Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of the Dead Zone or SVU.

Summary: When the whole world turns against Johnny Smith he thinks there is nothing left for him, and then a detective from New York comes to town and they meet by chance. Neither of their lives will ever be the same.

A/N: I'm not sure when this one would be set to take place...I just came up with idea and began writing it.

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In the aftermath of the event Johnny would always remember it as the moment the changed his life. Most people would tell you that it was for the worst, and there was no going back at that moment—he was doomed to roam the earth unhappy for the rest of his days.

It was a cruel irony to have to deal with such an incident since he had survived more than his faire share of bad things. In those few moments time seemed to stand still as he watched the scene playing out in front of him. It wasn’t his fault. He hadn’t wanted any of it to happen. He had tried to stop it all from happening, but no one cared about that. All that they cared about was that he hadn’t stopped it from happening.

Johnny Smith tried to wish it all away every night before he closed his eyes. But when he opened them again in the morning a sick reminder drilled at his brain, reminding him of what he had done and that it was his entire fault. It wasn’t the end of the world but it sure as hell felt like it.

There were times when Johnny felt like the walls were caving in on him, trying to show him what it had been like, but it was no where near as bad as the actual event. Or so he believed. There was no knowing how bad it really had been, since he had walked away untouched. The sounds and smells of that night were engraved into his brain and he swore to himself he would never forget what he had done. For her, not for everyone else he had let down, just her. In the end she was all that had mattered. She was the only person that had always listened to him, even when the rest of the world thought he was a raving lunatic, she stayed. He could care less about everyone else if she was there for him. But she wasn’t. She had left too. It was so much to try and handle, it was driving him mad.

Her eyes were warm and friendly; her hands were soft and comforting. When she smiled he felt himself melting. And now…it was all over…he hated himself for what he had done. He had to do it. It was the only thing left to do. If they had listened they would understand that. Maybe she would understand his motives in time. He hoped that she would. He couldn’t live with himself knowing she hated him.

Johnny pulled into a parking stall near the front door and got out. He turned his Jeep off and then went into the store. He only wanted to take a few moments. Every time he went somewhere public he was pointed at, people yelled obscenities and glared at him. He wondered if this was what it was like in hell.

Johnny put his few items on the counter and looked at the man behind the counter. His face was hard and angry. He was not serving Johnny; Johnny sighed and rubbed at his throbbing temples.

“Will you just ring me up?” Johnny said. He was tired of it all. Bruce had said he would run to the grocery store for Johnny, but he wanted to do it himself. A woman behind him had stopped to watch. She wasn’t looking angrily at Johnny; she was instead looking puzzled at the scene playing out before her eyes.

“What seems to be the problem?” she asked. She walked over and put her hands on her hips, pushing her jacket out of the way to show her detective badge. The man behind the counter looked at her, and then at Johnny and grudgingly rung up the items. As Johnny was exiting the store he turned and looked at the woman who had helped him out. She smiled at him and then walked over to him. She was the most beautiful woman he had seen since…since Sarah.

Her eyes were brown and sad. Her long brown hair was tucked behind her ears and she was tall with long legs. She was a rare sort of beautiful—she knew it, but she didn’t care to exploit it. She knew that she had so much more to offer than just her looks. Though once she may have walked proudly the pride seemed to have worn down and she herself looked worn out. He wanted to look at her forever, but he couldn’t. She followed him out to his car.

“Thank you, for that,” Johnny said, nodding in the direction of the store. She shrugged and smiled again. Her smile was warm and welcoming, enough to pull the sun out from where it was hiding behind the clouds.

“You owe me now. I’m Olivia, Olivia Benson, by the way,” she said. He smiled and put his bag in the back seat.

“Johnny Smith. I’d take you to dinner but they wouldn’t serve me there, either,” he said. She frowned. She must be new there, if she didn’t know what he was talking about.

“How about you make me dinner and explain why that is,” Olivia offered. He grinned and laughed lightly. She was so sweet there was no way he could refuse. Even though he didn’t like talking about the incident, she had done him a favor, and she was still smiling.

“You’ve got yourself a deal.” Johnny let Olivia follow him home, and then said goodbye, promising to see her at seven that evening. She had a few more things she had to do before seven, so she left in a hurry smiling at him one last time. When he got inside Bruce was in his living room watching X-Files. One look at the goofy grin on Johnny’s face and Bruce knew something had happened.

“Who is she?” Bruce asked. He shut off the TV and walked over to Johnny. Bruce was Johnny’s best friend, and Johnny knew that without Bruce he would be lost. When the rest of the world had turned on him Bruce had been there. He was still there, even though things were getting harder and time seemed like it was running out. But for what, he didn’t know. It just felt like there was always something to be doing, and Johnny was spending most of his time indoors. Away from people, away from the sun.

“Olivia Benson, she’s a detective. I’ve never seen her around here before,” Johnny said. He went into the kitchen and put the few items he had purchased away and then sat down at the counter, staring aimlessly out the window.

