Author: Rasengan22

Summary: What happens in Cancun, should, theoretically, stay in Cancun. If you’re lucky anyway.

Pairings: Naruto and Sasuke somehow.

Written for Animehead. I only expect 3 or 4 chapters out of this (I hope).

Folding his book in half, Sasuke flipped to the next page. But he was finding it very difficult to concentrate what with the person on his other side leaning over him and leering into the side of his skull.

"Do you mind?" he asked rudely, only acknowledging the other person by lifting his eyes reluctantly from his novel to glance sidelong at him.

"No, not really." Came the nonplussed reply, and the other person had the audacity to try and cover up his utterly annoying personality with a big, bright, idiotic smile.

Sasuke sighed and set his book down in his lap. "I don't know how many times I have to explain this to you, Naruto. But there's a thing called personal space." Naruto continued to grin at him like Sasuke was lucky to be on this plane, sitting next to the one person in the world that could raise his blood pressure twenty points in just as many minutes.

Naruto reached over him anyway and picked up the book Sasuke had been reading. Sasuke narrowed his eyes as Naruto ended up losing his place and turned it upside down, bringing the book close to his face to read the back of the jacket. "Is this any good?"

Sasuke tried to take some calming breaths, repeating a few non-violent mantras in his head. I will not kill Naruto on this trip. I will not kill Naruto on this trip. Naruto poked him in the shoulder with the corner of the book.

"Hey, hey, I'm asking you a question, douche bag. Isn't this part of the Oprah Book Club or something? Why are you reading this?" Naruto shuffled through the pages a few times before Sasuke snatched it away from him and smacked him upside the head with it.

"What is that on your fingers?" Sasuke stared at Naruto's fingertips. They were covered in some kind of greasy brown sauce. At least Sasuke hoped that was sauce.

Naruto, already having forgotten about the book displayed his fingers in front of his face and then sucked one into his mouth. "Hm. It tastes like that sauce for the chicken we had an hour ago."

Sasuke wrinkled his nose, turned in his confining seat and glared at Naruto. The blond finally finished sucking on his soiled fingers and innocently glanced up at Sasuke.

"What?" he asked and swiped his palms over the thighs of his jeans even though there was still that napkin with the printed Delta logo he had stuffed into the pouch of the seat in front of him.

Sasuke found that even though he had known Naruto for ten years, even though they had been best friends for seven of those years, even though Sasuke had voluntarily decided to sit by Naruto--well that is after pulling the smallest straw out of the bunch--sometimes Naruto could irritate him so much that he lost the ability to articulate his anger and frustration. He dragged his palm against his cheek. His skin felt hot.

"Sasuke, your face is getting all red." Naruto brought his own face obscenely close to Sasuke's. The black-haired boy narrowed his eyes, almost having to cross them in the process. Naruto's expression softened suddenly. "Do you need your stress ball?" He patted Sasuke's leg, right near his knee, and Sasuke's reflex was to kick out. His foot slammed against the back of the seat in front of him.

"Who the hell did that? What the fuck?" Came the growl from the person sitting in said seat. There was the sound of a food tray being slammed upright, a seatbelt being unclicked and then Kiba's disjointed head appeared above the seat. Kiba looked from Naruto to Sasuke, noticing the way the two boys faces were suspiciously close together. He eyed them curiously. "Why are you two so close?"

Sasuke and Naruto gave each other a confused glance. Sasuke sat back in his seat first, and then Naruto was quick to move away, too.

"Hm," Kiba murmured, rubbing at his chin. "Just, uh, don't do it again." He paused. "Yeah."

Sasuke could hear Kiba whispering to Shino after he sat down. Something about not wanting to be the ones to share the hotel room with them if they were going to be staring in each other's eyes the entire time. Sasuke, of course, just glared at the back of the seat, but he should have counted on Naruto not being able to keep his dumb mouth shut.

"I can hear you, asshole. We are NOT gay over here."

Sasuke lowered his head and closed his eyes. "Shut up, Naruto."

"And even if I was gay," Naruto scooted forward, trying to catch Kiba's eye through the gap between Shino's upright and Kiba's reclined seat. He lowered his voice, sounding completely offended by the idea, "Do you really think I'd let Sasuke anywhere near my ass?"

Kiba, of course, because he was more of a dumbass than Naruto, reclined his seat further so he could argue with him. "Shouldn't you be the one that would be going near his ass if you were gay? You want Sasuke to fuck you?"

Sasuke groaned and shifted his attention to the window, trying to focus on the blue sky and the flat valley of clouds underneath the plane.

"W-what?" Naruto stuttered. "Of course not! Sasuke wouldn't fuck me in a million years!"

"You've got that right," Sasuke found himself muttering to the window. Naruto socked him in the shoulder without tearing his gaze away from Kiba. Shino, apparently, had the courtesy to not get involved in the conversation. Or maybe he was asleep. Lucky bastard, Sasuke thought to himself.

"I," Naruto pointed to his chest with his thumb, "am totally fuckable. Any man alive, gay or straight, would want a piece of this."

Kiba let out a bark of laughter that probably even the pilots in the cockpit could hear. "Let's take a poll shall we." The brown-haired boy began looking around at the other passengers nearby.

"Anyone here interested in boning this blond retard here, please raise your hand!" Kiba and Naruto both glanced around, Naruto looking half-heartedly expectant.

Sasuke feigned like he was sleeping, even though he could feel two pairs of eyes on him. Naruto grumbled something he couldn't catch. Not that he cared.

