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I
Don’t Swim
Part
One of Two
Characters:
Jack, Charlie (pt.2), Desmond (pt.2), Mikhail (pt2.), Sayid, Ben,
Hurley, Claire, Naomi.
Rating:
PG-13
Setting:
Through The Looking Glass
Disclaimer:
Don’t own. Wish I did, ‘cause then I could make Jack amazing.
Summary:
After Jack faces guilt for sending Charlie to the Looking Glass, Ben
sends him over the edge and he decides to go down himself…and
ultimately change the events that were fated to happen there.
Note: This is based on the impossible notion that - brace yourself - Jack cared about Charlie while he was RISKING HIS LIFE in the Looking Glass. I know it’s hard to wrap your minds around that concept. I feel like erasing his line in The Beginning of the End - “All I care about is missing the rescue boat.” Oh yes, Jack. You just reached your all-time low with the Charlie fans when you said that. Anyhow - I like making Jack human like he was in S1. But seriously…he needs to give me more to work with. (Maybe I only like him in S4 because I get to see him suffer in his flash forwards.)
He never wanted it to be this way.
Bewhat way? Nothing had even happened yet. The phone was still silent in his hand as he sat in the grass around the radio tower. Waiting for Charlie to fix the jamming equipment and rescue them all. Charlie didn’t deserve to be down in the station - but he was. Because of him.
Somehow he knew Charlie had lied when he told him how long he could hold his breath. Now, Jack found that he had been practically holding his own for longer.
“Your rockstar friend isn’t too quick, now, is he?”
Jack looked over his shoulder to see Naomi coming up next to him. He offered her a half smile and then his eyes drifted back down to the satellite phone. Naomi sat down next to him, staring at the phone intently as well. She shrugged slightly.
“Why’d you let him?”
I don’t know, Jack wanted to answer. But instead - “I guess I trust him.”
Naomi nodded slightly and chewed on her lip thoughtfully. “So, if he doesn’t do it? Then what?”
Jack’s expression darkened and he didn’t respond. Naomi studied him for a moment and then nudged him with her shoulder. “Hey - Moses. I asked you what we do next.”
“Jin!”
Jack glanced up to see Sayid, Jin, and Bernard walk over the hill and towards the tower. Sun had ran forward and embraced Jin. Bernard and Rose met in a similar manner. Jack handed the phone over to Naomi as he stood, jogging up to meet Sayid.
“You did it?” Jack asked. “All three tents? And they’re all-”
“Yes,” Sayid nodded. “They’re all dead. The ones that came for us, at least.”
Jack grinned and Sayid smiled. They both ended up looking back over at Naomi, who was up and pacing with the phone. Every now and then, she’d lift it up towards the radio tower and then bring it back down with a sigh.
Jack spotted Claire and Hurley together with Aaron. They looked glum and scared. Hurley had obviously been reassuring her, but Jack could tell the color was drained from his own face. Jack had overheard Hurley telling Claire that Charlie would be ok - and she had responded with ‘of course.’ It felt like, maybe, they were just throwing each other lies and false hopes. Like they already knew the outcome. But they were avoiding it.
“Nothing from Charlie?” Sayid asked, noting the disappointed faces and general inactivity at their spot by the tower.
“Nothing,” Jack answered bitterly.
“Whatever happens, Jack…” Sayid began, seeing how Jack’s face tensed and his jaw clenched. “It isn’t your fault.”
“Yes,” Jack objected, gritting his teeth and looking away from Sayid. “Yes it is. I let him go. And I knew that-”
“Jack, you heard him say how long he could hold his breath.”
“He was lying Sayid. I don’t even know…I don’t even know if he can swim. Our first few days here - Joanna drowned. And Charlie came to get me instead of going after her. Because he said he didn’t swim.”
Sayid frowned. “Perhaps he could, but he didn’t want that responsibility in his hands. So he came to get you.”
Jack wasn’t looking too convinced. “Either way, he’s not comfortable in the water.”
“Then why would he volunteer?”
“I don’t know.”
