Author: dstrekharrylover PM
Harry returns to Ginny after the second wizarding war with an unpleasant secret which will affect all concerned for months to come. Post-DH AU. HHr at first, ends up HG.Rated: Fiction T - English - Drama/Romance - Harry P. & Ginny W. - Chapters: 12 - Words: 21,716 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 04-19-08 - Published: 03-26-08 - Status: Complete - id: 4158209
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Ginny was stunned, her face virtually devoid of colour as they sat by the pond at the Burrow, Harry's shocking revelation just beginning to sink in. "You're what?"
"I'm going to be a … father," he quietly confessed. "'Mione … she got pregnant while we were out searching for Horcruxes a few months ago."
Ginny recalled that Harry had broken up with her shortly before the Trio had left on their quest, and so—at least technically—didn't have to answer to her for his conduct. But that was beside the point. The point was, she'd never stopped loving him and had always assumed he would return and resume their relationship, because their breakup had (supposedly) been simply to keep her safe: or so he'd said. But now … Knowing how insufferably noble Harry was, he would likely decide to "make an honest woman" of Hermione since they had not been married at the time she had become pregnant.
"But … what about Ron? I thought he and 'Mione were …"
"They had another fight, she came to me for comfort, and it … just got totally out of hand. I'm sorry, Gin … but you know what I have to do."
"Oh, yes, I know," she returned bitterly. "For all I know, you've wanted to shag her all along and were just using me until you could manage to get her alone long enough." Ginny's pain and bitterness was palpable, and in spite of himself Harry felt shame and regret at how much this was hurting her—but it was best that she get the news straight from him or else she'd be hurt even more.
"I'm truly sorry to have to hurt you, Gin," he returned quietly, his heart aching for her pain but knowing there was little he could do to ease it, especially since he had been the one to cause it in the first place. "And for your information, I never used you. I cared deeply for you; you have to know that. Those weeks with you were like something out of another life, like literally living the most beautiful dream ever. You made me the happiest I'd ever been and I'll never forget what we've shared, not for as long as I live. What I told you about my feelings was true, every word of it. I couldn't let Voldemort get hold of you, couldn't let you accompany us, because he would have used you against me, just as surely as the sun rises and sets. And I'll never stop caring for you. Never." His last word had special emphasis, and she knew he meant it.
Even at that, his words couldn't take away her pain. Not now, not ever. They had never gone all the way, simply held several passionate snogging sessions, and she had felt his arousal many times as he held her—but somehow, for some unexplainable reason, Harry couldn't bring himself to take that final step with her … and yet, he had managed to do so with Hermione, even if it had supposedly been unintentional. Well, unintentional or not, it was done now—and everyone concerned had to live with the consequences, as painful as they would surely be, especially for her.
"But you're marrying her. You managed to go all the way with her and never did with me. What's more, despite your claims, you couldn't have wanted to stop it, at least not consciously, or else you'd have found a way to do it." She turned away from him, her arms crossed and her hands clutching tightly, her throat aching from the tears she was holding back. "Didn't you think of me at all while you were shagging her? Did you think for even one moment of how I might feel if I'd found out what you did?" she bit out, her voice quiet but full of anguish. "Obviously not. Your bloody hormones got the best of you, and all you were thinking about was shagging, not the potential heartbreak your actions might cause."
"For Merlin's sake, Gin, surely you know I didn't cold-bloodedly plan this. It was an accident, pure and simple. Even Contraceptive Charms aren't 100 foolproof."
"Especially when you don't bother to use them," Ginny returned ruefully, remembering Hermione's own shocking revelation and profuse apology even as she forced out an equally bitter laugh. "I can imagine how Ron must have felt when he heard." She sighed sadly. "Well, I suppose I can't stop you. But don't expect me to like the idea—and most importantly, don't expect me to be a part of it. It would hurt too much, knowing you belong to someone else. Especially her.
"Hermione Granger the brain, who always got everything I ever wanted—and now she's getting the man I love as well." She began to walk away, every swallow painful even as her eyes brimmed with tears. For so many years she had hoped, dreamed, prayed that Harry would belong to her one day … but in the end, the one she loved most had betrayed her. She supposed she couldn't blame him, but that knowledge didn't make it hurt any less. "Oh well, I suppose I should have expected this at some point, since the two of you have always spent so much time together. Nor could I have retained any respect for your integrity if you didn't take responsibility for the child."
"Gin, please, don't let it end this way. If I had a choice, I'd take it back in a minute," Harry insisted.
Ginny whirled on him. "No, you wouldn't. You wouldn't do anything to hurt Hermione. Not your friend. Your bloody friend who's going to have your baby! Never mind your best friend's tagalong little sister's silly crush on you that turned into love. That's no longer important … if it ever truly was. Goodbye, Harry. I wish you every happiness. You deserve it. I just wish that it could be me giving you that happiness." That was as much as Ginny could force out before the tears started coming thick and fast and she had to get away from him but quick, before she made a total arse of herself. With that, she fled before she could do anything else, soon leaving him behind, just as he had once left her behind. "I've got to go now, get on with the rest of my life—or more precisely, what's left of it."
