Moksi idly watched Yoruri writing on his scroll from the other side of the inn room. The accommodations at Crescent Lake were wonderful now that they didn’t have to worry about money. The white mage was stabbing at the paper as if it had committed some dreadful sin, but Yoruri had seemed a little out of touch all day.

The creaking of the door pulled his attention for a moment. Becca appeared and wandered into the room.

“There you are!” Moksi said cheerfully. “We should go and talk to the Sages tomorrow if you can spare the time.” He grinned at her.

Becca nodded. “Not like the world can wait.” She added something else that Moksi didn’t think he wanted translated. Becca had a rather low opinion of the Sages in general. Becca had a generally low opinion of most things until she got to know them.

“We’ll just have to pull Kyo out of his scroll.” Moksi pondered aloud.

“You cover me and I’ll get a bucket of cold water.” Becca laughed. Moksi laughed too, but Kyo ignored them both. The only one to look up was Yoruri and as soon as their eyes met he turned his eyes back to his scroll and stabbed at it all the more fiercely.

“I don’t know, Kyo is behaving normally at least, Yoruri’s been a little off.” Moksi said. “He doesn’t normally look that pale.”

Becca looked over and snorted. “That’s because he’s practically in love with you.”

Moksi looked a bit surprised. “Love? Really? That bad?”

Becca glared at him. “You know?”

Moksi looked a bit affronted. “I guessed a while ago, but didn’t think it was love.”

Becca mumbled again in her native language before she spoke again in the Common. “It’s something at any rate and if its not love then I’m a turtle.”

“The Warrior Lord appeared to him and the Lady of White Magic appeared to me…” He began deciding not to make a comment on the turtle.

“Oh!” Becca said with a drawl. “Fated lovers! How romantic!” She made an impressive pair of star struck eyes at Moksi before she reverted to her normal self. “You should do something before he bores a hole in the table. If he’s whacked out over you we’ll all get fried.” She glared at him. “I didn’t come this far to get fried.”

“What do you want me to do?” Moksi asked throwing his hands in the air in surrender.

“Tell him you love him, tell him you hate him, screw him until he can’t walk, I don’t care. Pick one.” She shrugged.

Moksi blinked at her. “That’s a bit tactless, don’t you think?”

“Nope.” She said looking him over once. “Hey! Yoruri!” She bellowed across the room.

Yoruri started and his quill flew from his hands. He looked back over his shoulder. “Yes, Becca?” His voice was shaking.

“Get over here! Moksi has something he wants to tell you. You two are going for a nice walk!” She glared down at Moksi. “Keep that kid in one emotional piece or so help me, by the Tiger, I’ll pound you so far into the ground you’ll meet the Devil.” She said through her teeth and then looked up and smiled at Yoruri as he approached. “You two go walk. I’ll see if I can separate Kyo from his scrolls by tomorrow.” She pushed Yoruri into Moksi’s arms and hustled them both out the door and slammed it behind them.

Moksi chuckled. “That’s Becca.” He muttered. Tactful as always, he thought, leading a confused looking Yoruri downstairs and out into the sunset.

Yoruri stared at Moksi’s back as they made their way out into the field. Something to tell me? He thought, his mind still awhirl within itself. Moksi had been talking to Becca… had he been voted out of the group? His thoughts spiraled downwards from there. When Moksi finally stopped walking Yoruri was so far into his thoughts that he slammed into Moksi’s back and tumbled to the ground but he’d no sooner hit it than he started babbling.

Yoruri’s words came in a steady, fast, and incomprehensible stream. Moksi, who had turned to assist him to his feet, found himself confronted with his fellow warrior near tears and making no sense. Moksi felt a twang for him. He could remember his own mind on that night in the desert. He didn’t know what he could do to calm Yoruri’s mind, he’d always been a rational and methodical person and his sense of reason told him that he should get to know Yoruri’s and his own ideas of love before he went headlong into a relationship, especially one that affect their lives or untimely deaths. Becca had managed to abort that attempt in her own special way. Becca had also threatened him and he knew that she was one to follow through on her threats.

He sighed and yanked Yoruri abruptly to him effectively silencing his incoherent babbling. “Becca told me to do or say one of three things.” He began with a sigh. Yoruri broke off into another spat of incoherent babbling and Moksi had to suppress the urge to kiss him just to make him stop. “Yoruri, do you really love me?” The man in his arms froze. He looked down and the Mage’s face was paler than his robes.

