Disclaimer:

Missing and The Last Song I'm Wasting On You © Amy Lee

Bionicle © Lego

Arya, Arianna, Lavina, Krystal and Krysta © Arya Toa Metru of Elements

You forgot me long ago.

Am I that unimportant...?

Am I so insignificant...?

Isn't something missing?

Isn't someone missing me?

…

…

…

Please, please forgive me,

But I won't be home again.

I know what you do to yourself,

I breathe deep and cry out;

"Isn't something missing?

Isn't someone missing me?”

Even though I'm the sacrifice,

You won't try for me, not now.

Though I'd die to know you love me,

I'm all alone.

Isn't someone missing me?

And if I bleed, I'll bleed,

Knowing you don't care.

And if I sleep just to dream of you

I'll wake without you there,

Isn't something missing?

Isn't something...”

Missing; Evanescence

Isn't someone missing me?

I loved you. And you betrayed me.

Sparkling grey, in my own veins

Any more than a whisper

Any sudden movement of my heart

And I know, I know I'll have to watch them pass away

Just get through this day

Sure, I betrayed you guys first, but you don’t even know what happened! I didn’t want to be evil. I was just scared…I was so damn scared… I was a seventeen-year-old Hordika victim, and a man I didn’t like, but still trusted deeply had just raped me. He was my leader, the leader of my team. He told me lies…and even worse he told me the truth. I knew my real parents were Toa. What I never knew, was that they were kicked off their team because they betrayed their fellow Toa, and now they were DarkHunters. He said you guys would hate me, that you would never accept me. He said I would never see my girls again.

Brave, little Arianna, bright-eyed energetic Lavina, and smart, quiet Krysta. My beautiful girls… Would my husband still love me? I needed to know. The girls adored their father. He shook his head; he said that Matau would be afraid of me. He won’t love me anymore.

Oh, Mata Nui, that hurt the most. The one man who cared for me when my “father”, Lhikan was still alive. Lhikan was a drunk. He beat me all the time. I would always have to lie about where I got these bruises, or how I broke my arm, or where I got a black eye. No one would ever suspect that their great hero Toa Lhikan was a child abuser. He blamed me for his wife, Kaylani’s death. And his brother’s. Shruikan. And his sister-in-law’s. Nina.

Give up your way, you could be anything,

Give up my way,

and lose myself,

not today

That's too much guilt to pay

Sickened in the sun

You dare tell me you love me

But you held me down and screamed you wanted me to die

Honey you know, you know I'd never hurt you that way

You're just so pretty in your pain

I'm so confused! I don’t know what to do anymore! I thought he had killed you. I was so angry. I wanted to kill him. So I tried to. But you weren’t dead. I was so surprised. He kicked me off, and I fell over the edge. You had my hand, and I could see in your eyes, you still loved me! I felt the Hordika sink down back inside my chest, and I had control again. But then HE convinced you to let me go. I fell, although it was a short fall, it felt like an eternity. When I hit the ground fifty feet down, I fractured my leg, broke my arm and fracture and bruised three ribs.

You guys were the only family I’ve ever know. Onewa, the over-protective big brother that would be standing on the veranda with a shotgun as a boy took me out on a date. Nokama, the big sister I would say up late with, sharing secrets, giggling and talking about boys. Nuju, the smart older brother who would always be annoyed with my constant question’s about how things worked and such. Whenua, the brother that would help me study, and would protect me when I was in danger. Matau, the boy Onewa would have the shotgun aimed at. My lover. My protector and my best friend. I miss you guys…

Give up my way, and I could be anything

I'll make my own way

Without your senseless hate...hate...hate...hate

So run, run, run

And hate me, if it feels good

I can't hear your screams anymore

I'm seriously considering sticking my sword into my abdomen. I really don’t want this baby. He fucking raped me, and now I'm pregnant. I hate him. I hate my life. This really sucks. My life was finally turning around for the better, and then; whoop-de-doo! “Super Dad” comes along and fucks it up again. I swear, someone up there is out to get me. That, or they think this is all hilariously funny, and they’re doing this to me for their own amusement.

You lied to me

But I'm older now

And I'm not buying baby

I'm not going to let this control my life. You guys forgot a hell of a lot of matoran here. Maybe I’ll get lucky and the triplets will be among them. Who knows? But I'm taking charge. I’ll survive. Yeah, it hurts, but I’ll get over it. I’ll restore Metru-Nui and then I’ll get a court to sign some divorce papers. I'm strong. I can do this! I’m a Toa.

I am…

Demanding my responses

Don't bother breaking the door down

I found my way out

Arya Marie Mahi. Toa Metru of Elements, and Mother of four. And no one will ever pull me down, again.

And you'll never hurt me again

A/N: I wrote this to explain Arya’s feeling after she’s abandoned/“killed” by her Team. I’ll have another fic explaining more up soon.

R&R!!!!!!!!