Insomnia

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Kishimoto-sensei.

He entered the living room in silence; mostly dark, lit only by a single lamp.

She was sitting on the floor, legs tucked beneath her, using her laptop on the coffee table.

"I thought you were sleeping," she said quietly, her oversized coffee mug cradled in her hands.

"I was," he said, voice still thick with sleep. "What time is it?"

"Um," she briefly glanced at the small clock on the computer screen, "it's twenty past midnight."

"Can't sleep?"

She shook her head no.

"Can I help?" there was a hint of humor in his voice.

He was shirtless and barefoot, wearing only a pair of baggy pants; she caught herself staring at him and colored deeply, and tried to hide her face behind her coffee.

His brown eyes sparkle with amusement, but he pretended not to notice as he closed the distance between them.

She smiled up at him, flashing her pearly whites. "Good morning."

"Ah," came his weak reply.

She felt his lips brush her temple.

"I'm sorry I woke you up."

He had the grace to shrug. "Don't be, I'm barely awake as it is."

"Do you want anything? Coffee?"

He shook his head and sat down on the floor next to her, one leg stretched straight out on the floor and the other bent at the knee.

"Are you sure?" she insisted.

He waved a hand in front of him, dismissing the subject, and leaned back against the black leather couch.

Absently, she reached to push long hair away from his face.

"I'm almost done," she said and resumed typing on her computer; the sound muffled by the rain outside.

He closed his eyes, willing himself to sleep, but knowing he would failed miserably.

Sleep did not come.

They'd been 'dating' for two years, and she had let him into her personal space only 4 months ago; he was spending almost every night at her apartment since, not really sleeping at all.

Shikamaru never had a problem sleeping. In fact, he was known for his feline ability to sleep anywhere, anytime. He was a doctor and, like any other person in the fieldwork, he slept any time he needed to sleep; he would just close his eyes and off he'd go to dreamland.

But then he met her.

Hinata was a writer with troublesome habits. Her writing is compulsive; once she starts writing a new novel she simply cannot stop. She is an insomniac and, according to her, had been since childhood. She literally couldn't sleep before 3 a.m. Shikamaru believed that's why she became a writer: she wrote until she was exhausted enough to fall asleep.

He was becoming an insomniac, too...or losing his mind.

Shikamaru couldn't even sleep without her next to him; he needed to hear her soft breathing beside him, otherwise, he awoke with a strange sense of panic.

Like tonight.

But he didn't mind the lack of sleep -well, not much, anyway- because more often than not, Hinata let him have his way with her until her body was tired enough to sleep.

Shikamaru vaguely wondered if she was in the mood for something...wild?

Anything.

He opened one eye, then the other, and peered at the woman next to him, her large pale eyes framed by her bangs.

He gave her a quick once-over.

She was wearing flannel pajamas and her long dark hair was up in a messy bun.

Probably not, he thought.

But maybe, if he tried hard enough, he could convince her...

He stared up at the ceiling.

Then again, there was something he wanted to ask her - something that has been nagging at him for the last few weeks...no, months.

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye; she hummed a silly little tune to herself, one that Shikamaru could never name.

Hinata seemed to be in a good mood, maybe he should just get it over with.

Lightning struck somewhere nearby and he felt her jump in response.

He quickly closed his eyes.

"A - are you awake?" she stuttered, her hands poised over the keyboard.

There was no answer.

Hinata was beyond obsessed with the rain but she did not like thunderstorms.

She closed her laptop without shutting it down and kneeled closer to him. "Shikamaru?" she whispered, her face close to his.

Again there was no answer; defeated, she pulled back.

He fell asleep.

With that thought in mind, she allowed herself to admire his sleeping form, or what she thought was his sleeping form.

To Hinata, he looked like a child when he slept, with his long eyelashes and slightly parted lips; cares and worries erased by peaceful oblivion.

She suddenly wanted to hold him and to kiss him and -

"You're staring at me again," Shikamaru said, eyes still closed.

