Disclaimer: The characters of CCS belong to CLAMP. The idea of this plot and this kind of future world belongs to me, Waltz Alone.

Short Summary: Syaoran gazes at me with shame and struggle. I close my eyes and pull him towards me, whispering, “It's alright…” Nothing more is said as his sharp teeth plunge into my throat, filling the air with the scent of blood…

Full Summary: Sakura is a Vampire Hunter in a future world where scientists have tampered with human DNAs to create half-humans. Five years ago, every experimental half-human broke free from the labs and cells, blending into the human population. Therefore, it is now up to the Hunters to track them down and kill them. Sakura believes it is right to hunt down vampires… until a horrifying incident awakens her from the pretence of it all – she slowly uncovers the truth behind how and why half-humans were created, and why they escaped. With fellow Hunters and half-humans hot on her tail, she sets out with her partner, Syaoran, with a goal to discover the truth and define what’s right and wrong.

Genre: Romance / Drama / Action / Adventure

Author’s Note: Thank you all so much for all those lovely reviews and your support! It means a lot to me :) I’m going to be very busy with school this year, so please understand my tardy updated T-T

NOTE: Never have I stated that Syaoran needs Stella’s blood to not become insane, as it is in Vampire Knight. The world I’m trying to portray is entirely different from Vampire Knight’s, and I described in the second chapter that Syaoran needs a CONSTANT blood source to not go crazy, and it doesn’t matter who it is. Syaoran is simply drawn to Stella’s blood because she’s his maker.

NOTE2: The majority of the readers HAVE voted that it should be M. I’ll be adding more details to previous chapters to suit the new M rating.

MUSIC: And if you’re into Korean music, listen to Big Bang’s Day by Day with this story. I LOVE the song, and I think it goes well with this entire plot. :D (the lyrics are awesome) If you’re into Japanese music, check out YUI’s Tomorrow’s Way. And for the English music listeners, Evanescence’s My Immortal. These three songs suit this story well, I think. :D

Thanks once more for all your positive feedback and patience! :)

PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW! Reviews motivate me to update more often :D

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ஐ +Vampire Hunter+ ஐ

Chapter 16 - Tears

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“The sin of pride may be a small or a great thing in someone's life, and hurt, vanity a passing pinprick, or a self-destroying or ever murderous obsession.”

- Iris Murdoch

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I stare at the sight before me, my heart suddenly too loud for my own ears.

Clutching the towel tightly around my body, I let out a shuddering gasp as I see Stella passionately grab Syaoran’s hair, pulling him even closer to her throat. I can’t see Syaoran’s face. I could only see his hands gripping Stella’s shoulders.

He’s holding her as intensely as he was holding me last night.

My mind is blank.

Stella is laughing again, murmuring some words I can’t decipher at the moment. Syaoran’s lower, shorter reply follows. I literally feel my heart ripping apart.

I can’t stand this anymore.

Shutting my eyes tightly, I rush back into the room, not caring that my towel dropped from my body. My eyes are stinging with angry tears, and my mind is now in a blind rage. I refuse to cry. I refuse to shed tears for them.

I want to kill her.

I want to kill him.

I want to kill me.

My legs storm into the bathroom, and my hands move according to their own will. I’m all but fuming as I feel my hands wildly search the drawers until they finally find what they want: a pair of scissors. My mind is filled with images of me spilling my own blood onto the tiles, to the point where I collapse onto the tiles, colorless and lifeless. I can see Syaoran walking in, terror dawning over his face, his mouth still stained with Stella’s blood… What will he do then? Follow me in death to atone for what he’s done to me? Will he take the scissors from my dead hands and end his own life? Will he just go off to be with Stella?

What the hell am I thinking?

I come to an abrupt halt. My eyes suddenly refocus, taking in the situation I’m in. My hand is an inch away from my outstretched forearm, the sharp blade ready to tear my skin apart. My breaths are ragged and irregular. I see myself in the mirror. Naked, kneeling over my own arm, a moment away from ripping it open.

What the fuck am I doing?

Though my hands begin to tremble, I can’t let go of the scissors.

My eyes widen as my hands don’t listen to me. They won’t move away from my arm. It’s as if all my nerve endings have been cut off from my fingers. One finger digs into the blade, sending droplets of thick, red blood onto the tiles. I don’t feel the pain. I don’t feel anything. Silent tears finally escape my eyes.

“Sakura.”

I flinch at the deep voice. But I can’t quite move yet. My lips are quivering.

Surprisingly gentle hands free my fingers from the scissors, tossing them far away from me. The same hands drape a nearby robe over my shoulders, pulling me upwards. I catch a whiff of a clean, crisp scent.

“Leonard,” I manage to whisper.

