Smash Skits

Note: I do not own the Smash Brothers series or any characters from it. However, I do own this fic, and FINALLY my own copy of the game! Of that, I am happy at last!

This one's another gem of an idea from Dark Kyotoa! Prepare to be awe-struck!

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(Chapter 17: Legendary)

Diddy Kong, with banana peel in hand, was waiting for the right moment for Wario to slip up. Falco wasn't going to let this opportunity of stealing a kill go by his feathery person, so he intercepted the primate and caught the banana peel in his feathers before tossing it in the fat treasure hunter's face. This didn't really phase Wario in anyway, so he decided to let his stored-up weapon of destruction rip from his rear, sending himself skyrocketing, and leaving the birdman and monkey, literally breathless.

Since this was at the Pokemon Stadium (the Melee edition, that Master Hand had to beat Crazy Hand with in order to keep it), there wasn't a lot of room to run around or hide. Especially with the changing fields. So it wasn't easy for the great Solid Snake to hide, unnoticed, in his simple cardboard box. But since Diddy, Wario, and Falco were too intent on bashing each other in the skulls with giant flowers, this gave Snake the chance to blow his cover, reach for the Pokeball that had just spawned, and throw it in the midst of the others.

"Show me what you got, ball."

Out popped the tiny, pink legendary Pokemon, Mew. All four of them just stared at the pink Pokemon, hovering in place, letting out a 'Mew!' before flying away from the scene, dropping a CD onto the ground.

Falco was the first of them to break the awkward silence. "Okay... what the heck was dat?" Diddy followed up with some monkey noises, before the birdman picked up the CD. "Ah jeez... the Zorro-remix of the Star Wolf theme. Don't dat just beat all?"

"WAAHAHAHAHA!" The fat treasure hunter had walked away enough to pick up another conveniently placed Pokeball, and threw it at the others. "Now YOU eat this!"

Out popped the sprite-like, green Pokemon of time travel, Celebi. It cutely giggled in the way that it always does, grating on the nerves of the monkey, for some awkward reason. It then started flying all around, dropping one trophy after another, going faster and faster, until the entirety of the Grass field was covered in a horde of trophies the Smashers had all collected.

"Well, that's just stupid." Falco shook his head, but then harassed by Diddy, because he didn't want the birdman to take the Elite Beat Agents trophy that was there. "OKAY! GET OFF ME, YA FLEABAG!!"

After a good minute of hoarding their pockets with trophies (a record amount ever dropped by Celebi, that cheapskate), the monkey had picked up another Pokeball, got an evil glare in his eye, shrieked a frickin' monkey shriek, and threw the ball at them, this time making actual connection with the fat cheek of Wario!

"YEOW!!"

And out popped the child-like, wish legendary of steel, Jirachi. Being part-Psychic, it mentally spoke to all of them. "Your wishes will come true!"

"YES! I'm gonna be rich!!" Wario roared in delight.

Diddy clapped his hands excitedly, thinking of a two-story tall banana, Dixie, ice cream, and two spoons.

"I'm gonna get mah own series! That's awesome!" Falco cock-eyed the Pokemon.

"It'd be nice if Liquid would die now." Snake muttered.

"Your wish for more stickers has come true!" It spun around, and started flying all over the now-appeared Water field, dropping stickers all over the place.

Snake, however, reacted quickly to this. "No. That's not flying with me." He pulled out a rocket launcher, aimed it at the happily fleeing Pokemon, and let loose a rocket upside the back of its head. The onlookers (Wario, Diddy, and wide-beaked Falco) were just in shock of seeing Snake doing something out of character, like, say, attacking a cute little Pokemon.

"OWIES!" It was crying, and mad. "I'M LEAVING! DOOM DESIRE!!" And with that, a bright orb of light, supposing to be the Sun's impersonator, shined hard on them, and as Jirachi disappeared, the sunlight became a large beam of Steel power, unlike Solarbeam, nuking the entire arena, sending everyone flying.

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After the Doom Desire attack pretty much toasted the stage, everyone had to evacuate, leaving the four of them to walk back to the Mansion.

"Nice, goin', Snake." Falco shook some seared plumage off of his head. "I'm gonna be bald like a cooked turkey at this rate."

"I wasn't going to let it get away with leaving some crappy stickers!" Snake reconfirmed his beliefs. "Besides, I didn't pay much attention to Mei Ling's harping about me actually using firearms on the Pokemon."

"Why would she care?" Wario pointed out. "You fired your fancy missiles at Lucario in your last match."

"Yeah, but no one cares about Lucario--"

The monkey suddenly lept up and down, pointing at the parting of the clouds. A large, shining white Pokemon, almost ten feet tall, approached the four of them. It roared aloud, breaking Peach's window for little-to-no reason.

Immediately, Snake got on his Codec.

"Otacon!" He called. "What the heck is that thing?"

"Let me see, Snake... WHOA!" Otacon, on the other end, saw the mighty Pokemon overshadowing them. "That's Arceus!"

"Arceus?"

"It's called the Creation Pokemon." Otacon began what Snake called 'nerding it up'. "It is said that Arceus existed long before the universe even began, and it shaped the world with its thousand arms."

"Thousand arms?" Snake looked again. "It looks like a cybernetic techno-horse."

"You have to be careful, though, Snake. It is a Pokemon of many strengths! The Pokemon equivalent of God itself! It can change its own type depending on what Plate it has, making moves that match its type even more powerful! And you have to watch out for Judgment, its ultimate attack!"

"Got it, Otacon--"

"WOW! A NEW POKEMON! I'M SO getting that!!"

The Pokemon Trainer appeared out of nowhere, and, for no unknown reason, with a Master Ball in hand, he threw it at the mighty deity.

"I... am Arceus..." The being spoke to all of their minds. "I am the--" And it was interrupted by getting caught in the Master Ball. It started shaking.

"YEAH!" The Trainer was excited. "Just a few more shakes, and it'll be mine!"

"Hmm... That's gonna be unfair if he uses that thing in battle." Falco commented.

However, the ball started shaking harder, harder, and more violently, until the impossible happened, in the history of the Pokemon world!

...Arceus broke out of the now-made-useless Master Ball.

"WHAT?! NO! THIS CAN'T BE!!" The Pokemon Trainer protested. "THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!"

"SHUT!! UP!!" Falco cawwed loudly.

It's eyes glowed an angry red. "...Okay, which one of you assholes threw that at me?" Snake, Wario, Diddy, and Falco all pointed at the Trainer, who decided to raise his own hand. The deity started glowing violently. "I think I'll teach ALL OF YOU a lesson for trying to control the likes of ME! JUDGMENT!!"

A bright flash of white later...

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"Okay, let this be a lesson to you guys about trying to bring in a Pokemon NOT approved of by me." Master Hand shook itself up and down, looking at the severely injured forms of Snake, Wario, Diddy Kong, Falco, and the Pokemon Trainer. "And Arceus? Not cool... you don't get cheesecake this week."

The five of them groaned in anguish and defeat.