Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.

Title: A Scandal in Karakura High School!

Summary: Hirako Shinji and Kurosaki Ichigo have been caught by someone doing unspeakable things to each other! Even worse, how will they catch the voyeur before the St. Valentine's Day newsletter is released to the whole school with the evidence? Yaoi.

Chapter IX: Conclusion! Sneaky Lieutenant

Friday, February 14th.

A ray of sunlight shined through the window of Ichigo's room, heating his face pleasantly. He furrowed his brow and stretched, opening his mouth in a loud yawn.

Something stirred against him, cuddling into his warmth.

Ichigo froze when someone's face buried into his neck, and his eyes snapped open. However, the light was too bright so he turned his head towards the wall and groaned.

Shinji blinked, his lips pressed against Ichigo's neck. A content grin spread over his face, and he kissed the flesh gently. "Good morning, Ichigo."

Ichigo recognized the voice instantly. "'Morning."

Shinji curled his fingers at Ichigo's hip comfortably.

"Well... we didn't get the pictures back," Ichigo murmured, sighing.

Shinji tensed. "If we have to, we can admit that we're a couple."

Ichigo shut his eyes and clenched his jaw. "I... I guess..."

A sigh. "I see. We need to get dressed." Shinji rose from the bed and collected pieces of his clothing. "I'm using your shower."

Ichigo shrugged at him and stood. "You can borrow my clothing. We wear pretty much the same size, I think."

With a nod, Shinji exited the room to quietly make his way to the bathroom.

Ichigo wordlessly sat on the edge of his bed and stared out the window, listening to the sound of Shinji starting the shower.

Ichigo and Shinji entered the classroom together, tensed, preparing for the inevitable silence that would greet them.

The sight that met them, however, was not one they had expected.

Every person in the room had a Valentine's Day newsletter in their grasp, and they were huddled in groups, giggling or picking fun at some of the things inside it.

Boxes of candy were piled on almost everyone's desks.

Keigo noticed the two teenagers, so he tackled Ichigo. "Ichigo, hey! You should see some of the couples in this newsletter! Some of them are crazy! Did you know about that cute girl Rakana and that dude Katsuto? Or Riri and Chuuya?"

"Wait," Ichigo froze, "can I see the newsletter?"

"There are two more over there." Keigo motioned to the podium. "One for you, and one for Hirako."

Ichigo and Shinji scrambled to collect their newsletters and scanned the pictures. Slowly, their eyes raised to lock with each others'.

No picture of them.

Orihime whispered something to Tatsuki and nodded towards the two teenagers before greeting them with, "Ichigo, Shinji, good morning!"

They spun around to greet the girl. "Hello, Orihime."

"What do you think of the Valentine's Day newsletter?" Tatsuki inquired, grinning. "Personally, I think this year's couples were very predictable."

"O-oh, yeah. Me, too," Ichigo stuttered, averting his eyes from Orihime's curious ones.

"Nothing that would surprise us." Shinji smirked, covering his relief.

Orihime slid her eyes to Shinji.

Ichigo stared at Orihime questioningly. "Hey, Orihime, can I talk to you outside for a minute?"

"Of course!"

Shinji watched them leave suspiciously.

Once outside and away from any possible eavesdroppers, Ichigo exclaimed, "Orihime, what happened? I thought the people who run the Valentine's Day newsletter had pictures of us!"

"Oh, yes," Orihime laughed nervously, "those."

Ichigo raised an eyebrow. "I would have thought that they would use it against us."

"That was the plan. However, those pictures went missing this morning."

"Missing? How?"

"We don't know for sure, but there aren't that many people working for this newsletter."

"Did you ever find out who owns it?"

"Mr. Urahara." Orihime blushed. "He... he's very enthusiastic about it."

"Mr. Hat-and-Clogs?" Ichigo growled. "He's dead!"

"No, Ichigo, don't." Orihime frowned, laying a hand on his shoulder. "It's just harmless fun."

