Here’s an extra long chapter to celebrate!

What are we celebrating, you ask? This is the first anniversary of the day I began writing (give or take a few days).

Reviews count as presents! Sing a merry tune and read this funny chap!

Happy Halloween to all those humans/xenomorphs/cyborgs/pirates out there. At the end of this chapter is a special author’s note…from a character? Who will it be? You’ll see…

Chapter 14

Giving Thanks

Frizak coughed, noticing the blood he choked up. He was bleeding in the gums, from what felt like a punch. He was secured to something…a pole, the room around him cold and dark, and he was unable to make anything out but the warmth of the blood that dripped from his mouth to the floor. He spat out more, realizing he was tied to a pole and hanging face-downwards, as if he was being roasted over a fire, but there fire was missing.

It the place where the fire would be…was an egg.

Frizak blinked…no, it wasn’t an egg, it was a rock. His head hurt, he was hallucinating, and he felt his legs were a little numb. Frizak extended his wrist blades, cutting both arms loose to hang upside-down, ten feet from the floor. The post was made entirely of resin, and so were his bonds, but his blades were enough to get him out. He didn’t cut the resin holding his feet, however…he was too high up.

“They got you too, huh?” A voice said, and Frizak looked up…down….to see a human child sitting in a corner. “I didn’t see them bring you in…what are you in for? Living? Being in the wrong place at the wrong time?” Frizak swung his wrist blades at the human, growling, but he shoved his rage away to focus on where he was.

“Cr-k-k-k-k-k-k…”

“What the hell?”

Frizak looked for something to grab onto while he cut himself down, but then decided that he would jump down anyways, no matter what he landed on. He reached up to cut himself down, his wrist blades slicing into the resin as if it was butter, the stuff cracking and turning to dust. He fell…then jerked, hung by something, and looking down at his feet he saw that he was also bound to the ceiling by length of steel cable. The Xenomorphs had gotten smarter, and more cautious, but they had forgotten about his wrist blades.

The cable was blackened by resin, and it was secured to his feet with a rubber sheath around it to keep it from cutting into his skin. The Xenomorphs were getting a little soft as well. Frizak reached up to slice the cables, but as soon as the metal blades touched the steel he went rigid, electricity coursing though his body like fire in his veins, and then he went limp, hanging down with arms extending below him.

Smart little bastards… He thought, blacking out.

Roswell Outskirts

“OW! Goddamnit!” Sara’s father yelled, jerking his thumb away from the engine of his car and jumping back, hitting his head on the open hood in the process. “OW! DAMNIT!”

Are you trying to poison the air or yourself? I could help with the last one, you know. Carl turned around but nothing was there, and when he turned back he saw the alien sitting on top of the engine block. You aren’t a very good mechanic, either.

“And you think you can do any better?” He snapped, gritting his teeth.

I’m an alien and even I know what’s wrong with this vehicle by just looking at it. Of course, I can see through metal but that isn’t the point. A family of rats made a nest inside the engine and has been squashed by the pistons. The goop left behind festered for a month without the car being used and has become a colony of super-bacteria. They are slowly eating their way out and when they escape they will kill of the human race as a mega-flu.

Carl was silent for a moment. “Really?”

I can smell it from inside the house, in the attic, surrounded by the walls of my shelter. I am very sure. The alien tapped the side of the engine block. I can kill it all if you wish…you know, save the human race.

“Well then do it!”

...say please.

“You’re an alien! Aliens don’t need for people to say please.”

Point…Spine cracked his knuckles and placed them on the sides of the engine, rearing back his head and opening his mouth.

“Wait, are you going to spray acid on it?!”

…you don’t want me to?

“No!”

…fine. Spine sighed, instead placing the end of his tail in the air-intake, the spines on the end spreading out and a thin green liquid squirting out. There, that venom will spread and kill everything in there. It should work properly once the bacteria are gone, as they have been corroding the metal. The venom will repair it well enough for it to function.

“You need to find a job for this, alien.”

My name is Spine, but I see why you say that. Spine said, tapping the end of his tail on the bottom of the hood. I’m still an alien…human cities and I do not mix well without a healthy dose of blood, screaming, and the odd impregnation. If those aren’t added then it tastes funny.

“Funny…you’re a comedian and a serial killer.” Carl shook his head. “How long until that stuff is done working?”

Ten minutes.

“Enough time for me to take a nap.”

Is ten minutes enough for that?

“No, but four hours is.”

How is that the same as ten minutes? Oh…I get it. Fine, human, go sleep. I’ll just go play in traffic…maybe kill a few children.

“Spine!” The alien looked up as Sara yelled out the door. “Get in here; you have some explaining to do!”

