I truthfully cannot believe I'm doing this. Writing a Tales of Symphonia fic, when I have a Kingdom Hearts and a Final Fantasy VIII waiting on my doorstep. But no, this idea just won't go away ever since I started playing again. I've just rescued Lloyd from the Triet Base, so I'll try to get to there before playing again… this is gonna be so hard… and my school work…

-shuts tape with mouth- I shall stop whining now to myself, and introduce the story. This, ladies and gentlemen, is my newest one: Catastrophic Carousel. Fancy title, hm? Hah; random things are the best. Buuut, it does fit.

This is a fall-into-game story, maybe a little different, maybe not. I won't discard it as cliché for now, maybe or maybe not later when I see how it progresses. It's a little slow in the beginning, but it'll have much more character interaction later on. Until then, read on and don't forget to send in your reviews, suggestions, and helpful critique!

Disclaimer: Tales of Symphonia and its characters belong to Namco. Ellone belongs to me.

Chapter One :

Shining Angel, Empty Skies

All dreams start out the same for most people – with inky black darkness. You see it when you close your eyes, falling into deep unconsciousness, and it is soon replaced by bright colors of the world that is set deep in your mind. Or maybe it stays in the dark, straying away from the light that you yearn to see, and you never manage to obtain a glimpse of your dreams throughout the whole night.

I wonder, is this all a dream too?

I am still a fifteen-year-old child; I am still me. My name hasn’t changed – Ellone, Ellone, the voices chanted at me when I opened my eyes. I don't think I've changed much either, because I still have my dirty-blond hair in a ponytail and my grey eyes staring fearfully up ahead of me. But I don't think there's anything there – not anymore, at least.

Where had she gone? The little shining sphere that lead me all the way here; where is it? Am I all alone?

…Where the hell is it?

I cursed as the cold wind snapped at my face and uncovered ears, pulling my striped white-and-brown-and-blue sweater closer to my body – cursing again the bare shoulders it left me with and the thin spaghetti-strapped black top underneath – and hoping I was finally catching up with the whatever-it-was that started this chase in the first place.

It was a good thing I just came from my late-evening volleyball game – I could feel the left-over adrenaline pumping through my veins, enhancing my running speed. My bag with our team's uniform thumped against my legs as I clutched it tighter in my hand, rushing around a corner of the dark city the tournament was held at. I can hear my booted feet echoing eerily in the empty alley I just turned into, and the few lights behind me cast my shadow on the high walls.

Scrunching up my short black skirt with my other hand, I attempted peering closer into the darkness. And there; the little flash of light! I walked slowly, cautiously, towards it, a thousand and one thoughts jumbling themselves up in my head.

…Why was I following a glowing, floating little light anyways? It was strange, I know, and turning into an alley of an unknown city in the dark by yourself was even more dangerous. But I blame my curiosity, as I always do – what would you do if a shining light the size of your fist popped up right before your eyes?

I knew I should have just turned right back around and hurried to the hotel our volleyball team was staying at before my coach caused herself an ulcer, or worse, a heart attack like she tended to do when she was extremely nervous. But no; the tiny light was intriguing, fascinating me into following it on a mad cat-and-mouse chase.

I finally took the last few steps needed to clearly see the object I was focused so hard on, wondering why it stopped here of all places. Just a few more seconds, and there – I was finally able to examine it closely.

It mewed at me.

I groaned after staring at the small cat for a moment, damning the what-ever-it-was with every word I knew in my head. Where the hell did the orb go!? I saw it flashing dimly just a few seconds ago!

"How troublesome," I muttered to myself, staring at the cat once more as it cocked its head cutely and examined me with large green eyes. It was abnormally small, all black with a white spot on its forehead and around its neck as if in a small shawl. We continued watching each other curiously – in my case, of not a bit angrily – for what seemed like eternity before I decided to break the silence.

"So," I started casually, feeling slightly foolish for talking with a stray cat. "Seen a glowing little thing floating around here?"