"And there we have it," Kiba stated smugly. "You're going to remain an ass virgin for the rest of your life." He sat back down in his seat and put his headphones on, confident in his victory.

Sasuke's eyes snapped open when he felt a sharp elbow in his side. Reflexively, he punched Naruto hard in the shoulder, making sure to use the hand on which he wore a class ring that once belonged to his father.

"Fuck. Ow." Naruto rubbed at his abused shoulder. "What was that?" he asked accusingly. "You're supposed to have my back!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes and picked his book up again. There's no way he'd be able to fall asleep for the rest of the flight if he was going to be sitting by Naruto. He already knew the blond probably slept no more than four hours a night thanks to his serious bout of ADD.

He opened up the copy of Slaughterhouse 5 he'd borrowed from Itachi, but Naruto tugged on the spine and yanked it down. Sasuke growled deeply in his throat. If he didn't think he'd get arrested for doing it, he would have flat out decked Naruto. But with his luck, there'd probably be an air marshal on board and he'd get thrown in Guantanamo Bay as some kind of terrorist. That wasn't what he had in mind for a spring break vacation.

"Not literally," Sasuke quipped, slapping Naruto's hand away from the pages.

"What?" Naruto asked, massaging his hand.

Sasuke gripped the book more tightly, bending it to the point it would probably never regain its shape. "You said I was supposed to have your back." His eyebrow twitched. "And I said 'not literally.' "

"Oh." Naruto scratched at the back of his head. "You made a joke. I see."

Sasuke growled again and decided he would just tune Naruto out, even if he had to force himself to become deaf. Maybe God would grant him that one small miracle this afternoon.

Naruto was quiet for a few minutes before he began fidgeting in his seat. His arm kept bumping into Sasuke's shoulder.

"Wanna play cards?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke didn't respond. He knew that if he read this sentence for the fifth time, he might actually be able to move on to the following paragraph.

"Are you mad at me?" Naruto leaned into his personal space bubble again, hovering over his shoulder and close enough that Sasuke could feel hot breath against the skin of his neck, making the hairs stand at attention.

"I hate you." Sasuke covered his face with the book, hoping to smother himself.

Naruto stared indifferently at Sasuke for a while. "Sasuke?"

"WHAT?" Sasuke shouted, the angry noise enough to make Naruto jump in his seat.

The blond gave a short chuckle, asking sardonically, "Should I get your squishy stress ball from out of the overhead compartment?"

Sasuke took in a deep breath and slid the book off of his face. He bowed his head and stared down helplessly into his lap, eyes following the seam of his blue jeans. "Yes, please."

Sasuke slid the cardboard key into the slot of the hotel room door. Naruto and Kiba were busy shoving each other behind him, and Shino was staring over the balcony and down at the people who were already enjoying the pool.

"Oh my God," Naruto practically screeched in Sasuke's ear just as he pushed it open. "We are so going to skinny dip tonight."

Sasuke tried his best not to let the image that created flash for very long in his head. He shoved his way into the room. Naruto and Kiba stomped along behind him, throwing down their luggage near the wall adjacent to the rather spatially-challenged looking bathroom.

Shino strolled in after them, adjusting his dark sunglasses with his one hand. He followed Sasuke to the other end of the room, where they then placed their own luggage next to a desk covered in a bunch of brochures and a large, black information-filled binder.

Kiba and Naruto ran out of the room again after propping the door open. They were ogling the half naked people in the pool no doubt.

Sasuke grunted, noticing Shino heading for the bathroom out of the corner of his eye. He went over to the desk and fingered through some of the pamphlets. There was information about places to eat, clubs, and all kinds of activities like parasailing and snorkeling. He had been to Mexico a couple times before on family vacations.

He heard Naruto and Kiba whistling and shouting out some rather lame pick-up lines. He heard the toilet flush, and shortly after, Shino popped out of the bathroom.

Shino came up behind him and Sasuke showed him one of the glossy, colorful brochures he was looking at. He tugged it open to reveal the inside of some dance club, which looked so crowded on the inside, it had to be a fire hazard.

"That looks like an interesting place," Shino said, pushing his glasses up on the bridge of his nose.

"It looks like an orgy of morons," Sasuke said dryly. He glanced over his shoulder to make sure neither of the twin idiots hadn't accidentally fallen over the side of the balcony. "Naruto will probably enjoy it." He smirked because he knew it was true.

"Probably," Shino answered, and Sasuke was thankful that at least one half-sane person had come along on the trip.

Sasuke set the pamphlet back down on the desk just in time for Naruto and Kiba to come bounding into the hotel room. Naruto jumped up onto the bed--his dirty flip-flops still on his feet--and ripped his shirt off over his head. Kiba laughed at him and did a graceless backward flop onto the other bed.

Sasuke watched them for a few seconds, finding it amusing how much they reminded him of apes in a zoo. Maybe they would start cleaning each other by picking fleas and bugs out of their hair.

After another jump, Naruto crashed down onto the mattress. Shino moved to sit on the edge of the bed that Kiba was laid out on. Sasuke scowled at the lot of them, crossing his arms over his chest to show his disapproval.

Naruto flung his white t-shirt at Sasuke's face. Sasuke caught it deftly and threw it on the shaggy blue carpet. Naruto shrugged and folded his arms behind his head.

"If you're going to get naked in our bed, can you at least shower first?" Sasuke said. "You stink."

Naruto sniffed at his left armpit.

"Gross, dude," Kiba mumbled from the opposite bed.

"I is a little rank, I suppose," Naruto agreed, fussing with the black sunglasses he had pushed up on top of his head. "Wanna join me?" He waggled his eyebrows at Sasuke.

