Hey, here's the next chapter! Sorry it took so long! Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! It means a lot! Thanks!! Hope you enjoy this!! Please let me know what you think!!

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I'm Fine

Josh groaned at the loud ringing echoing around the bathroom. He screwed his eyes shut, trying to ease the pain that was shooting through his head. His left hand blindly searched out for his cell phone. He put it to his ear, resting the back of his neck on the edge of the bath.

“Yeah?” He mumbled his answer.

“Josh?”

“Yeah?” He repeated.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.”

“Josh?”

He groaned again. “Leo, it's like...I dunno...Early.”

There was a pause on the line before Leo spoke again. “It's almost 11am.”

His eyes opened and he sat up way too quickly, causing his stomach to turn.

“Josh?” Leo questioned, when he heard him moan.

“I'm fine.” He leaned his head back again. “I Just shouldn't make sudden movements.”

“Right...” Leo said slowly before moving on. “So, you over slept?”

“Yeah...” He mumbled, deciding he didn't need to inform Leo that he spent half the night throwing up and the other half asleep against the bath. “The briefing is at one o'clock?”

“If you don't feel up to it...”

“I'll just grab a shower and I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“Josh...”

“Leo, I'll be fine.” He scrambled to his feet, leaning heavily against the sink.

“Right, if you say so,” Leo replied, doubtfully. “Get here for about 12:30, and we'll go over what you're going to say...So, that gives you an hour and a half to get ready.”

“I'll be okay once I've had a shower.” Josh looked into the mirror and tried not to grimace at his appearance.

“You’ve got some special healing water being pumped into your apartment now?” Leo questioned, sarcastically.

“Donna had it installed,” Josh shot back.

“Whatever.” Leo rolled his eyes. “Get a shower and try and eat some food before you get here.”

“Yeah, I'll work on that,” Josh replied. Even the thought of food made him feel sick.

“You've got an hour and 20 minutes.”

“Okay, I'm going,” Josh, told him. “Leo?”

“Yeah?”

“How's Sam doing?”

“Toby and him were locked up all night working on a statement.” Leo replied. “I hear that you think that it should be read by C.J and not the President.”

“You know it has to.”

“Yeah.”

“But Sam's doing better?”

“There was a lot of shouting coming from Toby's office,” Leo answered. “So, that's a good sign.”

“Yeah...”

“I'll see you when you get here.”

Josh hung up the phone, leaning both his hands onto the sink and sighed loudly. He looked ill...he didn't look like a man who would be able to give good advice to the President of the United States. If he could see that by looking in a mirror, then surely the Press and everyone else watching will be able to as well.

He closed his eyes, trying to get the image of himself out of his head. He wasn't going to let this beat him. He was going to continue to fight this. He had assured the President and Leo that he was strong enough for this and he wasn't going to let them down.

He pushed himself away from the sink and turned on the shower. He was going to show everyone that he could do this.

XxXxX

Donna placed a cup of coffee down in front of Sam, causing him to look up. He stared down at the cup for a moment before back up at Donna.

“Why are you bringing me coffee?” He asked, suspiciously.

“I wanted to do something nice.” She sat down opposite him.

“I thought you didn't bring coffee...”

“I don't bring Josh coffee,” she replied.

“Right...” He picked up the cup and took a sip. “Well, thanks.”

She was quiet for a moment. “How are you doing?”

“Me?”

“Yeah.”

“I'm tired, but then I didn't get home until late last night,” he answered. “But other then that...”

“You feeling better about the whole thing with Josh?”

Sam stared at her. “He has cancer, Donna.”

“I know...”

“Then why would I feel better?”

“I just...I meant...” She sighed. “You've been acting a little crazy.”

“Hey...”

“Josh is counting on you.”

“And I'm trying to look out for him.”

“You don't need to, Sam.”

“What?”

“He's got the First Lady making sure he's getting the best medical treatment... he's got his Mom telling what he should and shouldn't eat... he's got the President making sure he's listening to both of them and his doctors...”

“Donna...”

