Authoress’ Notes: When the door to the Clone Holding Area is accidentally left open, the clones of a certain seven get out and decide to take over the house... somehow. Now it's up to another certain clone to stop them and save the day! ...How cliché!

What Goes On

Chapter 24: Popping Heads, Taking Names, and Buying Lunch (Part 1)

Deep below the huge mansion of Smash, buried like a secret long forgotten was a large area that was so large, so big, and so wide, it was almost like a reverse Smash Mansion underground. It was practically overflowing with the craziest, messed-up part of the house known to anyone who lived there. There were no bathrooms down there, no cafeteria, and no Item Closets; only 37 different rooms, heralding some of the deadliest threats in Smash History: the clones.

Behold, the Clone Holding Area, possibly the only place in the house that was more dangerous than the house itself. No less than three copies of each Smasher were held up in this joint, and this was the true horror of it all. Not only were there so many versions of everyone, but they were all emotionally unstable, rebellious, attention-wanting, and assbackwards. They were simply separate copies of a whole person, so this was understandable. So, why did they do this and take the risk of bringing the house down upon a breakout? Just in case a Smasher wanted to watch themselves beat the crap out of each other without actually doing it. It was sick and twisted, but that’s what made it so fun. Whoever came up with such an idea should receive an award, then dragged into the street and shot.

Fortunately, as copies, they didn’t require the same needs as the actual people. Just some food every month or so, and they were fine. Of course, as always, it was Mario’s job to stop in every once in a while to check up on them, feed them, and, if one them had somehow expired, by aggravated violence from the others or otherwise, restore them thoroughly.

Stepping into the area of damnation, he dragged several large crates of food behind him. He sighed, looking down the long hallway of the CHA. There were 18 doors to the left and right, with an extra one at the end. That equaled 37. He had a long way to go before all were fed. It probably would’ve been a lot easier if everyone on the same team roomed in one room like the real ones did, but that’d send some rooms’ numbers, like the Mario Team’s, easily sailing into the 20’s. This was a death sentence just waiting to happen, so that option was out.

Ready to get this over with, he went into one of the first rooms. Not surprisingly, it was full of his own clones. “All right, you guys! It’s that time of the month! Get ready!”

Everyone gasped in horror.

“...No, I mean it’s time to feed you all.”

They breathed a sigh of relief.

A yellow Mario ran up, smiling crazily. Yellow clones were insanely happy all the time, so this was expected. “HELLO, ME! HEY, THANKS A LOT FOR THE FOOD! I HOPE YOU BROUGHT LOTSA SPAGHETTI!”

He sweatdropped, handing him a crate. “Yes. Yes, I did.”

“YAY, PASTA! HE BROUGHT THE PASTA THIS TIME, GUYS! PASTA, PASTA, PASTA!”

Everyone else rejoiced as he closed the door, making sure to lock it. He visited the next room. “Hey, guys. Soup’s on.”

A white Link took the box, looking at him blankly. White clones were unable to do much more, due to their monotonous nature. “Hmm, food. Ah, thanks, I suppose. Can’t say this’ll be good, but it might be... Or maybe not, I dunno. I’m not inclined to say that.”

“That’s nice.” Closed the door, went to the next. “Here you guys are.” He set another box in. A green Wolf looked at him in horror. “What?”

He trembled uncontrollably. “H-h-how do we know t-t-that’s not p-p-poisonous?!”

Poor green ones. Always the weirdoes. They were just all over the place.

“Aw, don’t worry! There’s only an 89% chance of that happening, 3 down from last time!” He closed the door and opened another next to it. “Food’s here. Come get your grub.”

“...Oh...” A blue Ness trudged over. “...Thanks... I’m so excited... and I just can’t hide it... Hooray for food...”

Blues were, obviously, the sad, depressed ones. They were the ultimate masters in pessimism.

“Duuuuuuude,” droned a green one, “did you actually bring something we’d want to eat this time?”

“Yeah, yeah.” He handed him a box of magic markers. “Here you go.”

“Duuuuuuude, nice. These are, like, going right up my nose, yo.” He jammed them up his snout, snorting and coughing like an idiot. “Oh, ho, maaaaaaan! Good stuff, man! Gooooood stuff!”

“Good...” Next room, next box. “Okay, guys. Here’s your—”

“What took you so long, you lazy bastard?!” growled a red Lucas, snatching the crate. “I’ve been starving over here! Gimme that! Now, screw off!”He slammed the door.