Sasuke rolled his eyes and slipped off his leather sandals, aligning them with the edge of his expensive Samsonite luggage. "Sure," he said. "You go get started, and I'll join you, oh, in about four or five days after we've all flown back home."

"Ha ha," Naruto laughed unconvincingly. "You're so damn funny!"

"I think it's pretty funny," Kiba said, throwing an arm over his eyes. "I'm kinda tired."

Naruto rolled onto his side. "What? We just got into Cancun, and you're tired?"

"We had to get up at 4 a.m. just to drive to the airport, and you were so damn loud on the plane that I couldn't sleep!" Kiba yelled.

Naruto sat himself up on the edge of the bed. "Whatever. You were just as loud as I was!"

"I slept fine," Shino interjected.

Kiba and Naruto glanced at him oddly. Sasuke just sighed and crawled onto the other side of the bed, which he guessed he would be sharing with Naruto. He was used to it though, and if Naruto tried to hog the bed, he could just shove him over the side, doubting the blond would even wake up. Naruto could sleep through a hurricane.

"Why don't we just rest for an hour," Sasuke suggested, laying his head down on the pillow. "Then we can shower." He glanced pointedly at Naruto, who then scowled at him in return. "Then we'll go to dinner, and then out somewhere where we all want to go."

"Sounds good to me," Kiba said through a yawn.

"Me too," Shino agreed.

"See." Sasuke glanced up at Naruto. "Some people enjoy relaxing while on vacation."

"Fine," Naruto pouted, his bottom lip jutting out. That look always sent a sensation down to Sasuke's fist. He wanted to punch it off. "Then I'll go down to the pool for a while and be back in an hour."

"Good," Kiba said enthusiastically. "Then we'll be able to get some sleep!"

"I can tell when I'm not wanted." Naruto crossed his arms over his bare chest and looked away, closing his eyes. He scratched absently near his right nipple with his thumb. Sasuke glanced away when he accidentally caught the gesture.

He kicked Naruto's hip gently with his foot. "Just come back in one piece."

Naruto dropped his arms and jumped up onto the bed, staring down at Sasuke with a huge grin on his face. He sank to his knees at Sasuke's side and shook his shoulder.

"Say you love me," he said, still smiling goofily and shaking Sasuke.

The dark-haired boy tried to keep a small, traitorous grin from forming on his face, which turned out to be easy because now he wished he'd never said anything nice. That way Naruto would have gotten the hell out of the room by now.

"Sasuke! Say you love me! What if some drug lord comes and kidnaps me while I'm down there and stuffs me into his trunk, holds me for ransom and then sodomizes me in front of a camera to terrorize my family." Naruto's expression changed into one of horror. "And then they put it on YouTube!"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, starting to feel vaguely concerned for Naruto's mental health. "Then I'd want to thank them personally?"

"You suck." Naruto let go of him and frowned. He poked Sasuke in the arm. "I love you," he said, giving Sasuke another irritating poke.

Sasuke sighed and looked over at the other bed, silently pleading for help. The other guys were pretending to be asleep, but Sasuke could clearly see the smile on Kiba's face.

"If I say it, will you leave me the fuck alone?" Sasuke asked, rubbing at his forehead.

Naruto brought his face close to Sasuke's. "Yes. Promise. Scouts honor."

"You were never a Boy Scout," Sasuke pointed out.

"Say it, and I'll leave." Naruto bounced up and down on his knees, tugging at the dark blue sleeve of Sasuke's shirt.

"Fine," Sasuke growled, looking up into blue eyes that always made him wonder if maybe his heart wasn't made out of ice after all. Stupid global warming. Naruto clapped his hands, and slid his sunglasses down over his eyes. "I love you," he whispered begrudgingly.

"What was that?" Naruto brought his hand up to his ear. "I didn't quite hear you."

"Fuck off," Sasuke sighed and closed his eyes.

"I know you love me, bastard."

Sasuke flipped onto his side, presenting Naruto with his back. He didn't feel Naruto move for a while, and then the bed shifted after a couple minutes.

"I'll be back in an hour." Naruto had the courtesy to lower his voice.

Sasuke raised his arm and gave a half-hearted wave goodbye. "Try not to impregnate anyone."

"I'll do my best!" Naruto said cheerfully as he slipped on his shoes, grabbed his keycard and headed out of the room. Unfortunately, it slammed loudly behind him.

Sasuke glared at the flowery wallpaper on the wall, wondering why he had ever agreed to this trip. He had this feeling that nothing good would come of it. Especially with Naruto around. With any luck, maybe those drug lords really would kidnap him. If only he hadn't promised the Uzumakis that he'd keep an eye on their son.

Ugh, Sasuke thought in disgust. Since when did I become such a nice person?

"You guys are gay," Kiba muttered all of a sudden.

Sasuke was satisfied to hear a curse fly out of Kiba's mouth after nailing him in the head with a shoe.

"You're gay," Sasuke mumbled, and buried his head back into the pillow.

A petite, dark-haired waitress brought another large pitcher of beer. With barely a thanks, Kiba snatched it away from her and began pouring it into his mug. Naruto thwacked him on the back of the head with a rolled up set of silverware.

"You don't have to be so rude, dumbass," Naruto chided and attempted to steal away the pitcher for himself.

"What?" Kiba barked back. "It's her job to bring us what we order!"

Naruto began to stand, but there wasn't room enough with them squeezed into a large, circular booth. He only managed to get partially out of the seat to lean over the table.

