For a warning: OOC-ly depressed Zell and kind of a dark theme. Reviews welcomed.

Ten Minutes

Tick. Ten to four.

Ten minutes to another humiliation, ten minutes before everyone would know he was going crazy, ten minutes left to turn and run away. He didn’t run away. He never did. He had thought about it – every time, actually – but he never left. It was, after all, for his own good. It was meant to make his life better, meant to teach him to enjoy life again.

Ha, as if. He had forgotten how to enjoy life a long time ago, and he wasn’t interested to listen to the woman’s crap about getting better soon and that maybe he should try the pills after all.

He wasn’t going to. Never, not even if his life depended on it. He wasn’t that weak. It would change him even more, and another part of him would be blown away, just like that.

He could make it on his own.

Tick. Nine to four.

Nine minutes left. And after those nine minutes were over came one of the longest forty-five minutes of his life. He would nod and agree with everything, and after that, seven days that he would count like these minutes while sitting on the sofa and waiting for his doom, and then another forty-five minutes. And the cycle repeated itself.

It had repeated itself for two years now.

But he didn’t complain – he wasn’t supposed to. After all, it was for his own sanity. At least it was supposed to be... he wasn’t completely sure, though. It sure as hell wasn’t working, if someone asked him. And no one did.

Tick. Eight to four.

His palms were sweating, but he didn’t realize it. His heart was beating fast in his chest, faster than normally. It happened every time, so he didn’t pay any special attention to it as he glanced at the clock. Still eight to four. He started to fiddle with the hem of his shirt, trying to tear his eyes away from the clock. He hated that awful light-blue clock, why was it there, anyway? He gathered all his willpower and forced himself to look around in the room – anywhere but the clock – and he noticed that he was alone.

Noticed? No, he had known it from the beginning. There were never others around, which made him wonder if it was such a wise idea to stay there. Maybe he should just leave...

And there was the clock again, perfectly in his view. Soon he would start counting the seconds.

Three, two, one...

Tick. Seven to four.

“Hey.”

He jumped slightly at the unexpected voice and turned to look over his shoulder. He calmed down considerably when he saw that it wasn’t her, yet. A few weeks before he would have smiled, but that wasn’t the case now. “Hi, Seifer.”

Seifer chuckled slightly and sat down onto the sofa, next to Zell. “Going to see Mrs. Kent?”

Zell frowned, his eyes drawn into slits as he mumbled, “That woman’s a bitch.”

“I’ll take that as a yes, then,” Seifer said, crossing his arms behind his head. They were silent.

Tick. Six to four.

“So... How are you?”

“Don’t do this to me.”

Seifer smiled a little sheepishly. He knew Zell hated it when people asked how he was doing, and he also knew Zell hadn’t minded it before, but... “Sorry.” He received no reply. It wasn’t a surprise, though, Zell never spoke to anyone unless he absolutely had to. That was another thing that had changed in Zell. Usually he was blabbering on and on, smiling and laughing all the time. Not anymore. “No, but really. Feeling any better?”

“I’m not made of glass, Seifer.”

“I know you’re not.”

Silence. Then: “Why are you here?”

Seifer shrugged. “I remembered that you come here on Tuesdays. Wanted to see how you were doing.”

“Oh.”

A sigh. “Why won’t you talk to me anymore?”

“I thought you didn’t want me to.”

“I never said that. I just said you needed some time and not that you should stop talking to people.” Another short silence. “Everyone’s worried about you. They told me to say hi to you for them.”

“I see. So they know I’m still coming here?”

“Yeah. They do.”

Tick. Five to four.

“They don’t think you’re crazy, Zell. I don’t, either.”

Zell snorted. “Well maybe I do. Ma does, anyway.”

Seifer turned to face Zell fully and took his hand into his. Zell was startled by the sudden contact, but said nothing. “You’re not crazy, you know it, Zell. It’s just this place and that weird woman. They make you think that way.”

“She’s more than weird,” Zell said darkly. “She’s turned Ma against me, too. They’re probably gonna send me away.”