“Dear God, you’re a mess,” he raises his eyebrows, “I leave you for a few weeks, and you’re already suicidal?”

I don’t even have the mind to laugh. I feel myself being settled onto the bed, and I don’t protest when he lies down beside me, pulling me into his arms. I even let him suck on the cut on my finger. I watch him clean the blood away with a blank look. I vaguely remember Syaoran doing the same thing when I cut myself with the newspaper. It seems so long ago.

“You know, my offer still stands,” he muses.

The offer of him fucking me senseless before turning me into a Vampire? I don’t think so. I want to say this, but I can’t bring myself to speak.

He sighs. “You can’t really blame Syaoran for going off with Stella. The poor bloke was on the verge of going on a massacre to quench his thirst,” he strokes my hair, “If he tried to satisfy his increasing thirst with you, you wouldn’t be here right now.”

My lip twitches, and I’m able to say, “I know that.”

“Do you?” Leonard asks skeptically.

“I do,” I finally snap, bolting up and away from his touch. “I know damn well that Syaoran and Stella have some damn bond between them, and it can’t be helped. But that doesn’t mean it doesn’t piss the hell out of me. What’s worse is that he had sex with me for the entire night, as if he loved me, and now he’s off drinking off of that woman!” I choke out the last few words.

Leonard stares at me. Then he begins to laugh. “Oh, Sakura, what a fine Vampire you would make. So emotional, so jealous, so…” he pauses, “Unstable.”

I glare at him. “Don’t you assume that I’m going to just offer myself up to you like a piece of meat, Vampire! I’m not going to let you do what you want with me!” I begin to scream.

He just continues to chuckle. “How ironic is this? You keep refusing to become a Vampire, yet you already think like one,” Leonard’s crimson eyes gleam eerily as he gazes at me, “Vampires refuse to yield to anyone. Naturally, if there was love or sex involved, that’s a different story,” he chuckles again, “And every Vampire has an extreme, reckless, possessive nature.”

“You contradict yourself,” I hiss, “You yield to me all the time; you let Stella chase after Syaoran; you don’t even have the guts to take me by force.”

Suddenly, a terrifying look flashes across Leonard’s red eyes, causing me to freeze in fear. I’d originally planned on insulting him further, but the words are stuck in my throat.

He smiles dangerously, revealing his deadly fangs. He strokes my face with mocking gentleness. “Miss Sakura Kinomoto,” he purrs, “I don’t yield to you. I just like toying with you. I merely allow Stella to go after Syaoran because all she wants to do with him is to play. And frankly, I do have the guts to take you by force.” As if to reinforce his statement, Leonard seizes me by the chin and throws me on the bed beneath him. A violent jolt of fear rushes through my veins at the sight of him. I am utterly terrified of this Vampire. He’s beautiful – an eerie kind of beauty with his dangerous, crimson eyes, unshakeable authority and confidence… He’s a lot like how Syaoran used to be. “But I am not your everyday Vampire,” he smirks, caressing my lips, “I am King over all those brash weaklings. I can control myself better than humans.”

I shudder as he eyes my nearly-naked body. He gives an easy laugh before stepping off of me. “Don’t underestimate my self-control, though. I think it’s best you don’t forget that I am dangerous. I’m much more dangerous than your Syaoran will ever be,” he pauses, “Although to you personally, he may be the more lethal one.” I exhale sharply at this statement, unable to stop the trembling of my lips.

As he turns to leave, my brain suddenly clicks. Ignoring my newly instilled fear of Leonard, I speak up. “Leonard,” I call out hoarsely, “I saw you on the Crimson Night, didn’t I?”

He pauses at the balcony door. Slowly, he turns around to face me. “Pardon me?”

I repress the shivers threatening to break out at his dangerously sweet tone. “I remember seeing you. There’s no mistaking those red eyes.”

He stares at me for a long time before finally chuckling. “Now that you mention it, I think I do recall seeing a very frightened emerald-eyed girl.”

I swallow hard, dreading to say this. “Do you remember seeing… my parents?” I force out, “My father had the same hair color as me and wore glasses. My mother had silver hair and the same eyes as me.”

Leonard’s eyes bore into mine, and I desperately try to read his mind. But I can’t decipher what he’s thinking. It seems like eternity passes. He lets out a quiet laugh. “How could I forget seeing that woman? She was stunning,” he smiles, “Do you really want to know?”

I bite my lip and silently nod, clearing out my doubts and worries.

“I first saw them when I was still in that stinking lab,” he says bitterly, “They were tremendously outraged over... What they were pissed over is not important right now,” he smiles a bit, “Anyways, your mother, being the beauty she was, began to beat the daylights out of all the scientists in the lab. Stunned all of us into silence,” he chuckles at the memory. My lower lip begins to tremble. “When your parents left, the scientists were beyond livid. And I heard them say these exact words: “They must be silenced.””