"Gin! No! Come back! Gin!" She forced herself to ignore the pleading in his voice and dashed into the house, then up to her room, the astonished faces of her family mere blurs as she ran past, blinded by tears that just wouldn't stop and pain that seemed unceasing. Once inside her room, she warded the door shut and placed a Silencing Charm on it so she could be alone in her misery, and no one would disturb her—least of all, Harry sodding Potter!
Ginny then threw herself on her bed and allowed her terrible grief, the horrendous, almost unbearable pain inside her almost literally tearing her apart, to take possession of her, the tears soaking her pillow even as she was unsure if she would ever leave her room again, much less ever have any kind of life again. As soon as she could manage to think clearly again, she would start making plans for the rest of her life … a life without her heart, no, her very soul. A life—no, an existence—without Harry.
Even as he ran after Ginny, Harry knew he'd just been the biggest, most unthinking and insensitive prat who had ever lived. Gin had needed to know what he'd told her, but he didn't have to just blurt it out like that. He should have done it more diplomatically, but frankly didn't see any way he could have. Just the same, he couldn't let it end like this, with bad feelings between himself and Ginny. They had shared far too much together for that.
And come to think of it, why hadn't they ever gone all the way? Certainly not for his lack of wanting to, that was for sure! But instead, his first time had been with the girl his best mate loved and the one he had always thought of as the sister he'd never had … at least until three months ago. Even at that, there was more he needed to say—and couldn't take No for an answer. He pressed a note into Molly's hand: Molly, I must speak privately with Ginny. Please see that we are not disturbed. She opened and read it, then smiled. With that, Harry followed Ginny upstairs to the third floor landing where her room was.
He realised the charms she'd placed on her door and couldn't let them stop him. Besides, he knew how to counteract them. She'd obviously forgotten that. After doing so, he entered the room and Ginny all but screamed, "Get out, you bloody bastard!"
"Not until you listen to me," Harry shot back.
"I don't care to listen to anything you have to say," she raged through her tears. "So if you value your ruddy bits, you'll make yourself scarce and never darken my door again!"
"Then I'll Apparate," Harry returned calmly. "You didn't let me finish before."
"I think you've made yourself all too clear, Harry. Now I suggest you leave before you get a Bat-Bogey Hex between the eyes!"
"I'll take my chances. I intend to get through to you, whatever I have to do." With that, he warded the door himself, then cast a Silencing Charm of his own before returning his attention to Ginny, moving to pin her to the bed with his hands and body, making sure that she would be unable to hit him in a vulnerable spot before continuing.
"Let me up, damn you," she spat, wanting nothing more than to wipe that insufferably confident look off his face by raking her nails across it.
Harry simply moved further on top of her, licking, nipping and kissing every bit of bare skin he could reach. "Dear God, Gin, you're so sweet. Just good enough to eat. And now that you mention it, you're right. We never did go all the way. But you know something? It wasn't for lack of wanting to … so why don't we, while I'm still single?"
"Why not? You're sexy, you're gorgeous …"
"And you're randy," she retorted, squirming beneath him, doing her utmost (and failing) to avoid his eager lips, roaming hand and hungry body. "Besides, you've forgotten – ohh – you're supposed to be getting married soon. You should be with your fiancée, not me. Harry, no, please don't – oh, gods— And what makes you think she won't – moan – hex you into next year for hitting on me? In addition, you make one – louder moan – Harry, stop— wrong move and my brothers and parents will be on you like a storm of locusts!"
"I doubt it," her antagonist returned confidently even as he continued to move sensuously against her, feeling light-headed upon nuzzling her neck, inhaling her flowery scent, feeling her sweet body moving beneath him, her moans and movements inflaming him almost beyond control. "I already told your mum what I intended to do, you see. She'll keep everyone away until we're finished."
"Finished? Doing what? After the stunt you've pulled, I'm not – kiss – doing a – another moan – bloody thing with you!"
"Oh yes, you are," came the crooning reply. "One other thing. Has anyone ever told you that you talk entirely too much? There are much better things we can do with our lips." He once again cut her off with a kiss, not letting her speak again for a long time, even as he pushed her legs apart with one knee to lie between them.
"Damn you, Harry!" Ginny once again moaned with pleasure in spite of herself as he held her wrists in one hand and found her nearest breast after finally releasing her lips, then opening her blouse and vanishing her bra. "Isn't … Hermione enough for you? Why must you keep hitting on me?"
"That's not important right now. All that matters is us. Now shut up and kiss me."
"One last question."
"Do you intend to do this after you get married?"
"You'll find out," Harry growled seductively. "Now quiet. We're wasting time." With that, his kisses and caresses deepened, soon becoming intimate even as Ginny damned herself to the ninth circle of Wizarding Hell for her weakness where Harry was concerned before giving herself to him completely and unreservedly after he had vanished the rest of her clothes, knickers and all, as well as his own.