Anna sighed as she slammed the car door and dropped the keys into her coat pocket

Anna sighed as she slammed the car door and dropped the keys into her coat pocket. The trip back from the airport had been a lonely one. Trista had given her her car and the apartment for the few months that were left on the lease. She’d left some of her old clothes and stocked the fridge with food and paid the bills in advance. Anna couldn’t believe it. No one did this, not even her family. And they were in the mafia. As she heard it, the mafia took care of their own. She opened the door to the apartment complex and click clacked up the steps in her patent leather pumps. The door to what she supposed was now her apartment was unlocked and she realized that she and Trista must have forgotten to lock it in their rush to get out. They were, as any true young Bostonian women or women in general would be, in a bit of a rush as they walked out the door, but only a bit of a rush and Anna mentally kicked herself for such a stupid accident. But she was happy to find as she entered, the apartment looked to be intact.

She dropped her coat on the chair by the door as Trista had done so many times before, wandered into the kitchen, and straight to the freezer to pull out a pint of chocolate denial. With her ice cream and the spoon she grabbed from the drawer to the right of the refrigerator, she made camp on the couch, where she could be found for the next two weeks without fail.

She hadn't gone. Of course, she hadn't gone. How could she have? A fugitive from her own family, living on borrowed... everything? So now she spent her days sulking and waiting for Trista to call. The older woman had, of course, promised to do this firstly because in the short time they'd lived together, Trista and Anna had become quite close, and secondly because if Anna was adamant about not accompanying Trista, she was even more adamant about living the trip vicariously through her, especially when it came to the finding of the MacManus brothers. Anna had far from given up on Murphy. She had, after all, exiled herself from her family for him, an unthinkable deed for a girl like her. Indeed, a year ago she never would have imagined her life could be what it had become. But she had chosen its course, and she did not regret it.

Regrets were useless anyways. She had the present, little as it was. She had her health and her relative freedom, but she began to wonder if she’d really gone through all of -- everything -- to sit in an apartment all day doing crossword puzzles. And the answer was no. She’d gone through all of that for Murphy, hadn’t she? But now he was gone and the likelihood was he wasn’t coming back. And if she ever wanted to see him again she was going to have to get there on her own. And it occurred to her that if she wanted to continue living in this apartment and -- well, living -- she’d have to do that on her own too. So it was a fortnight after she’d dropped Trista off a the airport that she decided to go out.

There were butterflies in her stomach, but she walked with a purpose out the door -- even though she had no idea where she was going. Her father hadn’t come after her. And he surely could have found her if he’d tried. It was a good sign, just enough of a good sign to get her out the door but not enough of a good sign to quell her fears completely. She was wearing Trista’s skinny jeans and a blouse that was only slightly too big for her, but which was mostly hidden anyways under a trench. She felt pretty good about herself and that was on purpose. She needed the extra spring in her step to keep her going. She’d had Trista cut her hair before leaving, imagining it was what she’d have to do if she were in witness protection. Now her smile widened as her heals clicked on the sidewalk and her bob bounced with each step. She inhaled deeply. Somehow fresh air wasn’t quite as fresh coming through open windows.

Anna looked around and suddenly she couldn’t breathe. There was the building her uncle lived in. Down the street was her cousin’s fiancée’s house. How had she gotten here? How had she gotten so far? She spun around and walked in the other direction, the only idea in her head: South. South. South.

Two hours later after a subway ride and a lot of wandering, Anna marched down Bowen Street optimistically. She wondered why she hadn’t thought of Becca before. She’d thought of everything else. Staying with a friend was rather out of the question, but Becca was a little more than a friend. She was more like a sister, Anna supposed. They’d been roommates in college and senior year shared an apartment. Becca was from Oregon and had given up her comfort zone to come out east for college. So now she was paying off student loans, living in a hell-hole apartment, and loving every minute of it. Anna thought it was because Becca had made her own decisions. Her parents weren’t around to help her out, but she never asked for help from them and their being thousands of miles away had never bothered her a bit, not because she didn’t love them and miss them, but rather because she did. She’d been very close with her family and it’d been a hell of a thing for her to come all the way she did on her own. But that was the best thing about it, and Anna thought she was beginning to understand why.