It cocked its head again, this time to the other side and mewed, still observing me. I sighed; oh well. With the possibility of me getting a rather long lecture once I returned back to our hotel on the line, I wasn't willing to risk it any longer. I bid the kitty a silent good-bye and turned on my heel to leave.

"Meow."

It wasn't a mournful cry for me not to leave it alone by itself; it was more of a 'where-are-you-going?' kind of mew. How I knew this, you ask? I really have no idea.

The cat mewed again, this one more quietly and I glanced over my shoulder back at it, locking my own grey eyes with its startling green ones. We watched each other once more, both unmoving and silent, before the cat's mouth seemed to curl upwards at the corners.

Mieu.

The word wasn't said out loud, more like it was bouncing off the walls of my mind. Mieu, Mieu, Mieu, it seemed to call. It was frightening, but at the same time chanting for me to accept it.

And I did.

The very moment I said that name, "Mieu," the cat's eyes seemed to light up and its animalistic grin widened, showing off its white fangs, before it glowed before my eyes and disappeared.

I was gone with it. Just like that.

The voices that sang my name – Ellone, Ellone, Ellone – weren't frightening, just a bit startling, when I awoke to the black abyss. I couldn't tell whether I was alone or not; the darkness was creeping up everywhere, and the strange soft glow my body was giving off did not stretch out as far as I would have liked.

I twitched my body, starting with my fingers, glad to find that I wasn't hurt. Instead, I felt strangely light – as if I was in outer space, with no gravity pulling me towards the ground. The voices were still whispering and singing my name, soothingly and peacefully.

But where was I?

I might have been dreaming – though I don't understand how I could have just collapsed like that in an alleyway – except that I could feel every part of my body perfectly, and even the pinch I gave myself on my bare shoulder pained my skin for a moment. I did not feel tired either, or nervous, or even frightened. Instead – it was strange. I felt as if I belonged here; as if I spent so much time here before, wrapped in safety and soothing words.

Finally…

The voices, the many many voices quieted and one voice – a woman's voice, mature and beautiful, emerged from the rest, with so much relief I could have staggered back from the surprising amount of it.

And then it was replaced by another voice. The voice from before.

Finally…

It was repeated again and again and again, playful and bouncy and airy in the darkness that I felt it was the only light to cling onto here. Then the voices rose abruptly, boxing my ears and my mind and my ability to think.

I attempted to find that cat – it was never a cat in the first place but that little annoying light I realized a bit too late – in the darkness and amidst the voices, but my eyes couldn't find anything that might have replaced it.

And then it happened.

The cat was no longer a cat but that light again, bobbing in front of my eyes and I cupped my hands around it, engulfing its dim light and feeling it spread through me. I could feel it floating, happy to be close to me, which was so strange but somewhere in the time I spent here I could care less, only wanting to hold it and feel its energy forever.

And now you go…

The voices rose to an unbearable pitch and light flew through the abyss, piercing the darkness.

…back to where you've belonged…

My ears hurt now, as well as my mind and it was as if something was tearing, pulling my soul away with the light.

..all along.

And then I, the darkness, and the voices were gone.

--

Something bright was being burned into my closed eyes, and I was afraid of opening them in the case of the strange light piercing my very soul and blinding me forever.

"Subject seems to be unresponsive."

…What the hell?

I was lying on something very cold now, feeling my back numbing from it, my sweater and tank top barely keeping my skin warm. I dared open one eye once the voices floated away from me, taking in my surroundings blearily.

I sat up with a loud curse, not caring if anybody heard me now, and glanced wildly around.

There were angels. Angels everywhere. Male and female angels floated by me blankly – as if not noticing me even – with white wings and gothic little dresses and hats and hair. In the eternal words of teenagers:

What the flying fuck?

"I see you're awake."

I turned slowly, ever so slowly at the amused voice behind me, wishing that it was someone normal standing there and not one of the angel people because they were just so freaky.