"Yeah, well, have some manners about it! It sucks having to cater to a bunch of ungrateful jerks like you all night!" Naruto glared at his friend. Kiba glared back.

"Children," Sasuke spoke from Naruto's other side. "Can we save the fighting for when Shino and I are nowhere near you. I don't want people to assume that we associate with morons like yourselves."

Shino tried to hide his smile by taking a chip from the straw basket in the center of the table, dipping it in some fresh salsa and bringing it to his mouth. It crunched loudly as he took a bite.

"Whatever," Kiba huffed, taking a drink of his Bud Light. "Just because I hit a sore spot. It's not my fault Naruto's going to be working at T.G.I. Friday's for the rest of his life."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. Shino grabbed another tortilla chip, pouring a pinch of salt onto it. Sasuke watched as the other boy grabbed the lime from an empty Corona bottle and squeezed some juice onto it. He blinked twice before glancing over at Naruto.

"Oh, but he looks so good in that vest and all that flare," Sasuke said sarcastically.

Kiba laughed, his fist pounding on the table, hard enough to cause some of his beer to spill out onto the table. Sasuke grunted in disgust.

Naruto turned his disgruntlement on Sasuke. "What the hell, Sasuke? Do you really think that about me?"

Sasuke reached for the pitcher to refill his own drink. There was a reason why the majority of times he craved being less than sober involved forcibly being in the company of Naruto.

"See, see," Kiba laughed, pointing his finger at Sasuke over the table. "Even he thinks you're loser enough to be a waiter all your life."

"Shut up, Kiba." Sasuke rubbed at his forehead. Having Kiba and Naruto in one place was almost like having a clone of Naruto. Except, the only difference was, eventually Naruto knew when to quit. Kiba though, was an entirely different story.

"What?" Kiba asked defensively. He nudged Shino with his elbow. "Did it seem to you like Sasuke was defending Naruto's honor?"

"Leave me out of it, please," Shino said as he grabbed for his glass of iced water.

"I think I can handle my own battles," Naruto muttered dejectedly. Sasuke caught the sidelong glance of betrayal Naruto gave him.

"Naruto," Sasuke said and playfully swung his arm around the blond's shoulders, bringing his lips close to the other boy's ear. "You're not going to be a waiter the rest of your life, don't worry," he whispered, only half condescendingly. Naruto turned his head a little, and Sasuke had to back away an inch or his lips would have ended up brushing against the other's cheek.

"Really?" Naruto's eyes got big and watery, and it caused Sasuke's stomach and all its contents of tacos, chalupas, and fried ice cream to slop uncomfortably together. He really hated sentimental moments.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, and looked away from Naruto's pathetic sparkling eyes. Ugh, it was just so disgusting to him. He moved over a few inches on the seat, and it made a squeaking noise as he did. One which didn't go unnoticed by Naruto.

"Ah, Sasuke, are the beans getting to you already?" Naruto wrapped an arm around his own stomach, hunching forward and chuckling all over the place. Kiba started in soon after, giggling like they'd been drinking all night rather than just a couple hours.

Sasuke had a strong urge to get up from the table, find a chair, and heave it at Naruto's head, but he'd find another way to get back at the moron. Unlike his counterparts, Sasuke had actually been raised to have manners, so public brawls were out of the question. Even in Mexico, where he might be able to hire someone to get rid of the body.

"So Shino," Kiba started suddenly after regaining his breath from laughing. "What do you wanna do tomorrow?"

Shino glanced at his watch before looking at Kiba again. "Maybe we could take a coach to see these ancient Mayan ruins I read about in one of the brochures."

Naruto and Kiba both glanced at each other. Sasuke smirked, fully aware of what was about to happen. He tilted his head, and his bangs helped cover the side of his face where his lip curled up.

"You want to what?" Naruto asked calmly. Kiba's face was too busy morphing between a frown, a scowl and a grimace.

"I just thought we could do something educational while we're down here," Shino explained, pushing his glasses up on his nose. He leaned against the red, rubbery seat and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Wait, what?" Naruto spoke again, his face contorted in confusion.

"I don't think it's a bad idea," Sasuke added. He didn't care one way or the other, but he thought siding with Shino might rile Naruto up some more.

"Of course you wouldn't," Naruto shot back without even looking at Sasuke.

"You want to do something educational?" Kiba repeated skeptically.

They both looked at Shino like he was some kind of alien life form that had just announced they would both be anally probed within the next ten minutes. Sasuke took another drink of his beer, wondering how many glasses it had taken for him to be comfortable with an analogy like that.

Shino shrugged, completely unaffected by the other two boys ganging up on him. "Don't you think it's important to learn about other people's cultures when you visit their country?"

"No," Kiba and Naruto said in unison. Sasuke snickered at them.

"What are you laughing about, asshole?" Naruto squinted his eyes at Sasuke, who stared blankly back at him. Naruto grabbed for one of the chips, the basket quickly becoming depleted, and pointed one of the corners in Sasuke's direction.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the chip and then up into Naruto's face. "Are you really pointing that chip at me?"

"Yes," Naruto said, unfazed, a stupid grin on his face.

"Do you want me to kill you in your sleep tonight?" Sasuke asked, turning a bit in his seat so that he was facing Naruto more.

"As if you could," Naruto declared smugly.

"Oh really?" Sasuke raised an eyebrow. The other two at the table were watching their interaction quietly, both of them looking amused.

"Really."

"So I shouldn't bring up that time you spent the night and I hot glued the tie on your sweatpants so that you couldn't pull them down?"

