Hey peoples!

Well, this is my first CL oneshot, yay!

Anyway, I guess I made this to go into a more realistic look towards Ulrich and Yumi's relationship. I know for one thing that fighting on Lyoko is probably a lot more serious matter than it is displayed to be, and therefore I wondered if such a thing could cause conflict among their relationship.

I also gave this thing all I got when it comes to detail. Hopefully things aren't confusing to you...

Inspired by the Hawthorne Heights song of the same name. Rated T to be safe.

Disclaimer: I do not own Code Lyoko, or the song: "This is Who We Are", which belongs to Hawthorne Heights.

-ooo-

His eyes slid open, the forest green that protruded from his glowing irises scaring off the encompassing darkness that surrounded him, swallowing him, bathing him in a pool of visible obsidian that left him smothered in bed, his hands grasping the tangled sheets until his knuckles paled into an intimidating white. With a face full of emotionless imagery, his eyes narrowed, chapped lips closed with a deep frown, although his expression maintained a stern value of some sort, he stayed silent, watching the shadows that crept up the walls of his dorm room like envious entities searching for a way out among the ceiling. Even with the shade of silhouetting silver that bled through the window blinds, leaking upon the carpeted floor in hues of the granting moon itself, depression still bounced off the darkened room, mocking him in eerie, noiseless bellows that not even the sleeping boy a few feet away from him could comprehend.

He remained without action, eventless, refusing to move from his sprawled position among his bed. Instead his forest green eyes focused on the essence of thin air, which gave him the chance to clear his mind from the feelings of sadness that were tugging on his nerves, leaving him with nothing but a clue of past depression that had existed only a few seconds ago. Slowly his malachite-colored irises danced across their colorless prisons, shifting his sight to the corners of the room, which, like the floors, desks, and other possessions, were damp with shadows, dubbing their white paint of simple design in ebony.

However, despite the returning depression and thoughts of tough calls that continued to hijack his inner attention, there was only one message among the midst of it that grasped the highest altitude of his distracted mind.

Meet me at the Kadic Academy rooftop tonight…

Those words had poured from her lips earlier that day with the most obvious hint of sadness he had ever seen. His thoughts had immediately begun to ponder on the matter, on the alibi that could’ve possibly played a part behind her calm order which left him wondering if something of great tragedy had occurred that he didn’t know about. Of course, he knew that if an event of that low of a stature were to have happened recently, she probably would have never bothered to come to school. Then again, maybe she just needed to tell somebody; perhaps to imply that she needed comfort for the unfortunate case that none of their other friends seemed to be aware of.

Muttering a curse under the lingering touch of his stern voice, he flung his legs over the side of the bed, immediately bringing his hands up to massage away the tiredness of his facial muscles, causing a short sigh to erupt from the bowels behind his chapped lips. He shot an expressionless look towards the sleeping student who was snoozing away on his own cheap mattress a few feet away from his. With a groggy kick and a moan of dreaming misunderstandings the young boy turned over, his scrawny arm falling over the side of the bed, hanging limply.

He remained still, yet causal looking, his expression displaying a weak hint of determination, although sternness radiated from his features. He didn’t take his narrowed eyes off the boy, who had moaned out another pointless squeak as dreams pulled him into a mental fantasy behind closed eyelids, but then again he expected nothing else from Odd Della-Robbia.

As darkness continued to hug Odd’s sleeping figure, the auburn-haired teen slowly got up, popping the stress from his back muscles before getting dressed, making his way through the dorm room’s metallic door and walking down the deserted hallways. Shadows bathed the academy’s tunnels with more depression, painting the doors of the surrounding dorm rooms (which housed other snoozing students) with hues of surveying obsidian.

He only continued, hands dug deep into the sanctuaries of his jean pockets, narrowed eyes locked onto the door at the end that would lead to the designated rooftop. He didn’t care about the punishments of wandering through the school halls at night, nor did he worry about getting caught, as her words had swept his mind away to a mesh of occupying thoughts. With a frown still glued to his lips, he put his arm out to push the swinging door away, granting him access to the ascending stairs that crawled upwards to the rooftop.

-ooo-

Coldness soon pranced across his skin, bringing his muscles to shiver as the endless boundaries of night were revealed to him. With a toughened posture he exited from the building, leaving the inside warmth behind him since he had emerged onto the rooftop of his school, the sounds of a living city sounding distant through the wails of the dying day.

He contemplated on continuing, as if he had sudden regret to meet with her at their designated rendezvous. The strongest urge of fear surged through his nerves at the possibilities of the meeting’s reason of request, or the idea that it was all a hoax set up by friends obsessed with childish pranks.

Then again, if such a hidden surprise existed, Odd wouldn’t be in bed and would instead be up there leading him into it.