Her eyes went wide, like a startled deer's, and she flushed.

"N - no, no I - I wasn't!"

"Oh, really?"

"R - really."

Of course, she had been staring at him, but no way was she going to admit it.

Besides, he was supposed to be sleeping!

...and was that a smile upon his lips?

"You tricked me, I - I thought you were sleeping!" Hinata said, trying to look offended and failing very, very miserably...

He muttered something that sounded suspiciously like "pervert" before he caught her by the waist and kissed her neck.

An involuntary "eep!" sound scaped her lips.

"You smell nice."

She was suddenly sitting on his lap, her legs wrapped around his waist.

"W - what?" she stammered, her face crimson.

"You smell nice," he repeated.

Not knowing what to do, Hinata slid her arms around his neck. "Oh...um, thank you?"

And then he kissed her once, lightly, on the lips; she tasted like coffee.

"Lets get married and have a bunch of kids," he said suddenly.

A small smile appeared on her lips.

"But you always say kids are troublesome!"

He seemed to ponder something for a moment. "They are," he said, wrinkling his nose in distaste.

She seemed to agree with him.

Hinata brought her hand up and ran her index finger down the bridge of his nose and to his lips; he caught her hand in his own and held it to his cheek.

She smiled wide at that.

"You look tired," Hinata said.

"So do you," Shikamaru countered.

She shrugged and captured his smile in a kiss.

Lightning struck again; she was suddenly not afraid.

His kisses trailed down her neck and his hands fought with the buttons of her pajama top.

"We can't," she breathed softly.

"Why can't we?" he asked, pulling back.

Her eyes darted guiltily away from his. "S - sorry, I - I'm...not in the mood."

Shikamaru regarded her silently for a minute or two. "Are you ever in the mood?" he asked, not mad.

"It's cold."

"It's winter, it's always cold."

"I'm...tired?"

He pouted and looked absolutely adorable. "If you ever are in the mood, let me know."

"I'm sorry," she said against his lips.

"Yeah, yeah," he said lazily.

Hinata dropped her head onto his shoulder, her lips against his neck, and felt herself falling asleep, the exhaustion of the day's work setting in. She had a deadline to meet by friday and the lack of sleep made her less effective than she like, so she had been working nearly non-stop for days.

In a couple of hours she has a meeting with her editors to discuss the illustrations in her book, the logical thing to do was to go to bed and try to sleep, but all she had thought of the whole day was being in his arms, just like this.

He was working at the hospital the same as he always did, but planning to open his own private practice was taking a lot of his time - she missed him.

He pressed a kiss into her hair, his arms loosely wrapped around her waist.

"Hinata?"

"Hm?"

She shifted her position slightly and pressed closer to him, seeking comfort.

If she fell asleep, he would carry her into her bedroom; he always did.

"Shikamaru?" she asked, in a low sleepy voice.

Unconsciously, her hand found his head and her fingers began playing with his hair.

They were silent for a while before he spoke again.

"Lets do it. We can live in my apartment until we get settled or if you want we can move into my house righ away. It's not far from the city, but it's too big, too empty," his voice trailed off.

Hinata nodded absently.

His house was huge and had gorgeous gardens and fields. Last time she was there, she had seen some deer near the river...

Her musing stopped abruptly.

She opened her eyes and focused on the far wall. "...what do you mean?" she asked in a whisper, but the color that rose in her cheeks and the lump on her thoat indicated that she understood what he meant perfectly well.

"Lets do it. Let's get married," he said simply.

She looked up at him, fully awake now. "W - what?"

He shifted uncomfortably and cleared his throat. "Would you marry me?"

And then there was silence. Deep, uncomfortable silence.

Hinata knew that she shouldn't have been surprised, but she was.

They had been together for two years and one morning, when Shikamaru came into the bathroom and shaved while she was taking a shower, Hinata realized they were practically living together.

He even gave her a key to his apartment. (Which Hinata never used.)