Naruto frowned, glancing frantically over to the side of the table where Kiba and Shino were. "Shut up!"

Sasuke chuckled evilly. "And then in the morning, you had to go to the bathroom, and couldn't get your own pants off?"

"You asshole!" Naruto yelled and grabbed for the front of Sasuke's polo shirt.

"Should I tell them what happened after that?" Sasuke inquired, smirk set firmly.

"Holy shit, Naruto," Kiba squawked rather loudly. "Did you piss your pants?" He began laughing exaggeratedly. Shino didn't seem impressed either way, but was probably chuckling on the inside. Sasuke wasn't sure.

"I hate you," Naruto growled and let go of Sasuke's shirt so he could sulk. He folded his arms onto the table and brought his glass over to his mouth. He just barely rested his lips against the rim, as if he were going to suck on it, but then curled his fingers around the handle and tilted it lazily into his mouth.

"Haha," Kiba snickered. "I'm glad Sasuke's the one that's sleeping with you after all."

Naruto glared out of the corner of his eyes. "Yeah, probably so you can fondle Shino when he goes to sleep."

Kiba laughed nervously. "What are you talking about? Isn't that what you want to do with Sasuke?"

"Oh right," Naruto murmured, "Because you're the one who woke up with my hand on your crotch.

Sasuke glanced over at that comment, slightly intrigued. "What?" he asked, sensing a story behind all this.

"Naruto!" Kiba warned, his hand gripping his glass mug a little too tightly. His knuckles were beginning to turn white. The waitress chose that moment to come by and bring them another basket of chips. She picked up the empty one as well as a few empty shot glasses.

Naruto waited until she took everything away, thanking her politely before giving Kiba a rather devilish look.

Kiba made a groan of defeat and threw his hands up into the air. "It only happened once, okay!"

Naruto snorted. Sasuke and Shino exchanged an unreadable glance.

"I was totally asleep at the time. I was having a dream!"

"Yeah, about me," Naruto said. Sasuke let out a small chuckle, and Naruto's smile broadened at the sound.

"No," Kiba corrected, and slowly brought his glass up to his mouth, "About your mom."

Sasuke snorted as Naruto began to sputter. When Naruto tried to stand, Sasuke tugged him down hard by the sleeve of his black shirt.

"Let it go, dumbass," Sasuke spoke in Naruto's ear as the blond thudded heavily down onto the seat.

"Yeah, yeah," Naruto taunted. "Because those your mom jokes aren't juvenile!"

"Look who's talking, bed wetter!" Kiba glanced over at Shino, waiting for the other boy to compliment him on his insult. Shino was staring off in the direction of a large, potted palm near the exit that led to the stairs. Kiba immediately glanced at Sasuke to find approval there.

Sasuke toyed with his napkin, rubbing it back and forth on the table, and staring at the dark green diamond pattern stained onto its surface. "To be fair," Sasuke said in a low voice. "He wet his pants, not the bed."

Kiba burst into another round of drunken giggles, and Sasuke barely had time to laugh himself as he was suddenly mauled from the side by Naruto like he was some kind of mountain lion. Sasuke was too busy laughing at Naruto's expense to fight back and had no choice but to let the other boy tackle him onto the seat.

Naruto grabbed for Sasuke's wrists, and Sasuke had to adjust his position so that Naruto didn't break his spine in the process with his body at a weird angle. Luckily, the waitress had had sense enough to shove them all in a dark corner.

"Get off of me," Sasuke managed to gasp out.

"Not until you say uncle!" Naruto said, leaning over Sasuke's shaking form. "And stop laughing at me, you jerk! I got you back for that. Do you want me to reveal some of your dark secrets?

"Not really," Sasuke said calmly, dimly noting the way Naruto's palms were sort of sweaty against his skin.

"And I wouldn't," Naruto stated quietly, his face a little too close to Sasuke's for it to be comfortable, "Because that's how real friends are." Naruto sniffed, turning his head away. He let go of Sasuke's wrists and sat up.

Sasuke stared for a moment at the rusty-colored tiles on the ceiling. He rubbed at his left wrist where Naruto had grabbed a little too tightly, and his watch had ended up pinching the skin just near the heel of his palm. He sat back up slowly. When he looked over at Naruto, he expected the blond to be smiling, but he wasn't.

"Naruto," Sasuke said, as if he thought the other man was joking.

"No, I'm mad," Naruto said, obviously trying to ignore Sasuke.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "You're such a woman."

"Oh you'd like that, wouldn't you," Naruto mumbled under his breath.

Sasuke's eyebrow twitched. "What's that? I couldn't quite hear you."

"You heard me," Naruto countered.

"Boys, boys," Kiba interrupted, lifting himself up to pour more beer into both their mugs. "I don't know about you, but watching you two wrestle got me to thinking about what we could do tomorrow."

Sasuke gave Naruto another sidelong glance, sort of pissed off and a little annoyed at Naruto's sudden standoffish behavior. It was always alright for Naruto to pick fights, but when Sasuke pushed back, Naruto didn't always handle it very well.

"Oh yeah?" Naruto grumbled into his glass.

"Yeah." Kiba rubbed at his chin, appearing thoughtful. "How about like a wet t-shirt contest or something? I wanna see one of them before we leave."

Sasuke and Shino didn't act surprised by Kiba's suggestion. Sasuke didn't care either away. That wasn't really his type of thing. There wasn't anything particularly attractive about women being watered down with hoses while a bunch of greasy frat boys ogled their chests.