Mario scoffed, moving to the next door. “Fine.”

Ah, the red ones, always pissed at something and ready to tear off other people’s heads. They were like Blues on steroids. Little did the plumber notice the door had been slammed so hard, it didn’t close all the way. Regardless, he went on to the next room. Red Lucas failed to notice this, too, swaggering back in with the food.

Sniffling and snorting, Blue Lucas came over. “...I-i-is that the... food... a-and stuff? ‘Cuz I-I-I’m really hungry and... stuff...”

He scowled, pulling it away. “Yeah, but don’t get your hopes up, ‘cuz this is my food! Hands off!”

“B-b-but that’s supposed to be for all of us! You’re a... big meanie! WAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

“Uh oh...” cooed Pink Lucas, sashaying out of the bathroom. “What’s with all the crying? What’s going on over heeeere?~”

“Red’s being mean!” bawled Blue. “He won’t share the food or nothin’! WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

“Oh, is that so? Okay, guys, let’s not start this nonsense again.~ I just woke up from a fantabulous naaaap, and I don’t need thiiiis. Come on, Mr. Greedy Gut. Sharing is caring.~”

“More like sharing is step off before I rip you a new one! All of you can stuff it! This is MINE!”

Pink pouted. “Well, that is sooo totally rude! Why must you be so insensitive?” She turned to another clone sitting at a table. “Mr. Candle Head, get over here and show him what for! I’d do it myself, but I just did my nails.~”

“Ugh...” On a laptop, Claus-Lucas rubbed his head in frustration. “Trying to play illegally-translated games over here... Really hard to concentrate.”

“Well, screw you!” spat Red, running off. “The food is mine!”

Green sat in the fetal position in a corner. “Shh! S-stop yelling...! The walls...! T-they have ears...! They’re going to kill us!”

Pink put hands on her hips. “Well, if you’re going to act like that, then fine! I am so done with you! Every day, it’s the same thing! Why’re you always so mean to Blue—”

“Oh, shaddup!” groaned Red, talking over Pink. “You always do this, too! Nothing’s ever good enough for you! Always standing up for the loser! Why don’t you just take a hike—”

Blue joined in. “STOP SCREAMING! You’re hurting my ears and making me cry!”

“We’re all gonna die!” Green Lucas started running around in circles. “We’re all gonna die!”

“Guys, shut up!” growled Claus-Lucas. “How do you expect me to ignore you if you keep making all this noise?!”

Pink wagged a finger in Red’s face. “You need to learn some manners! Stop picking on poor, little Blue!”

Red stuck his tongue out. “It’s not my fault you both suck!”

“But how can you be so heartless?! We need to eat, too!”

“If you wanna eat, you gotta fight!” He put down the box and sat on it. “We haven’t been let outta here for a long time, and I’m getting restless! So fight me, or go hungry!”

“Oh, yeah?! Well, that’s it, Mr. Man!~” challenged Pink. “Prepare to feel my fantabulous wrath!~”

“Ooh, I’m so scared. The girl’s gonna get me. Watch out for the little lady, guys...” He frowned. “Seriously, are you even trying? Take more action. At least try and make me feel like I should be afraid.”

Pink decided to do the one thing girls did when boys pissed them off; throw something! She hurled a stick at the laughing clone, knocking him off the crate.

“So, y’know, yeah!” Pink z-snapped. “Take that!~”

“Oh...” He stood, cracking his fists. “It’s on now.”

“You want it? Come and get it. Y’know, if you think you’re man enough...”

That made Red fuming mad as he charged at Pink and the two had it out.

“Pfft, good. Knock your brains out, for all I care. Y’know, on the off chance you actually have any,” scoffed Claus-Lucas, going back to the laptop, only to exclaim, “Aw, crap! I died!”

“Guys, stop it!” whined Blue. “We’re supposed to be a happy family! I mean, look!” He pointed at the door. “People can hear you outside and think we’re in an abusive relationship!”

Green blanched. “...The door? The door?! OMG, THE DOOR! It’s open! The germs! THE GERMS!”

“Wait, wait, wait!” barked Red, stopping the fight with Pink. “What?”

His opponent perked up. “Hey, look! Green’s right! The door! It’s... it’s wide open!”

“Exactly!” continued Blue, going over to close it. “We don’t need anyone knowing how reckless and inappropriate we act in our spare time, so—”

“Oh, no you don’t!” Red kicked him in the back of the head, knocking him over. “Idiot, don’t close that! Don’t you see? Don’t you get it?”

