a good work out.
Placing himself in the center of the room, he released his magical sword from the pendant hanging around his neck and began swinging it in a fluid back-and-forth motion. Once more accustomed to the weight and feel of the blade, his movements became more and more complex and adverse. Just after about ten minutes from when he started, he was doing flips and swift diagonal cuts in all directions, filling the room with a blur of his smooth movements.
When his forty-five minute daily work out was over, he grabbed a towel from the side wall cabinet and headed for the shower.
In the recent past, he always found his morning shower to be fresh and stress-relieving experience.
However, today was different. There was something odd and...almost off about something. Could it have been the strangely sticky feeling of his shampoo? Or was it something else? He wasn't sure.
But he felt something strange in the air around him. Like there was something present that wasn't supposed to be there.
He frowned and glared around the small expanse of his bathroom. Not only was it out of place, but it was mysteriously familiar as well. Reaching out with his magical senses, he felt his eyes grow wide. 'What the...?!'
The air was stained pink. A magical light pink aura that hung like a thinning cloud.
He knew whose soft aura it was, but he didn't want to believe it. 'Am I just thinking about her too much?' he wondered.
He blinked at his own thought and shook his head vigorously, trying to shake off the stinging warmth from his cheeks. 'NO WAY!' he assured himself, 'I don't think about her! I only think about winning this contest!'
With a grunt, he left the bathroom and went to get his school uniform on. He felt an amused grin form on his lips as he adjusted the tie. 'She ought to get quite a surprise this morning.' he thought, his mood suddenly brightening.
Yet, he still couldn't keep his mind from wandering to the pink presence in his bathroom. He couldn't think of any reason for her to have been in there, besides trying to pull some kind of prank on him. 'If she did try something, I must have missed whatever it was.' he decided, making his way downstairs.
Too bad he didn't take a peek in the mirror that morning.......
Sakura's alarm went off as promptly as always, right at seven o'clock on the dot. She stretched out a lazy hand from beneath the consolating bed covers and snatched the ringing device from the shelf above her bed.
Without even opening her eyes, she smacked a button on top of the loud alarm clock, silencing it, and chucked it in a random direction off the side of her bed.
Sakura rubbed her eyes and gazed in the area from where she heard the painful cry. She blinked. "...Kero-chan?"
The golden mouse/bear-like creature rubbed the front of his face gingerly. "Watch where you're throwing that thing, Sakura! I was just getting out of the drawer and 'SLAM', your alarm clock rams right into the front of my face!!!"
Sakura yawned and sat up, pushing the bulk of her blankets away with her feet. "Sorry about that, Kero-chan," she apologized, hiding a chuckle behind her hand, "I wasn't really paying attention."
Kero frowned. "Here's an idea for you, Sakura. Next time your alarm goes off, GET UP!"
The Clow Mistress sweat-dropped. "It kind of...habit for me to sleep in."
Kero sighed and glided to her bed. "Just try to watch where you're hurling that clock. It's not as soft as being smacked with a pillow you know."
Sakura smiled and patted his head. "I know, Kero-chan. I'll be more careful from now on."
"By the way, Sakura. Where did you go to so late last night?"
Sakura sweat-dropped again, knowing that this wasn't going to make the little guardian beast too happy. "Li-kun's house..."
"THE GAKI'S HOUSE!?" Kero fumed, "WHAT IN THE WORLD WERE YOU DOING THERE!?"
Sakura laughed out loud at the thought of her visit.
Kero, however, wasn't amused. "What's so cotton-pickin' funny?" he asked, crossing his little yellow arms across his chest.
She shook her head, still giggling lightly. "Nothing, nothing." she assured.
The diminutive cerberus still didn't seem convinced. "Did he do anything to you!? If he did, I'll-"
"Calm down, Kero-chan! I didn't even see him!"
Kero blinked. "Then why did you go there?"
Sakura broke into a fit of laughter again, causing Kero to tilt his head in confusion. She finally calmed down and gave him an almost Eriol-like grin. "Just some...unfinished business to take care of."
Before Kero could ask anymore questions, she walked into the bathroom and shut the door. Kero was left sitting on her bed, still wondering about her strange behavior. "What's with her this morning?" he spoke aloud, scratching his little head.
Sakura opened the shower curtain and turned the hot water on, sticking her hand under the faucet so she could adjust the temperature.
But no water came out. She frowned and used her other hand to turn the knobs again, in case she had accidently messed something up.
Again, no water spurted out, not even a drop.
Just as she was about to pull her hand back and try something else, water gushed out of the shower nozzle above her head, spraying the side of her face and her right arm with chilly liquid. "COLD!" Sakura screeched.