Sighing through his nostrils, he stalked out into the cement pavement of the rooftop, narrowed eyes sailing across the darkened, isolated grounds, searching for her. His hands were still dug deep into his pockets, although they were prepared for retaliation in case someone were to pounce on him, or in case this was all a trap being performed by an enemy of the sort. He didn’t have the slightest idea of what this really was, and instead made his way to the railing that secured the contents of the roof, making extra sure that nothing slipped off the ledge of the high building. If it wasn’t for his obsessive vertigo he would’ve turned his head to eye the advancing night from beyond the school’s walled exterior.

“I thought you weren’t going to come.”

The sentence was short, yet contained a feminine tone that didn’t surprise him as the image of the owner leaked into his brain. He remained silent, lost within thoughts and a vortex of tragic conclusions – his worries for the reason behind this suspicious meeting – despite that he soon turned to face her as she emerged from the shadows that occupied the rooftops. His forest green eyes, which were still gaining a piercing glint from his narrowed lids, bore into her obsidian ones, silence befalling upon both of them as the winds of the night carried away the dying memory of her prior sentence.

“Did you think I wasn’t?”

His voice was casual, emotionless, lacking feeling beyond what she was expecting. His whole countenance surpassed her beliefs of his assumed first impression during one of the rare times when they were actually alone, although she wasn’t surprised that he had maintained such a firm posture to where it was obvious he was holding in the small inch of happiness that had deluged his muscles upon her arrival. He was always happy to see her, even if he didn’t show it often.

With her arm grasping the top part of her other, giving her a lost, dazed semblance, she slowly made her way over to the railing that traced the border line of the building’s ledge, immediately bringing her hands up to rest upon its metallic surface. All he did was watch her, eyebrow slightly quirked, confused on what was going on, and on the first mystery on why he had been invited to the rooftops of Kadic Academy at one in the morning. Nonetheless he crossed his arms, waiting patiently, which was quite out of character for him.

“We need to talk…” was all she could muster her strong tone to mutter, silently bringing her hand up to brush her obsidian hair behind her ear. Her matching eyes didn’t stutter to shift from the sight of the horizon to eye his bewildered, yet serious face, and instead remained focused on any spot away from his malachite gaze.

He shifted weight between his shoulders, slight nervousness beginning to form across his stomach’s churning line. Surprisingly, though, he had successfully refrained his voice from contorting into that of an upset squeak. “About what…?”

She sighed, taking in the cold air, shivering slightly as it froze the inside of her lungs, dubbing the following breath that blew out of her mouth with tints of visible frost. Her skin reflected the paleness that radiated from the towering moon, which slowly sailed across the night’s starry canvas, sending sprawls of silver across its celestial surface. Despite this, however, the two figures paid no heed to the celebration of beauty that was taking place among the sky, turning the floating clouds a deep purple with borderlines of swallowing ebony, like lone creatures sliding across an atmospheric ocean composed of dark water. Instead their focuses remained on each other, his expression displaying compassion, while hers had gained a determined tone similar to his past one.

“About us.”

The answer that had been spoken in almost an incoherent whisper shook him, draining feeling from his nerves and replacing them with regretful chills. He didn’t want to hear such a reply, as the cause behind it, he knew, would be because of him, even if he had been unaware of it. He knew he must’ve done something wrong, something of terrible attributes that it convinced her to talk about their implied relationship.

However, he refused to allow his worries to become noticeable, so he let out a short sigh before leaning forward to place his arms on the railing next to hers. Then, with what sounded like a pinch of nervousness, he muttered, “What about us?” His eyes slowly turned to her, his frown deepening at the glisten of worry that had grazed her Japanese-style facial features, dimming her obsidian orbs (if such a thing was even possible). It was obvious she was about as scared of the foreshadowed conclusion of the meeting as he was, although she was displaying symptoms of soon admitting a long-awaited confession.

“I…I don’t think we should be together.”

At that very moment his heart plummeted, falling through the tunnels within his body to the darkened abyss of loneliness and depression, sinking to the bottom where it was impossible to regain it in a few seconds flat. He stood there, his hand’s grip on the railing failing, as it soon fell limply to his side, his mouth gaping alongside it. She didn’t bother to turn to face him since the sound of shifting clothes and awkward silence had signified his sudden upset of the matter, and she could feel sympathy slowly overtaking her building thoughts. She knew that such a suggestion was going to affect him to the extent where she didn’t need seeable proof to know he was taking it hard.

“W-why…?” he muttered, stern voice now more quiet than before, matching his saddened countenance and the dimmed glow that surveyed from his eyes, paling his irises to a sickly chartreuse. Even a person of such a rough impression now sounded like tears were going to fall from his widened orbs.

He cared for her…heavily, as she did for him.

She turned her head away, mentally scowling at herself for hurting the person she loved with every fiber of her tall being, although she knew that such events had to take place – that such misery needed to be endured. They were both affected seriously by it, and while he felt like he wanted to jump over the edge, ending his worthless life right then and there, she felt like running away and never allowing anyone to care about her. She felt like she deserved to be alone, and the reason behind her choice was barely outmatching her urge to take it all back.