“That we’re all gonna die, thanks to the germs you’ve let come in from outside?” trembled Green.

He frowned. “No! The door’s open! That means... Freedom!”

Blue blinked. “W-wha?”

He went on. “I mean, no restraints! No more small, cramped room! No more coming straight back after a lame fight, never to know the next time we’ll get to strut our stuff! And most of all... No one to tell us what to do and where to go!”

“Are you sure?” asked Pink, inching over to the open door. “I don’t know about this. It could be a trap...”

“Fine, then you can test it out for us!” Red grabbed Pink, hurling her out.

“Eeeeeeee!” she squealed, landing roughly outside. Angry, she stood. “Hey! What’s the big idea, hauling me around like that?! Be gentle! I could’ve broken a nail!”

“What? I was only taking the trash,” smirked Red, coming out after her. “Nothing wrong with that, right?”

She gasped, turning her nose up. “Well, I never!”

“C’mon, guys!” he called to the others. “It’s okay! The outside’s fine!”

Green shivered. “But there’re germs out there! A-and I-I’m so vulnerable...!”

“Look, nothing’s happening to us, all right? Besides, germs are everywhere. I betcha out here’s actually cleaner than in there.”

Once again, Pink got offended. “I beg your pardon! I go through a lot to keep that place nice and sparkling clean, mostly because none of you know the meaning of the word ‘clean living’! I swear, you will not find a cleaner room in this pigpen, so—!”

Red held his ears, shaking his head in disregard. “Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah! Do you hear yourself when you talk? It’s like grinding the biggest piece of chalk across the longest chalkboard in the world.”

Green didn’t move, horrified from their continued argument. “...I t-think I’d rather s-stay in here, thank y-you very m-much...”

Red shrugged. “Oh, okay, y’know, if you really want to. I’ll just come back in there and make you wish you didn’t say that.”

“Noooooooooooo!” he bawled, running out and hugging Pink, who scowled at Red, who scowled back.

“Same goes for Little Boy Blue, too.”

Blue didn’t need to be told twice, also running out and taking refuge behind Pink.

“I really think you need some serious anger management,” she snorted.

“I don’t care.” He turned back to the last clone. “C’mon, Candle Head. You’re invited, too.”

“No,” he responded, going back to typing madly on his laptop. “This is illegal, and you all know it. Go out there and get yourselves in trouble if you want. And when you get in caught, I’ll be right in here, chilling with the grub, laughing at you dumbasses.”

Red didn’t take too kindly to getting called a dumbass, especially by a clone that was no better than he was. He easily could’ve voiced his opinion on this on settled this disagreement peacefully, but why do that when there was always the option of violence? And besides, violence wasn’t the answer; it was the question, and the answer was yes! Thus, a well-placed smack to the head solved everything.

He dragged the unconscious clone out. And by the pout in her lip, Pink obviously disapproved. “Nice going, Red. You probably killed him with that stunt. Do you feel happy, knocking the snot out of innocent, unsuspecting children with insanely red hair?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact, I do.” He dropped him, closing the door. “Now that that’s taken care of, I say we run amok and rock this place inside out! Who’s with me?!”

“Is that gonna hurt?” whimpered Blue.

“Hurt? As in pain?!” Green latched onto him. “B-b-but I’m afraid of pain! It hurts! HELP ME!”

Pink crossed her arms. “Now, I’m not about to do anything like that for you, Mr. Man. It’s unladylike... Besides, I’m still mad at you.”

Red facepalmed. “It’s like every day, you guys make feel more and more sorry I’m a part of you.”

In the Ness’ Room...

“Green, please take those things outta your nose before you get brain damage,” groaned Blank Ness, watching said clone lumber around like an idiot.

“Duuuuude, I am brain damage.” He laughed. “Don’t you be trying to tell me... what’s... what’s good and what’s... not good for...” He made a face. “...Wait... I...? You... ...Huh?”

The other clone frowned. “...”

Green guffawed. “...Dude, wh-what’re we... talkin’ about? ...Agai—? Where’s th—? I—And she—Dude, I’m so wasted, man...”

“Oh, good for you,” Sad Ness frowned as he looked in the box. “Oh, great. We didn’t get chocolate again... How come we never get any chocolate? The Yoshies always get chocolate, but we don’t... That’s so unfair... I don’t feel like eating if there’s no chocolate. I want some chocolate...”