She immediately pulled back from the gushing water and watched in horror as the liquid on her arm spread into ice, encasing her entire arm and part of her neck and head in a solid block. 'It's the Freeze Card!' she realized, 'Which means...'
"S-Y-A-O-R-A-N!!!" she screeched, trying not to chatter her teeth from the bitter feeling of the ice.
She dragged her frozen arm out of the bathroom. 'At least I decided to check adjust the water temperature first.' she thought, slightly relieved, 'Or else I would have become a block of ice!'
Kero turned around to greet his Mistress, but stopped short after taking in her unusual appearance. "WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU!?" he exploded, flying over to inspect Sakura's new 'glacial display'.
Sakura couldn't stop herself from shivering or her teeth from clattering. "N-N-Never m-mind t-t-that, K-Kero-chan. J-Just p-p-plug in t-the h-hair dryer, p-p-please."
Seeing Sakura's 'frozen' condition, the golden creature hurried to do as she asked.~
After Sakura finished 'thawing', she hurried to get her uniform on and dashed out downstairs and out the front door. 'And for once it isn't even my fault that I'm running late!' she thought, racing toward the high school as fast as her rollerblades would take her.
Upon reaching her destination, she sped down the sleek hallway, finally coming to a screeching halt at her locker. She quickly switched her footwear and slammed her locker shut. She made a wild dash to the classroom and threw the sliding door open, letting a relieved sigh out as she slumped into her seat near the window. 'I made it!'
"Ohayo, Sakura-chan!" Tomoyo's voice greeted.
Sakura turned to her best friend, smiling. "Ohayo, Tomoyo-chan."
Both friends were suddenly interrupted as the door opened, revealing none other than the male Card Captor, the person at fault for Sakura's 'icy shower' experience, Li Syaoran.
At first sight of his appearance though, Sakura tried desperately not to burst out laughing on the spot. 'And he doesn't even notice!' she thought.
One by one, students turned to stare at Syaoran as he walked over to his desk, some laughing quietly, others just plain amazed.
Finally realizing that the entire class was staring at him, Syaoran glared back at them. He couldn't figure out what was going on. "What?"
Sakura started laughing and rustled through the contents of her backpack, pulling out a large mirror. She placed it in front of the baffled Syaoran. "Have a look."
He glared at his reflection for a moment, then gasped, his amber eyes broadening considerably. "Oh...my...KAMI-SAMA!!!" he screamed in terror, rising from his seat, "WHAT HAPPENED TO MY HAIR!?"
It was indeed a rather amusing sight. Syaoran's hair was an almost olive green color, courtesy of Sakura.
The room erupted into laughter and Syaoran flew out the door at record speed, almost running into the sensei on his way out. After entering the boy's bathroom, he turned the water on in one of the sinks and stuck his head underneath it, praying that it wasn't a permanent dye.
To his relief, the sink began to color with a bright green liquid. 'Thank Kami-sama it's coming out.' he thought, occasionally toweling his hair with the school's paper towels.
He finished rinsing the green substance from his hair, returning it to it's original rich cinnamon color. "Curse you, Sakura!" he spat at the mirror, brushing through his damp strands with his hand, "This means WAR!"
He tossed the green-stained paper towels into the trash can and headed back to the classroom.
When he entered, most of the class turned around, but were surprised to see that his hair was back to its natural color. He ignored his gaping classmates and sat down in his seat, giving a glare to the chuckling Sakura in front of him.
"You're going to pay for that." he seethed.
Sakura gave him an impish grin. "Oh really?"
Tomoyo tapped Sakura's shoulder. "Demo...What's wrong, Sakura-chan?"
Sakura blinked, tearing her gaze from Syaoran. "What?"
Tomoyo looked generally worried. "You look a little blue, Sakura-chan."
The female Card Captor gasped. 'I totally forgot!' she thought, looking down at her bluish-colored arm.
Syaoran grinned at the sight of her arm, glad that his prank had also worked. "Ah, yes! Did you have a nice COLD shower this morning?" Syaoran questioned.
Sakura glowered at him. "None of your business."
His grin only grew wider. "Daidouji-san is right, y'know. You seem a little BLUE today."
"And would that have anything to do with you, Li-kun?" Sakura challenged.
He pointed a finger to himself, mocking a hurt look. "Me? Do you really think I would do something like that?"
"Shove it, Li-kun. I'll get you back for that later."
The two of them started a glaring war in the back of the room, silently racking for ideas to torture their rival with.