Um, I guess I got my wish?

The voice belonged to a male that looked in his late twenties with spiky, auburn hair that covered one dark ruby-brown eye and a strange white and blue outfit consisting of many belts criss-crossing his entire body. A sword in a plain brown sheath hung from his left hip and against his leg.

All in all, he looked like a video game character. And, come to think of it, he looked awfully familiar.

"If you are well enough to walk," he continued, raising an eyebrow at my slightly-frightened look, "I suggest you follow me."

So he turned and started off to who-knows-where, his white swallow-tail cloak trailing behind him in a non-existent breeze. I stared after him for a few moments, uncertain, before a familiar voice chided me in my head.

Go on, he won't hurt you.

Startled, I jumped up from my position on the ground, head swiveling everywhere for the owner of the bodiless voice.

Hee, it giggled in my head and I calmed, realizing that neither the floating light nor the cat were nowhere to be found. Seeing as how the cheery voice was coming from inside of my mind, I tried telepathy as I dusted off my skirt.

…Who are you?

The thing – a 'she', by the pitch of it – went quiet for a moment, silently urging me to follow after the strange man while it considered its answer.

I am Mieu, I suppose. It finally answered with the name that started it all and I paused in mid-step. The man was waiting by a strange glowing platform on the floor a few feet away from me, watching me with crossed arms.

Yes, that is me. She decided intently before continuing again, sorrow entering her voice. I am sorry… I would show myself to you, to reassure you in person, but my mana signature would alert everybody here…

Now this was strange; mana signature? I knew I had heard that somewhere before – the same as this place. I was once here, but not exactly here here.

"Are you coming or not?"

I was smart enough to notice the irritation slowly growing in the man's voice so I nodded mentally to …Mieu, I guess… in my head before hurrying to catch up with him. He motioned with his head towards the panel and I peered at it, wondering what the hell it could do.

Sighing, Mystery Guy – as I shall call him for now – pushed me closer to it with one of his hands. I winced at the force of it, a little surprised at how strong he was; he certainly didn't look like it.

"It teleports you," he stated flatly and impatiently and I raised my eyes to his face, seeing as how he was quite taller than me.

"Um?" I said intelligently, switching my gaze between him and the blue warp panel. "Teleport? Are you sure that thing is safe?"

I groaned mentally; my 'childish' side, as I liked to call it, decided that this was a perfect time to show itself. No, I do not have split personalities, but I like considering myself at least somewhat mature so the side of me that was sealed away when I was thirteen tends to come up now and then.

Mystery Guy sighed again and pushed me further towards the panel – lighter now, I was glad to find – and trusting him, because I really had nothing to lose here except my life which I kind of doubted would happen, I stepped on it.

Now, let me tell you: never, never in the world would you want to go through this. Let's see, teleporting, as he called it, makes you feel as if you a re on a steep roller coaster that just went into its highest dive, and you have nothing to clutch onto to feel safe because you can't move, since your lungs feel like they've stopped pumping in air and it feels like you'll stop breathing all together.

This lasts only a split millisecond, but it was enough for me. I barely managed to keep myself upright once the darkness in my eyes disappeared only to be replaced by a white room, feeling Mystery Guy steady my shoulder so I wouldn't fall. Groaning, and attempting to calm my stomach so I wouldn't upturn my lunch, I looked up and around me.

Another man was standing here, in the center of the room, looking a bit younger than Mystery Guy. I couldn't see his face, because his back was facing us, but I could see his light blonde hair stretching a bit past his shoulders and the absolutely white outfit he wore.

What threw me off, again, were the wings sprouting from his back.

They weren't like the standard, white wings people imagine them to be; these ones were large and translucent, a strange mix of pink and purple. There appeared to be no feathers whatsoever, only pure energy surging through them and making them shine.

Kind of like Mieu as the shining sphere I chased.

