Pure curiosity. My mind is always thinking of these sorts of dilemmas and problems that would arise when these issues could arise. Just experimenting. I have never written about this sort of thing before, lol, but I’m messed up, so I already know that. Not to mention that at one point during this year, we somehow got onto the topic of synchronized periods… just don’t even ask, okay? They can actually happen if you stay around with enough girls at the same time.

Warning: Rated T for language. (Venting my rage out with the cycle system that girls always seemed to suffer from every month.)

The Problem With Panties

Being a werewolf is great and all. Seriously, what could be more thrilling than going out and running as fast as sound, feeling the swelling in your gut about how right being one with the wild was.

Speed, rapid healing, the constant high body heat, the high of life itself. Being able to hunt your mortal, or immortal, I should say is great. There are a lot of pros…but also a lot of cons. Or this one really bad con, which makes living with any werewolf so embarrassing. The telepathic link.

Especially when you’re the only she-wolf in the group. So could you feel Leah’s pain when she is experiencing that time of month and have no choice but to reveal it to everybody else in the pack- even your incredibly sexy ex-boyfriend. Embarrassing doesn’t even begin to cover the emotion in which Leah can describe one of the worst times in her life.

It doesn’t exactly help that she was trying to hide her monthly visit from Mother Nature when everyone has a heightened sense of smell. One let down of many. And then there is the whole sharing your thoughts while you’re in wolf mode.

You think she could avoid it now, seeing as there were hardly any vampires around for them to do border patrols…but no. Sam went out of his way to make her day worse- unintentionally of course, or so he says.

And it wouldn’t have been so bad as to just carry out her day, trying to ignore the fact that she was having feminine hygiene issues around every corner. It was just that the boys made a big commotion about it that made it like a living hell.

“Ew!” Embry would cry, as Paul would run away. Quil would be following him, trying to get away from the thoughts swarming from everyone else, not that it would help so much in that plan, seeing as they could still hear each other from far distances.

Jacob, well, he would groan and go bury his head into the ground, suffering the embarrassing memories and gross realizations. (Hey, if he was trying so desperately to win Bella over, he was going to have to remember these things.) And Sam would try and clear his head before he too ran away from the menstruating and severely pissed female.

“Honestly! If it’s that bad just change back! For goodness sakes!” she would cry out to them, snarling.

“Or you could turn back into human form and then just go away…far away,” Embry would say, trying to appeal to the rest of the pack’s desires. Not only did the she-wolf suffer, the boys did too with her irritable attitude. And the funny thing was, even though they could read her mind, they couldn’t understand the reason she was being so bitchy around them was because of them. Oh well. Some boys just never learned.

“JUST SHUT UP EMBRY! YOU TRY BEING A GIRL WITH A STUPID PACK OF IMMATURE BOYS THAT SEEM TO MAKE A BIG DEAL OUT OF SOMETHING SO SMALL!” she screeched in her mind, severely pissed.

If she weren’t in her full werewolf mode already, she would have been then, shaking from the anger. When she was like this, the rest of the pack (Sam especially) would try and calm her down. If she didn’t, it could harm her skeleton frame and tissues.

In the event that they did not succeed so much on that approach, they would resort to Plan B: Run away. Run very far away.

It could even be days later before she could even calm down enough to morph back into a human. But by that time, the men would be off doing something that did not require looking at her, like busying themselves with various chores. Emily, her cousin would make her grilled chicken and a giant feast just for her seething cousin and would eventually accomplish the task of bringing her back down to earth. Somehow, after the maelstrom of emotions that Leah suffered, Emily always managed to get her laughing again, even if the woman managed in stealing the love of her life and living peacefully with him…

And then began the whole cycle of PMSing over again.

Yes…indeed it was a time of darkness as Leah continued to have her time of month still.

And boy…did the pack ever know it. Being a werewolf had it quirks.

Super speed, amazing balance, enhanced senses; that rush that went through you as you ran at the speed of light. Being able to come to the rescue and heal at an amazing pace.

Really, it was great. All the werewolves thought so.

But they feared and hated being creatures of the Quileute reservation at the same time. Because whenever that time of month came, they could not escape the wrath of Leah Clearwater.

The End.

Okay, so this was very short. But as I said, pure curiosity and I just wanted to put it up cause I was out of my mind with boredom. Besides, it counts down one of the many…uh-interesting story lines that I had written out on my notebook.

Hope it was okay! Not particularly funny, but just exploring the possibilities. And I haven’t read New Moon and/or Eclipse in a while so don’t hesitate to correct me on anything. I can fix it up. Just make sure you are positive. :D

Yours truly,

Freak a Geek