"Hm," Naruto murmured, tilting his head in consideration. "I dunno. It's not a terrible idea."

"What?" Kiba sounded surprised. "I thought you'd totally be into it!"

"I might if I got to be one of the judges," Naruto raised his head and smiled a little. Sasuke was surprised when the blond turned to him and winked. "Maybe Sasuke could join in, huh? He kinda looks like a girl."

"Yeah, but he's terribly flat," Kiba responded, a little too seriously for Sasuke's taste. Naruto nodded to that in earnest, as if he was actually considering having Sasuke enter a women's wet t-shirt contest.

"I hope so," Shino said, looking in Sasuke's direction.

Sasuke gazed at all of them as if they were insane. He wasn't sure where to start being insulted: the part where Naruto said he looked like a girl or the idea that they all thought he would actually willingly be a part of it.

Naruto nudged him in the side, and Sasuke turned gradually, locking eyes with the blond. There was a tingling sensation in Sasuke's fist that he knew he wouldn't be able to control for the entire week. Now wasn't the time though to give Naruto the black eye he deserved.

"So if you want to be the judge," Sasuke said slowly, "Does that mean you just want to see me naked?"

Mirth sparkled like little rays of light in Naruto's blue eyes. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"Hn," Sasuke smirked. "If that's what you wanted," he said, quietly, teasingly, probably not loud enough for the other two to hear. "All you had to do was ask."

Naruto smirked, too, keeping a level gaze with Sasuke as he took another drink of his beer. "Get me another few rounds of these, and I just might," he said and laughed happily.

Sasuke grinned, somehow pleased that Naruto wasn't really angry at him and took another sip of his drink.

Hours later, after walking along the boardwalk near their hotel, the group had pretty much decided to head back to their room. Even Naruto was admitting tiredness, and everyone was a little more drunk than they expected.

Or at least Sasuke came to that conclusion as he found himself stumbling every once in a while only to have Naruto catch him and prevent him from falling on his face.

During the day, the shops and arcades had been open along the beach but were now boarded up for the night. The air was a little chill and smelled of the ocean. There were quite a few people walking around on the beach. There was even a group trying to throw a football under the frail light emanating from the light posts along the sidewalk.

Naruto was the first to hop off the wooden walkway and onto the sand. He stopped long enough to slip off his sandals. He bent over and grabbed them in his hands, beckoning the rest of them to follow. Sasuke, feeling buzzed and content, stepped off as well. Kiba was chattering to Shino about some girl they had seen earlier lounging by the pool.

Naruto walked quietly at Sasuke's side, staring out into the ocean. The night sky was dark. In the distance, there was the blinking red light of a plane passing through the wispy tufts of clouds. Lots of stars were out, each like a steady, eternal pinpoint that promised to never disappear.

"It's nice to see the ocean, isn't it?" Naruto pondered out loud.

Sasuke grunted in agreement, his lungs deeply inhaling the smell of the water and finding it completely relaxing. A surprisingly warm gale of air swept over the beach suddenly, and the waves lapped softly against the shore. There were rocks a short way out, and Sasuke watched the way the water rushed up against it, splashing white foam into the air.

"It's so quiet and peaceful," Naruto said. "I wish we lived near the ocean." He turned to Sasuke.

Sasuke glanced back at him and gave a small smile. "Yeah. It is nice to get away," he agreed, stumbling again.

He was drunk alright, but maybe not so drunk that he could get through one of Naruto's sentimental reveries. But it did feel nice. Naruto and Kiba had stopped arguing. Sasuke glanced behind them, wondering why he hadn't heard from the other two in a while and saw Kiba and Shino standing in the water, the waves up to their knees.

He and Naruto continued walking. Sasuke liked Naruto's spontaneous, humorous side, but he also liked the side of Naruto that was serious and thoughtful. It seemed to only happen when the two of them were together, and it was at these times, he thought he could tell the blond anything without being judged.

"So what do you want to do tomorrow, Sasuke?" Naruto asked, swinging his flip flops at his side. He kicked up some wet sand and sent it flying into the water. It made an audible plopping noise.

"I don't know," Sasuke answered. "Whatever you want to do is fine."

"Mm. Yeah, but I want you to have fun, too." Naruto bumped into his shoulder playfully, and Sasuke grinned. The wind whipped through again and ruffled the other man's blond hair, and also sent Sasuke's bangs flying in front of his eyes. Sasuke smoothed them away behind his ears with the swipe of his hand.

"Don't worry about me," Sasuke said after a short while. He saw Naruto frown.

"But I always worry about you," the blond said with a little pout.

Suddenly, there could be heard the sound of people running behind them. Naruto and Sasuke both turned to find Kiba trying to catch up to them, holding something in his fisted hand. Shino was just a short distance behind him, walking, but at a hurried pace.

"Look," Kiba said, jogging up to Naruto's other side. He held out his hand and opened it. "It's a hermit crab!" The boy poked at it, and it shriveled up into its shell.

Naruto laughed at the creature. "It's just like Sasuke!" He glanced over at the dark-haired boy, grinning like an idiot at his own joke.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, nodding a greeting at Shino as he took his spot on Sasuke's side.

"So what do we do now?" Kiba asked. He stopped to set the crab back down into the sand.

"Well," Naruto said, rubbing his hands together gleefully. "I say we break into the pool and try a little skinny dipping."

Sasuke didn't respond, because there was no way he would ever do that.

"I'm beginning to think you just like being naked," Kiba observed but sounded as if he might be tempted.

Shino was staring straight ahead. "No thanks," he said. "I'm actually just wanting to get back to the room and turn on my laptop."