"Lord Yggdrasill," Mystery Guy began emotionlessly, "I've brought the child you've wanted."

Strange Guy turned to face us and I swear my blood froze in my veins because I remember that face – I've never seen it this clear or this realistic before, but I perfectly well can recall the many times I glared at it and cursed it and wanted to slug it. …Along with laughing at the skin-tight outfit.

"Perfect," the blonde man – Seraphim – nodded, eyes trailing over us quickly. It was silent for a few moments, and I took that time to gladly blank out and think.

Ever since school and volleyball started up for me, I haven't touched the video games I played over the summer once. That included this particular game, including these two guys and this place. Mieu, so inconveniently, appeared to have left me to brood on my own so I couldn't receive any answers.

First and foremost question: what the hell was I doing in a game!? And this one, of all games? In the presence of Mithos Yggdrasill, the almost-psycho leader of Cruxis?

"So tell me, child." Mithos began, and I flew back to reality again. "What are you doing here?' His face seemed amused, but I could see the suspiciousness darkening in his green eyes.

Okay, stay calm. Stay calm, don't think of what he could do to you… Aw, shit, this is not working.

"Um," Okay, okay not workiiiiing… Mieu, some help?

Let me take over.

Before I could even question her what she meant, something strange started happening to my body. It was almost as if my blood – no, not my blood, something else, something different – was drained out of me, and the same, pleasant energy I felt earlier in that abyss from Mieu overtook me.

I could feel my body straightening up, looking right at Mithos. Curious, I watched what would happen.

"My apologies," Mieu began, and I somehow didn't find it that shocking to hear my own voice come out with her words. "But I am afraid I've no idea what is happening right now what-so-ever as well. Whether you believe this or not is your choice, but I tell the truth when I say I have absolutely no idea where I currently am."

Hey, wait. Mieu did know what was going on – she was the one who brought me here! Astonished, I continued watching from a bystander's point of view as Mithos brought a hand to his chin in thought.

"You are currently in Welgaia," he finally stated, confirming my suspicions – although I haven’t played the game for a few weeks now, my memory of it remained intact. "Tell me," he continued. "Is there anything…useful, you could do to help us? I'm afraid that otherwise, we would simply need to kill you."

My blood froze again – kill me!? And he sounded so serious about it…

"You see, it appears that you mana is rather interesting, shall we say." A smile tugged at his lips. "It would be a pity to let such things go to waste."

Wait, my mana? That's your spirit in a way, right? For this world, anyway – and what did he mean by interesting? Did Mieu merging with me change the appearance of it?

I am so confused.

Suddenly, I could feel the cat-spirit-thing in question ruffling through my memories. Panicking, I attempted to lurch back inside my body – only to find something blocking me.

Don't worry, she suddenly whispered to me. I am simply attempting to find something to satisfy him – we don't want you dead now, do we?

Her words struck me deeply, but I had no time to reply to her with questions. Taking control of my vocal chords again, she gave a small affirmative nod.

"I believe I could be quite useful in deception and gaining trust of others—" I almost choked here; not because it wasn't true, but because that's what half of the game was about. "—If the need arises. My fighting abilities are scarce, but I can easily improve."

Mithos looked in thought for a few more minutes before nodding. "Very well. Kratos, please show her to her new room if you will. It should be ready." He turned back to me just as Mieu left my body, feeling her deed was done. "What is your name?"

The way Mieu spoke – so much like I usually did, although unfortunately not now – gave me new encouragement to face the Seraphim.

"Ellone, sir." I replied as calmly as I could.

He smirked in satisfaction. "Alright then, Ellone, Kratos will be teaching you in the ways of battle from now on. Kratos, I believe you know what to do?"

Kratos nodded, and I hit myself mentally for not remembering him earlier. "Yes, Lord Yggdrasill." Turning to me again before striding back to the warp panel, I had no choice but to follow him. Feeling a little better after the initial feeling of the warp panel, I sighed quietly to myself.