First semester of freshman year, her only questions had had to do with how exactly Becca planned on making enough money to keep her afloat once she’d graduated and Becca had always responded that she didn’t know. But she’d said it with a smile and confidence and ease in her voice and Anna had always had to just furrow her pretty little eyebrows and figure she would wait and see. Somehow things always went right for Becca. Whether this was because she had some brilliant good luck or because she made it go right, Anna didn’t know, but she hoped it was because she’d made it go right. Anna thought she could do that, if she tried, but she’d never had the best of luck. And perhaps if it was something Becca did, if she made her own luck, perhaps she could teach Anna to do the same thing.

All these things rumbled through Anna’s head as she jogged up the steps and pressed the button next to Becca’s name. No answer came, so she rang again. It was a long time before Anna gave up ringing and kicked herself for her stupidity. Part of Becca’s financial plan was having a job, where she was invariably working at this time of day. Anna folded her arms and hunched over, mentally drawing inward, feeling a bit scared and rather alone. She turned her back to the door and looked down the street. If only Murphy would suddenly appear and offer to walk her home. But he wouldn’t. She was on her own. And then, with a stubborn resolution and a sigh, she sat down on the step to wait.

It was a great surprise for Becca when she came home to be greeted by lovely little Anna sitting on the steps waiting for her. But Anna wasn’t so lovely at the moment and she didn’t seem quite so little anymore either, and Becca knew immediately that she hadn’t dropped by to chat. “What’s going on?” she asked, and Anna knew no small talk was necessary.

“I ran away from home.” Becca didn’t flinch at the question or wonder at what it meant. She knew how constricting Anna’s life was, and she also knew that to her family 18 didn’t mean anything but that you could buy cigarettes. “My father’s in the mob.”

Becca turned away from Anna and opened the door. “Time to go upstairs.”

Hours later, after she had explained the entire situation, omitting nothing but Murphy’s status as a Saint, Anna asked, “So. Can you teach me?”

And Becca knew what she meant. “Well. I’ve got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that I don’t make my own luck.” Anna’s face fell. “The good news is that I don’t believe in luck.”

“So…?”

“You know how you always hated it when I was so… upbeat in college?” Anna smiled and nodded. “Well, I was just always confident that things would work out. And that’s why they did. I’m one of those crazy people who thinks that if you know in your heart this is the right path for you, you should walk down it. And since you can’t see into the future, you just have to believe that it will turn out alright. If it’s really the right thing for you, that shouldn’t be too hard. Because if it’s really the right thing for you, then everything will work out. The universe will make sure of it.”

Anna just looked at her. “Man, you are crazy.”

Anna stayed over at Becca’s that night. By the time she woke up in the morning, Becca had gone to work, but she had no doubts about what she was going to do. She and Becca had come up with a plan the night before, and the fact that Becca thought it would work made Anna believe in it like she believed in nothing else. So Anna wasted no time in getting up and getting dressed, not in her own clothes -- if you would call Trista’s hand-me-downs her clothes -- but in an outfit Becca had laid out for her. She would need it for what she was about to do.

It wasn’t a complicated plan, or hard, but it was something Anna never would have had the courage to do herself, as much as she knew it was necessary. So when she stepped out the door that morning, she stopped being Anna and started being Becca. For Becca this would be no big thing. For Becca, this would be a piece of cake. And that mantra worked for Anna. It worked all the way to the subway and all the way north. It worked all the way into the office building and all the way to the front desk. It worked all the way up the elevator to the office. And then it stopped working. It stopped working when the secretary asked her name. “Anna Della Rocco,” she said and was lead into the office.

“Anna Della Rocco,” the secretary announced, and she shut the door.

Anna sat down a the bidding of the man in the desk. “I’m here because… I need a job.”

“Well that is why most people come to a temp agency.”