“He's already got people looking out for him, Sam,” she stated. “What he needs is for you to be his friend.”

“I'm trying!” Sam insisted. “But I'm not like Josh, Toby or Leo...I actually believe that there's more important things in life then politics!”

“And you think that Josh doesn't?” She questioned. “Or do you think that Toby isn't feeling guilty every time he has to turn the conversation back to work?”

“Donna...”

“This is the man who wanted to throw out the Bill of Rights after the shooting,” Donna continued, refusing to let him cut her off. “And Leo...are you forgetting what kind of man he is?”

Sam stared at her, wordlessly.

“God, Sam... He saved him after the shooting and I know it wasn't just him, but it was Leo that got through to him in the end,” she stated. “And from what I've heard, it was Leo who got through to him this time as well..”

“I know Donna...”

“He's been the father that Josh has needed...he wouldn't do anything to hurt him...No one here would.”

Sam sighed and rubbed his eyes. “I know.”

Donna reached over and placed her hand over his. “He's counting on you to be there for him, not to look out for him.”

“How do I be there for him?” He whispered. “I've had a good life...I've never really lost anyone I'm close to before...I nearly did at Rosslyn but that's it.”

“Just do what you did then,” Donna said. “That's what he wants...That's what he needs...He needs you there to break the rules that I and everyone else set for him.”

Sam smiled briefly, thinking back to when Josh was trapped in his apartment and he used to sneak over there with a takeaway and information on what was happening at work.

“He doesn't need you to look out for him because I think he's actually trying to look out for you,” she claimed again. “But he does need you to be there.”

“Did he tell you that?”

“No, he didn't need to...This is Josh, I probably know more about what's going on in his head then what's going on in my own.” She smiled but then it faded slowly. “The thing is, Sam... He's scared and he's handling this the only way he knows how...”

He looked at her curiously. “And how's that?”

“By making sure everyone he cares about is okay.”

“So, in other words...I should stop acting like this is happening to me and start getting on with what needs to be done.”

Donna smiled widely. “So, you were paying attention.”

He returned the smile. “Thanks, Donna.”

“No problem...I should get back to the office.” She stood up. “Josh will be here soon and he'll probably freak if there's no one around.”

“Hey Donna?”

“Yeah?”

“How are you doing?” He asked. “With all of this...Are you okay?”

She paused, thinking about her answer before speaking. “He's one of the strongest people I know... I believe in him...Everything is going to be fine.”

“Yeah.” He agreed softly, watching as she turned and left the room.

XxXxX

“I want to talk to the press.”

“Mr President...”

“The American people should know I'm supporting him...”

“They will know, Sir,” Leo tried to assure him. “It'll just be C.J telling them.”

“It should be me,” he insisted, turning to face the window. “As the President...”

“As the President, you'd offer your support to anyone who's suffering from an illness,” Leo finished off. “But if you personally did it, then you'd be doing more briefings then actually running the country.”

He turned back around and looked at him. “This isn't just anyone...This is Josh.”

“I know, Sir,” Leo said, quietly. “But even so, we can’t make this into a story.”

“Leo...”

“He's going to continue working... There are going to be people who will say he's not up to the job,” Leo continued. “He's going to have a hard enough time, trying to prove them wrong...”

“Even more reason for me to publicly give him my support.”

“Even more reason not to make this into a big deal.”

Jed turned away again, deep in thought. The politician in him knew that Leo was right but the Father in him, disagreed.

“Sir, this is your Deputy Chief of Staff's idea,” Leo spoke after a few seconds. “I say we trust him.”

Jed nodded slowly. “Tell Sam and Toby that the statement they written will be fine.”

“Yes, Sir,” Leo replied, moving towards his door. “Thank you, Mr President.”

Jed continued to stare out of the window as he was left alone in his own thoughts.

XxXxX

“Right, has anyone got anything to add?” Leo asked, the senior staff once they had discussed what Josh was going to say.

“Has the President decided who is going to read his statement?” Sam asked.