She wanted nothing but to be with him.

As if it was automatic, absentmindedly at most, or as if her muscles took over from there, she choked out between invisible tears, “We have to. Today, on Lyoko, you were almost killed, and when I saw this, my heart fell harder than it ever had when any of our other friends were mere seconds away from death. I…I can’t live with that.” She finally turned to look at him, her expression still depressed, although her obsidian eyes were now glossy from bottled tears. “Every time we fight Xana, every damn day, we’re all put into life-threatening situations. If you ever died I don’t know what I would do.”

He opened his mouth as if to object, but only left it hanging limply when she continued, eyes turned away from him. “I know our relationship has just started to flourish, and with every passing second I love you even more. I know, however, that this only means that if any of us died, we would be distracted, unable to help the others by the mere fact that our lover no longer exists. I don’t want to get attached to you; it would only mean I would miss you more if Xana took you away from me.”

His eyes were now close to leaking tears. “Are…are you trying to say that -”

She turned to look at him, her face a mixture of sadness and seriousness. “Yes. As long as we fight Xana, as long as our percentage of death is high because of our duty as Lyoko warriors, I don’t want to get attached to anyone. Until Xana is stopped I think we need to stay far away from each other when it comes to our feelings.”

He nearly stumbled back from her words, his chest inflating and deflating with quickened breath, his eyes glistening from slowly-forming tears, which seemed to dim them even more. At that very second he wanted to object with everything he had, he wanted to confirm her wrong and prove to her that their relationship meant nothing to the boundaries of Lyoko, but instead to their lives outside of the computer.

However, his thoughts collided with his feelings, bringing the truth of her words to the matter, on how if he or she died tomorrow, or even tonight, their mournful souls would be distracted, and therefore worthless to the acts of protecting the world from Xana. Not to mention that attachments would only add more despondency to the aftermaths of a lover’s tragedy.

In the end of his thoughts, behind the overwhelming urges of crying and retorting, one sentence struggled to emit from his gaped mouth.

“You…you think we’re never coming back, don’t you?”

For half a second her face displayed shock, as if her secret had been revealed against her own will. She quickly frowned in sadness, though, as such a statement was the truth. She was certain that sometime in the midst of their war with Xana, they would have to sacrifice themselves one way or another to save the world from its evil reign, like soldiers among an army ready to serve their country.

Ready to die for their country.

“This is who we are,” she eventually replied, eyes closed, obviously in denial to face him. “Lyoko warriors. That’s all that matters now.”

His eyes turned to the ground, darkening with visible sadness, the strong urge to refuse the depressing truth sprawling across his clenching hands and furrowing eyebrows. It was then and only then when he hated himself for being a hero, hating himself for choosing to save the world over being with the one girl he could ever love. He hated Xana for existing; he hated Franz Hopper for creating him; he hated fate for bringing him into a mess he was too young to be involved in.

He hated love for abandoning him.

He hated contribution for convincing him to protect the world.

He hated the idea that out of all the people among the planet, he was looked up to save its inhabitants from behind a veil of hidden presence - that he was the one forced to give up his life for the sake of humanity.

“I’m sorry,” she then muttered, voice squeaking alongside charging tears. He wanted to hold her…comfort her…but he couldn’t, and all because their fake lives had to play a big part on their real ones.

Before he could even reply, her hands had flown forward to grasp tightly onto his arms, pulling him upwards before her lips crashed into his. He struggled, confused by the sudden and unexpected kiss that he squirmed from her hold, although after realizing what was happening he relaxed, returning the same amount of passion that she was giving to him.

She soon pulled away, reluctantly letting go of his arms. Despite that the moment held quite a bit of romance, her eyes were still turned away from his widened, curious ones, and she only sighed again before turning her head to allow the connection of a compassionate gaze-lock to form between him and her. “I love you, Ulrich,” she then whispered behind dissipating happiness as she turned away and walked towards the exit off the rooftops. He only allowed his eyes, which had regained their forest green glow amongst the unexpected moment, to follow her as she disappeared behind the door to the descending stairs, as if he was never going to see her again.

He was aware that their job as heroes made fatal risks more probable to happen, and no doubly was survival in the end not guaranteed for all of them. Because of this he understood why she had made the choice for them not to get too attached to each other, although his feelings for her still haunted the place in his heart where they used to thrive.

However, he did know that if they did stop Xana then they could come back together.

But, like the obvious conclusion of their war among Lyoko, the sentence to sum it all up for their neglected love was still the same.

They weren’t coming back.

“I love you too, Yumi.”

-ooo-

That was fun.

Anyway, I hope it made sense. This was an attempt to add realistic angst to the pairing, although I guess I kinda made it anti because of it. Oh well, it still has implications, at least.

Well, that's all for now, and since I removed it from my profile to make it shorter, I'll add it here:

RIP Casey Calvert (Guitarist for Hawthorne Heights)