Like the previous A/N disclaimer said, I do not own Invader Zim okay? Sorry to any loyal fans who wanted the next chapter for the late update; I know there is no excuse for it. Anyway a lot has happened since I last updated this wonderful story called Taboo. I have gotten engaged and moved to a new state. I will be including some more DATR action in the future chapters and I will write some more DATR stories here soon. Any ideas, you let me know and I will write a DATR with it. God knows there needs to be more of them.

Well this maybe my longest A/N ever. On with the fic!

Dib had found a batch of hay in the loft to try and hide in until the weather improved or he felt better, whichever happened to come first. I think the weather may improve before I get rid of this damned fever Dib thought as he looked out the barn window and this weather looks to never improve. He knew that he was pressing his luck already by resting in the barn and possibly leaving a trail to him. Leaving that trail meant that the search crew after him could find him with little to no trouble at all. He had to get back into the woods as soon as possible and just play it safe; maybe he could find an old campground or shed in that area that he could hide in that was under the Irken’s radar. Maybe he could live as a mountain man; God knows a mountain man doesn’t know 1808 from 2008. A voice in Dib’s head said as he curled up to sleep. They are going to find you…and you know it… another voice in Dib’s head said then he curled up with some hay as he felt his eyes grow heavy and his fever start to increase. He made a pillow out of some hay and zipped up his trench coat for warmth.

“He’s in there men!” Uto said walking a path to the barn while he was followed by an angry Larkz.

“That’s MY line! This is MY assignment from Lady Tak! AND those are MY troops you are commanding!” Larkz yelled. He groaned in disgust as he stepped from mud puddle to mud puddle.

Uto sighed and stopped. “Well it was ME Lady Tak asked to help you. And she gave ME permission to take command if I felt YOU weren’t doing a good enough job. So there.” Uto said with a smirk. “Perhaps Lady Tak does not think you are a good enough commander. It’s a real shame that she thinks a mere Planetary Scout is better than a mighty Irken Military Police Chief”

Larkz scowled and grabbed his gun in his hands. Someday Uto you will get yours and when you do I will be laughing my ass off at you. He turned the knob to start up the gun and imagined Uto being at the receiving end of the blast. He then smiled to himself and kissed his gun. “My precious baby, Daddy will never let any harm fall on you.”

Uto heard the kiss and paused and turned around. “What did you say?”

“Nothing idiot.” Larkz scowled.

“I distinctly heard you say, ‘My precious baby, Daddy will never let any harm fall on you.’ I have excellent hearing, you know, Larkz. You know that all Planetary Scouts do. Do not try to lie to me about what you said.

“Fine!” Larkz yelled. “I did say that! Are you happy now?” Larkz said stomping his foot.

“Well why?” Uto asked as calm as can be.

“Why what?” Larkz replied.

“Why did you say that?” Uto repeated. “As I am sure you know, I have to write reports to Lady Tak and she wants the most detail she can get.” He then wrote down Larkz’s quote in a notepad. “I can call this ‘obstruction and/or delay of capture’” Uto wrote on “’Insubordination’… the list goes on Larkz. I am sure you do not want Lady Tak angry at you again.”

“Fine! I was imagining blowing your head off with my laser gun.” Larkz said.

“See now that wasn’t so hard. You will only get a few notes now for wanting to off your commanding officer.” Uto said.

“COMMANDING OFFICER?!!!! You got to be kidding me!” Larkz said.

“Lady Tak called not too long ago. She relieved you of duty and gave me your job.” Uto said as he looked at some more footprints that were left on the ground.

“WHAT?!!!?” Larkz said.

“She said something about you being incompetent, giving false reports, something like that. Basically she said she needed someone who can produce results that were accurate than someone who would give up after seeing Dib Membrane’s hair. Now your brute force will be useful in taking Dib in, so come along, no need for it to go to waste.” Uto said as he kept walking and following the footsteps. Larkz grumbled following along. He stroked his gun just hoping for the chance to kill Uto and prove to Lady Tak that he was worthwhile and so she would make him head guard and forgive his mistake. While he knew that Tak was in charge, he also wanted to find something to use against her so the Tallest would give him her job and kick her aside. If Zim can go from an Invader who destroyed Irk to a governor, then I surely can take Tak’s spot. No one puts Larkz in a corner.

