I’m having a lot of fun typing this filler story. The next chapter of Like Mother, Like Daughter should be up by the end of the week, but I won’t make any promises. Anyway, onto Cortana’s torture! But first, some reviewers’ answers:

Lucradris: Maybe. Summer’s coming up. Who knows? (Shrugging face)

Dark Oak’s BubbeBuddy: Okay, I know you didn’t really ask a question, but I want to say I really like your profile name. (Happy face)

John P: No, not at all. I love Haloid, and the other fight he did with the girls from FF7. He kicks some serious ass; I just don’t think the chief would take too kindly to being turned into a girl. (Winking face.)

TakuOsuka: I doubt it; I’ll probably get Devil May Cry 4 before Assassin’s Creed. But hopefully I’ll find some ways to annoy Dante and Nero. (Hopeful face)

EmoDragonstar: Lol. You mean Avatar? (Laughing face)

1: Ask her if she knows anyone named HAL.

2: If she does, scream like a girl and run away.

3: Constantly remind her that she only has a lifespan of seven years.

4: If she cries, apologize and give her candy and chocolates.

5: Laugh as she cries even more.

6: Say that you know a way to get her back into a body. Tell her to come to the operating room in whatever ship she happens to be in at noon.

7: Lock her in with Miranda Keyes. Watch as she explodes at Cortana for asking her to come here while she was taking her shower.

8: Tell her to get her head out of the Recycle Bin.

9: Infect her with a tentacle virus. (Thank you, AFF)

10: Take pictures, but don’t let her see you.

11: Sign her up for counseling a month after she got tented. (Short for raped by tentacles.)

12: After she comes out, proudly announce over the intercom that you will be displaying the photos in an hour.

13: Asked if she got tented while she was captured by Gravemind.

14: If she changes the subject, try to put an arm around her and phase through.

15: Then for the next week, blatantly try to offer her counseling whenever she pops up in hologram form.

16: Spread rumors that Gravemind made her get breast implants during the break between games.

Alright, I think that’s it. I really should have thought of more, but I’m lazy and I didn’t feel like it. I may add more over time as I think of them, but anyway, read and review.

PS: I know I’m going to be called on this, so I’ll just say it now. I do not hate Cortana, I think she’s very smart and sexy for an AI, but I think she goes through too many ethically debatable experiences to not be made fun of.