"Sasuke's too much of a prude to go," Naruto said bitterly. "C'mon, Kiba, don't be a chicken!"

"I'm no chicken, Uzumaki. I'm going, so shut up already," he slurred.

"Are you sure you two are sober enough to be swimming," Shino asked. Sasuke had been wondering the same thing, but Naruto was the type to be able to hold his liquor.

"We're fine," Naruto answered for them, waving away Shino's concern.

"Yeah," Kiba agreed. "Naruto was a lifeguard last summer, remember?"

Sasuke snorted. "Yeah, he monitored the kiddy pool the majority of the time."

"Hey," Naruto defended. "That's where all the hot baby-sitter chicks were at."

"Sure," Sasuke teased. They all turned around and began heading back in the direction of the hotel.

Sasuke was reading his book, listening to Shino type away at his laptop in the other bed. Kiba and Naruto had left an hour ago, wearing nothing but white robes. He just hoped that they wouldn't end up getting arrested for trespassing. It wasn't in their trip budget to have to bail the two of them out of some Mexican jail.

"Do you think they're okay by themselves?" Shino asked without tearing his eyes away from the bright screen, where he was checking his e-mail.

Sasuke flipped to the next page, having made some progress without Naruto's constant interference. "What's the worst that can happen?" he asked offhandedly.

"I don't think I want to answer that," Shino answered, shrugging as he crossed his legs at the ankles, itching a spot on his left foot with the toes of his right.

Sasuke, having put his reading glasses on for the night, tugged them off so that he could rub at the bridge of his nose where the ill-fitting frame scraped irritatingly against his skin.

Both men nearly jumped as the door abruptly slammed open, a soaked and robe-wearing Kiba running into the center of the room, waving his hands wildly.

"You guys," Kiba was already tugging at Sasuke's sleeve. Sasuke yanked it back. Kiba was dripping all over his navy sweatpants.

"What is it, Kiba?" Sasuke sat up on the edge of the bed, rubbing at his temple.

"It's Naruto," Kiba said, sounding panicked to the point that Sasuke's heart suddenly skipped a beat.

"He, uh, he fell into the pool and I, managed to get him out but he's not breathing right."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Sasuke yelled, standing up and shaking Kiba at the shoulders.

Sasuke was already almost out the door in an instant, Kiba right behind him. Shino might have followed them, but Sasuke had no clue. All he could hear was the intense pounding of his heart. He raced down the stairwell, taking the steps three at a time. Even Kiba wasn't able to keep up with him.

Sasuke got to the patio, and nearly hurdled himself over the fence surrounding the pool. There weren't any lights on. No one else was there, but he saw the prone form lying near the edge, a white robe draped over him. Kiba was right, Naruto wasn't moving. It didn't look like his chest was rising at all.

Sasuke ran to Naruto's side, dropped hard to his knees on the cement and swiped the wet bangs out of Naruto's face. He bent over, pressing his ear against Naruto's chest. Naruto's heart was beating, and his body was still warm as he pushed the robe down to Naruto's waist.

Kiba's feet slapped against the pavement and he also jumped over the fence and stood behind Sasuke. Sasuke curled his fingers at his hairline, pushing his hair out of his face. He lifted his head, his face just over Naruto's, trying to listen for his breath. He couldn't hardly feel it against his cheek.

"Maybe you'll have to do CPR," he heard Kiba say in the background. Shino had come up behind Kiba and was staring down at Naruto's limp body, which Sasuke was currently hunched over.

Sasuke didn't think twice about what he needed to do. He didn't get the sense that Naruto was breathing, so he immediately set his hands on the blond's bare chest to begin compressions. He was already pinching Naruto's nose. He took a deep breath and leaned in toward Naruto's face, his heart about to explode out of his ribcage.

His lips hovered just above Naruto's when suddenly blue eyes opened wide and he heard Kiba begin to laugh.

"Aww, Sasuke," Naruto said in a nasally voice what with Sasuke still pinching his nose. "If you wanted a kiss, all you had to do was ask."

Kiba laughed even harder in the background.

"You guys are sick," was all Shino said before leaving.

Naruto looked up into Sasuke's face, the black-haired boy's bangs were sliding against the blond's cheek. Sasuke closed his eyes, removing his hand slowly from Naruto's nose.

"You were really gonna do it," Naruto said, grinning. Sasuke sat up on his knees, which were aching and burning where he'd probably scraped the skin in his effort to get to Naruto's side.

Sasuke said nothing. He just sat there, with his eyes closed, and his fists clenched at his side. Naruto sat up on his butt, the robe falling like a loin cloth in between his tanned legs. He braced himself by leaning back on his arms.

"Sasuke," Naruto said, humor still evident in his voice.

Sasuke finally opened his eyes but didn't see anything. He had completely sobered up. He took one look at Naruto's grinning face.

And punched him.

He punched him so hard, that Naruto fell and rolled over the edge of the pool and into the water, robe and all.

Sasuke stood at the edge of the pool and glared down at Naruto, who was now treading easily, his hair plastered to his face.

"If you ever, if you ever fucking do that to me again," Sasuke screamed. "I will kill you." He had his fists balled at his side. He had never been so pissed in his life and felt all kinds of anger and betrayal that Naruto would even think a prank like that would be funny.

Kiba stepped up behind him and placed a hand on his trembling shoulder. "It was just a joke, man. Sorry."

Sasuke violently shrugged off the hand. "What the hell is so fucking funny about pretending to be dead?" He glared down at Naruto, as if it was the blond who had asked the question.