Jack bit down hard on his lip and did a scan of the people he was leading. All sitting in the grass - talking, glancing Naomi’s way, glancing his way. Charlie should’ve been one of them. Now, sending him to the Looking Glass just seemed like possibly the worst idea Jack had ever had. There were stronger swimmers. Taller men. People who had no one and would’ve been willing to go. But Charlie had weak limbs, a small stature, and an unofficial family. What had Charlie been thinking? What had Jack been thinking?
“Desmond is with him,” Sayid tried. “Desmond will-”
“I don’t even know Desmond!”
The exclamation alerted those who were near him. It certainly caught Claire and Hurley’s attention and they glanced up, alarmed. Jack lowered his voice.
“Why was Desmond with him when he offered to go, anyway? And why did Desmond decide to go with him?”
Sayid was getting uncomfortable with Jack’s sudden outburst of questions and regrets. He rested a hand on Jack’s shoulder and led him away from the group.
“What you need to do now is lead these people. I know you’re worried.” He paused. “So am I. But we can’t let that show through or everyone else will start to panic. We deal with this one step at a time. Bernard, Jin, and I accomplished what we had to do. Now we wait for Charlie.”
“I’ll give it a half hour,” Jack decided. “If we don’t get anything by then, I’m taking a group down to the beach.”
“I don’t know, Jack - that beach is pretty much in shambles after what your friend Sayid did to it.”
Jack turned to see Ben standing a few yards away, a radio in his hand. It appeared as if he had been standing and listening to them all along. Maybe he had.
Sayid grabbed his gun and pointed it at Ben, but the man hardly flinched. Jack quickly pushed the gun away and approached Ben.
“What the hell do you want?”
“Only a few minutes of your time,” Ben answered. “No guns. Only you.”
Jack considered this, and then turned to Sayid. “I’m going to see what he wants,” Jack decided. “Go back to everyone. If I’m not back in ten minutes, come back for me.”
Sayid hesitated and looked over at Ben.
“Sayid.”
Sayid finally nodded and turned back to walk towards the group.
Jack and Ben sat together, both keeping their hands in eyesight so the other would be sure that there would be no guns or weapons drawn. Ben wasn’t speaking - so Jack spoke first.
“How do I know you don’t have all your people surrounding us? And when you radio them -” he pointed at the walkie-talkie in Ben’s hand, “-they’ll shoot my people down.”
“Because you killed my best people, Jack. Tom, Ryan - all of them. We’re not going to kill your people. You are.”
Jack grinned and laughed, but at the same time he felt nervous and confused. “How…how am I going to do that, Ben?”
“These people that you’re going to phone - these people with Naomi. They are not who they say they are. They are part of a group that has been looking for this Island. And when you call them - they’ll kill all of you.”
“Why should I believe you?” Jack demanded. “You’ve never given me any reason to believe anything you say.”
“You won’t give me the phone, then?”
“That’s right.”
Ben frowned and switched on his walkie. “You may have killed a few of my best men - luckily I still have one.” Ben put the walkie to his ear. “Bonnie? Bonnie - I need Mikhail on right now.”
There was a slight rustle on the other end and then a thick, accented voice spoke up.
“Yes?”
“What we discussed earlier…” Ben began, glancing over at Jack. “Do it. It appears Shephard won’t let anything sway his mind, so we’ll have to stop this ourselves.”
Mikhail agreed and appeared to leave, but Ben kept the walkie on. “You’ll need to hear this,” he said.
Jack was on his feet now. “Hear what? What’re you doing? Where is he?!”
Ben didn’t answer. Only a minute or so later, two loud clear shots rang out in the background. There was only a brief pause between them. And then - silence.
“Who did he shoot?!” Jack exclaimed. “Who did he-”
“Charlie,” Ben said simply.
Jack’s stomach clenched and he stood still. “What?”
“The station isn’t flooded, Jack,” Ben explained. “I’m really sorry it had to come to this. If you had just agreed to give me the phone, we could’ve compromised. I could’ve asked Mikhail to bring Charlie back up to you. We could’ve made an exchange. After all - we’re not murderers.”