"'Harmless fun'?" Ichigo hissed. "'Harmless fun'? You have no idea what we have had to go through for more than a week now, Orihime! We have had to suffer through the knowledge that someone knew that we had... done things like that!"

"Well, that wasn't very nice of him to do..." Orihime admitted hesitantly, "but other than that, it is a very successful newsletter."

Ichigo rubbed at his forehead tiredly. "Okay, I'll just talk to him about it."

"So, it's true?" Tatsuki interrupted, joining them, along with Shinji.

"What?"

"That you and Hirako have done it?"

Ichigo gaped, his cheeks reddening. "What?" He glared at Orihime, burning with embarrassment. "You told her?"

"N-no! She... she works for the newsletter, too!"

Shinji scratched the bridge of his nose. "Um..."

"I have to admit," Tatsuki began with a cheeky smile, "you two look hot together."

Shinji grinned, winking. "Yup, we do."

Ichigo sputtered indignantly. "Don't encourage her!"

"If the pictures hadn't been stolen, I would have kept them for myself," Tatsuki teased.

"The pictures were stolen?" Shinji wondered aloud. "Whoever has them now... has some very good blackmail."

Ichigo slapped his forehead. "That's right. That doesn't solve our problem much. It's only delayed it some."

"I don't know..." Orihime began. "The only members of the newsletter team were Mahana, Chizuru, Michiru, Ryou, Uryuu, Tatsuki, and me."

"None of them stole the pictures," Tatsuki explained to the dumbfounded teenagers. "We would have known about it. It was originally my plan to take them and hide them. We aren't like that, you know. We wouldn't embarrass you two like that."

"There weren't any other people working for the team?" Ichigo asked.

Orihime's eyes widened. "Captain Zaraki..."

Ichigo's eye twitched. "Seriously, Orihime, I don't think that—"

"No, no, that's not what I mean. Of course Captain Zaraki wouldn't take them for himself. But do you remember the fact that Lieutenant Yachiru is president of the Shinigami Women's Association?"

"'Lieutenant Yachiru'? 'Shinigami Women's Association'?" Tatsuki questioned.

"O-oh, don't worry about it, Tatsuki," Orihime stuttered, waving her hands wildly. "They're part of the army."

"Shinigami Women's Association..." Ichigo trailed off.

"From what I've heard from Lieutenant Yachiru," Orihime blushed, "they go crazy for pictures of nude men... They even post them in yearly calendars..."

Ichigo and Shinji gaped.

"So... their pictures are in a calendar in the army? Scary," Tatsuki shuddered.

"You can always ask Captain Zaraki," Orihime suggested. "He's at the Urahara Shop, I think."

"How could you?" Urahara scolded, waving an admonishing finger at Zaraki. "How could you steal the photos?"

"It wasn't my idea. Yachiru wanted them."

"You didn't have to take all of them, though."

"She said a lot of people requested their own copies."

Urahara sighed. "You do realize that you need to pay for this, right?"

"What do I have to do?" Zaraki rumbled.

"Well, I hear that a boy by the name of Ishida Uryuu needs to be punished for leaving the Valentine's Day newsletter..." Urahara trailed off, batting his eyes up at him hopefully.

Zaraki's lips twitched.

"I trust you know what to do," Urahara whispered, pushing a digital camera into Zaraki's hand.

Kusajishi Yachiru squealed as she passed out newly-printed calendars to random passerbys, "Enjoy the hotness that is Ichi and his lover, Pervy, in this year's Shinigami Women's Association calendar! Also, look for Bya nakey in a beach setting, and Shirou dipped in chocolate syrup!"

Kuchiki Byakuya stopped in front of the pink girl and raised a questioning eyebrow. "I do not require a calendar at this moment, but would you, by any chance, have copies of the photos of Kurosaki Ichigo and his 'Pervy'?"

"Yup! Right here!" Yachiru ripped open a satchel she was carrying and retrieved a picture. "Enjoy!"

Byakuya glanced around quickly and slid the photo into his shihakusho. "...Thank you."