Forgotten Dreams

Chapter 1

Dean slowly gazed out of the window of the impala. The snowy mountains did nothing to inspire or soothe him.

He was dying

Sam drove silently next to him but he could feel his little brother's anger rolling off him in waves. There were too many words left unspoken between them.

"Sam..."

"No, Dean...unless you've changed your mind...no I don't want to talk to you"

Sam then flicked at the radio, the first song that came on was Bing Crosby's 'I'm dreaming of a white Christmas'. The groan was expected and because of it Sam refused to change the station.

But for Dean it was more than annoying, it was painful...In his mind he could hear the soft warm laugh that stayed with him always.

Slowly and under his breath he said..."Buffy..."

Dean felt his eyes slowly close at the memory of meeting her. Buffy had been a highlight of a very dim life.

Enter flashback

Dean sat atop a cold tombstone watching his father intently. "Dad?"

The older man flipped through the pages of his journal as he looked around as if to assure himself this was the right place.

"Dad..." Dean began again.

As if on cue their quarry came running out from the clearing ahead of them. Over 7 ft tall and a slight greenish tinge to it, the Vahral demon didn't even see them as it made its path through the trees.

"Dude...that's one fugly..." Dean murmured to himself right before the thing ran straight into him eliciting an oomph from the force of the blow.

Landing flat on his back, Dean rolled left, forcing the demon beneath his own frame trying to pin it. But super-strength won out and the demon picked him up by the collar and dragged him to his feet.

"Now look I apologize..." Dean stopped as he heard the whiz of a crossbow bolt come past his own right ear. It embed itself in the throat of the demon, its acidic blood pouring from the wound. Dean looked around for his father but the man was nowhere in view.

"Miss Summers...glad you could make it" Dean heard his father say.

"Yeah me too...so glad you chose to use your son as bait to get me out here" There was a woman's voice. He realised that the pair were in the clearing and the shot had come through the trees and about 300 yards to where he stood. But what he noticed more than anything was her laugh, slight and bitter like his own at the idea that someone would do what his father had done.

Squinting, Dean looked for the figures as he walked towards the clearing. “Tell me John are all your boys this stupid?" Turning around Dean let out a little whoa as he almost walked into a petite blonde.

"Hi..." Dean's usual level of sarcasm was present as he took a look at the woman. She was barely 5'3 but with a gymnast's body, tight but with her there was the feeling she was coiled ready to strike. His eye's trailed the impressive swell of her breasts to the slender lines of her neck to the intense mossy green gaze.

Raising her eyebrow but her gaze had followed a similar path to his and he saw the appreciative gaze in her eyes. "I'm..."

"Dean, yeah I know" All matter of fact, the woman was seemingly unimpressed.

"And you are...?" Dean let his boyish smile through as he asked.

"None of your business" Without another word she stalked into the clearing while walking past the demon to pull out her bolt from itself flesh.

End Flashback

Dean smiled that same smile to himself as he remembered how much she had protested on not telling him who she was...

Oh how the mighty fall

Chapter 2

Having found a reasonable hotel, the brothers fought off the jokes about their sexuality and whether or not they were newlywed long enough to get to their room and throw down what little they needed for the night.

Dean barely got his bag on the ground before Sam started again about his ‘situation’. It wasn’t what he said…it was what he didn’t say, Sam looked so defeated like looked like…like he did the day of their father’s funeral.

So Dean decided to let Sam have it for all that it was worth. “You’re right Sam, I give…I’m dying! And there is nothing I can do about but I did it for you and that makes it okay for me!” Dean let out a long sigh turning away from his brother.

“But Dean…aren’t there things you want ? Things you’d live for?” Sam pleaded

“Of course there are things I want!…” Dean felt another memory roll off him.

Enter flashback

Both Buffy and Dean stormed the Summers’ household, Buffy was thankful Dawn was staying with friends as she felt her emotions rise.

“Buffy…”

“Don’t Dean…you think you know me? You think I’m a hunter like you plain and simple? Well no it

doesn’t work like that, you wouldn’t believe the dirty little things I’ve done” Buffy held his gaze hoping that he would give but he didn’t.

“Tell me” Dean slowly backed her up against the wall next to the stairs.

“No”

“You say you’ve done this things but you won’t share?” His hand went to the right side of where her head lay.

“You think you’re ready but your not” Buffy licked her lips as she turned her head away

“Why won’t you just let me in” He pleaded his left hang grazed her hip, slowly, temptingly. His lips began to hover slightly over hers.

It was up to her to take the final step, to offer herself to him, “Dean…” Her voice had become a breathy whisper.

“Sssh…” Then his lips where on hers, gently pressing over them still waiting for some sign of reciprocation. Her lips gave just an inch, that was all he needed, arms around her Dean lifted Buffy gently off the floor, kissing her lips, cheek and neck as he carried her to her room.