It was only a matter of time before one of them brought up the subject of marriage.

It only made sense.

He slept with her almost every night and kept clothes, a toothbrush, and books in her apartment. They had their routines. She visited him at work every Tuesday and had lunch with him in the hospital cafeteria - eating her food. They spend their evenings talking about everything and nothing and sharing cinnamon rolls and coffee. On the rare occassions when they weren't completely consumed by work, they laid beside one another on the ground and Hinata engaged in his favorite pastime: watching the clouds drift by.

Hinata cooked him dinner, sometimes she did his laundry. Shikamaru fixed breakfast almost every morning, which they ate in their pajamas like an old married couple.

But unlike an old married couple, there's no resentment between them.

This was a serious relationship, with all the emotional baggage and the closeness you can only have when you're serious about moving forward together down the path that would eventually lead to marriage.

Because that's what people do when they fall in love: they get married.

Love.

She is deeply in love with this man, and yet, she couldn't help but wonder...

"Why?"

Frowning, he searched her eyes; he couldn't read her expression.

He'd planned this moment for weeks. In his head he'd expected her to be happy, maybe break down and cry; he hadn't expected her to ask him why.

Shikamaru was confused, wasn't marriage what all women want?

Women, he concluded, were such a puzzle.

Sighing, he cupped her face in his hands; rosy cheeks and scarlet red lips. "Why...do I want to marry you?"

Hinata opened her mouth to say something but before she could speak, Shikamaru kissed her lips.

"I want to marry you because I'm in love with you, but you already know that. I want to fall asleep next to your eyes every night, and I want to wake up next to you in the morning, for the rest of my life. And if you want to marry me I hope you want to have children because I want to see a little boy and a little girl on your lap and in your arms."

"Shikamaru..."

"Though, you can always say no. You're allowed to do that."

Even as her small hands gripped his wrists and tore his hands away from her face, she was weakly smiling.

She's odd.

"That's n - not what I meant...I..." she attempted to leap up to her feet but his hold on her tighten. "Why now?"

Shikamaru blinked and titled his head to one side, puzzled. "Why not?"

"I - it's sudden, it's...so unlike you," she took a deep breath. "You don't act on impulses, y - you tend to think things through...c - carefully, step by step."

It was true.

He had a keen mind and the natural ability to think things through, carefully and logically. He made lists before he made decisions; when you were hasty, you did stupid things - Shikamaru was anything but stupid.

...then why did he feel like he had rushed in like a fool?

"It's not so sudden, actually," he said and scratched the back of his neck thoughtfully. "I've been thinking about it for months."

"O - oh."

Oh?

"I - need coffee." And with that she went into the kitchen, leaving a scowling Shikamaru in her wake.

Wordlessly, he followed her and lingered in the door way, watching her rummage through the cupboards.

"Coffe?" she offered, almost absently

"No."

She sat down at the table and pretended to be busy drinking her coffe.

Shikamaru glanced at the clock above the stove. Almost two a.m. According to his biological clock, he'd be falling asleep any minute now.

He didn't know why she was so upset...

Granted, this was not how he intended to propose to her. He meant to take Ino's advice and propose to her in a more romantic way. Drop to one knee, hold her hand in his, declare his undying love for her, the whole thing. That's how he meant to do it but...

He wasn't the romantic type anyway and she knew that.

Over the rim of her coffee cup, she watch him joined her at the table

Shikamaru put one elbow on the table and rested his chin in his hand. "So which is it? You don't wanna marry me? You don't wanna have kids? Both?"

Under the table, she crossed one leg over the other.

Most people who didn't know Hinata always assumed that she was a great cook, that she loved, just loved, cooking and baking cakes. They also assumed one of her greatest dream was to get married and have a bunch of kids.

Literally.

"I can't cook," she declared.

Actually, Hinata was a pretty descent cook. She'd just rather spend her time on something...more productive.

"You can cook, you just don't like it because you were pampered most of your life," he said, eyelids almost close.

That was true.

