Author: Spidey3000 PM
Ever want to ask Ash something? Well now you can, along with Freddy, Jason, Hannibal, Clarice, Sidney Prescotte, Michael Myers, and Norman Bates. Warning: Randomness, naked hugs, and Micheal Jackson cameos. Also known as Ask the Horror Movie IconsRated: Fiction T - English - Humor/Horror - Chapters: 45 - Words: 65,190 - Reviews: 65 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 10-31-10 - Published: 10-21-07 - id: 3849377
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Spidey3000: Welcome, You all know me as Spidey3000, but my real name is...-car drives by and honks horn loudly- though you can call me Spidey30, or just Spidey for short. Are you a fan of horror movies? Ever want to ask Freddy why he's so messed up? Or Jason why he kills? Or Ash why he's such a badass? Well now is your chance, cause I'm about to kidnap them and others for your entertainment. Anime characters will also make randomn cameos for no reason what soever. You may ask questions via reviews, and perform actions by placing them between - signs, for example -Slaps people who don't intend to review- Now to introduce our first guest, Ashley J. Williams!
-Ash appears out of nowhere-
Ash: Come get some...where the hell am I?
Spidey: You in an ask fic. You will be forced to answer questions of anyone who reviews.
Ash: Noooooooooooooo! -falls to knees and laughs insanely-
Spidey: And now for our second prisoner...I mean guest: Freddy Krueger!
-Freddy appears out of nowhere-
Freddy: Hey, where's that female dog Lori? And where the derogatory term for sexual intercourse am I? And what's with filtering the profanity?
Spidey: I'll answer those questions in order: probably still in her bed sleeping, you're in a secret location that I won't disclose at this time, and I'd like to keep this T-rated thanks. Oh, and this is an Ask fic in case you're wondering.
Freddy: But I thought they only did that with Naruto characters?
Spidey: Not anymore they don't. Our next guest shall be...
Freddy: female dog I'll kill you! -charges at Spidey-
Spidey: -kicks him in the balls, then throws him across the room- Don't mess with the author, I have crazy ninja skills. I also have author powers. Observe. -Freddy is suddenly mauled by an enraged kitten- Now don't mess with me, or I'll put you in a Freddy/Jason Lemon, understand?
Freddy: -gulps- Yes boss, whatever you say.
Spidey: Good, speaking of Jason, he's our next guest!
Jason:...-walks toward Spidey with Machete-
Spidey: Um...look it's Freddy!
Jason: -walks towards Freddy-
Freddy: You're goin' down this time! -fights Jason for several hours-
Jason: -returns from fight with Freddy-
Spidey: So who won?
Spidey: Really? I never expected that. Now before you try to kill me, how would you like to be able to talk? -uses author powers to give him ability to talk-
Jason: Like you could give me the...I can talk! Now I can finally express myself without murdering teenagers...
Jason: Yes...but it's gonna be hard to give up killing.
Spidey: Well that's good. Now on to our next guest: Hannible Lector.
-you guys know the drill by now-
Hannible: Where am I? Wait, let me guess: this is some sort of Ask fic, and I'm making a cameo. Where are the Naruto characters than?
Spidey: There are none, this is a horror movie ask fic inspired by a Naruto ask fic. You will begin to answer questions as soon as I get reviews.
Hannible: And why should I stay here? I'm quite smart enough to escape on my own, so I really don't need to stay here. And there is nothing you could do to convince me to sink so low as to be in an Ask...
Spidey: How about a lifetime supply of meat, and five minutes in the closet with Clarice?
Spidey: I have a bad feeling I'm gonna go bankrupt. Now for our next two guests: Clarice Sterling, and Michael Myers.
-they appear out of nowhere-
Hannible: -to Clarice- Would you like to spend five minutes in the closet with me doing things that I'd rather not mention due to the fact that this story is most likely T-rated?
Hannible: -gets sad look on face-
Clarice: Make it ten minutes! -drags him into closet-
Spidey: Well, looks like I won't have a problem getting her to stay without violence.
Michael: -pulls out butcher knife, and walks towards Spidey-
Spidey: Before you kill me, I have something you might want. -holds out an old, worn out stuffed unicorn-
Michael: Rainbow Mane? -grabs stuffed animal and hugs it- I thought they took you away from me!
Spidey: You can talk? I thought you were mute?
Michael: I could talk all along, I just chose not to. Now what do you ask of me?
Spidey: How about staying here and answering questions from reviewers?
Spidey: Now there are only two more guests, so I'll just summon them both at once: Sidney Prescott, and Norman Bates.
-Norman Bates appears out of nowhere, followed by Sidney, who was apparently in the shower when she was summoned-
Sidney: I'm singin' in the rain, I'm happy agai...-screams when she notices she's not in the shower anymore and surrounded by males-
Spidey: -nosebleeds and faints-
Norman: -gets weird look in eye and talks like an old woman- Oh dear, this woman is naked, she must have been trying to seduce my poor dear son. She shall have to be punished! -charges at Sidney-
Sidney: Heeyahl! -kicks "Mother" right in the happy place- Any body else want some? You've got about ten seconds to tell me what the heck is going on before I bust out a can of whoopass on you all!
Hannible: -walks out of closet- Spidey, this is embarassing but do you have any Via...oh dear, the author seems to have fainted. I shall take over this story till he wakes up. Sidney was it? Yeah, as for where we are, I have no idea, but we are apparently in some kind of ask fic for horror movie Icons.
Sidney: Wait, I thought only Naruto characters got into ask fics; what are we doing here?
Hannible: Well, Spidey probably thought some other characters should get ask fics. We should ask him when he's concious.
Spidey: -wakes up- Did I miss any...-sees Sidney naked, and faints again-
Sidney: Well, maybe if I had some clothes, he won't faint again next time.
Hannible: That's a great idea! I've already found where he keeps the clo...
Clarice: -sticks head out of closet- Hannible come back to the closet.
Hannible: Gotta run! -goes back in closet-
Spidey: -wakes up again- Well, that's all the characters, please review, the story depends on it.
Ash: So what do we do now?
Spidey: We wait for reviews.
Freddy: Well, what are we gonna do till we get reviews?
Spidey: Hmm... Sidney, start dancing.
Sidney: Why should I?
Spidey: -pulls out Sidney's diary- "Dear Diary, Today I watched...
Sidney: OKAY! How about some music? -gets music, and starts dancing-
-all the males except nosebleed and faint-
Sidney: Read and Review, and you can watch me dancing naked! -keeps dancing-