“Come on Larkz! This is the last time I want to tell you! Dib Membrane is in that barn and you’re just standing there! Come on!” Uto said.

Larkz sighed and charged his weapon and followed Uto.

“Paste suits on men!” Uto said.

“Why?” Larkz asked looking at the sky. “It’s just cloudy. Rain isn’t in the forecast. Is it?”

“I studied this planet enough and I can tell when the rains will fall.” Uto said. “Now you get that fucking paste suit on. Or not. I really don’t care. Actually if I didn’t need you, I’d order your paste suit OFF! But what do I know? I was only trained to find every clue about an enemy planet to use for our own benefit.”

The troops moved along trying to get to the barn that Dib’s footprints led up to. They moved along as quietly as they could as to not wake up the surrounding farmers. They knew areas like this had a lot of people who could and would stir up a rebellion. The story of the group of Grays getting shot at then the family who shot at them calling the local Sheriff was still fresh in their minds. This story was why Tak ordered a strict inspection on everything that crosses the Kentucky border. She knew that Dib would hide in a rural area and if he knew that story, which as the paranormal investigator he was that he most likely would, he would hunt the family down and obtain their help. However Uto knew unless Dib got a plane or some sort of other aircraft, he wasn’t going to be getting their help. Dib was walking along the byways and in the woods, slowing him up. Uto did know of some old farms near a city called Scranton in the state of Pennsylvania and he deducted by the time had elapsed from his escape; Scranton was the farthest he would go. As a fugitive, on foot was the only way he could go.

Uto looked at the muddy footprints and charged his laser gun. Miyuki, I hope thank thee for the abundance that I am about to receive Uto prayed in his mind. He pulled out a special donut he was given when Tak first commissioned him leader. “This way men! Dib is so close I can smell his fear!”

“THAT’S MY LINE!” Larkz yelled running after Uto. Uto turned around and grabbed Larkz’s wrist and pulled them face to face.

“I need you to catch Dib Membrane and bring him to me. Unless you want to be Demoted, you’ll do this. Zim may be governor but Tak is in an essence the Queen. Now are you going to listen to me and capture Dib or am I going to have your head?!!!!!!?” Uto whispered.

“Fine!!!!” Larkz said as he charged his laser gun and walked into the barn. He motioned for the rest of the resonance squad for backup.

Dib slept on the hay to try and relieve is fever but it was to little avail. “There used to be farm animals here not too long before the Irkens conquered.” He whispered as he took his hands and splashed his face with cool, stale water which smelled like hay was dipped in it by a horse “Bleeeeffffffhghhtt……better than nothing….” He said as he patted some on his head. Then he cupped his hands and took a drink. “Much better.” He said as he stared back to the hay loft. Curling back up in his bed of hay, he rummaged through his pockets where he found an old notepad from when Tak first came to Earth. Taped in there was a picture they had taken in a photo booth. She was in her human disguise and smiling. In the next photo they were pulling the sides of their mouths and sticking their tongues out in a teasing manner. The next one they were having a hearty laugh. The final one they were smiling again but Tak had a mischievous grin. Dib looked closer and noticed her doing the classic bunny ears on his head. He looked around and imagined if Tak was there.

“I betcha she’d look beautiful now. I don’t know what it is but she’s stolen my heart.” Dib whispered holding the old photograph close.

Why do you love the one who wants your head? A voice in his head said. Despite this Dib knew in his heart that it was for Tak and no one else.

Meanwhile Uto and Larkz and their army of Irkens were approaching the barn. Uto and Larkz looked around at the barn for a place they could sneak in and capture Dib. Uto looked from the barn to Larkz and back sighing. “Larkz, I must admit, I know a lot about Earth’s terrain and climate but people and Earth-monkey made structures I do not. What do you know?” Uto asked of Larkz.