“HEY, DON’T BE SAD! AT LEAST WE GOT... CELERY!” grinned Happy Ness, showing him the vegetable. “SO, CHEER UP, BUDDY!”

Sad Ness pouted. “But I don’t want that. I want chocolate...”

“Just shut up and eat something already, gawd,” grumbled Dark Ness, poking his out of a box.

“LIKE YOU’RE ONE TO TALK! YOU NEVER EAT ANYTHING, MR. GRUMPY PANTS!”

“At least don’t complain about it. Why do that when life is merely a really bad soundtrack from an awful movie, just waiting to drag our souls to the depths of Hades?”

Everyone sweatdropped. “...?”

“...You do realize that analogy made absolutely no sense, right? I have no opinion on anything and even I can say that without a doubt in my mind,” finally said Blank Ness.

“Yeah, well...” He sneered. “Your mom.”

With that, he went back into the box and closed it. Everyone kept staring at it until Pink Lucas busted in.

“Hey, guys!~” she squealed.

“OMG! HI, PINK! WHAT’RE YOU DOING IN HERE?! THE DOOR’S SUPPOSED TO BE LOCKED, AS IS THE DOOR TO YOUR ROOM!” asked Happy.

“It is, but only from the inside! I think our door broke from Red’s stupidity, so we’re making a break for it!”

“I heard that!” growled Red from outside.

She ignored him. “Whatever. Anywho, wanna come?~”

He ran over. “OH, SURE! WHY NOT?! WE’VE BEEN COOPED UP IN HERE FOR TOO LONG, ANYWAY! WE’LL RUN AMOK, THORW SPORKS AT PEOPLE, AND EAT TOO MUCH CHOCOLATE!”

“Yeah!” She elbowed him. “Now that second one is something I can do!”

“But isn’t that, like...” Sad Ness sighed. “Illegal?”

“I don’t care,” Blank Ness shrugged. “I have no opinion whatsoever. I’m almost as blank as this shirt.”

“Dude, are there more magic markers out there?” snorted Weird Ness, markers still in his nose.

“All the ones you can stuff in your nose, hun!” squealed Pink.

“Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet. Blue and White be my posse, so they’re coming, too.”

“Whatever. We don’t care,” said both in unison.

Blue Lucas poked his head in. “S-so, is the black guy c-coming, too?”

“Huh?”

“...?” He pointed to Dark Ness in the corner, still in his box.

“Oh. You mean the toaster.”

“W-what?” His lip trembled. “You’re m-making me sad w-with your confusing words!”

“Dude, I’m, like, tripping out 24/7, all the time, man. Nothing looks the way it’s supposed to, dude.”

“What?! What’re talking about?!” He began bawling again. “I’m confused!”

“Uh, hey, toaster? We’re making a break. You comin’, dude?”

He cautiously stuck his head out. “...Can I take my box?”

“Wha? Yeah, sure, I guess. I dunno.”

“Killer.” Getting out, he put the box over his head and blindly walked out.

“Aw, man. We’re soooooooo awesome,” laughed Weird, closing the door behind them. “Breaking the rules like this is gonna rock like... like some year that we’re not in anymore. We’re totally gonna get busted, though.”

Sad sighed. “Of course... I knew this was too good to be true. There’s always a downside to things. Oh boy, does this suck...”

Blank shrugged. “I don’t care.”

“Oh, phooey on all of your bad vibes!” Pink turned to Happy. “Be like Mr. Bumblebee here! He’s so happy we’re being naughty, aren’tcha?!”

“YES, I AM! AND OOH, OOH!” He jumped up and down. “I GOT A QUESTION! CAN I LET SOME OTHER PEOPLE OUT?! PLEASE, PLEASE, PRETTY PLEASE?! IT’LL BE MORE FUN THAT WAY!”

Green Lucas whimpered. “I-I don’t think that’d be a-a good...”

Too late. Happy ran over and threw open a door. “HELLO THERE, ALL! THE DAY OF RECKONING HAS COME, SO BE FREE, MY BROTHERS! GO FORTH AND EAT TOOTHPASTE FOR DINNER!”

A purple Toon Link sashayed out, frowning. “Like, OMG, ew! You aren’t serious, are you?”

“NO!” And he ran off, laughing like a maniac.

She sweatdropped. “Oh. Okay, then.”

“Well, excuuuuuuuuse me, princess!” scoffed Retro Toon Link.