Yoruri suddenly felt cold. Had the Gods told him? Had he known all along? Yoruri felt like he was a young boy all over again. He felt himself blushing and he lowered his eyes. “Yes. I really love you.” He almost whispered. He closed his eyes hard to hold back tears. He wasn’t a young boy and he wasn’t going to start crying. He made a prayer to the Light Lady and took a deep breath.

“How long?” He heard Moksi’s voice from above him. His head tried to sink lower. “Sometime after we met. I wasn’t planning on telling you until after this whole thing was over…”

“Becca knew.” Moksi interrupted.

Yoruri gave a sick little laugh. “Somehow that doesn’t surprise me. Becca knows everything.”

“Why didn’t you want to tell me?” Moksi’s voice sounded tender, but Yoruri still didn’t look up.

“I didn’t want either of us to be distracted but I guess I gave myself away this afternoon.” He said grimly staring at the tops of his scuffed and travel worn boots. “The Warrior Lord told me to help you…”

Moksi suddenly forgot why they had come out into the field. He gripped Yoruri’s shoulders and pushed him back so that he could look him in the eyes. “The Warrior Lord commanded you to help me?” His voice made Yoruri wince and he tried to soften his tone. “You wouldn’t have otherwise?”

“No!” Yoruri almost shouted his eyes coming dangerously close to tears once again. “I would have helped you no matter what the Gods had said. Damnit! I’m in love with you!” He pulled out of Moksi’s grip and turned to face to night. “I don’t think I could leave your side if the Lady of Light threatened to damn me if I didn’t!”

Moksi could hear tears in Yoruri’s voice and now found himself at a bit of a loss. He hadn’t expected that adamant of a vow but he knew that he simply couldn’t stand and say nothing. “Ah…well…that night…in the desert. That night when you helped me talk to the Light Lady. The Warrior Lord finally spoke with me again…thank you…” his words seemed to shatter on the silent of the night.

“You’re welcome.” Yoruri said with a small smile. “It was the first time that the Warrior Lord ever appeared to me. I have to follow his command.” He now dared to look up at Moksi and managed another tiny smile. “Although, I cannot press my presence on you. Please let me assist you in your magic and perhaps help you find a new focus with your sword skills.” He bowed once. “I can ask you nothing else.” He turned and began to walk back towards the inn.

Moksi struggled for words but found none. Even though the posture of Yoruri’s walk hadn’t changed it looked defeated.

Yoruri walked back into the inn and was met by Becca who gave him a suspicious stare.

“Why the face?” She demanded. “What did Moksi tell you?”

Yoruri managed to regain most of his composure. “He didn’t tell me anything, he just asked me if I love him.”

Becca nodded slowly. “And you said…?”

“I said yes. I love him.” Yoruri declared.

“And he didn’t say anything after that?” She crossed her arms over her chest.

Yoruri shook his head sadly. “No, he didn’t.”

“Go to bed.” Becca ordered. “We’ll be seeing the Sages tomorrow.” She mumbled something else as she passed by Yoruri and headed down the stairs.

“Where are you going? Not to kill the Sages I hope.” Yoruri’s chuckle sounded a little to forlorn and the attempt at humor fell flat.

“No. Go to bed, Yoruri.” Becca stalked down the stairs and Yoruri didn’t dare to go after her. He turned and entered their room to go to bed, as she had been ordered. It seemed clear that Moksi didn’t love him, but he wasn’t forced out of the party. Yoruri smiled grimly at the bed sheets as he readied himself. At least it hadn’t been painful, he reflected, it could have been much worse.

Becca stormed out of the Inn and met Moksi at the door. She pushed him backwards out into the night.

“Becca? What?” Moksi found himself shoved hard but he managed to keep his feet.

“Do you love Yoruri?” She demanded her visible anger lending itself to her accent, which became unusually thick.

“What? I…” Moksi stammered unprepared as always for Becca’s ability to get directly to the point of a conversation without any introduction.

Becca gripped the front of Moksi’s shirt and almost hauled him off of his feet. “I told you to keep that boy in once piece and so help me I will send you to meet to Devil Beast!”