What had I gotten myself into?

--

The room in which I was to board in was, unsurprisingly, just as white as the rest of the place. It was fairly big, with a large queen-sized bed in the center of it and two large windows by on each side. A small, black side-table was also there, matching the black and red covers on the bed. A built-in closet stood across from the left window and to the left of from where I entered, as well as a tall mirror and a desk against the walls.

Kratos – Master Kratos, as I was to call him now – told me to be ready to meet with him in fifteen minutes, nodding his head towards the clock on my wall. The extra clothes he told me I was to change into for my training lay peacefully on my bed, and being the girl that I am, I immediately went to expect them.

Actually, they looked exactly like some of the clothes I had at home – there were a few copies of the clothes I wore now, along with another pair of brown boots and white jeans that I loved. I picked them up and slipped them on, glad that I didn't have to do any fighting in a skirt. There was also a weird thing that looked like a white and golden-edged scarf, but when I picked it up it turned out to be something that you clipped onto your shoulders like a mini-cloak.

I tried it on, happy to find that it fit, and twirled in front of the mirror to watch the wing-like ends of it fall all the way down to my fingers. Grinning at my look – blue, white, and brown striped sweater, black tank-top, white jeans and a black short skirt tucked into my brown boots – I started fiddling with the wings, feeling that something was missing.

What was it that almost every video game character I've seen had? …What did Kratos have?

Belts. Belts everywhere.

Scanning the clothes left on my bed, I finally found what I was looking for: three brown belts. Finding it incredibly easy to slip them on and off, I tied one around my waist and two over it in a Kratos-like fashion.

Smiling wickedly, I sighed and plopped down on my bed. I guess I could worry about what was happening in the real world now, seeing as I had the time – did I just disappear, fall into a coma and only have my consciousness here, or what? Maybe time never passed there, or I'm even dreaming this whole thing up.

I pinched myself just in case, wincing when I found it hurt. Oh, well… maybe Mieu had some answers.

Mieu?

I tried calling to her again, but to no avail. Five minutes passed… I still had nothing to do and I had another five before Kratos arrived. Walking over to the desk, I attempted to find something to brush my hair with, seeing as how it was in horrible tangles.

Instead, I found my volleyball bag.

After staring it for a few seconds, I grabbed it up from underneath the wooden study desk and rummaged through it, going past my uniform and some other stuff before finally locating my hairbrush. Grabbing it out I let down my hair and tore it – gently – through, biting my lip when I hit an especially big tangle.

Thirty seconds left, says the clock, so I put down my precious hairbrush and tied my hair back up again in a high ponytail, tucking my side bangs behind my ears and brushing my normal ones away from my eyes.

And three, two, one…

The knock that came right the second it hit 6:30 PM wasn't too unexpected, but I still snorted to myself and went over to open it. Which meant that I had to become my mature self again, after Kratos seeing how I acted with Mithos.

Thankfully, my childish side was retreating.

"Are you ready?"

I nodded at the auburn-haired man's words and closed my door to follow after him yet again, weaving through the hallways until we stopped at what appeared to be a training center of sorts.

"Are you aware of what Exspheres are?" Kratos suddenly asked, turning to glance at me over his shoulder.

"Yes," I answered, shifting uncomfortably at the thought. I, personally, didn't find the truth about them too revolting when I played the game, but this was, once again, now reality.

"Alright then." Kratos turned to face me fully, crossing his arms before starting his explanation. "Lord Yggdrasill believes that you should wield a Cruxis Crystal if you are to accompany me for when the Chosen is here."

I blinked. Then blinked again. Cruxis Crystal…? Accompany him…? "If I may, what did you mean by the words 'accompany you'?" I knew what Cruxis Crystals did – I think. They were the ones Mithos, Yuan, Kratos and Collette had – the ones that turned them into angels.

I paled slightly.