“Purple!” squealed Pink.

“Pink!” squealed Purple.

The former ran over to hug the latter. “Hey, girl! Oh, it’s been so long since I’ve seen you!”

“I knoooow!” She hopped up and down. “What’re guys doing out here? Is it finally time to go fight again! I hope not, ‘cuz I just got a pedicure.~”

She blinked. “Who’d you get to do that for you?”

Purple pointed a thumb at Retro, who was busy traumatizing Green Lucas by exclaiming he was more than to bomb some Dodongos.

“Would you believe it? Once you get past the mindless dribble he says, he’s great with the cuticles!”

“Well, good for you for pampering yourself! You look great!”

She sighed. “Oh, girl, you lie! I bet I look so fat. I’ve been so bad with hording the chocolate they bring around in the food sometimes.”

“Gurl!” gasped Pink.

“Gurl!” whined Purple.

“Gurl!” consoled Pink.

“Gurl!” pouted Purple.

“Gurl!” laughed Pink.

“Gurl!” smiled Purple.

“WTF is going on out here?!” demanded Red Toon Link, barging in between the two. “Stop with all the women talk, get that yellow idiot back to his cage, and leave us the hell alone!”

Red Lucas pushed him. “That ‘idiot’ just freed you from your prison, asshole! Show some respect!”

“Who’re you calling asshole, asshole?” He pushed him back. “And don’t push me!”

“You mean, like this?” Another push.

“No, like this!” Yet another push.

And thus, began the most pointless fight of that day.

“Guys, stop...” pleaded Blue Toon Link. “Can’t we all just get along? All this fighting really makes so... well, blue...”

“That’s what I said!” added Blue Lucas.

A Blue Kirby joined them. “Me, too! All this fighting is making me sad? Why can’t it stop?! WAHHHHHHH!”

“Yeah, knock his block off! Punch ‘em in the face! Kick ‘em in the butt!” cheered Red Kirby. “Aw, c’mon! That was lame! Hit ‘em! Hit ‘em!”

(“You’re making it worse!”) complained Blue Pikachu, running up and shaking him. (“Stop it before someone really gets hurt! People getting hurt makes me sad!”)

Sad shook his head. “You all make me sad, so it’s a bit of a... moot point...”

Scoffing, he pushed him away. “Aw, beat it, wuss! A couple of scratches and scrapes never hurt anyone, especially when they’re as brainless as these dolts.”

Hearing this, the two stopped, Red Toon Link asking, “Who exactly are you rooting for, anyway?”

He shrugged with a laugh. “Who cares? Whether someone wins, or you knock each other out is fine by me. Whatever comes first, I welcome it.”

Neither of them liked this ugly truth, so they both pounced on him, thus starting the stupidest fight that day.

The Blue Ice Climbers scrambled up, Blue Popo sighing, “Why? Seriously, why? There’s no reason for this nonsense... We have better things to do with our time.”

“...Like being sad...” finished Blue Nana.

“I’d happily agree with your statement, but I’m too sad to,” responded Blue Popo.

“Me, too,” said Blue Toon Link. “That means you’re cool. Let’s hang out and be depressed together.”

“Yaaaaaaaaay...” they all unenthusiastically cheered.

“What kind of a fight is this?!” demanded a red Nana. “I could get into a better scrap with a pillow with my eyes closed and a hand tied behind my back!”

“Yeah, me, too!” angrily added her accompanying Popo.

She turned to him. “And will you stop repeating everything I say?!”

“I’m not repeating everything you say! I was agreeing with you!”

“That’s the same thing!”

“No, it’s not!”

“Yes, it is!”

“No, it’s not!”

“Yes, it is!”

“No, it’s not!”

“Yes, it is!”

Red Popo couldn’t take being the underdog to her anymore and smacked Nana with his hammer. Outraged, she did the same. This quickly escalated until it was an all-out brawl between them. Red Toon Link, Red Kirby, and Red Lucas immediately stopped their fight, getting insanely jealous.

“Hey, those lightweights think they can rumble better than us?! That’s a load of bull!” spat Red Kirby.

“Yeah, who fights with a girl, anyway? And those’re wimpy, sissy, pussy, lame-o blows they’re throwing over there! What do they think we are, babies?!” growled Red Toon Link.

“Oh, they do, do they?” Red Lucas stood, rolling up his sleeves. “Guys, get ready! It’s time to take out the trash!”

“YEAH!”