“Becca!” Moksi tried to remove her hand in order to get some air into his lungs. “I swear I…”

“I don’t want your oaths, warrior!” She spat. “Do you love him or not?” Her grip almost cut off the rest of his air.

Moksi stared down at her. “I…I don’t know!” He gasped, kicking his legs a little hoping that she would get the hint.

Becca’s grip tightened. “You don’t know? You’d better decide very quickly, warrior!” She made the word sound like a curse. “Yoruri has saved our lives! You owe him at least the dignity of a straight refusal!”

Moksi coughed and debated kicking her to allow him some more air. “I never refused him…I…”

“I’ll leave you some time to talk with your Gods, warrior!” She threw him onto the ground and Moksi gasped gratefully. “You’d best decide which way you’re going to talk!” She turned. “I’ll be waiting for you behind the door.” Becca stormed back into the Inn and Moksi sat stunned where he had landed and tried to catch his breath.

Becca was always straightforward about things but he’d never been hauled off his feet and threatened in the same day. He sighed and stared at the closed door of the Inn. He knew that Becca wouldn’t let him back into their room unless he had an answer either way. He sighed and walked back towards the spot where he and Yoruri had spent the afternoon. He sat down heavily on the grass and stared up at the stars as they began to flood the sky. He took several deep breaths and decided that Becca’s “suggestion” that he talk to his God seemed like the best idea. He closed his eyes and opened his mind.

It was hard to keep his mind on the meditative track, but eventually his body felt disconnected and heavy and he seemed to float upwards. He was met by a Red Light and a figure that stood in full armor.

The voice rumbled his very soul. “You have come to me again, my Sword Bearer.” The statement was amused. “What trouble makes you return?”

Moksi carefully told his story, even Becca’s threats. The words poured across his mind and almost sent him into new turmoil.

The Warrior Lord was soon all around him. “Look within yourself and fin the answer, Sword Bearer.”

Moksi wanted to scream and yell, but he only clung to the deity that hovered around him. He never thought about love. He’d only thought about weapons, armor, and the best strategies for fighting. He’d devoted his time and life to battle. He’d never given much thought to deeper feelings. He had never needed to, this was unfamiliar territory and he had no way of knowing how to fight this battle.

“Look.” The stern command turned his eyes into himself and soon he seemed to be floating in his own mind.

When he returned to himself he found that instead of sitting he was lying flat on his back. He opened his eyes into the sea of stars blocked by the black colored leaves of the trees. He rose shakily to his feet, his mind and body felt spent, as if he had been out in the desert doing hard labor all day. He staggered back to the inn. Becca said nothing as she opened the door and ignored him when he flopped into his bed.

Morning dawned and Becca shook Moksi awake.

“Wake up, warrior!” She stared at him and Moksi attempted to make her come into focus. “You and Yoruri are going for another walk.” It was a statement, not an option. Moksi seriously wondered of her native language even had question marks.

Moksi tried to sit up. The room slowly swam into focus and he noticed that Kyo was already bent over his scroll. Yoruri was slipping his robe over his head. “The Sages…” He mumbled drowsily.

“Can wait another day.” Becca growled and stared at him, as if daring him to defy her. “Now get up and take the Wizard downstairs for breakfast before I send you to stay with your God permanently.”

Moksi snapped awake at the threat and tried to clean himself up and straighten and smooth his clothes.

“Oh, Yoruri!” Becca’s voice was cheerful now. “Moksi is going to take you to breakfast and then you two are going for another walk.” She slapped the Wizard on the back, almost sending him sprawling to the floor.

Moksi looked over at Yoruri. The Wizard looked as if he wanted to sink into the floor and Moksi really couldn’t blame him.

Yoruri stared over at Moksi. His clothes were rumpled as if he had slept in them and he found himself staring at his feet once again in an effort to control a blush. What did Moksi want from him now? Did Moksi want to tell him that he should leave? He slowly walked towards the door of the room. Moksi fell into step behind him and Yoruri had to force himself not to run. He wanted to run out of the inn and throw himself to the mercy of the wilds. Something held him back and he whispered a prayer to the Light Lady.

Moksi watched Yoruri’s back. His pace was nervous and stiff. Moksi sighed inwardly and wished that Becca would learn to be more tactful. He thought he caught Yoruri whisper a prayer to his god and Moksi smiled sadly and he wanted to reassure him, but for some reason he couldn’t open his mouth until they were out in the clearing near the Sages.