"The Day of the Oracle will occur in two months time – Lord Yggdrasill wishes to test your claim by letting you come with me and escort the Chosen to the Tower of Salvation." All of this was said in one breath by the Seraphim in front of me, and I blanked.

"Oh. I understand."

Actually, I didn't. How did I even know if this was Collette we were talking about? What if this is, say, a hundred years before her time?

This is her journey. Do not worry.

…Why does Mieu never come when I really need her?

I apologize; I had some business to take care of. I will be with you starting in a few days, so please be patient until then.

Now I felt guilty; Mieu sounded as if she really wanted to help me. I sent my answer back to her reassuringly before returning back to Kratos.

"Now that that is over," he started, reaching into one of his pockets and bringing out a strange, diamond-shaped crystal, "Are you aware of what Cruxis Crystals are and how they are different from normal Exspheres?"

I bit my bottom lip nervously. "Yes, Master Kratos." Kratos nodded again in silent approval.

"Good." I held out my hand as he passed me the crystal, and I examined it, turning it in my fingers as the blue and gold reflected in the light. I felt kind of sick, but then kind of numb, knowing that this was someone's life.

"Master Kratos," I started, a question growing fearfully in my mind. "The Cruxis Crystal… will I be loosing my abilities as a human, as the Chosen does?"

Kratos raised an eyebrow, and I got the odd feeling that I wasn't supposed to know that. "Not quite. The Cruxis Crystal requires a certain amount of time to activate; your ability to sleep and eat will dim, however your ability to feel will stay intact. Your wings, as well, will not appear until you have unlocked the Crystal's true power."

I stared at the crystal, clutching it in my hand. "Oh. Alright." This was all… so strange. Here I was, in the universe of a video game, holding something in my hand that was so important and working for the Bad Guys.

…This all just didn't work out.

"Now then," he interrupted my musings, opening the door in front of us. "If you would so kindly equip that, we can begin our training."

Translation: Get the damn thing on your skin so we can get this over with.

I gulped, bringing the Cruxis Crystal up to my collarbone and gently holding it against it. To my surprise – and slight disgust – it glowed slightly for a few seconds before reappearing just below my neck and the collar of my sleeve-less sweater.

It didn't hurt.

I prodded it with my fingers, finding it strange to find the hard surface underneath them. The blue orb itself glinted and reflected light now and then, and the golden part – which I guessed was the key-crest, because of the ruins engraved on it – glowed dimly as well.

I repeat myself: This all was just plain weird.

Sighing and leaving it alone for now, I entered after Kratos and looked around. It appeared to be a weapons room, with numerous things stacked on shelves and on the floor. There were swords, bows, axes, staffs… even sealing cards, like the ones Sheena used.

"Here."

I barely had time to catch the item that was thrown at me, but the Cruxis Crystal – let's call it my Exsphere for now – helped my body in time and I managed to hold the two weapons in my arms without staggering or dropping them pitifully on the floor.

They appeared to be daggers, about three quarters the length of my arms, with a circular hold so it was easier to wield them. They were black in color, mostly, with bright green decorative circles on the insides of the rims.

I snickered, recognizing them as a version of someone else's weapons from another game. Nevertheless, I slid my fingers alongside the sharp ends and gripped them, swinging out to try and get the feel of them.

I winced as the hard metal bit into my skin, making a mental reminder to get gloves to keep my skin free of any weapon-induced injuries.

Here, a gift from me.

And just like that, while Kratos was inspecting something away from me, simple black fingerless gloves appeared on my hands.

I almost dropped the weapons in surprise before attempting to grip them again, thanking Mieu rapidly when I found that the sharp edges of my new weapon stayed safely on the rims of my new gloves.

"With your body shape and height, it seems that those daggers will be most fit for you." Kratos observed, watching me with slight amusement as I struck out into imaginary enemies.

My eye twitched at his words and I froze in mid-strike; body shape and body height!? Okay, it's not my fault I'm a stupid 5'2 and thin as a stick; blame it on my dumb cells and volleyball coaching!