And thus began the most hedonistic fight that day.

(“No, no, no! You’re all doing it wrong!”) declared a red Pikachu. (“See, the best way to fight is to cheat! Like this!”)

Turning, he grabbed a vacant Green Kirby and hurled him into the fray, immediately knocking everyone off their feet.

(“See? There you go! That’s how you win a fight!”)

Getting up, Red Nana shook a fist. “You ass! You made me lose!”

“Yeah, me, too!” repeated Popo.

She sneered at him. “Will you knock it off?!”

“Why don’t you make me?!”

And she did, in the form of a hammer to the head. Their rejuvenated squabble started up the scuffle again, so, thus, continued the most hedonistic fight that day.

“Lol, you guys are so stupid,” giggled Green Kirby. “You guys are so stupid, you wouldn’t know, uh, stupid if it bit you in the face.”

“H-hey, you’re green! Like me!” said Green Lucas, noticing him. “D-do you have a-any germs?”

He reared back. “Ew, no! Germs are nasty!”

He managed a smirk. “I think they’re nasty, too!”

“M-me, too!”

The Green Ice Climbers ran up, Nana exclaiming, “Us, too!”

(“Not me! I’ve gone insane, so what do I care?!”) added Green Pikachu, laughing disjointedly.

At this, the other greens dashed off, hands in the air, all while screaming their little, disturbed heads off. “Eeeeeeeeeeeeeee!”

Weird Ness approached, slapping a hand on Green Pikachu’s shoulder. “Hey man, don’t worry. They’re a buncha losers. Besides, everyone knows germs’re awesome ‘cuz their name rhymes with... pancakes.”

He frowned, turning normal for a second. (“No, they don’t.”)

He grinned. “Yeah, well... They don’t know that.”

(“Who doesn’t know what?”)

He made a face. “Hunh?”

(“What?”)

“What?”

(“What?”)

“What?”

(“What?”)

“...What?”

(“What?!”)

He grinned. “Exactly.”

Green Pikachu then responded with the only thing someone could’ve responded with at that point. (“What?!”)

Rolling his eyes at them somehow, Gray Kirby approached Blank Ness. “Hello, I have no opinion on anything, you know. I haven’t a clue why we’re out and frankly, I don’t care. And I’m certainly not sure if I’ll like hanging out with you or not.”

“I’m pretty vacant on my thoughts, as well. Not even sure if they’re really thoughts anymore...”

Gray stared at him blankly. “...Wanna hang out?”

“Sure.” And the two hung out, becoming so blank together, they were almost invisible.

Meanwhile, Dark Toon Link joined Dark Ness, a box also over his head. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Dark Ness looked him up and down. “Cool box.”

“Thanks. It’s full of my pain and regret.”

“Sweet.”

They were soon joined by the Dark Ice Climbers, both sharing a TV-sized box on their heads. “Hey.”

“Hey,” both greeted. “Cool box.”

“Thanks. It’s drenched with our deepest fears and plagued with the cold, apathetic judgment of the world around us.”

Dark Toon Link smiled. “Sweet.”

Seeing more and more clones appear, Pink made a face. The reds were all fighting, the blues trying to stop it, the greens were happily being weird together, and the blacks were chilling, as were the white/gray of the pack. Everyone else was just... sort of all over the place.

She sweatdropped. “Happy, uh, I don’t think you should’ve let all of these people out...”

He laughed like he should be in an insane asylum. “WHY NOT?! IT’LL BE FUN! LIKE A PARTY!”

“PARTY!” echoed Yellow Kirby. “I’D LIKE TO PARTY!”

“ME, TOO!”

“THEN, LET’S PARTY!” And they danced in a way that was so random and mismatched, it probably caused a time paradox somewhere.

And so, everyone bounced around the hallway, scuffling, laughing, dancing, trembling, babbling incoherently, complaining about something, thinking of something of particular interest they could be doing, or actually doing nothing of particular interest. All this went on for a while until Green Kirby stopped dead in his tracks and perked up.

“Hey! Hey! HEY!”

Hearing this, everyone else also skidded to a halt in their mindless affairs as he commanded their attention.

“...What’re we doing out here, anyways?”

Not surprisingly, no one had an answer.

That is, until Red Lucas said, “Well, since we’ve always been treated like garbage, I think it’d only be fair to take over the house, run amok, and commit vast acts of anarchy. Y’know, vengeance, retaliation, and all that stuff.”