“Yoruri, I’m sorry for my reaction yesterday.” Moksi decided that this would be the best way to start, but before he could continue, Yoruri’s sad voice interrupted him.

“I should have waited, despite Becca, I should’ve waited.” He was staring hard at his boots and the grass, but his words were fast. “I’m sorry for putting you in that position and considering that you mustn’t really love me…”

“Stop!” Moksi said a little more forcefully than he intended and Yoruri jumped backwards. He softened his voice for his next words. “I never said that. I never said anything, I just demanded answers and I jumped to conclusions.”

Yoruri had looked up briefly but had quickly returned to his intent observation of the grass. “You don’t have to make excuses, Moksi.” He chuckled, but it was a low sad strained as if in the verge of another wave of tears. “I can handle rejection like an adult. You can come out and say it, I wouldn’t be offended.”

Moksi felt the urge to throttle the White Wizard but he took a deep breath. “Yoruri, I never said anything either way and if you want the truth it’s because I’ve never given a though to love or anything else.” He paused to gather his words, unused to this situation. “I’m a warrior…” he fell off as he realized the argument was a poor one. “I’m not rejecting you…”

Yoruri looked up cautiously. “What are you doing then?” The Wizard’s voice was calmer, now with less of an edge of sadness and more an edge of confusion. The sounds of the town getting ready for the day could now be heard in the distance and the sun climbed a little higher.

“I’m saying that I don’t know what to do.” Moksi admitted with sagging shoulders. He opened his mouth to say more wishing there were a way to convey what he had discovered about himself without words. Words didn’t seem to do it justice. He ended up just staring helplessly at Yoruri.

Yoruri stared back. “You don’t know what to do?” The wizard tilted his head to one side and seemed to want to say something else, but thought better of it and simply shook his head. “You always know what to do.”

Moksi gritted his teeth in frustration. “That’s exactly the problem!” He felt like pacing, something he never did. He took a deep breath instead. “Look. I need to know what you’d expect out of a relationship before I declare undying vows of affection.”

Yoruri’s look grew more quizzical. “You need time…” his voice fell off in confusion and he blinked several times before continuing. “Ok, you need to know, but I need to know. What am I to you?”

There it was the question that Moksi had run through his head in a hundred different forms, but at least wasn’t: “Do you love me?” He felt as though he were on firmer ground now. He knew that he couldn’t pause to long, but it was hard to know where to begin.

“You are special to me. I know you are special to my Lord and your Lady favors you. I know that my Lord led me to you but I don’t know why.” He paused to see how Yoruri was taking this. The White Wizard didn’t seem upset so he continued. “I would be willing to try and see if we could work things out. You are of the same mind as me, you don’t want to put the others in danger, but I know that you must be something special since you lead my back to my Lord.” His eyes looked past Yoruri, actually dreading looking at the Wizard, he studied the trees beyond where he could see the red robes of the Sages.

Yoruri’s face softened into a smile. “The Lady always has something in mind when she brings people together.” He dared to reach up and touch Moksi’s shoulder. “I am willing to try, although it’s rather unfair since I will hardly have to try.”

Moksi managed to bring his eyes back to Yoruri’s face. It was a beautiful young face, although it bore the traces of their long journey. It was a face that had seen battle, those battles were in his eyes and their trials told in every part of his body. The lines of worry and battle scares seemed to make him all the more endearing. Moksi smiled.

“Good. I’m glad. Now let’s see about breakfast. Becca is sure to let us in now.”

We haven’t left the town yet, but we are actually going to see the Sages tomorrow. Kyo finally took a break from those scrolls, although I suspect Becca had something to do with it because Kyo is pouting.

I feel better now. Everything is settled with Moksi and somehow even though he didn’t give me a declaration of undying love my heart is light. I think that even if we do die in a battle ahead I can die happily and go to my Lady free of doubt. It’s odd to feel so peaceful outside of meditation.

Moksi told me I was special to him. That’s what’s making my heart so light. The idea that I could be special to him… I’m sounding like a girl on her first love. The Lady knows that this isn’t my first. I love Moksi... I know that now. I’m not in love with him, I truly love him, and his Lord showed me that. I will keep them all safe. Then, perhaps when this is all over we can rest and maybe by that time Moksi will be sure of himself. I can wait until then.

End