I do not own Naruto! This story is a major OOC! Ya know why its ooc because if it wasn't there would never be any pairings in Naruto, because the guys are have to big of sticks shoved up there And the girls are to...blah! I do not mean any offence that is just my oppion and this is my FANFICTION! so this if you want the actual naruto go wach tv or read a manga! Alright now that my ranting is done i'm just gonna go...hehehehe...Enjoy and review please!

Chapter 1

“Come on in her butterfly I want to talk.” My mother says as she walks in to the living room and lays down on the plush burgundy coach. Talk. My stomach wrenches at the thought. There will be no talk. Only listing. And more listing.

When will it end. The same thing happens all over again. And again. Why must it be me that picks up the broken pieces?

I walk from the balcony that over looks the ocean front and down the baby blue hallway and into the living room where I see the women that I use to respect as a mother, a teacher, a confidant, laying on the coach with her arm draped over her face to keep the light from her eyes or maybe because she can’t stand too look at me anymore because of guilt I can’t be sure anymore. I sit in one of the many chairs in our living room; of course choosing the one farthest from my mother.

I hate to be around her anymore she is just a pathetic shell of what she use to be. And what she use to be was my mother. But now all she is, is a drunk she is no ones mother. No ones wife no ones daughter. She’s just a drunk. It’s all dads fault… my concise whispers to me, like I don’t already know that that my ‘Daddy dearest’ is the one that ruined my mother my, hero, and role model.

Most of the time my no good lousy father is working for his law firm, all because he has accomplished getting CEO. Being in that high of a position of power has it’s perks though. For instance, to be frank, we have a lot of money complete with a big house. The downside is that our ‘oh so loveable father’ is almost never home and when he is its for a short amount of time and he always has a blood/money/come sucking whore stuck to his fucking arm. But that suits him just fine. Because ever since mommy started in on the booze, daddy has become abusive when he doesn’t have a whore to relive him self with. He blames mother for the way him and her both are.

There is only one person in our dysfunction un-loving family that cares for me as much as I care for him and that is no other then my older bother Naruto. Naruto is just a year older then me at eighteen and a senior. He stands at 6’1 and has blonde spiky hair. Naruto inherited are fathers bronze colored skin where as I have mothers porcelain skin tone. Naruto has mothers blue eyes where as I have great grandmothers emerald color.

But this is not what makes my brother wonderful. What makes my brother wonderful is his personality. He is very hyper active and loves ramen, always has a smile on his face unless he is with his best friend Uchiha Sauske.

I blacked out as mother drowned on and on. I’d come back to reality long enough to say what I’m expected to say, and I do with out missing a beat. Hey if you go through this just about every other day you would to. It’s okay mama…Don’t cry mama…That’s in the past mama. Mother finally fell in to a deep sleep or passed out I’m not sure which and I couldn’t be more glad or depressed, about it.

I get up and pull the purple and pink wool blanket me and mother made when I was ten off the back of the coach and cover her up. I know she will be cold and nobody else is here to do it. I walk to the stairs leading to my room and stop to take one last glance at what is left of my mother. then head up the stairs and to the very last door on the right, and enter my room silently.

My room consist of light purples and pinks from when I was about ten. My brother keeps getting on me about changing it to fit my age and stuff, but I always manage to forget. Oh well it not that terrible. Okay maybe it is. It was terrible when I was ten it’s terrible now. Maybe I’ll paint it a royal purple and red with some gold here and there? My bed is off to the left of my room by my window with a beautiful view of the ocean. To the right of my room there is my desk, and dresser which holds my stereo and giant collection of cd’s. I could never live with out my music. That’s one thing that has never change since I was younger and never will as I get older.

I close my door and after making sure it’s locked I walk strait over to my dresser and pull out a shinny little razor blade that would be the look of perfection if it wasn’t for the little dried blood that stains the silver tool. I roll up my sleeve to reveal only scars. I had been forced to quit a few months ago after Naruto found out and went postal on my ass. But that’s okay, it just shows that my big brother cares for me more than anyone else. He swore not to tell or ‘get me help’ if you quit. So I did. But I can’t anymore its just to hard.

I just sat there and watched as the blood dripped from my wrist on to the black towel under my arm. I’m not so stupid as to use something white someone could find easier. I watched the black towel suck up my blood like a black hole and I silently wished it would swallow me up also. It would be easier. I take the razor across my arm one more time. I just sit there and stare and my bleeding wrist. But I don’t see the damage done or my blood flowing freely on to my dark and growing darker cloth. All I can see is the one question that go repeatily through my mind. I wonder if death would be better?

I bandage my arm and crawl in to my large blue bed pulling the covers to my chin and nuzzling into sleep feeling better that I have in the last few months. I almost forgot how good I feel after I spill my own blood.