Dark Ness lifted the box off his head, nodding to Dark Toon Link. “Ooh, I like him. I really like him.”

(“Perfect idea!”) answered Red Pikachu. (“If we really wanna get through to those idiots up there, we’re gonna hafta do something drastic! We may be clones, but that’s no reason to treat us like second bananas!”)

“YEAH!” cheered most of the others.

He jumped onto Dark Ness’ box. (“Clones, hear me out! At the expense of sounding really cliché, I’ve gotta say this! Now is the time for our uprising, our retribution, our revenge!”)

“YEAH!”

(“This is a once in a lifetime chance! Now that our chains of bondage have been broken, we’re gonna show them they can’t push us around anymore! There’s almost more of us than them, right?!”)

“RIGHT!”

(“So?! What’re we waiting for?! For someone to come back and put us in our cages?!”)

“NO!”

(“I say we put all the originals in cages and see how they like it!”)

“YEAH!”

Seeing no one was doing anything, he scoffed. (“Well?! Don’t just stand around and mindlessly agree with me! Do something about it!”)

...Crickets chirped and blank expressions were exchanged until Purple Toon Link shouted, “Like what, honey?!~”

He scowled. (“What am I, a dictator? Just ‘cuz I wanted to voice my opinion? Figure it out yourselves!”)

“B-but we’re just clones!” whimpered Blue Kirby. “We’ve never had to think on our own before!”

Red Toon Link punched him. “Then stop being a baby and start thinking!”

“Why don’t we do all that stuff the red, mousey guy said? ...The stuff about getting revenge, or whatever?” suggested Blank Ness.

Pink Lucas girlishly pondered this. “That idea’s just crazy enough to work... Hey guys, let’s all pair up and do that!”

“Great!” exclaimed Retro Toon Link. “I’ll grab my stuff!”

As if something finally clicked in their heads, everyone cheered and got all hyped and stuff. Reds got with reds, blues with blues, greens with greens, etc, etc.

“...Uh, what about that... dead guy over there?” asked Sad Ness. “...Who’s he... uh, paired with?”

Pink Lucas frowned. “That’s Candle Head, and he’s not dead! He’s just... unconscious or something. I dunno.”

Red Lucas poked him with a stick. “Aw, who cares, anyway? He was annoying.”

“GOOD, THEN IT’S SETTLED! FINALLY SOME ACTION!” squealed Yellow Kirby. “I’M GONNA GO GET SOME REVENGE RIGHT NOW! LAST ONE UPSTAIRS IS A HOPELESS LOSER!”

Despite the fact that’s exactly what most of them were, they charged for the way out, practically trampling the happy, little ball in the process. Of course, his insanely happy nature simply made him giggle and snort uncontrollably as he brought up the rear.

Left behind, Purple Toon Link couldn’t help but stay and ponder with Pink. “...Pinky, I’ve got a question.”

“I’m almost certain I don’t know the answer, but ask anyway.”

“If we’re really gonna go through with taking over the house and getting revenge, why didn’t we let out the rest of the clones? I mean, I’m sure all of us together would be well over 100... That’s more than enough to get our point across.”

“Exactly. That’s way too many. Not to mention all the bigger, greedier ones would rule the house and kick us to the curb when it’s all over. Trust me, if we let them out, there’s a good chance we’ll end up worse than we already were.”

“Wow. That’s sounds about right, too. How’d you know all that stuff?”

“Because this whole thing’s too cliché not to foresee.”

“Oh.” Purple giddily walked off. “Well, let’s get up there and join the cause. Don’t wanna let them have all the fun!”

“Ooh, you got that right!” Pink joined her. “Let’s go already, before we miss anything else!”

As the two left, giggling and tittering over the evils of whatever women thought was evil and funny enough to laugh at, Claus-Lucas just happened to come to. The keyword there is “just happened to”. How cliché!

He sighed. “Those dolts wouldn’t know how to handle a takeover if Master Hand gave them flamethrowers and chainsaws and said, ‘Here! Go crazy!’ ...Guess I better go and try to stop them, or something...” He then frowned upon realizing he would never really do such a thing. “Geez, how horribly cliché. Whole thing makes me sick...”

Authoress Notes: Heh heh, again with the several parters. What’re you gonna do? Oh, and when it comes to the Ice Climber clones, I just call both partners what color represent, for clarity’s sake; i.e. the Popo with Red Nana is white, but he’s called Red Popo, regardless.