I stare at him.

“Then I saw them again on the Crimson Night,” he pauses, “They were murdered. Shot to death by a group of Hunters, just before… the Night unfolded.”

I continue to stare at him. As I digest his words, my eyes widen in horror.

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The Assassination Order of Fujitaka and Nadeshiko Kinomoto.

Charges: Traitors of the Barastelle, revolted against the General, attempted to assault the General, defended the half-humans, possible perpetrators of the Crimson Night.

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I vividly remember the words on the documents. I had them imprinted into my mind the moment I saw them.

“B-Before… they broke out?” I manage to ask.

“Before,” he confirms, watching me collapse to the floor.

“They… They didn’t… perpetrate the Crimson Night?”

“What nonsense are you talking about? Of course they didn’t,” he scoffs, “Your parents made quite an impression on everyone at that lab on the day they confronted the scientists. They were good people. And coming from me, that is something,” he flashes a smirk.

Tears fall out of my eyes. But this time, they’re happy tears. My parents are guiltless. They didn’t do anything wrong. They’re good. “But why were they murdered?” I finally whisper.

Leonard hesitates to answer. “Because they were good,” he finally says, “The Barastelle was corrupted. It still is. That bloody General Churchill needs to go to hell.”

Did the General blame my parents as perpetrators of the Night to somehow… justify murdering them? My blood boils at the thought. I clench my fists, angrily wiping my tears away. I pick myself up, securing the robe around my body. But I’m also so relieved – relieved that my parents are innocent. It’s as if a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulder.

I walk up to Leonard and wrap my arms around him. “Thank you,” I whisper.

He chuckles and pats my back. “It’s time for us to part,” he plants a seemingly innocent kiss on my forehead, “Don’t do anything rash while I’m gone.”

“Get out of here,” I say with a small smile. After Leonard’s gone, I let out a sigh and slump down onto the bed, staring at the ceiling.

My head is hurting.

What’s right and what’s wrong?

Who’s good and who’s evil?

I so quickly believed that my parents were guilty… but they turned out to be innocent.

I thought that the Barastelle was the only good… but it’s coming after Syaoran and me, even though we didn’t do anything to harm others.

One would assume that Leonard is evil… but he’s not. After all, he came all the way here to stop me from doing something stupid, going as far as to clearing out my confusions.

I bury my face in my hands, laughing quietly to myself. What a predicament.

Then I hear the door opening, and familiar footsteps walking into the room.

I don’t bother to look at Syaoran as he sits on the floor, leaning against the bed. If I move my feet slightly, I could touch his shoulder. I feel his warmth calling to my skin. I bite my lip, slowly moving my hands away from my face.

There’s suffocating silence.

Unable to bear it, I finally open my mouth. “Satiated now?” I keep my eyes closed, cursing myself for being so blunt.

Syaoran chuckles humorlessly. “Very,” he murmurs darkly.

My patience snaps, and I bolt upwards to glare down at him. “If Stella is able to satisfy you so much, why don’t you just go off with her? I’m sure she’ll be a better fuck than I’ll ever be-” I let out a strangled scream as Syaoran tackles me down to the bed, trapping my body beneath his.

“”A better fuck,” Sakura?” he hisses angrily, “Is that what I should be caring about? Do you honestly think that I’m such a fucked up bastard, to go off doing another girl right after I’ve slept with another?” His eyes are livid; I can’t do anything but keep watching them. His hold on me tightens considerably. “You’re such a kid. Can’t you stop to consider the reasons for my actions? Do you think I submitted to that vampire because I could help it? I couldn’t fucking help it, Sakura!”

I shudder as his yelling ends, bringing another moment of heavy silence. The weight of his words presses down against me, bringing attention to my wet eyes. I open my mouth then close it again. I can’t trust myself to speak anymore. Instead I just watch his flaming eyes, marveling and fearing the power in them.

“You say you love me?” he scoffs, adorning a wistful and bitter expression that breaks my heart, “You don’t love me, Sakura. You’re obsessed with me. Like a baby animal follows whatever it first lays its eyes upon as its parent, you’re clinging to me. You so-called love for me is nothing but an obsession!”

Syaoran’s voice pierces through my heart, taking my breath away. My lower lip trembles. I can’t speak, because I’m afraid of what might come out of my mouth. Obsession? It’s true that I’m obsessed with Syaoran… to the point of it being almost unhealthy. But…

“Isn’t it the same thing?” I finally choke out, and Syaoran looks at me incredulously. “Love is a form of obsession, and obsession is a form of love. Is it wrong to be both obsessed and in love?”

He stares at me as if I've just suggested the most ubsurd thing of all time.