Of course, I never said any of that out-loud in fear of getting my ass handed to me, so instead I settled for glaring venomously at the white-clad Seraphim.

I watched again as Kratos went through some more weapons before coming back with a thin sheath, handing it to me. "For emergencies," he explained curtly and I slid my daggers into some other leather sheaths I found for them, drawing the sword instead. It wasn't anything special – the blade looked as if it was made of pure silver and the handle was black; I tried striking out again, glad when I found it relatively light.

"We begin training now, then. Follow me." I did as Kratos commanded, entering a large room after him. He positioned himself opposite of me in the center, and I followed his actions.

"You will first learn how to use the daggers. Understood?" Damn, he was cold. I mean, really cold. Sure, he showed some signs of emotions – such as annoyance – towards me in the past hour and a half or so, but it was as if I was nothing to him.

I shrugged at myself; after all, I really was nothing to him. Just some random person that popped up in a city that normal people didn't really know about.

"Understood," I replied, masking my voice as emotionlessly as I could. I slid my daggers out and tightened my grip on them, sliding one leg out in a small crouch. I never used daggers before – what the hell was I supposed to do?

Kratos drew his shield, but not his sword. I blinked curiously at him and he smirked tauntingly. "We will work on attacking – attempt to land a hit on me."

My eye twitched again, but I had a strange feeling I was going to get used to his taunts. I slid lower before starting at a run towards him, running faster than ever before I did in volleyball with my Exsphere. It was odd, again, how something was flowing through my veins.

…Was it mana?

I shook my thoughts away, focusing on the task before me. I knew Kratos was a good swordsman, and the chances of me getting a hit on him on my first try were slim to none. But nevertheless, I had to try, right? It's just like my volleyball coach said – if you don't go for the ball, you'll never know if you could have made that save or not.

I veered to the right, attempting to stab the man, only to be blocked by his shield. I wanted to scowl at him – but instead, I kept my face empty like I taught myself before matches and tried again, imagining this was just like some new, normal volleyball technique Coach wanted drilled into our heads before our next game.

Go around him.

There was no time for me to question Mieu, only to follow her advice. I sped behind him, aiming for his unguarded back. I knew it wouldn’t work – he's had far more training than I did, and his shield proved it.

He smirked again at me as I struggled to push away his shield with my daggers. "Smart, I must admit."

I smiled slightly at the small praise, jumping away to recover my breath.

Thanks, Mieu.

And then I charged right again.

--

In the two months that passed, every day seemed the same. I would wake up at what was considered dawn here, wash up, have my breakfast delivered by one of the angels, then have training practice with Kratos for a few hours. After lunch, I would be allowed to wander around the castle-place, and I would usually watch the angels go by on their daily routines.

It was sad and pitiful, in a way, how they all were so cold and emotionless. I knew the Crystals made them like that – I sometimes even wondered if Kratos lied to me, and if I was going to turn into another puppet for Mithos. But no; as I advanced in my training, I could feel my need for food and sleep slowly depleting. But the feeling was never gone – I could always feel the bruises and the cuts, and the stale air on my face, and the coldness of my room.

I would usually have another practice session with Kratos after dinner, unless he was busy – which he was rarely, and I began to think at one time that he just lazed around this place – then be forced to retire to my room and stay there. It was boring for the first few days, with me nursing my injuries and cursing my teacher with every word I knew; until Mieu came.

She usually appeared in her little cat shape, the same black one with the white shawl and the white forehead. Sometimes, she would be the small orb, buzzing around my room and telling me stories of this world.

She told me of Mithos the Hero – which I found incredibly funny and ironic – of the Chosens that failed, of what was happening in Sylvarant and Tethe'alla; those kinds of things.