End Flashback

Sam watched his brother slide off into another trance, this had been happening more often and for longer periods of time. “Dean?” He called quietly

“Sam…” Dean called hoarsely, “I want to go home”

“Dean…home?” Sam looked confused, does he mean Kansas?

“I want to see her…I have to see her” Dean looked out the window, determined and strong

Chapter 3

After it had been decided between the brothers that they would travel to California, Dean had said less and less since the topic had been breached several hours ago. Sam had for several minutes stared on amazedly at his brother until Dean had slapped him at the back of his head while going to the fridge for the now chilling beer.

“What? What now Sam?” Dean was exacerbated by his brother’s consistent shock at every move he made that didn’t fit into the little Dean ideal he had made all those years ago.

“Nothing…it’s nothing just…merry Christmas big brother” Sam smiled slightly as he looked around the motel room with its twinkly fairy lights and tinsel.

“Christmas? Sam what the hell you…” Dean stopped as if finally to take stock of the room, which Sam was sure he hadn’t done since his little omission.

“December 22nd today” Sam informed him.

“Jeez look at it in here…it’s a Christmas nightmare” Dean frowned heavily. Sam was right about him not thinking about anything other than Buffy. Looking around the room he didn’t think twice as he allowed the soothing memory wash over him.

Enter Flashback

The slow tendrils of ’I’ve been dreaming of a White Christmas’ crawled into senses unknown as Dean held Buffy in his arms. Sunnydale was the longest place he had stayed in, he wanted to say along time but it was the longest time ever.

Despite this and all its connotations Dean smiled gently. At his right was a beautifully decorated Christmas tree, Buffy and Dawn had spent hours fiddling with the decorations, apparently it had been a tradition when their mother was alive. Dean had no such traditions but Buffy had welcomed him warmly into her own with her open sweet smile.

Swaying gently to the music, “I can see Christmas…” Buffy said softly to Dean’s chest. Dean chuckled at this, “Sweetheart I don’t think…”

“No…” She too laughed as she realised how it sounded, “What I meant is…last year we didn’t even notice Christmas with everything going on but now I can see it and enjoy it…with you” The unspoken words choked behind…for now.

End Flashback

Dean had so badly wanted to stay after their perfect little holiday but it was never on the cards for them. He had felt it in the coming days after he left that part of him would always be left behind.

For god’s sake I need to shake this off…like now Dean thought disgustedly, he wasn’t a soft touchy feely guy, not like Sam anyway but around her he felt like the biggest idiot in the world.

Must be love…Shut up Dean mentally told himself as he took his beer and brought it to his lips with a smile for the days ahead…it would be interesting that’s for sure.

Chapter 4

In her sleep, the Slayer dreamed…

Buffy smoothed down her white gown, she didn’t want him to see her all dirty. Taking a seat, the scope of the graveyard was for all to see. But this was not one familiar to Buffy, to her right she saw a large mausoleum and frown as she saw it for the first time. It was bound shut by a pentagram.

“But wait…” She heard herself say.

A man stood by the door, “She was just like you you know…hair all pretty and a fire in her belly”

“Do I know you?” Buffy asked but she felt out of place now, like she was almost out of time.

“No but I know you’re the Slayer, just she was, she was the key, she made the world spin” The man, left no impression, no face, nothing that Buffy could access to in the recesses of her mind.

“Please…I don’t have a lot of time” Buffy pleaded in her dreamy subconscious.

“Bleed and the world will be saved from his coming” The man slashed her forearm with a blade she had not even know was there.

Buffy got over her shock of what had happened and threw herself into a fighter’s stance. But when she looked up there was nothing there. She felt a hand on her shoulder, spinning she raised her hand to strike out but Dean just smiled.

“My love, you see with you eyes but not with your heart” Buffy smiled at how dashing he looked in his black dinner shirt and slacks.

“Yeah well seeing with my eyes keeps me alive” Buffy felt part of the dream-like haze wearing off. But the desire she felt for him was very real.

Dean gently brushed his lips across hers, in the softest of gestures, “But some…some can’t survive”

“Sure if you fight…” Buffy stop herself when she looked into Dream-Dean’s eyes. He smiled softly, “Damn, eyes windows to the soul”

“Dean what’s happening to you?” Buffy asked tentatively

Pulling her in to the circle of his arms hard, Buffy felt the press of his body, taut and ready for action. “No matter how hard you try…some people can’t be saved…shouldn’t be saved” Like before Buffy didn’t see the knife until the blade was centimetres from her chest.

Acting instinctively she reacted and found herself upright in her bedBuffy took a breath before the tears and sobs racked her body. She had seen into his eyes, she had seen Dean’s fate. She had seen his grave