“Do you love me, Syaoran?” my voice was a mere whisper now, “Do you love me at all?”

His eyes widen at my question. I hold my ground, clenching my fists in anticipation.

A dreadful silence, and he opens his mouth to speak… but no words escape, because a loud noise startles us both. Our eyes come to the source of the sound, and realize that the phone that Eriol and Tomoyo gave us is ringing. A few seconds later, and Syaoran whips the phone open and puts it on speakerphone mode. Saved by the bell. I smile bitterly to myself.

“Yeah?” he says hoarsely.

It’s Eriol. “Come back to San Francisco as soon as you can. We’ve got definite proof on the Barastelle’s schemes.”

Syaoran and I look at each other. “What kind of proof, Eriol?”

There’s a hesitant pause. “I shouldn’t really say anything over the phone. Once you get here, I’ll explain. But this is good stuff. Hurry your asses over here.”

It’s good news, for sure. But something is making me uneasy. “Where’s Tomoyo? Shouldn’t she be screaming with joy beside you or something?” I demand, half-joking and half-serious.

This time, there’s a notable pause. Syaoran frowns. “You bastard, did you already have your First Big Fight or something?”

“Shut your trap!” Eriol recovers, retorting back like his usual self, “We’ll meet you at Sakura’s house. No one checks there anymore.”

“Be sure to have made up with her by then,” Syaoran snickers, hanging up before Eriol can shout at him.

For the next moment, we both stare at the phone in disbelief. Is it finally ending?

Did Eriol and Tomoyo manage to find such a persuasive piece of evidence that they decided we should come right away? They trusted us and came to help us; it’s time to return the favour.

Syaoran speaks up. “Somehow, I’m getting a bad feeling about this,” he admitted, echoing my own thoughts, “But we can’t hide forever, I guess. Either we die trying now or die trying later.”

“Don’t try to change the subject,” I snapped, roughly pushing him down onto the bed, towering over him in anger, “Answer my question, Syaoran Li.” I realize we’re back into the same position as we were in moments ago.

He stares right back at me, his amber eyes devoid of any emotion. His hands suddenly pull my pants down, soon after capturing my face and bringing me dangerously close to him. “I’ve told you once that men are like wolves,” he breathes into my ear, a finger travelling up my back, “Do you think that I could have kept my hands off of you until you initiated things after that night if I didn’t care for you in the slightest?”

He’s avoiding the question. I can’t be satisfied with this kind of answer. I know that he cares for me, but does he love me the way I love him? I feel like I completely know Syaoran, yet sometimes I feel like he’s a total stranger. What is he thinking? What is he feeling? I want to know. I need to know.

An unexpected sound escapes my mouth as his finger moves within me. The next moment, I’ve surrendered to his lips and touches, unable to do anything else. There’s a more desperate edge to the way he moves against me, the way he covers my eyes as he pushes himself in. It’s as if he doesn’t want me to see him. He doesn’t want me to completely know him.

I ignore the jabbing pain in my heart. I ignore my imaginations of his lips whispering that he loves me into my ears, right this moment. I know that when we head out to San Francisco, we will either fail miserably or miraculously succeed. I don’t even know how we’re going to “succeed” in our situation, but how can I have hope if I believe that there’s only failure for us?

And so I let him take me for what may be the last time.

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Chapter 16 - Obsession – End –

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Author’s Note: I had to RUSH x1000 this chapter because school hit me before I realized… So it might be a little weird… but better than nothing XD (gets kicked away) It might be a little all over the place... (stops talking)

And… Oh dear. Is it just me or has this become really psychological? Sakura has developed into something I hadn’t really anticipated on – a psycho. YOU THINK I’M JOKING, I’M REALLY NOT! I guess it just came naturally, the whole mental imbalance thing. I mean, she WAS pretty unstable in the past. As I progressed, she became like this. And Syaoran became an asshole, at least in Sakura’s eyes. But it should be evident now that Syaoran’s just as insecure as Sakura is. He thinks that Sakura’s just OBSESSED with him, not in love with him. But little does he know that obsession is a form of love, and love is a form of obsession… (ok, enough with the riddles.)

Leonard isn’t that bad of a guy now, is he? My initial theme for this story was the whole “What’s good, what’s bad, who’s good, who’s evil” kind of thing. Hopefully the readers like Leonard more now, despite my horrible naming sense for his character. (Leonard and Stella are the only Italian sounding names I can think of) I like him more than Syaoran at the moment. It’s so easy making Syaoran a bastard XD

NOTE: I’ve been trying to think of a better way to end this story than the way I originally planned it to me, and I’m stuck… So if you want to help me, please PM or leave a review about how you think the story should end! That way I can gather info and try to put the pieces together.

Please drop me a review to keep me going!