Jack sat, stunned.
“Bonnie and Greta - two of my people - they were there when Charlie swam down. They’ve been keeping him captive. I sent Mikhail - hoping that you and I could make an exchange. But you were unwilling. So I had to stop these people from coming in a more difficult way. Unfortunately, Bonnie and Greta will be next. They know the code to the jammer - and obviously, that’s too risky.”
Jack knocked the walkie away and tackled Ben down - landing swift, rough swings along his face and neck until Jack’s knuckles were bruised, scraped and bleeding. It went on like this - Jack didn’t know how long. Then he felt someone pull him back off of Ben, who now appeared to be unconscious.
“Jack! Jack!” Sayid exclaimed, pushing Jack down onto the ground, confused. “What happened-”
“He killed Charlie!” Jack yelled, cradling his sore hand against his chest as he stumbled to his feet. He quickly described to Sayid what had happened, stumbling miserably over his sentences.
Sayid winced and his eyes shifted downwards, his expression pained and disbelieving. “It was supposed to be me.”
Jack grabbed Sayid’s gun out of his hand and pointed it at Ben’s motionless body. His finger twitched against the trigger - and then the radio rustled again.
“Don’t answer it,” Jack told Sayid, gun still poised.
“Ben? Ben?” the accented voice asked over the static. “Are you there?”
Sayid and Jack exchanged looks.
“Ben - I cannot kill Charlie until he tells me where his friend went. Bonnie and Greta are dead. But Charlie’s friend - I saw him swim down here and he’s a threat. Once he tells, I’ll kill them both.” Then he cut off.
Jack closed his eyes, relief filling him as he shoved the gun in his waistband.
“Desmond. He means Desmond,” Sayid clarified, nodding.
“Yeah,” Jack agreed. He picked up the walkie and clipped it on his belt. “I’m going down there.”
Sayid didn’t look surprised. “I’ll go with you.”
“No,” Jack disagreed. “You need to stay here and lead them. And when I go down there, kill him, help Charlie and turn off the jammer - you’ll need to be here with the phone.”
“I have another walkie I took from the Others at the beach,” Sayid told him. “Radio me if you need anything. I’ll tell the others you went to the beach to check for Charlie, but I won’t tell them he’s in any danger.”
Jack nodded and pointed at Ben. “Tie him up. Don’t let him near anyone.”
Sayid almost looked hesitant as Jack wiped the blood on his hand off on his shirt and prepared to move out.
“Are you sure this is the right decision?” Sayid asked. “Perhaps I should go instead.”
“I owe this to him,” Jack objected. “He risked his life going into that cave for me. Why should I do anything different? Unlike you, Sayid, Charlie never told me to not go after him if something went wrong. I couldn’t forgive myself if anything happened to him.”
Sayid shook his head. “Hurley, keep it down!”
“What do you mean it’s a stupid idea?” Claire frowned, bouncing Aaron up and down. “At least someone’s doing something about it!”
“Yeah, but - it’s not supposed to be like this. It’s just supposed to work. We shouldn’t have to be second-guessing stuff!”
Claire sighed and glanced over at Sun with Jin and Rose with Bernard. They seemed happy, relieved, and - in general - worriless. Even with their present predicament - they seemed fine. If rescue didn’t come, they at least had each other. She hated thinking negatively - but she wondered if she’d have the same reassurance with Charlie.
Claire looked back at Sayid and watched him carefully. “There’s nothing that made Jack want to go, is there, Sayid?”
“Just the delay of the jamming equipment getting turned off,” Sayid lied.
Claire seemed to believe this, and she turned to Hurley. “See - it’ll be all right.” She offered him a forced smile, but Hurley was staring at Sayid skeptically.
But Sayid was good at getting out of lies and putting on a mask. He simply but a reassuring hand on Hurley’s shoulder. “Jack will be there. He’ll be ok.” That, at least, was the closest to the truth he could get without panicking them.
