Warning 1: The Italian Job movie nor the HP Universe belong to me, sadly.

Warning 2: SLASH WARNING LATER ON.

Warning 3: Alt. Universe and First Fic alert. You’ve been warned.

Pairing: HP-DM and various others /b

The Italian Job

Draco Malfoy normally liked his sleep, but something told him to answer the phone when it rang shrilly early that morning. Picking up the receiver, he groaned, “Hello?”

“Hello, son.”

“Father,” and Draco smiled sleepily. “Good morning.”

“Morning,” chuckled the rich voice. “Happy birthday, my boy.”

“Thanks… where are you? Come over and we’ll celebrate in style,” and Draco waggled his eyebrows; even though he knew his father couldn’t see him, he would know. “We’ll have a nice expensive breakfast.”

“I can’t, Drake… I’m in Venice.”

Draco immediately woke up. “You’re doing a job,” he accused.

In Venice, Lucius Malfoy laughed. “Last one, I promise.”

“You said that in Vienna, and now you’re in Venice.”

“Something about those cities that start with a V… but I promise you, this is the last one,” Lucius said as he studied the city.

“Will you be home at all today?”

“I will… but in the mean time, go enjoy the world… maybe pick up a chick or a lad-”

“Father!”

Lucius stifled a laugh at the indignant tone in his son’s voice. “Kidding. Seriously? You should find someone who’ll make you happy. Life isn’t meant to be lived alone.”

“Says the man who never looked at another woman after Mother died,” snorted Draco. “Say hi to the gang for me.”

“Will do… see you tonight, son. Love you.”

“I love you too Dad.”

“Oh, and son? Enjoy the present,” and with a grin, Lucius shut the phone off, knowing that miles away, another indignant shriek would fill his son’s apartment.

“You really cannot resist teasing him, can you?” A warm chuckle filled the air as a young man fell in step. “Really, what kind of father sends his son a vibrator?”

“The kind that knows to placate him with a real gift to make him forget the gag gift,” Lucius responded. “I’ve been hanging out with Fred and George too much.”

“I thought so. What’d you get him?”

“A couple of history books he’s been pining after… along with several ancient coins to add to his collection.”

“History buff, huh…I thought he had your business talent?”

“Our business isn’t for him. Besides, I have quite the heir for this business, eh Harry?” and Lucius lightly punched his companion’s arm.

Harry Potter laughed. “You ready, old man?”

“Readier than ever.”

Side waterway of Venice

“Oi, Neal.”

“Shut up, Fred.”

“How’d you know?”

“I socked your other half about fifteen minutes ago.”

“Huh, well, I was wondering-”

“Don’t even think about it.”

Blaise listened halfheartedly the banter as he waited for their other members to show up. “Do you mind not drawing attention to us?”

“It’s how we work, Blaise, and you know it,” grinned Fred.

“Lucky me,” grumbled the woman sitting in the powerboat.

“You asked for it, Neal, when Lucius offered you a permanent spot,” teased Blaise.

“I did not ask for getting propositioned, leered at, and manhandled. I signed up to be a thief. Forgive me if I didn’t assume that the perks went with the job,” drawled Neal as she typed at her laptop.

“Typical Neal, all bark and bite,” sighed George, nursing his cheek.

“You think we can pull this baby off?” cut in Fred.

“It’s Harry’s baby, and he learned from Lucius. A far safer bet than trusting you hooligans,” retorted Neal.

“St. Petersburg was nearly perfect!” defended George.

“Except you forgot the doddering old guardsman and the aquarium,” grinned Blaise.

“We talking Petey here?” asked a new voice. “Nearly lost out on that one… but it was exciting.”

“You would side with the bloody menaces, Sirius,” sighed Neal. “We ready then?”

“Yeah, Tommy boy’s in position. Tucked him in nice and safely,” and Sirius grinned.

“Pile in, boys, its show time” Everyone looked up and grinned as Lucius and Harry approached. Harry grinned. “Let’s go thieving.”

The powerboat roared to life.

“Macnair House, boys, pile out. Neal, stats?”

“Security layers are spectacular. They scream testosterone,” grinned the woman.

“Oh get laid already. Blaise, haven’t you charmed her into your bed yet?” demanded Fred.

“I’ll think about it,” drawled Blaise as he began the prep work, ignoring the dirty look Neal threw at him. “We reach Riddler yet?”

“It’s Tom, Blaise, not Riddle, not Riddler, not Tommy boy.” The static could not hide the crisp coolness of the voice that emanated from their earpieces.

“Settle down, boys. You ready to paint, Tom?” asked Lucius.

“Send the order.”

“You heard the man, Neal, where do you want him?”

“Let’s see… thirteen feet to the right and twelve feet down from the northeast, ten-by-eight,” supplied Neal.

“Paint away, men.”

Tom carefully fixed the tiny package to a corner of the wet square. “In position.”

A few yards below, Sirius echoed his words. Harry glanced at the boat. “Ready?”

“Born ready-”

“Fearless leader!” The twins saluted, identical grins on their faces.

“What they said,” grinned Sirius. “Good luck, kiddo.”

“You too, Paddy,” said Harry. “Stay in one piece, will you? Dad’ll kill me when I get to Heaven.”

“That’s my line,” laughed Sirius.

“Hate to break in on cozy family time, but we’re on a deadline,” came Tom’s voice over the radio.

“Yeah, yeah, see ya at the checkpoint,” and George shut the radio off. “Has he always been that bitchy?” he asked conversationally.

Neal snorted. “I’ve yet to see him smile.”

“Says our favorite ice queen,” teased Lucius, patting her shoulder. She mock glared at him, but chuckled anyway.