"I see that you're both off to a good start." Eriol spoke up.
The Card Capting duo turned to him. He clapped his hands together lightly. "And what worthy pranks they were!" Eriol continued, still applauding, "Definitely worthy of my approval."
Tomoyo sighed, pulling out her camera. "Had it not been for the great opportunity to film my Sakura-chan," Tomoyo started, training her video camera on Sakura's face, "I would want nothing at all to do with this contest." She put her camera down abruptly, eying both Sakura and Syaoran. "Demo...don't you think you two have fought enough already?"
Syaoran crossed his arms. "If she admits that I'm better than her, I would be more than glad to put a stop to this once and for all."
Sakura rolled her eyes. "In your dreams, Li-kun."
Syaoran half smirked. "You know I'm better than you are, it seems that you're just too embarrassed to admit it."
Sakura stomped down on his foot, causing him to bite his lip in an attempt to hold back a yelp. "At least that got you to shut your big mouth."
They glared at each other again, while Tomoyo and Eriol sweat-dropped at the scene before them.
The videographer/costume designer sighed, placing a hand on her forehead. "When will they stop?"
"Just trust me, Tomoyo-san." Eriol assured, "Everything will work out better than you could have imagined."
When lunchtime came, Syaoran kept a vigil on Sakura from the shadows, scheming his revenge. As Sakura was walking with her friends, he called upon a Clow Card. It obediently came to his waiting hand, as the Clow Cards were instructed to do by Sakura.
He took pendant from around his neck and released his Clow blade from within. In one swift motion, he brought the sword's tip in contact with the card, releasing its power. "Time!"
The Time Card worked its magic, and quickly spread over the area, ceasing every little person and thing right in their tracks. Syaoran smirked and dashed to where Sakura's group was walking, stooping to the Clow Mistress's feet.
He tied the laces of her school shoes together, fixing a tight knot between the two.
He admitted that it wasn't the best prank he could come up with, but it served as a small victory for him. Now he would get to see her trip and fall on her face.
Returning to where the glowing card still lay, he picked it up and commanded the spirit to return, also resealing his sword at the same time.
The Time Card's magic immediately wore off, putting the world's actions back in motion.
"HOE!" Sakura yelped, trying to take a step, but falling flat on her face.
A chorus of four girls gasped. "Sakura-chan!"
Sakura finally noticed that her shoelaces were tied together and quickly undid them. 'That must be his lame idea of a joke.' she thought.
She heard laughing in the distance and gazed over at the side of the school. She glared at the familiar amber-eyed boy, who was waving the Time Card at her triumphantly.
She got up off the ground and ran over to where he was still standing.
Syaoran couldn't help but laugh louder at the sight of her angry face. "What's the matter, Kinomoto? Got a boo-boo?"
In response, she kicked the area just above his left ankle as hard as she could.
"Itai!" he yelled, hopping around on one foot.
Sakura left him to suffer, walking away without as much as a single word.
The rest of the school day flew by rather quickly. Even though they had almost all the same classes, Sakura and Syaoran didn't play pranks on each other during class.
However, Sakura had planted something for him to find shortly after the bell rang. She smiled at the thought. 'He is certainly going to be surprised.' she thought, rising from her chair as the final bell rang, 'And there's no way I'm going to miss this.'
She followed Syaoran into the hallway, watching as he put the combination into his locker dial. She stifled a giggle, trying not to alert him to anything.
As soon as Syaoran pulled the locker door open....*SPLAT*
Sakura burst into a fit of giggles, falling to the floor in uncontrollable laughter.
There stood Syaoran, one hand on the open door of his locker, and a whipped cream pie stuck onto the front of his face.
He peeled it off and glared at Sakura, who only laughed even harder at the creamy white substance that molded over his face perfectly. She flashed the Lock Card at him, still rolling with laughter.
"Very funny." Syaoran muttered.
Sakura finally picked herself off the newly-waxed hallway floor, wiping away a few laughter-induced tears from her eyes. Syaoran walked over to her. "That was very childish y'know."
She waved him off. "I know, I know. But it was worth it!"
"Was it?" he questioned.
"Of course it wa-"
Sakura was silenced as the Syaoran pushed the pie in her face. She detached the pan, revealing her own cream-covered face. Syaoran chuckled. "Looks like your little prank backfired."
Amazingly, Sakura didn't even get mad. She stood there for a moment, then whacked him playfully with the pie pan. "That was uncalled for!" she laughed.
Syaoran blinked. 'She thinks it's funny?'
Sakura took her index finger and ran it along the side of his face, collecting some of the whipped cream. She licked it off her finger. "It still tastes good." she said with a smile.