“C.J's going to.” Leo answered.

“Good.” Toby stood up. “I think that's everything.”

“Yeah, after C.J's done with the questions, we'll all meet again and decide our next move.”

Toby glanced over at Josh, who looked like he was going throw up any minute. He wasn't sure whether it was because of the cancer or because he was nervous.

“Let's get this show going then,” he let out a loud sigh, as he walked towards the door. Slapping Josh on the shoulder as he passed him, hoping it would be enough to reassure him that they were all there for him.

“I'll sit with Donna.” Sam stood up, glancing towards Josh. “And try and get a sneak preview of the new set of rules she's drafting up.”

Josh smiled slightly at Sam's attempt to lighten the mood.

“Remember to stay away from any questions about the President's smoking habits and if you even mention the words 'secret plan'...well, I'll have you pinned down to the floor, faster then you can say inflation,” C.J warned him, causing both him and Leo to laugh lightly. “Seriously though, I'll be right there beside you...If you need anything... I'll be there.”

“I know.” Josh said softly. “Thanks, C.J.”

“No problem, Mi Amour.”

Leo waited until the door closed behind C.J before turning his attention to Josh.

“So, you ready for this?”

“Not really but it'll fine.”

“We can get C.J to read both statements...It's not a problem.”

“I know, Leo, but he should do this.” Josh cut him off.

“You’ve told everyone that needs to know?” Leo asked, after a few seconds of silence.

“My Mom spoke to a few close family friends,” he answered. “I didn't want too many people to know...I didn't want it to get out to the press before today.”

“I spoke to Mallory...” He informed him. “She sends her love and wants you to know you can call her any time.”

Josh smiled slightly and looked down at his hands. “What about everyone else...the rest of the staff? Do they know yet?”

“Toby and C.J spoke to everyone who needed to know this morning,” he replied. “The President and I met with the Vice President last night.”

“Yeah, I bet he was beginning to wonder why we aren't denying these rumours about me going to work for him.”

“I think he was hoping it was true.”

“Yeah, he's probably not now.”

“He seemed genuinely concerned about you.”

“Yeah...Yeah, I know...He's a good man really.” He sighed rubbing his eyes. “I should probably get to the Press room.”

“Okay.”

Josh hesitated before pushing himself to his feet and walking towards the door.

“Joshua?”

He stopped and slowly turned back to look at his boss. In all the years, he had known Leo; he had never called him Joshua. It was always Josh or Kid... never Joshua.

“I'm so proud of what you're about to do...” He said softly. “I'm so proud of you.”

“Thank you.” He barely whispered.

“Your Dad would be proud too.”

Tears started to fill his eyes and he tried to fight them away but one managed to escape and roll down his cheek.

“I just wanted you to know that,” Leo added.

Josh nodded slightly, turning on his heels and walking out of the office. He took a deep breath as he walked down the corridor. He ignored the looks of sympathy he was getting from some of the staff and didn't stop until he reached the Pressroom door.

“Josh?”

“Danny, hey...”

“You okay?” He asked. “You look a little...off?”

“I'm fine.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, you should take your seat...it'll be starting soon.”

“You're not going in there, are you?” Danny joked. “Not after last time.”

Josh forced a small smile. “This will be different.”

“You sure you're okay?”

“Yeah,” Josh answered, watching as the reporters inside the room talked and moved around the room.

Danny looked at him curiously. “You're making an announcement, aren't you?”

“Danny...”

“Is it about Hoynes?” He questioned. “Because I've got to say...”

“It's not,” Josh cut him off as Carol squeezed past them and told everyone that the briefing would be starting in two minutes.

“But it's something big though, right?”

Josh glanced at him before looking back into the room. “Take your seat, Danny... you're not going to want to miss this.”

Danny stayed where he was for a few seconds but when Josh refused to say any more or look at him, he moved fully into the room.

“What did Fish Boy want?” C.J asked, as she joined Josh.

“Nothing,” he replied. “Just you know...”

“Did you tell him anything?”