When she lived with her father, Hinata had servants and nannies, and even a driver. Hyuuga Hiashi also liked to imposed discipline, but mostly he spoiled and pampered her because he was always working and that was his way of compensating his absence.

Shikamaru continued, "And that's all right with me because I'm not trying to secure a maid. I'm trying to ask you to marry me but it's not working."

"I haven't said no."

When he glanced at her, she blushed and looked away.

"Not yet," he muttered.

She took to ignoring him completely.

I'm good at boiling stuff, she thought, and he likes the rice balls I make.

They sat in silence, both lost in thought.

Marriage.

When Hinata was 12 she developed an instant crush on Uzumaki Naruto, the goofy boy from class. He had messy blond hair and blue eyes - the bluest eyes she had ever seen.

For the longest time she dreamed of running away with him. Not marriage, not a legal contract that stated 'I finally own you,' not a social convention, not even an official announcement.

She would just run off with him and 'live happily ever after' in some western country where no one knew them.

It never happen.

When Shikamaru was 12 he decided that, ulltimately, he wanted to get married and raise a family. And when his kids, one boy and one girl, became independent, he'd retired.

The only thing missing in his perfect plan was a wife.

Before Hinata, he had never met any woman that he wanted to marry.

All the women he got involve with were too skinny, too aggressive, and too loud. It didn't stop him from sleeping with them, but when he tried to visualize a future with any of them, he saw nothing.

It was strange.

Until now, he had never seriously discussed marriage with Hinata, but he knew, he'd know for a long time, that one day he would marry her.

Shikamaru had never consider that perhaps Hinata didn't want to marry him.

If that was the case, and apparently it was, he couldn't blame her.

He was a walking conflict.

I should've dropped to one knee, he thought.

Children.

Shikamaru didn't hate kids but he did find them...well, troublesome.

Children were rude, ungrateful, and selfish, and they seemed to like to jump on top of him.

Generally, he liked them more when they were old enough to talk and understand commands like 'go away.'

But as annoying kids as could be, deep inside, he felt an emotional pull. Fatherhood was something he knew nothing about but that he wanted to experience all the same.

And if they ever have children, he sincerely hopes their kids look like her and and act like her.

She is beautiful.

Beautiful in every way that a person can be beautiful; with those awkward gestures, that perfect nose, that perfect smile on those perfect crimson lips, and that constant sparkle in her eyes.

And she has really big...

Unconsciously, his gaze drifted down to her breasts. Shikamaru had been surprised when he found out Hinata had really big...well, Hinata was blessed with big breasts.

He titled his head a bit.

Those are really big for such a small woman...

But he wasn't complaining.

Wait...I'm not a pervert! he thought sheepishly, averting his eyes. When did I become a pervert?!

She was rubbing off on him.

Hinata liked kids just fine - other people's kids.

She liked Neji's daughter, an adorable four-year old who liked to pull her father's hair. She had, reluctantly, baby-sat her once. It had been fun to watch her play with Shikamaru, run and jump on top him.

But she had never really seen herself raising kids.

Then again, her cousin didn't want children, and now his wife was expecting their second child...

It's always the people who don't want kids that have them.

Life was weird like that.

It's not that I don't want any kids...

She had never thought about motherhood.

But that's understandable, isn't it?

Hinata was only 24, she wasn't up against that infamous clock.

She glanced over at Shikamaru who was on the verge of falling asleep and looked...just a bit disturbed.

Maybe a little boy would be nice.

Boys were their mothers.

A little boy with brown hair and brown eyes.

She felt herself want to smile.

Demo...I'm clumsy...

What if she dropped him?!

"What if I drop him?!" Hinata blurted out suddenly.

Shikamaru almost fell off his chair. "...who?"

"The baby."

Not for the first time, Shikamaru wondered if his girlfriend was going insane. "...what baby?"

"Our baby," she said, as if that made sense, and put her cup down carefully.

None of it made any sense to him.

