|Elite Creatures Unleashed Encore!
Author: Arcanomancer PM
4 years ago i had an epic... now it returns to grace your screens with the usual degree of randomness, insanity and elite creatures squabbling like 12 year olds! Please R&R, and i hope the old keepers love it!Rated: Fiction T - English - Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 8,254 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 01-28-10 - Published: 01-06-08 - id: 3995438
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Elite Creatures Unleashed – Encore
Chapter 1: Getting back into the Groove
Yes, I decided to revive an old fave… after it disappeared 4 years ago and popularity vanished… I found the first 8 chapters of the original the other day and boy I enjoyed reading them :D So I thought I'd start the fic up again… albeit with a few changes, but with the same elite you all love and loathe
Gervaise: Can it… can we start having fun again?
I need to get you all back first…
Disclaimer: Okey, the Elite are property of whomever owns DK2 now, I hear Bullfrog did some changes a while ago so I cant be certain… I however belong to me…
Okey, after 4 years, this will be fun!
To remind you all, the difference in looks of the 13 Elite are as follows… should you have forgotten/ not played DK2: (Key: Creature Type - Name - Difference)
Goblin – Grubb – Golden Helmet, Greener Skin
Firefly – Bzzzt – Purple instead of Orange
Warlock – Almeric – Red Robes instead of purple
Salamander – Furnace – Distinct markings down his back, no other has em
Dark Elf – Zenobia – Actually has hair
Rogue – Gervaise – Blue armor instead of brown, Also has two daggers
Dark Mistress – Dominique – Purple hair instead of red
Black Knight – Kaleb – Blue Armour instead of Black
Skeleton – Bane – Skeleton looks Metallic as opposed to white
Bile Demon – Bloz – Golden Maces on his horns, Orange body instead of red
Troll – Knud – Shiny Hammer and Greener Skin
Vampire – Kessler Van Doom – Purple Robes instead of Black
Dark Angel – Zachariah – Darker Skin and Wings
Darkness filled the corridors, not a single sound anywhere save for loud clucks from the left as a figure moved down the central passageway of the dungeon, looking for signs of life…
???: Bloody hell, where is everyone?
A brief cry of pain as he tripped over a bone on the floor, and after a yell managed to find his way to the central chamber, the dungeon heart standing lifeless under the floor before the man put his hands to it and started to chant, not noticing a figure behind him suddenly spring out and tackle him to the floor.
???: What the bloody 'eck?
He span and on top of him stood a Rogue in blue leather, daggers poised and a grin on his face
???:Gervaise you idiot, it's me…
Gervaise: Irv… When did you get back? We thought you'd died…
Irvine: I did, dead men seem to come back a lot these days…
The Dungeon heart began to glow harder, the entire area gradually brightening as several imps appeared and scurried off to do their things.
Irvine: Where is everyone?
Gervaise: After your 'defeat', they took life into stride… decided to settle down and live normal un-lives…
Irvine: -Sweatdropping- How drunk are they?
Gervaise: Extremely… oh, and stay out of the Hatchery…
After the heart was working again, the pair started to explore and clean, hacking away the cobwebs and grin as a purple figure emerged from the library and held up a tube connected to a pack of volatile looking liquid on his back
???: Behold Almeric, the Flamethrower!
A voice from inside piped up
Almeric: It'll never work!
The Vampire laughed at Almeric before starting his invention and blasting the cobwebs blocking the corridor, grinning and winking at Almeric, who stood there in shock
Almeric: I'll be fucked, something you made actually works?
Irvine: You'll be fucked too if he notices he set his arse on fire…
Kessler van Doom: I didn't set my…
A quick lightning bolt to the backside had him run screaming looking for a pool of lava to douse his arse in as water would hurt him, and Almeric chuckled as they headed to the next door, but screams came from inside as a large red beast with golden maces from it's horns charged through the broken door and barricaded it up really fast
Almeric: Bloz, dinner attack you again?
The red thing turned and nodded
Bloz: That chicken is hell incarnate, speaking of that, where is the Reaper?
Irvine: Horny's off at Matalan buying himself a nice outfit, he said something about spring-wear…
Bloz turned and grinned as Kessler came back, looking none the less pleased to see his keeper, and angry at his arse's pained sensation
Kessler van Doom: Now, do we go wake the others up?