“How’d you get in here? My million dollar security system is supposed to stop crazies like you from getting in.” Johnny grinned and looked at his friend, chuckling at the look on Bruce’s face.

“A magician never reveals his secret. Speaking of magic, I have to go. I got a hot date in an hour,” Bruce said. On his way out the door he patted Johnny’s shoulder then he was gone. The house was silent again. So quiet that it was unnerving. Johnny wanted Olivia to come over sooner. He hated being alone, he hated the silence, he hated the thoughts that entered his mind he was alone. But there was nothing he could do about it. So he went upstairs to shower. Hoping maybe the water would wash away all of his worries. Yeah right. That was like thinking he would soon wake up from this nightmare and it would all be over. All of it. The coma, the curse, the things he had seen. He wanted it to stop. He wanted to be normal. There was no chance that was happening.

XXXX

Little did Johnny Smith now that his date with Olivia Benson would change his life for the better. He had been unusually nervous the whole night as he prepared dinner and cleaned the house. He had gotten so used to Bruce being the only other person in the house that he had let the place go a bit, and it was almost frightening how messy it had gotten. As seven o’clock drew near he relaxed and opened a bottle of wine. He had dressed up slightly. He was wearing dark jeans and a button up blue shirt. It was a change from his usual more laid back attire but he liked it. There was something about dressing up that made him feel like he was doing something special.

The doorbell rang and he got up, taking his time to get to the door. Though he didn’t need his cane anymore his limp still came back at times, and he didn’t want to stress his leg more than he had to. He opened the door and smiled at Olivia. She looked…stunning.

She was wearing a little black dress that dipped down in the front enough to show some chest and fell just past her knees. Her hair was pulled back and she smiled at him then followed him inside, letting him take her coat from her. His fingers brushed against her smooth skin and he had his first vision of the night.

Olivia was sitting at a desk; a man occupied the desk across from her. She looked up at him and smiled when she realized he had been starring. The mans eyes were blue, and his smile was soft and warm.

“The faster you work the more you get done. Then the sooner we can go home, Elliot,” Olivia said. He grinned and went back to the paperwork that was scattered across both of their desks. The man called Elliot looked up at her again and then it was over.

“You okay? You looked a little lost,” Olivia said. He shrugged and then smiled at her.

“I made pasta, it should be done now, would you like some wine?” Johnny asked him. His words seemed to be bouncing all over the room and sentences were almost random. She laughed and then nodded. He liked her, she wasn’t too hard on him. Maybe this was something she had learned from Elliot.

He could barely think straight around her, she made him feel like a teenager again. His emotions were running on high and he wanted to touch her again. If only to feel the warmth of her skin on his fingers. He put his hand on the small of her back, thankful that he was not plagued by another vision. It seemed unfair to his dates that all he had to do was touch them to learn about them, they had to pry information out of him. It was harder than tearing a candy bar away from a diabetic eight-year old.

XXXX

Dinner went smoothly—they talked about little thing—learning little about each other. Johnny said very little about himself, while Olivia talked about things she liked. He learned she was from New York and had always loved the city. She had always wanted a cat but couldn’t have one in her apartment. She mentioned that she had worked Sex Crimes in Manhattan, and it had been her home for the last eight years. When she said this she fell silent as she thought about something. She turned her eyes to his and smiled, momentarily forgetting the pain of the past. During the entire meal she didn’t touch her wine, instead she drank water. Johnny didn’t find it odd at first. He thought maybe she was religious, but when he asked her she said she wasn’t.

“Why don’t you wait in the living room while I get dessert, and coffee,” Johnny said. He pointed her in the direction of the living room and then went back into the kitchen. She had so much to hide that it was almost frustrating. He didn’t want to pry into her past, but he was so curious. Was there a reason she had suddenly some to Maine? And why was it she never spoke of family or friends. Johnny shook away the thought and took out the chocolate mousse, then went out to the living room.

The question on his mind was, When should he tell her? He didn’t want to scare her away or make her think he was crazy, but he didn’t want to hide it from her. Maybe if they had another date, he could tell her when she opened up a little more.

“Mm, chocolate. You really know the way to a girls heart, don’t you?” Olivia teased. He laughed and sat down next to her.

“Back in the day I was quiet the ladies man,” Johnny said. She looked at him and laughed.

“You should get a cat. It would seem less empty with some life in here,” Olivia said. She put a spoonful of the mousse in her mouth and then looked at him.

“Yeah, I thought about it once, but I decided maybe later,” Johnny said. She laughed and bumped his knee with hers. He was no longer in his living room, he was in a small dark room away from Maine.

Light poured in through the cracks in the walls and cast eerie shadows on the small room. It smelled musty and the walls looked like they were barely staying up. Olivia was on the floor, lying next to her was Elliot.