“What? No...just... I know he's a reporter and all but...I've known him a long time.” He sighed. “He's a friend.”

“I know,” C.J whispered, reaching down and squeezing his hand reassuringly.

“You should get out there,” he told her. “Get this thing over and done with.”

“Yeah okay.”

He watched as she walked to the podium and the room instantly fell silent.

“Good Afternoon, everyone...” She looked down at the piece of paper in front of her before looking back up to her audience. “Before we start today's briefing...Deputy Chief of Staff Joshua Lyman would like to make a statement...”

Josh took another deep breath and tried to stop his hands from shaking as he made his way to replace C.J at the podium.

“I'll be right here,” she whispered in his ear, as he walked past her as she moved to the side.

He gripped onto the podium tightly and looked around the room. They all stared back at him curiously and he heard some whispering. His eyes locked with Danny's for a few seconds before he looked away. He felt a little light headed and silently prayed that he didn't throw up all over the front row.

“Last Saturday, I was diagnosed with Leukaemia...” He started, but didn't pause. He knew if he did, he'd probably wouldn't be able to finish. “I received my first round of chemotherapy on Tuesday and was realised from hospital on Wednesday...I'll continue to go and receive treatment for a couple of hours, once a week.”

A few reporters shot their hands in the air. He couldn't remember any of their names so he pointed to a guy sat near the back. “Yeah?”

“Can you tell us anything more about the Leukaemia?”

“It's acute Leukaemia which means, it's fast processing,” he informed them and turned to someone else. “Yes?”

“What does your doctor think the outcome will be?”

Josh stared at her for a few seconds before answering. “Well, I just finished my first lot of treatment two days ago so unfortunately at the moment, it's too early to tell... Danny?”

“How are you?” He questioned, although it was more out of concern then getting a quote for his paper.

“I have a wonderful family, good friends and I work alongside some amazing people who are all supporting and helping me...Considering the circumstances, I'm very lucky,” he answered a little too honestly then he probably should have, so he quickly turned to someone else. “Katie?”

“Will you continue working as Deputy Chief of Staff or will President Bartlet hire someone to cover for you?”

“I will continue to do my job to the best of my ability, but there will be times when I won't be able to and President Bartlet has asked C.J Cregg to cover for me during those times.”

“Do you think it's a good idea for someone receiving medical treatment to advise the President?” Someone called out.

“Like I said, I'll continue doing my job and I promise not to let this effect my work but the President and the rest of the administration has complete faith in C.J Cregg to do so when I'm unavailable.”

There where a few more questions shouted out but Josh held up his hand to stop them. “Sorry, that's all I have for you.”

He quickly walked past C.J and towards the exit. He didn't see Toby stood watching and continued down the corridor. He could hear C.J reading out the statement from the President before he pushed open the door to the men's' room. He just managed to reach the toilet before he was sick. He heard the door open and close but he didn't care. After a minute, when he was sure he had finished, he turned and sat on the floor, his eyes shut.

“Can I get you anything?”

He opened his eyes and looked up at Toby.

“I messed up.”

“You didn't...”

“At the end...I made it seem like I was taking a vacation.”

“It was fine.”

He leaned his back against the wall. “I promised them I could handle this...”

“Josh...”

“You ever get the feeling, you've lied to millions of people?”

“You didn't...” Toby assured him, reaching down, grabbing hold of Josh's hand and pulled him to his feet. “I wouldn't have let you.”

“Toby...”

“We've got you covered on this, okay... We’ve got your back.”

“Okay...” Josh replied, letting out a breath he didn't even realise he was holding.

“Right, let’s go and watch the end of the briefing.” Toby walked out of the bathroom with Josh following. They stopped behind the window at the back of the Pressroom just as C.J was finishing off.

“...Medical treatment for cancer suffers has come a long way over the years... President Bartlet and his family are praying for an easy and quick recovery for Josh Lyman...He also prays for the millions of people who have been effected by cancer in the past, the present and the future...” She stopped, looking around the room. “Okay, who's got a questions?”

TBC

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