“He has a point though; we should get going or we’ll cut it close. Positions,” ordered Harry. Everyone scurried. “Let ‘er rip, Sirius.”

Sirius grinned. “And it goes BOOM!” He pressed the button on the control he’d been holding.

The explosion only startled the guards. The disappearing safe, however…

“Mala suerte!” one swore. “Call the police; you’re the only one that speaks Italian! Boss’ll have our heads!” He looked down to see a speedboat race away and cursed again. “After them!”

Chaos filled Macnair House, but no one noticed the strange man slipping out.

A team of boats chased after the boat, and Sirius looked behind them. “Company for dinner, boys!” he crowed. He cocked his head as the sound sirens began to fill the air. “In-laws too!”

“Excellent,” grinned Fred. “Drive, George m’man, drive!”

George gave him the thumbs up without turning around and sped up. Sirius squawked with surprise and grabbed on, but he grinned as they zoomed past two gondolas, causing the row of police boats to swerve and crash into the docks. God damn, but he loved thieving!

Macnair House, under the docks

“She’s a beauty, isn’t she?” signed Harry to Lucius.

Lucius grinned and signed back “It’s a Nimbus 2000, of course it is.” They, along with Blaise and Neal, had dived into the water after the twins and Sirius had taken off with a fake replica of the safe, swimming towards the real safe.

“Good luck,” signed Blaise. Lucius nodded and directed his attention to the safe. He twirled the dial experimentally before focusing on it.

A shadow passed overhead, and they looked up in alarm.

“They’re early,” signed Neal.

“Not a problem; they have no idea where we are,” signed Harry. “Macnair probably called them so it’d be less suspicious for him.

“He’s just an honest man who has been robbed, poor guy,” signed Blaise, and Harry and Neal chuckled.

A large clunk made them turn, and Harry stopped breathing for a minute. Gold sparkled at them, their beauty unmarred by the water swirling into the safe.

“Jackpot,” signed Lucius, and they could see him grin around the mouthpiece attached to his airtank.

“There’s a lot more in there than what the employer said,” signed Neal.

“Finder’s keepers, love,” signed Blaise. “It’s in the contract, and besides, it’s not Macnair’s anyway.”

Harry motioned them over. “Let’s go.”

“Three down, three to go.” Sirius grinned at George, who took a break. “Nice driving.”

“Thank you,” and George bowed from his seat. “I live to entertain.”

“I thought you lived to thieve.”

“That too.” George suddenly grinned. “That brother of mine…”

Sirius followed his gaze. “Good lord,” he breathed. He reached for the seat belt next to him. George followed suit.

Ahead was a construction site, and in the middle was a floating ramp where boats could park so building materials could be taken up. Fred sped up, and they flew up the ramp. The ramp cracked under the weight, but they managed to make it over. They soared over the bridge and two crossing barges. Sirius grinned at the sounds of crashing and cursing as they landed on the water hard. “Next time, I’m driving.”

“Have a good time?” asked Harry as the boat crew strolled up.

“Brilliant,” grinned Sirius. “I feel young again.”

“Fresh air does that to old geezers, Siri,” teased Neal.

“Sirius-ly! I am very Sirius when I say that!”

Everyone groaned. “How do you put up with him, Har?” asked Blaise.

“He’s my godfather and only family, so I don’t. I sic ‘im on some other poor soul.” Harry grinned broadly.

“There’s a mate for you,” mock-grumbled George.

“Best kind there is,” added Fred.

“There’s Tom,” Harry remarked. “You’re late,” he said teasingly as the last member of their team approached.

“I was delayed,” Tom said smoothly.

“Tommy boy!” squealed Sirius. “You came!”

“Not like you to be late, Riddler,” smirked Blaise.

Tom scowled. “For the last time, it’s Tom.”

“But that’s no fun,” pouted Fred.

“You can have your fun once we finish the drop off with the employer,” rebuked Lucius gently. “Off you go… Harry and I’ll finish up here. We’ll meet you in the van.”

The team took off, joking and laughing. Lucius smiled at Harry. “Well done.”

“That was the best case scenario,” grinned Harry. “You got done early, giving us time to get it all… I’m proud of you,” he added, smiling at his mentor and friend.

“I had a feeling Macnair would be using a Nimbus,” said Lucius. “And my skills are the best in the market,” he said haughtily. Harry poked him in the ribs, and they laughed.

“It is good to know thieves can laugh,” remarked a new voice. “Well done.”

“Your order, Mr. Lestrange,” said Harry, immediately becoming business-like. “In full.”

“Macnair never was smart that way,” Lestrange sniffed. “He could get his hands on gold, but never keep it.” He inspected the gold, taking his time counting. “Yes… my beauties are all here. You can tell from the insignia of the lion and snake… very rare, it is.” He looked up. “You’ll be wanting your payment. As promised, since you delivered early, twenty percent is yours; one hundred and twenty bricks.” He looked slightly sour, but a deal was a deal, and this was not a group to cross. His men went to place the promised gold into four cases and gave them to Lucius and Harry. “It was nice doing business with you, gentleman. If I ever require your services again, I will be in contact. Good bye.”

Harry nodded, though glee filled him. With fifteen bricks per member, it was easily twenty million per person, but with the extra gold they had… Neal estimated that with the division of the gold, everyone would an extra twelve million, totaling thirty two million per person. It was the steal of their lifetimes, and he’d planned and executed without a hitch. When they were sure Lestrange and his men were gone, Harry let out a whoop, hugged Lucius, and jumped around in glee. Lucius laughed and watched, letting his student enjoy his success.

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Mala Suerte bad luck in Spanish, I think.

Reviews are nice! Please? For a first fic authoress?