Blood oozed from a cut on his forehead and his eyes were closed. Johnny heard what she was hearing, and her fear became his fear. Loud noises were echoing throughout the rest of the building, drawing closer to them. A woman shouted something that sound like “Munch!” Her shout was followed by a loud bang and she cried out in pain. Olivia gripped Elliot tightly and closed her eyes. Tears were falling down her cheeks and she wanted all of the pain to go away. There was more shouting and more noise. It was chaotic, and it seemed like her and Elliot had been forgotten in the small room. She knew that was a lie, but she kept telling herself the lie, finding some comfort in it.

The room began to fade and Johnny was back with Olivia. She had the same look on her face as before, when he had had his first vision.

“You sure you’re okay?” Olivia asked him. For a moment he considered lying and say he was, but he couldn’t. He wanted to tell her the truth. He wanted her to know all about him. He didn’t though—he didn’t want her to think he was crazy.

XXXX

Johnny walked Olivia to the door and stopped when he realized her car wasn’t outside. He looked at her for a moment then looked out the window again.

“I live a few houses down, so I walked,” Olivia explained. She seemed so relaxed, like she was always at ease. He grinned and then looked away from her for a moment.

“Well, then, I guess I’ll have to walk you home,” Johnny said. He put his hand on the small of her back and then guided her out the door. He noticed that she didn’t really like being pushed around, but for some reason she put up no fight against him. Johnny smiled inwardly and then let his hand fall back to his side.

It was a short walk to her home, just three doors down, and when they finally got to her porch Johnny didn’t know what to do. He wanted to kiss her, but he wasn’t sure if she would be okay with that. He didn’t want to just walk away and leave her hanging, but he didn’t want to scare her away. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Olivia leaned in and brushed her lips against his. Without hesitation Johnny leaned in and deepened the kiss. It seemed to last forever and pulled away only when he was sure he would pass out from lack of oxygen.

Olivia smiled at him and played with a button on his shirt. Her eyes lingered on his for a few moments before she stepped away from him and unlocked her door.

“I’ll see you later. Like, how about tomorrow?” Olivia suggested. A grin worked its way across his lips and settled there while he looked at her. He couldn’t stop it; he didn’t really want to.

“Yeah, how about I pick you up outside the Sheriffs office around noon,” Johnny said. She nodded and leaned in to kiss him again then went inside.

XXXX

Johnny’s dreams were plagued with flashes of the past, mainly from that one night. He didn’t know what his face had looked like but he imagined that it had been contorted with anger and frustration. His fists were clenched and he was looking at the few people standing in front of him, wishing they would just leave him alone. Up until that night he had always kept his temper in check, but something had pushed him over the edge. Was is what they were saying or was it the way they were looking at him.

Everyone expected something from Johnny, he couldn’t give it all to them. A part of him believed that if he continued to use his powers for the sake of others a part of his soul would slowly die off, this was not something he was meant to do. He was supposed to be a normal guy living a normal life with the woman he loved. But he couldn’t, and this annoyed him. It wouldn’t be as bad if they would just leave him alone.

Before Johnny woke up the last image that raced through his mind was Sarah. He wanted to reach out and touch her but she kept moving farther and farther away until she had retreated into the darkness.

Johnny sat upright in bed and blinked in the darkness. It was early in the morning, too early for him to get up. He laid back down and tried to fall asleep but it was useless. He stayed in bed and closed his eyes, trying to remember the last words he had ever spoken to Sarah. They were the words that tore him apart as he thought of them. Not just what he said to her but the response she shot back at him. He had never seen her so angry, and he never wanted to. Johnny often found himself wishing he could go back in time and take back what was said. He wanted to start over. He wanted to stop the accident from happening so he could spend the rest of his life with Sarah. Johnny’s phone rang and for a brief second he expected to hear Sarah’s voice, but why would she call him? She had made it clear that she hated him.

“Hello?” Johnny said. He didn’t sound even the least bit groggy. He was met with silence and then something that sent shivers down his spine.

“Some say that the hate began the night the truth got out, some say it started on the very first night. You know what I’m talking about? Of course you do. Don’t forget what you did, you ruined the lives of three innocent people, and you ruined your own life.” The person hung up and Johnny stared at it for a moment before setting it back down onto it’s cradle and looking at it. He had heard the voice before, but he had no idea where. It was a voice that he hated, or it belonged to a man that he hated. It was a chilling voice and he was frightened by the voice. Not just the voice, but the words that had been spoken. They were words that Johnny never wanted to hear; words he dare not speak; for fear of the guilt they may come with.

Guilt was something he had grown accustomed to living with, since it was a constant reminder of what he had done. It had been an accident, but there was no such thing as an accident. It could be traced back to human error, but not the error of any human, his error. He was not about to let himself forget about it, it wouldn’t be fair to the rest of the people involved.

Johnny laid back down and pulled the blankets up over his head. He wanted to disappear for awhile and come back when everyone had forgotten about him and what he had done. He was only human, there was only so much he could do. Why did everyone have to turn against him suddenly?

TBC...