“Well from the farmer I tortured and coaxed information from,” Larkz said with an overzealous grin, “They feed and give those horse monsters and dirty cow monsters water in troughs. I think Dib may have drunk from it before we got here. Humans need water to survive. Speaking of which, I’m thirsty.” He pulled out a bottle of peroxide and drank it. “Pitiful humans. They will never know the tasty bliss of a bottle of hot peroxide to refresh them. Hell, it kills them!” Larkz laughed.

They say the exact thing about us and ice water dumbass. Uto thought then spoke up. “So where do you think he is?” Uto looked around a pointed to the ladder leading into the hayloft.

“I was thinking the same thing you piece of crap.” Larkz said. “He needs rest. May I ask if you have ever been to Governor Zim’s base?”

“No, I honestly cannot say I have.” Uto replied ignoring Larkz’s insults.

“Well he has a bed in there for his harlot.” Larkz said.

“Lady Gaz?” Uto asked.

“Yeah. She’s the only human worth our time. Well anyway, that is for her. She needs sleep until we can get her a PAK operation. Also Governor Zim says taking her there is better too. Long shit short, humans like soft and sleep better on soft. I believe Dib is in they hay. Resting.” Larkz said.

Dib was fast asleep dreaming of Tak. “Dib…Dib…Dib…Dib…” he heard in his dream as a vision of Tak and a soft voice pushed him awake. “Hmmmmmmmph?” He asked. “Tak?”

“Sorry I am not Lady Tak.” Larkz said with an evil grin.” I am Larkz. I am Captain Larkz of the Earth Brigade of the Elite Irken Army. You my good filthy human sir are under arrest.”

“Me?” Dib whimpered.

“Yes you. Lady Tak asked for you specifically. Sent the best squad under the best searching scout in her army. Miyuki! I am so going to be Promoted!” Uto smiled. “Larkz, do me a favor and stop him from running.”

“With pleasure sir.” Larkz said as he crept closer getting ready to use a sleeping pressure point on Dib. “May I try this sir?” Larkz asked with sarcastic concern. Whether or not Uto agreed, he was going to use the prison bubble.

“Do it. Not like I am going to stop your only good idea.” Uto sighed.

“GOOD!” Larkz smiled as he fired the ray capturing Dib. “Make the call.”

(Page break to Tak’s Headquarters)

“So your men have him?” Red asked over the long distance communication device.

“Almost. Last report Uto gave, they were right on top of him.” Tak saluted. “My Tallest, the Membranes will not be a bother to you anymore.”

“They had better be or Zim will have this planet and control of you.” Red said. “Miyuki knows we can use this one the most and I WILL NOT HAVE THIS PLANET COME UNDER REBELLION. Do you understand me Tak? Am I making my self clear?”

“Crystal.” Tak said.

“Good. End communication.” Red said as the screen went black.

“Curse you Dib! You’re on my mind and Red will have my head if I don’t capture you!” Tak screamed as she shoved her desk clear. “I WILL NOT LOSE WHAT I HAVE BECAUSE OF THAT SHITASS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

“INCOMING TRASMISSON!” Her messenger called

“What is it?” She asked with the frazzled tone she had from her call from the Tallest.

“Yep.” Uto said. “We got him. Lady Tak we got Dib Membrane!”

Tak smiled at the news. She was still over Zim. “I knew you could do it. Uto, Larkz, you are now partners as well as Major Generals.” In the background a “Shitdamnfuck! I still gotta work with that cocksucking shiteating shitass Uto!’ from Larkz was heard. “Larkz, don’t think I forgot. Anyway I want you to first bring him to me and that is an order.”

“Yes Mi Lady!” Uto said saluting.

Tak hung up and turned to her stained glass window staring out it. “Dib you are mine.”

Well how was that? Dib captured and Tak ready for torture. Remember to read (well you just did) and review

Otherrealmwriter

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