After a few weeks, I was shown the grand library – and let me tell you, it was huge! And being the bookworm that I naturally was, I spent almost all of my free time there. By then, Kratos decided to let me practice with my sword to learn some necessary techniques, in the cases that I ever lost my daggers.

Not like I'd ever lose them. Really. Um, maybe?

Okay, I'm kind of known to lose things.

But the end of these two months was fast approaching; the angel, the angel I always oh-so-much hated by the name of Remiel would descend down to the village of Iselia and Collette would receive her Cruxis Crystal.

And Kratos and I would be joining them.

I was always worried, in the back of my mind, how I would get along with them – Mieu mentioned that in order for me to get back home, when I asked her, I would need to complete the 'game'. And getting to the end meant journeying with them for a very long time – no more five-minute walks from town to town.

Collette… I didn't know how well I'd get along with her. She was a sweet girl in the game, if not a bit annoying… I didn't have a grudge against her or anything, but then again, I never actually felt sorry for her either. She always came off as such an airhead, but she tried to make the best of things; opposite of me, I guess you could say?

Raine and Genis; I didn't have anything against them, or half-elves, even if I was not exactly fond of Genis and his whininess. With Raine, I would probably be the one running around with her screeching 'MARVELOUS!' on the top of my lungs whenever we would stumble upon ruins… heh.

Lloyd… oh god, Lloyd. I don't even know about him. He is such a great character but such an idiot that you want to strangle at the same time. I hate his outfit, but he is so much fun to cheer on in one of his little speeches, and how he does everything in his power to help Collette… I guess we'll just have to see.

The Tethe'allans, I don't think I'll see for quite some time – with the exception of Sheena. I'd probably get along with her, because we're kind of similar in our attitudes, I think. Zelos… well, Zelos is Zelos; the same perverted Chosen that decides to betray you. I don't think I'll ever forgive him when this happens here.

Presea and Regal – well, I personally loved Presea and her past, as well as Regal but not so much. You… don't really converse with them as much in the game – at least, when I played – so I have no personal opinions on them. I'd probably annoy them both, though.

And Kratos – well, it's Kratos. I've spent two months with him now, and to tell the truth, I think I've grown quite close to him and Mieu; both of them. I'm pretty sure I've started looking up at him as the 'Big Brother' figure. Maybe because he reminds me of my friend's brother, who always promised us to teach us karate, but never got around to it. I haven't managed to see him for a few years now, because after college he moved away somewhere…

I can't really look up to Kratos as the 'Father' figure, because one: it's Lloyd's job and two: he looks old enough to be my brother, and I can hardly imagine him being the person who wrote half of the history books I've read.

Mieu is an enigma; she's sometimes there, sometimes not. I've never asked her what happened, in that black abyss with the singing voices and the painful light, because I know the answers will hurt me. And I suspect she knows that too – we never talk about my life back home. I never ask, never ponder, and she never answers. It's become a silent rule between us.

I…still wonder about my home. My parents, my friends. What did happen, that night I appeared here? Do I… even want to know?

No, I don't. It'll hurt too much.

Besides; I've grown used to life here. Kratos has been treating me much more like a person instead of a thing, and I've gotten better at conversing with Mithos without worrying about consequences all the time. And I still remember what will happen in the future – every single bit of it. But have I changed anything here? After all – I don't belong in this universe.

My fighting has gotten much better too, to the point where I can spar with Kratos if he holds back his full powers, and he's promised I can start learning angel techniques soon, as well. Of course, it'll have to be done in secret, but yeah. I have to admit – I'm excited. My wings, he says, should appear when we reach the Tower of Salvation – that is, if I manage to train enough by that time.

So I'll train hard – tomorrow, the day after that, and when we finally arrive at Iselia. I never want to be a hindrance to them, to Kratos, or to anyone. And when we do reach the Tower of Salvation – when that turning point comes, I'll decide what to do.

Until then, well… I'll be stuck in this castle, this empty world, with Mieu, Kratos, and sometimes Mithos as my only company.

…