At that particular moment, Syaoran was glad that his face was covered, or she might have seen how red his face was.
He wiped some cream off her cheek and tried it. "You're right, that is pretty good."
The two cream-faced teens looked in the direction of the voice, almost gasping when they saw who it was.
"Tomoyo-chan!" Sakura realized, turning red beneath the protection of the cream.
Tomoyo continued taping the couple, refusing to lose a second of the footage. "That was so kawaii!" she gushed, "And I got the whole thing on tape!"
Syaoran raised a fist at the smiling videographer. "Don't you dare show that to ANYONE, Daidouji!"
Before either of them could say another word, he took off, partially wiping his face as he ran. 'Just 'cuz she's cute doesn't mean I'm giving up.' he thought, calling for the Dash Card as he left the school grounds. He blinked. ''Cute?' He smacked his head to erase the thought.
Remembering his task, he used Dash to get back to his apartment quickly, grab a few things from there, and run to Sakura's house faster than the eye could catch. 'And this will be too easy to pull off.'
After Syaoran left the building, Sakura tried to call forth the Dash Card, hoping to pull off another prank before Syaoran could get back to his apartment. But the Dash Card didn't come on command, and Sakura realized that Syaoran must be using it. 'But for what?' she wondered, taking a large white container from her locker, 'Is he trying to pull another prank on me too?'
Shrugging off her current thoughts, she called the Windy Card and asked it for a lift. It smiled at its Mistress and nodded, quickly bringing Sakura to where she desired. "Thank you." she told Windy, then sealed it back in its magical card form.
"Let's see just how much you like this, Syaoran." she spoke aloud, using the Through Card to enter the apartment.
Sakura finished her 'business' in Syaoran's apartment, and headed back home, gloating silently over her victory. 'If only I could stay and see his reaction.' she thought with a sigh.
After walking in the front door, she made her way up to her room, smiling widely. She threw her door open, not even keeping her eyes open for pranks. "I'm back Kero-ch-"
Sakura stood in the doorway of her room, soaked from head to toe. She blinked and looked upwards, frowning at the empty bucket and little contraption that Syaoran must have built. "Very funny, Syaoran." she muttered sarcastically, squeezing excess water from her hair.
"Kero-chan, where are you!?" Sakura demanded, appalled that her trusted guardian didn't even notice that Syaoran had been in her room.
Kero looked up at his drenched and dripping Mistress from the desk, his little golden face smeared with chocolate pudding. "Oh, hiya Sakura!" he greeted casually.
Sakura sloshed over to her small companion and gave him a glare that rivaled the death glare of Li Syaoran. "What do you mean 'Hiya'?!" she exploded, "Why did you let Syaoran in here!?"
The tiny creature put his chocolate-covered paws up in defense. "I couldn't help it, Sakura! He had chocolate pudding! And he told me that if I let him put that thing up and didn't tell you about it, he would give me the pudding!"
Sakura sighed and headed for the bathroom to wash up. "Oh, you and your stomach." she muttered.**************************************
Syaoran opened his front door, and grinned at the sudden vision of a soaked and cursing Sakura. 'It would be a pity if she doesn't like water. I'd pay good money to see the look on her face though.'
He strode to his refrigerator, searching for a beverage to quench his thirst. His eyes landed on the container of milk. 'That looks good.' he decided, 'And as they say, 'Milk. It does a body good.' He picked up the carton of milk and went to go and pour a glass.
After putting the carton back in the fridge, he took the cup in his hand and took a large swig. As soon as the heavy white liquid touched his tongue, he spit it up all over the floor. "WHAT THE HELL?!" he yelled, trying to rid his mouth of the disgusting, sticky white liquid, "GLUE!?!?"
How'd you like it, Minna-san? Was it at least a little funny? As long as I can keep thinking of pranks, I'll continue with the series. However, I still have to get S+S together too! ^^
Will you review please? I slaved away the week in that room to get this out as quickly as I could. I usually work at night lately, but it still gets SO hot in that room (the heat from the computer maybe?). Anyway, I would be very grateful if you spared a few words to tell me what you thought. Arigato!
PLEASE SEND ME ANY IDEAS YOU MAY HAVE FOR PRANKS OR JOKES!!! THE MORE THERE ARE, THE LONGER THE SERIES WILL LAST! BUT I NEED YOUR HELP, MINNA-SAN! If you have a few ideas, please send them to me at: email@example.com I WILL GIVE YOU CREDIT, SO PLEASE HELP ME OUT!!! Thank you. ~Manda-chan