Prompt: 019. and where I go, you'll be there with me, forever you'll be right here with me
Author's Notes: All Tolkien's characters. Lalaith was Túrin's sister, but died in a plague when she was three. Inspired by a note in Unfinished Tales about Túrin: 'Always he sought in all faces of women the face of Lalaith.'
'Then Lalaith will not come back?' said Túrin. 'Where has she gone?'
'She will not come back,' said Sador. 'But where she has gone no man knows; or I do not.'
– Unfinished Tales
From the day she was gone, I have been searching for Lalaith. It has stemmed, I think, from a young boy's inability to accept that his sister had truly gone forever. Some part of me believed that she had gone somewhere far away, and that I would eventually find her again. I was not aware at first that I was doing so, only that I wanted the joy that Lalaith had brought, but the women of my father's house were weighed down by care, and my mother was cold and remote. As I grew older and came to understand death better, I no longer searched for my sister, but I still found myself drawn to women who shared her spirit. I have found Lalaith in many women. Melian shares her deep joy of life, Nellas her love of nature, Finduilas her laughter and Níniel her vulnerability. If I could see my sister Nienor, perhaps I would find Lalaith in her too. Yes, she has gone, but I have found echoes of her throughout my life.