Tuesday—

I came back to Devon. I couldn’t handle another day at home with no one but my parents. No one at school could be relied upon, least of all Gene. He wasn’t my friend in the least anymore. I’d stayed mainly in Mr. Carhart’s office to avoid being seen, but I’d left to hear the chapel service. I needed a bit of God to help me, and Finny saw me. He could be trusted though and probably wouldn’t tell anyone, except Gene, but who cares if Gene knew. I sure as hell didn’t.

A couple of boy came to get me in the night. They said I was needed for something involving Phineas. I’d had a bit of a pity for Finny ever since his accident. He was looking well when I came into the assembly hall, if a bit worried. Brinker stood next to him. I didn’t see Gene anywhere in this immediate vicinity but didn’t look around for him. I asked Finny what I could do, but it was obvious Brinker was in charge here. He always had to be in charge. He asked me a question; I explained, then I heard Gene’s voice say something, but I didn’t turn to look.

Brinker kept talking, draining me for details. I explained what I’d seen, the silhouettes, the tree, the sun. He cut in asking for things that should have been obvious to anyone listening. He’d never been this interested any other time I spoke. I sort of wanted to punch him over the short space that separated us. He asked about who was ahead on the branch. I knew it was Finny; he was always the first one when it came to him and Gene, but I said I didn’t know because it would drive Brinker out of his mind not to know. This was important to him, and to me because I had everything he wanted. I answered dully and simply to the rest of his questions, saying they moved like an engine. Oh, the look on Brinker’s face! I led them in circles talking about that stupid engine until someone spoke over me. I assumed my turn was over until Brinker queried me again. He’d never said more than ten words to me before and now I was suddenly the most interesting thing on earth. Brinker didn’t want to talk to me at all; he just wanted to know every damned thing about that stupid accident. His obsession upset Phineas to the point of running from the room. Then he fell down the stairs.

I heard Finny died, which is quite a shame. He didn’t deserve to die, I don’t think. I’m quite sure what to do now. Staying at Devon is probably a wise choice. I can just wait for the war to come get if it needs me, but I’ll just stay alone, continuing my life as a leper.

—Leper