A/N: So it’s been quite some time. I deleted “Sing to the Dawn” because I’m losing interest and that I’m getting busier with the training camp looming over me, so I’ll post this instead. I’m not really that fond of KiraXCagalli but I recently got interest in this after watching janusfrost’s video, Far Away – A Kira & Cagalli Tribute. It’s worth checking out. This oneshot is influenced by Return of the Condor Heroes.

Disclaimer: I don’t own Gundam Seed or anything related to it. And not Star Wars either. And definitely not Return of the Condor Heroes. Heck, I don’t even own the computer!

Unspoken Love

It was a little after noon at Reverend Malchio’s when Kira found Cagalli out on the balcony, staring at the sky and (Kira suspected) dozing off. He left the room of laughing children and joined her.

“Hey, sis-” he stumbled over the word. “-er, Cagalli!” She didn’t even notice it, but Kira was worried she did, and hoped she’d chalk it up to unfamiliarity. After all, they hadn’t been siblings for very long.

For a few moments neither of them spoke. Then Kira asked casually, “How’s the reconstruction on Onogoro going?”

Cagalli jerked as though she had received an electric shock. “Huh? Oh, fine, I guess.” She was forcing her eyes open, and the hand that wasn’t gripping the railing was propped under her chin to keep her head up. “We have enough buildings to house maybe a quarter of Onogoro’s population now, though there’re some who don’t want to come back.”

“I’m sorry,” Kira apologised, though he knew it wasn’t his fault. He, like Cagalli, watched the island go up in flames to destroy the mass driver, and he knew it couldn’t have been easy for Cagalli to watch her country and her father die just like that.

Cagalli muttered something that could have been “Not your fault.” Kira’s thoughts drifted back to Uzumi’s last gift to Cagalli: a picture of a mother holding her two children. It had shocked both of them to find out that they were the twins featured in the photo.

“Do you ever wish that we never found out about this? That we’re twins, I mean,” Kira asked randomly, not really expecting an answer.

Cagalli started at the abrupt change in topic, but then smiled. A little, at least. “Yes and no. Sort of.”

Kira was curious. She had said yes, in a way. Did that mean…? No, there was no way. Better not to think about it. Yet, his curiosity would not let him keep quiet. “How so?” he questioned.

“Well, for one, I’d prefer it if it were my father or your parents explaining it all to us, not some twisted ZAFT commander whatever-his-name-is…”

“Rau Le Creuset,” interrupted Kira. The thought of the creepy masked man still haunted his dreams.

“Yeah, whatever,” Cagalli frowned, since she didn’t really care about the name of a dead criminal. “But if he didn’t tell us the truth, when do you think your parents would have gotten around to telling us the whole story? What might have happened if we don’t know about this is too strange to contemplate.”

Kira, watching Cagalli’s face pull into the frown he knew so well, couldn’t help but smile. “Our story sounds like something out of a science fiction, doesn’t it? Or a movie.”

“Star Wars, maybe,” suggested Cagalli. The two of them burst out laughing at the prospect.

When their laughter died away, a companionable silence took its place as they gazed at the scenery outside of Reverend’s Malchio’s. Subconsciously, Kira realised that their postures were a mirror image of each others’: Where Cagalli’s right hand propped her face up and her left rested on the railing, Kira’s left was under his chin and his right draped across the same railing.

That wasn’t really occupying his mind, though. Mostly, it was the fact that they were twins and will never have a future together. It made Kira wistful as he gazed at Cagalli out of the corner of his eye, remembering their conversations aboard the Archangel.

I love her, he thought to himself. I know I can’t. Even if I die, I’ll still want to be with her. But this is too much to ask for. I don’t even know if she feels the same way!

If I tell her, and if she hates me… Kira winced at the thought of it. I’ll never be able to take it. It might be better for both of us if we leave it here.

“What’re you staring at? Do I have something on my face?” snapped Cagalli, effectively bringing Kira back to reality. He hadn’t realised that his head had turned so that he really was staring.

It was her outbursts that always put me in a good mood, recalled Kira. “Nothing. I was just thinking about Onogoro,” he lied.

Cagalli seemed to believe that. Neither of them knew that both had been thinking about the same thing. Cagalli had to constantly and brutally remind herself that she had Athrun, that Kira had Lacus, and that they were twins. Still, she couldn’t stop herself thinking about it. If her father never told her about it, would Kira have been the one who had drove her here and held her hand as they entered the church? Would Kira be the one to take her back to the Parliament House later?

“I’m a little worried,” she confessed, trying to distract herself. “I don’t know whether I can live up to my father’s and the people’s expectations. I’m worried that they won’t take too kindly to my decisions after all that has happened.”

Hoping that Cagalli wouldn’t take it the wrong way and half wishing she would, Kira removed his hand from under his chin and patted hers gently. “Don’t worry about it. The people all adore you as their princess, after all. And you know that we’ll back you up if you ever need it.”

“Thanks,” she said, but it was an automatic reply. Kira assumed that her mind was back on the issue, and he wished she could feel how much he wanted to help her. But then, she’d know how I feel for her, wouldn’t she? He asked himself bitterly. If only we weren’t related…

The sound of footsteps alerted him to Athrun’s approach. He quickly pulled his hand back. His best friend wasn’t really the jealous or hot-headed type, and would never misinterpret it, but the sight of him made Kira feel ashamed, as though he had done something wrong.

Athrun placed his hand on Cagalli’s shoulder and said gently, “We’ve got to go if you ever want to finish the pile of work by today. Oh, and by the way, Kira, Lacus needs you. Something about the kids ‘cheating’ at hide-and-seek, I reckon.” He jerked his thumb over his shoulder, indicating that Lacus was somewhere inside.

“Yeah, we’ve really got to go. Sorry, Kira. Help us tell Lacus and the Reverend goodbye for us, will you? I mean, I’d do it myself, but I’m running late.” She looked at Kira apologetically. “Bye now.” Athrun and Cagalli turned to leave.

Kira watched Cagalli’s retreating back wistfully, knowing that he was letting his last chance of ever letting her know his true feelings slip by. Cagalli… I know I can’t love you, but that doesn’t mean I’ll ever stop…

His hand tightened on the railing almost convulsively. He could feel the tears Cagalli’s presence always held back lying in wait as he acknowledged the word that weighed down on his heart like a hundred-ton rock.

… sister.

A/N: I think I’m gonna choke to death. A bit of a sad ending, and that isn’t something I usually do. This is the first time writing something so contemplative, and it’s a miracle I didn’t die while writing. I’ll have to thank janusfrost and Itwasonlyakiss from YouTube for inspiring this, because if I didn’t watch their videos, I’d have never taken my ideas on this pairing further. If you liked this, leave a review, and if you didn’t, leave one anyway so I can improve. That includes better ideas for the title, because my mind was just stuck and I couldn't think of anything better. Thank you!