Gervaise: Leave that to me…
As they all walked off towards the Casino, bangings came from in the Hatchery, and a red eye appeared from a hole in the door
Almeric: Wake up you lazy gits…
Poking people at random in the casino was having little effect, nor was Kessler's tickling of peoples feet or Gervaises patented 'Tit-alarm', which he christened after grabbing women firmly to wake em up, but this only succeeded in getting him a slap from a drunken dark elf as the keeper giggled
Irvine: Gervaise, they still loathe you after 3 years…
Kessler van Doom: Him and his way with women…
Irvine cupped his hands and used them to amplify his voice, yelling "Free Porn!" at the top of his lungs and getting a reaction from the sleeping crew, as a bright blue armoured figure groaned and rubbed his eyes… or tried too through his helmet.
Irvine: Wake up Kaleb, we need someone for fighting skills…
Kaleb: You said something about Porn?
Irvine: There isn't any…
Kaleb: Well bugger you then!
He crashed out again, and Irvine sighed as Gervaise shook a bottle of beer next to the Knight, who instantly leapt up and grabbed it.
Kaleb: Gimme gimme gimme! You're my best mate Gervaise!
He grabbed him in a bear hug, and Gervaise winced as his bones broke. Following a quick heal, they managed to pull other people to their feet, leaving them disorientated and confused… none more so than a Dark Angel when everyone started to walk off.
Irvine: Zachariah, are you alright?
Zachariah: Where are you all going?
The Dark Elf turned and looked over her shoulder with a scowl
Zenobia: We're going to relieve ourselves…
Zachariah: Not in the bloody temple your…
But it was to late, they were all gone and the Dark Angel cussed before following, Kessler plotting once again
Kessler van Doom: Maybe if I invented something to go with that ancient toilet… perhaps a trough for men to use…
Almeric: What about the women?
Kessler van Doom: Well then can queue for the one we have like most women do!
The Vampire cheered at his idea, Almeric groaned, but smirked as a hand grabbed Kessler and shook him with a lightning charge
Almeric: Dominique, think you can lay off him for just one minute…
The Mistress sighed and dropped the Vampire to the floor, who landed in an undignified heap at her feet
Dominique: Sorry, we haven't had anything to do for aeons…
Almeric: I know, but don't worry… I feel we're gonna have fun again soon, I mean it's been 3 years and we're back in action…
Irvine: Right, everyone listen up!
No one gave him any heed, so he held up a picture of a topless lady with big breasts which did the trick
Irvine: That's better… now stop pissing into the font whilst I talk, you can do that after…
The men all groaned and turned, the Keeper grinning at this little victory and pointing to the corner
Irvine: We need to clean this place up… mops and buckets are there, each of you take a room or corridor area and do the job…
Gervaise: What are you gonna do?
Irvine: Take all the credit of course…
Zachariah: You better deal with the problem in the hatchery first…
Irvine blinked and looked at him
Kessler van Doom: The one Bloz ran from…
Almeric: You see, the chickens had a prophecy that one would arise to save them… and we laughed, but it has, and it wasn't what we were expecting…
Irvine walked towards the hatchery, the elite in tow and shook his head
Irvine: It cant be that hard!
Kaleb nodded his head and laughed
Kaleb: Yea right, even I know not to charge into there…
Irvine: Well, lets take a look!
He hurled open the door, and standing in the middle of the room was a chicken far larger than anyone in his dungeon, standing there looking maniacal with a monocle on it's face and a small black moustache above it's beak as it turned and gave a screech
Gervaise: My god, Gestapo Chickens!
Even the skeleton looked up in fear
Bane: Order of the Cluck…
Irvine slammed the door shut just as the first wave of hens tried to beak him, but shook his head and turned to the others
Irvine: How longs this Cluck up been here?
Gervaise: Good few months, why?
Zachariah: He terroises us whilst we sleep… he knows all…
Irvine: Yea right… first order of business before we clean up… How do we take care of Baron Von Kluck there?
Kaleb: (drunkenly from a corner, obviously less than caring) Who gives a flying cluck…
There we are, chapter 1… what do you think:D It's been ages since I did a proper story like this but I hope its as good as the original… let me know and I hope you enjoyed it
End Chapter 1