"C - children are a b - big responsibility," she said very quietly, holding his stare.

"I want to share that responsibility with you."

Because he loves me...

Her gaze drifted from his eyes to his lips and down to his chest - his bare chest.

It was then she remembered his state of undress.

She blushed and quickly looked down at at the cup of coffee in front of her.

"A - aren't you cold like that? Wear a s - sweater or something..."

He shrugged or attempted to shrug, for his left shoulder alone moved. "I'm comfortable like this."

But I'm not, Hinata realized.

How can they have a serious conversation when his almost naked?!

He distracted her, plain and simpe.

She often caught herself staring at him and Shikamaru often caught her staring as well.

It was embarrassing; she did nothing but blush around him!

Hinata had always liked his body, it was so nice to look at and...

She suddenly flinched when he poke her nose.

"Why did you do that?" she asked, a little offended.

"You're thinking too hard," he said, "it's giving me a headache."

"S - sorry."

He yawned and rubbed his eyes.

"Um...Shikamaru?"

"Hm?"

"I don't think I have that - " she paused, searching for the right words, "...motherly instinct."

Sakura had told her about her strong motherly instinct, and how she had felt it even before her daughter was born. Hinata hadn't really been paying attention though, she usually got bored by stories about other people's kids...

Whatever motherly instinct was, Hinata had never really felt it or didn't feel it very strongly.

Maybe she was missing the bride gene and the mother gene?

"I think it's a parenting instinct," he shrugged again, "though I could be wrong."

For him, it wasn't about 'motherly instinct'...it was just human nature for parents to love their children unconditionally, to care for them and to help them for purely selfless reasons.

Shikamaru stared at her.

There was something in his eyes she couldn't quite recognize.

"Don't you want children?" he asked.

He knew most women wanted to be mothers.

"I d - don't know," she shifted in her chair. "What about you? Do you really want children?"

Hinata was pretty sure she already knew the answer but she needed to know where she stood with him now that he knew her doubts and almost apathy towards motherhood.

But, unlike Hinata, Shikamaru never doubts her capacity for motherhood.

"Sure," he said, "but first I figured I should find a wife, then worry about the children."

She nodded slowly.

They were too young to have kids now, but later, he definitely wanted to have children with her.

But that's not the reason he wants to marry her, he wants to marry her because -

I'm in love with her.

The first time he realized he loved her was when he spend a week looking for a birthday present for her; his past relationships with women weren't intimate enough for him to care about silly things like birthdays...or holidays...or anniversaries.

The first time he had felt like saying it was when he came down with the flu and she spend a week playing Shogi with him; she hated Shogi.

The first time he had actually said it was over breakfast one morning and he watched, amused, as her eyes went wide and she choked on her apple; it was only a week after that she muster up the courage to tell him that she loved him too.

She loves me.

Shikamaru knows that against all her better judgement, she loves him; why else would she put up him for this long?

His hand reached across the table for hers; soft and warm.

Suprised, Hinata could only stare at her small hand, which lay captive.

"Do you want me to drop to one knee and beg you to marry me?" Shikamaru asked, defeated.

Blushing, she met his eyes. "No one gets down on one knee anymore."

"That's what I told Ino!"

Her lips curved in a faint smile.

She didn't know why she had panicked; she loved Shikamaru and he was hers to keep - if she wanted.

And she did.

"I think...I'd like to marry you...if that's what you want," she said very carefully.

Shikamaru smirked. "You're asking me to marry you," he said bluntly, teasing her.

Hinata almost fell off her chair.

"Hai," she managed, blushing. "I'm asking you to marry me."

He walked around the table and kneeled next to her; numbly, she turned to face him.

"You don't - "

Hesitating, he took hold of her hand again. "You want to marry me," he muttered, softly.

She nodded and bent down to kiss him.

A week later they got married.

When Hyuuga Hiashi found out, he almost killed Nara Shikamaru.

-almost.

They had 17 kids and lived happily ever after.

The End.

Thanks for reading.