Author: xpancake PM
-Minutemen- The former Minutemen think about their illogical adventures involving a black hole and a few other oddities. Then again, who said reality had to make sense?Rated: Fiction T - English - Parody - Words: 847 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 1 - Published: 03-18-08 - Status: Complete - id: 4139651
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
D/C: I do not own Minutemen, the characters, etc.
"Charlie." The short genius looked at Zeke from his position on Virgil's couch after hearing his name. The trio was currently very tired. They had just spent the past two days tearing apart the time machine to ensure that nobody ever did what they did and put the world in jeopardy, again. It took much longer than expected, what with the fact they had to take it apart, fully delete the program, scatter the evidence, and return the various stolen appliances. "How the hell did we survive a black hole?"
Charlie shrugged. "How should I know?"
Virgil rolled his eyes. "You're the genius here, you tell us."
Charlie pondered this a moment. "To be perfectly honest, I have no idea."
"Shouldn't we have died?" The two blonds glanced at Zeke, who was currently sprawled across one of the couches in Virgil's living room. "I mean, doesn't stuff get destroyed if it enters a black hole?"
Charlie sat up in the seat he was formerly lying on. Ironically enough, the three boys were in the same seats they were when they first held a meeting to discuss whether Zeke would help them build the time machine. "Actually, before the object passes the outer edge of the black hole, time seems to slow. As the object reaches the singularity of the black hole, the atoms and subatomic particles of the object tear away from each other. However, from a distant observer, the object never seems to cross the outer edge. Instead, they just see the object fade to nothing due to the distortion caused by the large force of the gravitational field found in black holes."
Virgil merely shook his head. "Huh?"
Zeke rolled his eyes. "He basically said that as you reach the center of the black hole, you get ripped to shreds." He smirked as Virgil seemed to shrink at that statement. "Hey, some people would like to die that way." At this, Virgil grimaced.
Charlie nodded. "He's right, we should have died. I'm guessing that with all our time travel and distortion of the space time continuum, we altered the gravity field of the resulting black hole so that it did not have the same intensity as those found in space. It would result in a dangerous one, but not in the same way as those studied by astronomers."
Again Virgil shook his head and said "Huh?"
"We got lucky." Charlie glared at Zeke for his short, yet accurate, summary of how they survived.
"Another thing, how did all the teachers in the teacher's lounge not notice we were stealing their microwave?" Charlie and Zeke had no response to Virgil's question, mainly because they really had no idea and just assumed the faculty was a group of oblivious idiots.
"In addition, why were our coats not covered in icicles after leaving the vortex while when some people threw Albert Felinestein in," Charlie chose this moment to glare at the two other boys. "he was completely covered in them."
Virgil stood up. "You know what guys?" The two other boys looked up. "There's probably a lot of detail relating to that adventure that we probably will never understand. Instead of thinking back to the past events, let's think about the future. It's our senior year, and as good friends, let's enjoy it. Who's with me?" He held his hands out as a gesture for a high five.
Zeke smirked. "What if we're antitranscendentalists?" Charlie snickered and Virgil just glared at the former loner, guessing that was either an insult or sarcasm.
Zeke smiled. "I'm kidding." He met Virgil's hand in the high five. "That sounds good." Charlie smiled and also met Virgil's hand in the high five gesture. Virgil grinned and sat back down in the empty seat.
"Cool! But there is one thing I don't get." The other two boys looked at Virgil. "If you were what, 9, how were you planning to drive a rocket cart to school?"
At this statement, the room went silent; Charlie had no answer to this question.
Zeke gave them a crooked smile. "There's some things we'll never know."
Charlie nodded. "Exactly. For example, we will never know exactly what occurs past the outer edge of a black hole's gravitation field. Most of what we know is theory, but since no evidence exists that could explain what hap-"
"Shut up Charlie." Charlie glared at both boys because of the synchronized interruption. After a few moments, the trio laughed it off and relaxed, ready for the rest of senior year, screw-ups and all.
Pancake: I was inspired to write this after thinking about the difference between what science defines a black hole as and the black hole from the movie. While I used Willing Suspension of Disbelief while watching it, I thought about it afterwards, and it led to this. Anyways, review with criticism and commentary and such.