My hair smells like grease, my breath like dirty ash and booze, my body like sweat. I'm sitting here, on the hilltop in the park. You know, the park where you found me sitting that one day? My clothes all ruffled and my skin all bruised? And you pitied me. I could never understand how a machine could pity. When I was young I often forgot that you were part human.

You took me home. Well, you didn't call it home. You called it your base. It didn't matter to me. You wrapped me up and made me rest. You cared. I think that was the first time I've felt compassion. From an alien.

I'm laughing to myself. My God. When I was young. How many things I have come to regret. Even though they still say I am young. Just out of college, my whole life ahead of me.

No, they're wrong. It's my father's life. It was only because I was young that he allowed my fascination with the paranormal to go on. I grew a bit taller and he snatched that away from me. No choice.

But what am I reminiscing in the past for, hm? You would have called me a fool. A "foolish hyuuman". But you know, you were right. We are fools. Blind fools.

I miss you. You could have seen me. You could have stopped me from sinking to their level. But you're gone now. Have been for years. I've almost given up hope on the paranormal.

But if you were here. If only you were here, Zim.

You would've stopped me. You could have stopped me. Now I'm just a clerk at some god forsaken store selling to god forsaken fools with Tak's old ship just sitting in my garage. I haven't touched it for years. Oh, it still works, that's not the problem. It's the fuel. The tank sprung a leak and I don't know how to get more. I've tried human fuels. Almost blew up my house. If I could escape I would, in an instant.

But I can't. Even though the airs getting dirtier every year, the water murkier, and the people stupider, I'm stuck because I don't have any way of leaving other than Nasa. And they won't let me in because of my eyesight.

Oh, if you were her you'd laugh. I've often looked up in the sky and heard you taunting me. Your stupid voice cackling down from the heavens. Why you and not me? Why didn't you at least take me with you?

Yes, it's true. I miss you. And I wish you would have taken me with you. It's shameful, but since you left I have nothing. So I turned to parties, drinking and smoking. Nothing illegal, but... it's not how I pictured it. Growing up. I thought you'd be here.

I must sound pretty stupid, talking to the sky up on some stupid hill, hm? I still hope you can hear me, though.

The fireworks are starting soon.

Yeah, it's New Years eve. A "stoopid Irthenoid holleeday", you would've said. And there'll be fireworks. It's kinda cool, the grass is nice and dewy, most likely gonna frost over by morning, but I don't care. I just want to look at the stars and the light show. Bring in the New Year beautifully.

I miss you so much. I would have gone as a slave, just to see the stars. They get dimmer and dimmer, every year. Soon no one will even remember what they look like. No one will be able to see out into the cosmos anymore. It'll just be a big grey patch of smog, the sky. I imagine you wouldn've hated to watch that- your home disappearing from sight.

I wonder if you've conquered any planets in Earth's stead. That must have been why you left, right? Right? Your leaders must have re-assigned you or something. You wouldn't just leave me... leave Earth alone.

You don't even know what you've done to me. At first I celebrated, like an idiot. Earth was safe! But after a while that wore off and I found myself with... nothing. No new persuits. No research to be done. A big empty hole in my life. And at first it was nice. Oh, great, I don't have that stupid alien to worry about anymore! But then...

I don't know why I'm telling you this. You can't even hear me. You're a million million million miles away. It just feels nice to get it out, I guess. Out with the old, in with the new. Right?

You could have at least told me you were leaving. Given me something to do. Left me with a scrap of old technology or something. Left me GIR. Anything.

But here I am, staring up at the sky, wasted and telling you everything in an attempt to ease my mind. I hate you. I hate you so much, and yet I miss you. Because if you were here you'd tell me you hated me too. And I'd have someone to talk to instead of talking to the stars like an idiot.

The first firework is going off. Red, like your true eyes. I've looked through my phtos, but none of them really capture your eyes right.

Next one is green. Like your skin. I always wondered why it was like that- I theorized it was much like a plant, especially because you never seemed to eat.

Next, purple. Like Tak's eyes. I can't belive we worked together for that. Well, actually, I do. I wish we could have done that at least one more time before you left.

Orange. I can't even think anymore. I miss you. I wish you would come and save me from this pointless exsistance. I look out the window before I sleep, every night, without fail, and wait for your stupid ship to come sailing down. For you to open the cockpit and laugh at me. Look at me and tell me what a stupid human I am. Then extend your gloved hand and tell me to come on, moron, get in, you dont have all day. And I'd call you a jerk, like I always did, and then we'd fly away. I'd fly away.

You were my only hope, Zim.

The fireworks are blazing now. What would you have thought of them? It's almost midnight. Almost a new year. A new chance. But there are no second chances on Earth, are there? Are there second chances in space?

Space- you would think it were a hopeless, endless sea of black. But there's stars everywhere. Comets, shining bright and streaking across the sky. Planets, like cosmic rainbows, circling their stars. There's so much. So much more than here. At least in space you can always find a new world. A new galaxy. Something.

"Hey doufus, I thought you came home to spend time with family. Come inside and watch the ball drop with us."

I grunt a reply. Fireworks are still going off. I guess they started early then.

I know you can't hear me- hear exactly what I'm thinking or saying. But I miss you. I hope you know that. And I hope you're staying strong, Invader Zim. Maybe one day a little bit of the cosmos can bring you down here. I'll keep watching.