“Oh yeah. I forgot.” Hurley rolled his eyes and turned, walking away to go sit with Jin and Sun. “It’s okay!” he announced to the group. “Jack is saving the day!” He clapped Jin on the shoulder. “No worries, dude!”
Jin smiled at Hurley nervously.
Claire frowned and turned back to Sayid, but he had turned his back to her and was looking out over the hill in the direction Jack had left.
He hated keeping these secrets. He hated lying. Especially to the people that Charlie loved.
Jack frowned and walked over to her tent, picking up the crib and setting it right-side up. He readjusted the blankets, and just as he was ready to leave, the sun caught something in the sand. Jack bent down and picked up a tiny silver object. Charlie’s ring.
Jack couldn’t decide why Charlie had left it there. Perhaps he thought he would lose it during his swim. Or maybe Charlie didn’t think he would be coming back for it.
Right after that realization, Jack stopped thinking. He put the ring back in the crib and walked out towards the wire.
As he walked the beach, he saw two sets of footprints. There were Desmond’s, which were wide and long. And then Charlie’s - much smaller. Judging by the imprints, spacing, and distance…it appeared Charlie had been lagging. Perhaps mentally unwilling to complete the task. Or maybe doubting himself. Why hadn’t Charlie been able to talk to him? Or say no? They used to be able to talk. But after his stay with the Others, Jack knew he had lost a great deal of trust. And people had trusted him. He had been their leader, and then betrayed them, especially with his relationship with Juliet. He wished that he had appeared more open to Charlie.
When Claire was sick, Jack had asked Charlie if he trusted him. Charlie had hesitated, and that had sent Jack into a brief panic. It felt like he had forced Charlie into answering ‘yes’ - and now he wondered if Charlie had actually meant it.
No. He hadn’t. He had kept Naomi a secret. Lied right to his face that day in their “kitchen.” Their whole friendship, towards the end, had deteriorated. Jack wondered if, subconsciously, he had followed up on Charlie’s offer to swim down to the station because he had been angry at him for lying and losing trust.
No. It wasn’t that. It was too big of a decision to base who went down out of a petty thing like anger. It was based on trust. Maybe he had been telling Charlie - “I trust you, so I hope you’ll trust me again.”
Jack didn’t know anymore. There was too much he didn’t know about Charlie these days. Charlie had depended on a lot of people over the three months. There had been Locke, Eko…but Charlie’s dependence on Jack had remained pretty constant until these last few weeks. And then there had been Desmond.
Jack felt he understood the relationships people had on the Island. But the relationship Charlie and Desmond had…it still remained a huge mystery in Jack’s mind. Whenever he did see them together, they often seemed angry at each other. Desmond was always staring at Charlie like he was an object and he was trying to decide what to do with him. The situation up on the hill only a day ago came to mind.
Charlie and Desmond had been holding the back of their line, and when they arrived at the destination, Jack had looked over his shoulder from his place at the front to see Desmond turned to face Charlie. He couldn’t see Desmond’s face, but he remembered Charlie’s. Instead of going down to them to see what was wrong, he had just called for them to follow, and proceeded to announce his plan. And then he had never asked.
He didn’t know Desmond. He should’ve cared more.
But he had to focus on now. Charlie was down in the station with one of the Others who was planning on killing him after he found out where Desmond was. He didn’t know how long Charlie could hold him off.
So he’d have to trust him.
Jack turned on the walkie, hoping to get an idea of what was going on in the Looking Glass. He could hear faint talking in the background, but it was mostly covered by static. He couldn’t distinguish the voices - but he could tell one was raised and demanding. It occurred to Jack that this man named Mikhail, when he fired those two shots that Ben said were meant for Charlie…they had actually been meant for the two women Ben had mentioned. He could feel relieved now - knowing that Charlie didn’t have a bullet wound and two other threats were dead.
But…he didn’t know what Mikhail was doing to get the answers out of Charlie. And would he stop once he got the answer he wanted? Or would he push for more?
And then Jack heard the third shot.
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