"Sasuke," Naruto whimpered, swimming to the side of the pool and gripping onto it.

"I don't even want to hear it, Naruto," Sasuke said through clenched teeth. "Don't even talk to me the rest of this trip."

"C'mon," Naruto pleaded. "We seriously didn't mean anything by it. I thought you'd figure it was just a prank to get you back for earlier."

"Yeah," Sasuke seethed. "Some prank. Real fucking funny." He turned his back on Naruto, not looking at Kiba either, though he could tell the other boy was immensely frightened and sorry for what he'd done. But he hadn't expected such a shitty trick from Naruto.

"Sasuke, I'm sorry!" Naruto yelled as Sasuke climbed his way over the fence, feeling like someone had just used a gun and shot a hole through his chest.

He heard the boys squabbling over whose fault it was for going through with it all as he stomped up the stairwell. It would take a shitload of apologizing on Naruto's part to make that up to him. What he found most annoying was not that he'd been tricked by Naruto, but for a minute there, he was really terrified a the idea of losing the blond.

"Idiot," Sasuke murmured as he knocked on the hotel door since he'd forgotten a key in his rush to get downstairs. Shino let him in, and Sasuke headed straight for the bathroom, ready to take his second shower for the night. He needed to think, to get away. Shino left him in peace, not saying anything, and Sasuke was glad for that.

Twenty minutes under boiling hot water, Sasuke finally emerged from the bathroom, having completely fogged over the mirror. He toweled his hair. All the lights were off except the small lamp near the bed he and Naruto would have to share. Everyone seemed to be asleep. Naruto had apparently tugged back the blankets on Sasuke's side and set his pillows out for him.

Kiba was snoring loudly, lying on his stomach. Shino was on his back, his arms stiff at his sides. Sasuke maneuvered past their bed, careful not to trip on Naruto's luggage that was sticking out.

The shower had calmed him somewhat, but he was still fairly angry. Naruto was curled on his side, facing the wall. Sasuke moved quietly to his side of the bed, looking down at Naruto's face, wondering if he was really sleeping or not. He got under the covers and stared at the ceiling for a few minutes, listening to the sound of Kiba's loud snoring. He reached up and, with a little trouble, finally managed to turn the stubborn knob on the lamp all the way until the light went out.

Another few minutes of silence elapsed, and Sasuke finally spoke. "I know you're not asleep."

"How could I?" Naruto said softly, sounding utterly wretched, like maybe he'd even been crying, but Sasuke doubted it as he rarely saw Naruto cry. "I really am very sorry, Sasuke. I had no idea you'd think we were serious."

"How could I not take it seriously?" Sasuke hissed. He heard Naruto scoot across the sheets and felt the blond's body warmth against his side. He smelt of chlorine.

"I'm sorry. What more do you want me to say?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke rolled to his side and grabbed on tightly to the wrist that had been resting on Naruto's hip.

"Ow, fuck, Sasuke, that hurts!" Naruto cried out in a pained whisper.

"Yeah, and what you did hurt me, too, you ass," Sasuke whispered back.

"So how can I make it up to you?" Naruto didn't struggle to fight his way out of Sasuke's hold. Sasuke let him go though, figuring Naruto thought he probably deserved to be manhandled.

"I don't know," Sasuke sighed. Naruto reached out and tentatively tugged on Sasuke's sleeveless nightshirt, tickling his stomach with the gesture as it rubbed against his skin.

"I'll let you pop my ass cherry," Naruto joked.

Sasuke rubbed his chest with his hand, still feeling the ache in his knees. When he'd looked at them in the bathroom, they were already beginning to bruise. "That's hardly compensation for what you put me through. Why don't you give me something I actually want," Sasuke said, even sounding a tad bitter. "You can't solve everything with jokes, you know."

"I know," Naruto said and flipped onto his back. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"You weren't," Sasuke said curtly.

"I wasn't."

"Don't do it again." He turned to Naruto. "How's your jaw?" He'd forgotten that he'd even punched Naruto. His fist had moved of its own accord.

"It's sore," Naruto answered him.

"Good. I'm going to sleep."

"Alright," Naruto said hesitantly. Sasuke waited, holding his breath. He couldn't believe that he was the one beginning to feel bad for making Naruto feel guilty. "Will we be okay?"

Sasuke let out a long sigh. Of course everything would be okay, even by tomorrow morning, but still.

"Just don't do that again." Sasuke glanced sidelong at Naruto, the other boy meeting his gaze. Even in the darkness, he could see the worry and regret etched into Naruto's face. Stupid guilt. Stupid Naruto. "Your stupidity will only save you so many times. You're lucky I'm just feeling sorry for you that you're such an idiot."

"I know," Naruto breathed. "I didn't know you'd get so worried about me."

"That's why you're an idiot," Sasuke murmured. Naruto gave him a small smile.

"You love me," Naruto sing-songed and poked Sasuke in the shoulder.

Sasuke huffed and rolled onto his side, his back to Naruto. "Go to sleep," he said, giving up.

"Fine."

It was quiet for all of two minutes. Sasuke wasn't even close to falling asleep.

"Tomorrow," he heard Naruto whisper. "Tomorrow, I'll do anything you want."

"Anything?" Sasuke asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Sure, anything."

Sasuke considered this for a moment, thinking of all the possible humiliating situations he could throw Naruto into, even the wet t-shirt contest. He grinned at the ugly wallpaper covered in tropical flowers.

"Deal," he said, and shut his eyes, feeling suddenly tired enough to fall asleep.