Uh oh…

Sara Jefferson

“Spine…” Sara struggled not to scream. “What…the fuck…is that?!”

The three humans and the one Xenomorph stared at a throbbing blob of black goop in the shower, about the size of a large cat. In fact, exactly the size of a large cat.

Well…there’s an interesting story that goes along with that, you see…

“Tell me what the fuck is growing in my shower, you alien bastard!”Sara screamed.

“Sara!” Linda cried, horror on her face.

“Are you seeing this?! There’s an alien thing growing in my shower, mom!”

“It’s nothing to get upset about!”

“IT HAS A HEARTBEAT!”

Calm down! Spine yelled. Sara took a deep breath. Now…that is what remains of the neighbor’s cat, I had to store the bones somewhere where the cystic acid would break them down to eat later.

Sara fumed…and so did the blob, literally. “Get it out of here and put it in the trash.”

But-

“NOW!”

Spine looked from each of them to the blob and back to each of them, then sighed and nodded. Alright, alright, I hear you. I’ll get it out. Spine used his tail to cut the thing from the floor of the shower, picking it up and carrying it from the room. Such a waste of good food…

Everyone was silent for several moments.

“Who’s up for some food?” Linda said, smiling.

“I’m out.” Carl left, shaking his head.

“If you don’t mind, I’ll be disinfecting my shower before using it.” Sara said, nodding her head. “Tell Spine that next time he does this I’ll kill him, alien or not.”

I heard you, Sara, I’m not deaf. Spine said from nowhere in particular.

“Good…don’t forget it.”

Spine

Thanksgiving Day

Spine looked around the table at the various foods he had never seen before, all piled about in a disorganized fashion. The spot where he had carved his little triangle was clear, but ever square inch of the rest was covered by…whatever it was. In the center of it all was the seared, steaming remains of some very large bird, which smelled horrible. How humans could look at it all and not either die of nausea, he had no idea. The only thing that looked remotely good wasn’t even the food, but Sara, who was sitting across from him. Spine had to sit crouched in the chair with his legs to his chest.

“Well…long hours of work have really paid off.” Linda said, looking over the landscape of foodstuffs. “Any questions or comments?”

What is this for?

“Pardon?”

Why are we giving thanks again? Spine asked, mentally raising an eyebrow.

“Well, when the Pilgrims first came to-“ Carl started, but Sara held up her hand to stop him.

“I think I can explain.” She said. “At some point in time, a few humans decided they didn’t like where they lived, so they sailed across an ocean of incredible size to get to a land that had nothing on it. When they got here half of them hadn’t survived the voyage and the ones that did had no idea how to survive. There happened to be a few Native Americans there that pitied the starving pilgrims and decided to give them food and teach them to plan crops. So, in honor of that act of generosity we give thanks every year.”

Everyone was silent for a moment while Spine processed this.

This seems like a waste of time and effort to me.

“Spine, you think anything that doesn’t involve blood is a waste.”

Not true! He paused. Alright, maybe a little true.

“You remind me of the roommate I had in college.” Carl muttered, prodding the large bird in the center of the table.

“Did your roommate travel through time?” Sara asked.

“Actually, yes…though he used a hell of a lot of weed to do it. I swear, that kid lived inside of his own personal lava lamp…”

---------------

Well, I don’t know how to do this, but I suppose I can try. Hello, humans, I am your lord and master, Spine. Fear me. Well, that’s not why I’m here; I’m here because Ty wants me to be. Are all you nasty little fleshbags having a nice, freaky Halloween? Good…don’t forget to send me candy. It’s bad enough having to put up with all you fools without having anything sugary to eat while doing so.

Well, it’s time to say happy birthday to Tyrammafar. The author wasn’t born around now, but the Worldmaker was, and so we all have to give a round of applause. I would, if it wasn’t so dangerous, but I do get to uncork the champagne bottle with my tail, and that’s always fun. Nice to get out of that Roswell heat for a bit…blazing hot there, even in November!

So, I guess this is it, morsels, sorry that I cannot ‘hang’ for a while longer, but duty calls as they say.

One final announcement. I think Ty was planning on keeping this a secret for longer, but I just have to tell someone…this story will have an off-shoot! Heh heh, Ty is writing up the first chapter now. Basically, it’s going to be a TV series sort of like one of those good shows that got cancelled due to the Japs taking over the TV show industry. You see, being confined to Roswell is not something Sara or I want, and so we end up getting a Winnebago and hitting the road…

Yeah, it’s a comedy.

See you people on the other side…don’t let the facehuggers bite…that would be a shame.

( (inner jaws emote)

-Spine Cyrosyl