Seifer noticed, actually felt, that Zell was shaking. He frowned. “What makes you think that?”

Zell shook his head, telling Seifer quietly that he didn’t know. He really didn’t know. He didn’t know anything anymore. He could only hear the clock ticking on the background, why couldn’t someone silence that thing? It was driving him up a wall, stupid clock. After a few more seconds of silence, he said, “I’m scared.”

“Scared?” Seifer echoed. Asking would maybe be pushing his luck, but... “What are you scared of?”

Zell merely shook his head, refusing to face Seifer or say anything.

Seifer sighed and pulled Zell against his chest like he used to when Zell was feeling down. He missed those days... he really did. “C’mon, you can tell me.” Silence. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to, though...”

Tick. Four to four.

Zell made himself comfortable, leaning his head against Seifer’s shoulder before answering, “I... I don’t know,” he whispered, grasping a handful of Seifer’s shirt like a child would its mother’s after waking up from a nightmare.

“You do know,” Seifer said softly. “I think I know, too. Mind if I voice my assumption?” Zell shook his head slightly, which was enough for Seifer. “You’re scared you’ll be left alone. I know you, Zell. You think that we think you’re not the Zell you used to be and that everyone will abandon you. Am I right?” Zell was quiet for a while, as if thinking, but Seifer knew he simply didn’t want to answer, which meant he was right. “Remember when we last talked about this? About you being depressed?”

“Yeah. You broke up with me after than conversation.”

Seifer scowled. “That... wasn’t the point.”

“Oh. What’s the point, then?”

“That you’re not alone,” Seifer told him sternly. “We’ll be here for you if you just let us. And the most important thing you must remember is that we all love you just the way you are, nothing will change that. Not your depression, not the fact that you’re getting help for it, and certainly not that weird-ass psychologist that goes around planting ideas into your head.”

Tick. Three to four.

Zell’s grip on Seifer’s shirt tightened. “Do you... Do you still...”

“Yes,” Seifer answered the only half-spoken question, smiling. “Of course I do. You’ll always be my little Chicken-wuss,” he said, turning to look at Zell. “Right?”

A barely-there smile stretched Zell’s lips. It was really tiny, but it was there as he nodded and answered, “Right,” and closed his eyes, sighing in contentment. He had forgotten how safe it felt to be in Seifer’s arms like that.

The rest of the minute was spent in silence, but it didn’t feel so uncomfortable anymore.

Tick. Two to four.

“Well then,” Seifer said and started to stand up, which made Zell look at him in confusion. “You’re gonna ditch that bitch, right? So let’s go, you’ve always told me how you hate to come here, anyway.”

Zell glanced to the clock, biting his lower lip. Two minutes...

Seifer waited patiently, watching Zell stare at the clock as if it was going to give him the answers he needed.

“Yeah,” Zell then said and took Seifer’s hand. “Let’s go.”

Seifer smiled and started to lead them out of the building. “Great. We could go eat something, you look like you haven’t eaten today at all. What do you say if I call the others to join us? I’m sure they’ll all come running when they hear you’re coming, too.”

“Yeah, okay,” Zell said quietly. “That’d be nice.”

They walked downstairs and reached the main door, still holding hands.

Tick. One to four.

He was glad that Seifer had come to take him away from that place – he wasn’t sure how long he would have been able to stay sane in there. Which made him wonder, wasn’t it supposed to be meant to help him, not make him feel even worse about himself?

He smiled up at Seifer, who looked surprised for a moment, but then returned the hesitant smile as he dialled the number of one of their friends, asking if she would like to catch a bus to the town and have something to eat with them. The smile on Zell’s lips widened ever so slightly when he heard the girlish shout of ‘YEAHH’ when Seifer told her that Zell was going to come, as well, and she hung up after loudly declaring that she would call the others and force them to come if she had to.

Zell turned to look over his shoulder as they left the building, and he was glad that he wasn’t there to hear the final ‘tick’ as the clock hit four a while later.